Levi

I hadn't had vivid dreams of Eren since we'd gotten together, but this was a strange form of agony. I dreamed of battles, but not the blood and horror around me; all I could see was him, dancing and burning and igniting the sky with his anger.

He was always so alive, so determined. It rained when he cried. He kept all of us going on the days we felt like giving up. He was fiery and passionate, and I fell in love with the spark in his eyes. I wanted to speak in my dreams, tell him how much I missed him, how much I yearned for him every day, even though I had him.

But I couldn't, and it wouldn't matter anyways. The past was the past. All I could do was dream and love.

I woke up with tears in my eyes, and I hated that, because maybe I was the one that needed protecting. Maybe I was the one that wasn't truly ready for sex, and the one that was fragile. I hated myself for it, but I missed him. I missed sarcastic responses, angry kisses, poorly contained jealousy, the way that he was always looking at me, observing the slightest changes in my expression. I missed his rage. I missed it all.

After brushing my teeth and washing my face- my dark circles were awful- I watched the boy next to me sleep, his closed eyes and peaceful lips, and I knew that there were so many parts of him that I loved. His softness, his shyness, his subtle bravery, the way that he comforted and he always knew the right words to say.

The person that I was in this life needed him. I knew that, and yet here I was, an emotional wreck over the boy that I had never truly met.

"I miss you," I whispered, grazing his soft jaw line with the side of my hand.

His eyes blinked open, startlingly green against the white of my blanket. "What do you mean?"

How long had he been awake? We stared at each other for a moment. "Since when have you been awake?"

"I woke up a while ago, but I was just resting my eyes, waiting for you to wake up. I guess I kind of dozed off." Eren's eyes flickered from my chest to my eyes, noticing that they were glistening with tears. His tone grew softer as he murmured my name with that concerned tone of his, sitting up in alarm.

I knew it was time to tell him. "I'm alright. I started crying in my sleep."

He pulled my face to his, wiping the spilled tears away gently. "Something's bothering you. What's wrong?"

"I want to tell you about our past life." Oh, very subtle. Way to break it to him gently.

Eren's eyes widened slightly before narrowing. He nodded sharply, a look of similar determination in his eyes that nearly left me breathless. He took my hand. "I'm going to summarize, because I still have a lot to learn. Earth was being taken over by titans. They're basically… Really huge, genderless humans. You and I fought against them. I was a lance corporal. They called me 'Humanity's Strongest Soldier.'" I smiled a little bit, and watched his expression as it flickered between pride and nostalgia. "You were an angry thing. One of the titans attacked your mom, and it left you vengeful and determined. At one point in a war, everyone thought you had died. That was when we discovered that you could turn into titan."

"This all sounds… Familiar," he interrupted, his eyebrows furrowing. "Especially you being a corporal."

Smirking, I pulled him closer to me, whispering in his ear, "I would think you'd remember that. You moaned it enough times."

After intense blushing and a few stolen kisses, I got back on track. "You and I continued to fight, and we continued to get closer. We talked more, and spent more time together. I couldn't stop looking at you, and noticing little things that I hadn't before, like the light freckles on your nose and the shape of your lips. You looked at me a lot too, but you didn't try to hide that. We started touching more, in subtle ways, and you flirted with me when we got into petty arguments. You were really jealous of Erwin-" He stiffened at the name. "Even though I wasn't remotely attracted to him. One day you cornered me because you got so riled up, and you were really, really beautiful. You were blushing, but it wasn't from embarrassment, and you kissed me without saying a word. Not that I minded.

We kept getting closer. I proposed to you one night, and you nearly had a heart attack. We were so happy. And then in the final battle, you saved me. It was the only time I needed saving. A titan had broken my leg, and I was trying my best to fight, but it wasn't enough. You died doing that. I can't get that image out of my head, of the color draining from your face, and all of that blood…"

"Shh." He pulled me into him, rubbing my back gently. "I'm here now."

"You are and you're not." I pulled back an inch, resting my forehead against his. "You were so angry and so passionate back then. Bold and confident, too. You were annoying and you rushed into things without thinking about them. That's why… I miss you. Even though I'm falling in love with you now, it's hard to let all of that history go. I want you to remember so badly, Eren."

Eren stroked my hair in that reassuring way of his. "It's already starting. Last night I had dreams of titans, and the first time I saw you. It's a little bit fuzzy but you were beautiful, Levi. God, you were like an angel."

I shook my head. "I was a killer."

"A beautiful one." He paused for a moment, and then forced me to meet his eyes. "You know, I still have a quick temper. I'm still passionate and determined. People said that I could get into this college, and I worked really hard to prove them wrong. That soldier… Is still in me, somewhere."

I tried not to get distracted by the thought of him annoyed. I never, ever thought I would miss it. "You don't have to be just like him. I'm different too, you know. This is who we are, free from all of the angst and tragedy in that life. And I like that. I like you."

He gave me that angelic smile that I loved so much. "I like you, too." His eyes sparkled with mischief as he tugged at my collar. "Something tells me you haven't always been this soft."

