A/N: "So the Palestinians have gotten observer status in the UN. So what? They can't vote for or against any UN resolutions, so it's not like they can actually influence any decisions made in the UN, right? So really it's just symbolical, right?" That was what part of the Israeli press said to try to make people less nervous about the whole Palestine issue. Well, sorry to burst you bubble, but the observer status thingy? That means they can speak in the UN, which can influence people's decisions, and they can go to the International Court at The Hague, so they can press charges against Israel for existing/not recognizing them as a country because we want to exist/any excuse they come up with will be accepted. No, seriously, there's this double standard within the UN where Assad can kill 200 Syrians a day and we can't build in our own areas because it's "occupied territory". There was a caricature a few weeks ago in this newspaper called "Yisra'el HaYom" (Israel Today) where Assad is in the background standing on a pile of dead Syrians and shooting everywhere, and the UN is pointing at him and saying to Bibi Netanyahu (Israel's Prime Minister), "Look, we know he's bad, but at least he's not building in E1!" E1 is this area between Jerusalem and Ma'ale Adumim where apparently we can't build because it'll hurt Palestine's territorial continuity. Well, first of all, Palestine won't even have territorial continuity, because the West Bank is not connected to the Gaza Strip at all. Second of all, Ma'ale Adumim is a Jewish suburb of Jerusalem which will stay in Israel anyway, even if there will be a Palestinian country, so E1 would have to be in Israel. Third of all, it's not going to hurt the territorial continuity within the West Bank, because they'll still have the Jericho area. Apparently, they want East Jerusalem as their capital, but the thing is, even the Arabs in Jerusalem want a united Jerusalem, and the Palestinians' capital is pretty much Ramallah, so that's not a problem either. And if that's not enough, they've got a perfectly good suburb in the southeast called Abu Dis, which they can turn into the capital. They claim that Ramallah won't be connected to Bethlehem, but as I've said, they have the entire Jericho area. It might not be very convenient, but we've had to go around the entire West Bank for 19 years, so I think they can manage that small inconvenience of having to go around E1. This chapter is actually a parody of the current political situation in Israel, because someone other than the Israeli newspaper "Maqor Rishon" (Primary Source) has to do it. And HOLY COW I ALMOST TOOK THE WHOLE PAGE WITH MY RANT HAS THE WORLD REALLY ENDED ON FRIDAY WHAT IS THIS WHERE AM I SOMEONE GET ME A PIZZA QUICK – right. The parody. *starts writing but is distracted by baby sister*

Disclaimer: I don't own A Very Potter Sequel or iheartmwpp.

Israel: What a lovely place in between Jerusalem and Ma'ale Adumim. Let's build there!

PNA: No.

Israel: We can build here, it's our territory!

PNA: No, it's ours.

Israel: Is not.

PNA: Is too!

Israel: Is not.

PNA: Is too!

Israel: How come?

PNA: It's part of our country!

Israel: What country?

PNA: The one we're trying to get!

Israel: Well, we offered you one 65 years ago and you didn't want it, so how come now you do?

PNA: DON'T QUESTION US. JUST SHADDUP AND GIVE US A COUNTRY.

Israel: No.

PNA: You can't build there, it's our territory!

Israel: No, it's ours.

PNA: Is not!

Israel: Is too.

PNA: Is not!

Israel: Is too.

PNA: How come?

Israel: We live there and stuff.

PNA: But it's part of our country!

Israel: We're sorry, but you guys don't have a country. We thought we've established that.

PNA: You've established that, we haven't!

Israel: That's nice for you.

PNA: No, it's not!

Israel: We gave you every single one of your cities/towns/villages/wherever else you may live in within the West Bank and Gaza and even some of ours! Why do you keep asking for what we kept? You don't even live there! Well, other than in East Jerusalem, but the Arabs who live there want it to stay here! AND we give you water, food, electricity, and other supplies because we're nice!

PNA: We can't have an army!

Israel: You're training one anyways, so SHADDUP.

UN: WHAT THE DEVIL IS GOING ON HERE?

PNA: They're building in E1!

Israel: They're trying to get more than what we've generously given them!

UN: GASP! You're causing the Palestinians minor inconveniences, even though they've been causing you major inconveniences for several decades and more? I thought you guys have abided to our law!

Israel: Yes…

UN: Didn't you see that it says in the UN Charter, Chapter IV, Article 9, Subsection 1, "Thou shall not cause any inconveniences, minor as they may be, to the people who hate you with the burning passion of a thousand suns"?

Israel: Actually, it says, "The General Assembly shall consist of all the Members of the United Nations."

yoneld: I've actually looked it up.

UN: WE DON'T CARE. No causing inconveniences for the Palestinians!

Israel: So…

UN: Yes.

Israel: You're saying…

UN: Yes.

Israel: That we should…

UN: Yes.

Israel: BUILD IN E1!

UN: Yes – wait no.

Israel: Yay! *build in E1*

UN: WE CONDEMN THIS ACTION!

PNA: WE'LL GET YOU FOR THAT!

Israel: Um schmum, and you guys always find an excuse to get us anyways, so we don't care. *keep building in E1*

A/N: So yeah, that's pretty much what's going on. At least we can make fun of it. The thing is, the UN is always against Israel. Someone I know says that the entire purpose of the UN is to condemn Israel. They should change it from UN to NUAI – Nations United Against Israel. That, or UH – United Hypocrites. And Um schmum is a Hebrew expression that basically says "screw the UN". I'll explain how that works. The UN in Hebrew is Um – Umot Meuhadot. You know how you put the schm- prefix in front of things that you don't like or you want to say "screw that" in a gentler way? So we use it in Hebrew too. It was first used by our first Prime Minister, David Ben-Gurion.

Review or the UN will condemn you.