"Something tells me that you should shut up," I returned, but I couldn't help but smile as he wrinkled his nose at me. "You're right about that one. I'm still pretty stoic right now, but in our other life, I didn't smile until you came around."

"You felt though." He took my hand and squeezed it. "I know you did. You felt more than any of us, you just didn't always show it."

That's what broke all of those lingering walls. I nearly sighed in relief. Eren. He just got me, no matter what, even if I shouted at him. He always got me to break down and let it out, holding me and whispering sweet things until I calmed down. "I love that about you."

He trailed kisses down my neck, softly and sweetly, unbuttoning my shirt almost fully before pausing at my collarbone. "Tell me more about this Erwin."

I almost whined. What was this kid doing to me? Didn't he know by now that my neck was sensitive? I shifted onto his lap, fiddling with the buttons on his shirt. "I don't want to talk…"

Eren blushed, taking in the look on my face. He shifted uncomfortably, his eyes flickering around the room. "I told you, you can't tease me, Levi."

"I'm not teasing. I'm ready now." I gazed at his tousled hair, flushed cheeks, sleepy eyes, and wrinkled shirt. Why did his sweetness turn me on so much?

Eren took a deep breath, his eyes wide, observing me the same way I was looking at him. He kissed me then, passionately and angrily, and I knew how much he had been holding back. To see him lose control was dead sexy.

I pushed him down, ravaging his lips while my hands roamed over his body. He was the one to break away, breathing heavily. It was already too much, but then he whined, "Corporal…"

And it took my breath away to see him panting, his hair tangled and his eyes clouded with lust, with that name on his lips. It felt surreal, and it hit me in that moment how much I loved him. Every version of him, whether he was an angry soldier or a thoughtful artist, and all of the shades in between. "Hey, Eren-"

Of course, he had other things on his mind. "Corporal, hurry," he protested, yanking me down to his lips again. Our bodies moved together perfectly, beautifully, as always. He was absolutely desperate today, and I couldn't wait to-

The phone rang, breaking that train of thought. I glanced at it, not wanting to ignore a phone call, but Eren was arching his back and his little sighs and moans were driving me insane and the damn phone rang again.

Groaning, I pulled away from him. He watched me like a betrayed puppy as I answered. I held his hand to keep some contact between us. It was Erwin, of all people. "Why are you calling me?"

There was a moment of silence on the other end. Both Hanji and Erwin were used to my personality, but being outright cold wasn't normal. "Are you alright? You sound really breathless."

Of course I sound breathless, dumbass, I was about to have sex. "I'm fine. Please answer quickly. I have to go soon."

"I was just wondering about Christmas, if you wanted to spend it together like usual." Eren, somehow managing to hear our conversation, scowled at me. I tightened my grip on his hand. "With Hanji of course."

There was a knowing tone to his voice, and I could just feel his smirk. "I might have some other plans, but yeah. Definitely. Can I please call you later? Now is really not a good time."

"Have fun with Eren." He was definitely, definitely smirking right now.

"I hate you." I snapped the phone shut, gazing at Eren's face once more. He didn't attack me immediately like I expected him to. He didn't look irritated, but there wasn't any happiness in those pretty eyes either.

He ran a hand through his hair. "Tell me about Erwin. I mean it this time. Don't distract me."

"You were the one that distracted me, with all of that neck kissing." I let out a long sigh. "There has never been anything between Erwin and I. But you were always extremely jealous because we had to spend a lot of time together, and because we shared cigarettes. You always hated that."

Eren grimaced at that. "Was he in love with you?"

I scoffed. Erwin, in love with me? No chance in hell. "He's incredibly straight."

"I thought I was incredibly straight," he mumbled. This kid.

"No." I pulled him closer to me, leaning my forehead against his. It made me strangely happy to see that he still cared enough to get jealous. "I think I can prove that you are the opposite of incredibly straight."

And I would have, if Mikasa hadn't called him a nanosecond later and thrown a temper tantrum about how he was never home and he needed to do more school work.

I attempted to lecture Eren, but he broke me off with kisses, murmuring, "I know," and "don't worry," between them. We got pretty carried away until she called again, and then we forced ourselves to get off of the couch and put our shirts back on. Oh, he was so needy and I planned on taking advantage of that the second I got a chance.

He left me with a kiss that left my lips burning, and then he was on his way. And I was falling in love with this balance between us, between my angst and his raging hormones, and the innocent love that kept us together no matter what.

I would never stop missing the boy from my dreams. As I had talked to Eren, I'd accepted that. I'd also accepted that I was falling completely in love with him all over again. Sex between us wasn't something insignificant. It wasn't just because of hormones, it was because we'd waited years to find each other again, even if we didn't know it. Because he brightened my life and all I wanted was to brighten his.

It mattered to me because I knew that he was serious, and he wouldn't run off and leave me for someone else. I knew that I would never force him to stay with me, but it was no coincidence that we'd found each other again.

And most of all, I knew that one day, his memories would return and he would run to me with open arms, and the artist and the soldier would bleed together like ink and watercolor.