CHAPTER 4
Kid's heels clicked against the deserted floor of the Death Weapon Meister Academy. Students had begun their two-week winter break yesterday, although certain key individuals-Spartoi among them-were on-call and had to keep track of their pocket mirrors for any messages received from Lord Death.
Well, not quite from Father, Kid thought, as he entered the door that opened upon a bright blue sky and a set of guillotines marking the path from the DWMA proper and through the alternate dimension leading to the Death Chamber. After all, the Death Scythe of East Asia, Azusa Yumi, was on monitor duty this month, having lost her bet to Maka's father. Despite himself, Kid smiled: at least this visit to his father had one award waiting for him, just to see the torture Spirit Albarn had inflicted upon her.
And evidently, it was an award awaiting Black Star, too. The ninja had managed for once to suppress his natural desire to shout his presence at the Academy, if only because, with so few students and teachers on campus, what was the point of advertising his arrival to an empty house? As the door shut behind Kid, Black Star, with quiet footsteps, sprinted to the entrance, pushed himself as much against the slim door opening before it shut, and dashed behind the first guillotine.
Kid paused, feeling a breeze hit him, and glanced back behind him. He must have felt the wind, he thought. He glanced above to see the clouds above him, moving through the sky. Still, it would not hurt to confirm: he closed his eyes, trying to sense any soul present. Feeling nothing, he frowned, turned back, and continued walking.
Black Star quietly exhaled. He was happy that he had managed to slow his resonance rate just enough that Kid could not sense him. He smiled widely, happy to have tricked the Grim Reaper himself: Tsubaki's lessons were helping after all!
"Kid!"
Black Star's smile disappeared, as he pressed himself against the guillotine upon hearing Lord Death's voice boom through the floor and up to the tip of his hair. Why did he sound so upset?!
"Father! I-I'm sorry to bother you!"
"You should be!"
What had gotten into him, Kid wondered, seeing that his father had reverted to his older visage.
"Who gave you the right to smuggle from my private stock?"
Kid blinked, frowned, then stamped his foot. "For the last time, I did not take through your eggnog!"
Black Star risked looking around the guillotine. Did he really just hear the Grim Reaper whining about eggnog?
"Oh!" Lord Death said, returning to his usually high-pitched voice. "Huh, my mistake. Azusa! Mark Kid off my eggnog enemy's list, please!"
"As you wish, Lord Death."
Kid struggled to keep a straight face, even before looking up to see the Death Scythe of East Asia. Yes, he thought with glee, she is still wearing it!
Azusa Yumi was dressed in a frightening neon green sweater, with a purple Christmas tree adorning it-and tiny LED lights adorning said tree-as well as a bulbous blinking Rudolph red nose on her face, and a purple elf's hat. As she walked away from the numerous monitors she had brought with her from her local office headquartered in Tokyo and towards Kid, the bells attached to her elf shoes jingled.
Kid snorted.
"Is there something amusing, young reaper?" Azusa said, her glasses reflecting the blue sky's light upon Kid-and then reflecting the red glow of her nose onto him as well.
"No, Death Scythe," Kid said, resuming his serious demeanor. "I am here to deposit this soul with you, Father, courtesy of Death Scythe Eater." He dropped the green sappy soul into his father's foam mitts. It was then that Kid recognized the asymmetrical mess, desperately wiping his offending hand clean with his handkerchief.
"Ooh! How colorful!" Lord Death replied, bouncing the ball between his hands. "And sappy! Tree monster?"
"Abies insanus, to be exact." Kid turned back to Azusa. "I trust you have finalized my mission parameters with Kristopher, then?"
A second snort echoed through the hallway, as all three turned to check the hallway. Black Star again squeezed behind the nearest guillotine, smacking his forehead for risking a glance at Azusa's ridiculous attire. While Kid and Lord Death glanced at each other and shrugged, Azusa sighed. That dumb kid, she thought: evidently Tsubaki's lessons were not working at all. In any case, she thought, she had best conclude the discussion before she had two children falling into hysterics.
"Now Kid, did you finish the paperwork from your previous missions?"
Kid glanced away momentarily. "Yes, although Liz did much of the work."
Azusa looked back from the hallway. "Was it only your mission files that she was signing off on? She did not go through any additional documents, did she?"
"No, no-I'm relatively sure," Kid lied. "Patty was with her-you can ask her."
While Azusa was credulous, Lord Death shouted, "Well, that's good enough for me!" He then lowered his voice. "Now Kid, you do understand your mission, right?"
"Yes, Father," Kid replied, as he accepted the file folder handed to him by the Death Scythe, as she directed him:
"You are to wait at the west balcony of the Academy. Kristopher will be there with his alternative ride."
Kid scrutinized her. "So, it is true: he really lost all of them?"
"Kristopher will be pursuing alternative transportation, at least until the two of you neutralize the threat."
He narrowed his eyes. "I would hardly call them threats. The goal is to save them, not kill them."
"Kid," Lord Death began. "We cannot risk another Kishin. You know this."
Black Star pricked up an ear. Another Kishin? Seriously? Is that what Kid is getting Liz and Patty as a last-minute Christmas gift? No, Black Star kicked himself, that's just stupid: who would he find dumb enough to gift-wrap a Kishin at this late hour?
Kid sighed. "I understand, Father." As he turned to head down the hallway, he said over his shoulder, "But believe me: with who you have assigned for this mission, I can assure you that all of them will be returned to Kristopher, alive."
Despite herself, Azusa smiled. "Good luck, Kid."
"Same to you, Rudolph!" Kid shouted, before running like mad before the all-seeing Death Scythe's glare could penetrate him.
"This is the last time I bet against Spirit on anything!"
"It could have been worst, Zu-Zu," Lord Death said. "Remember what he made you and Marie do when you were in your senior year at the Academy?"
Azusa's face reddened. "How did you know about that?!"
Lord Death began to whistle innocently, as he twiddled the thumbs on his foam hands. Meanwhile, from behind the guillotine, Black Star watched Kid depart down the hallway. So, Kid wasn't even shopping for his weapons-it was what Liz feared, that Kid would rather fulfill Daddy's request than help his own weapons! And he was going to take on a mission and tear apart some potential Kishin, outshining a god like him, the almighty assassin Black Star? That asshole! Hardly caring now whether anyone saw him, Black Star took off running to catch up with Kid-not that his visible presence mattered, Lord Death too busy cowering as Azusa proceeded to rip him a new one for his gossip. The Grim Reaper would have taken Azusa's tirade more seriously, if bells did not jingle every time Azusa stamped her feet while walking closer and closer to him.
o-o-o
She passed the last few feet before the ground would descend into the Avenue below. The height provided her with a relatively safe point where she would not be seen, even with the bright moon out, its blood-drenched smile visible on any clear night no matter where one was on this planet. She removed the binoculars from her backpack and checked the first building.
It was as she feared: eight of them, their rotting flesh dripping blood onto the dirt. Yet something was off about them: one wore glasses. Since when did a corpse have problems seeing, she asked. I mean, besides the fact that if they're dead they probably lost brain functions and hence can't-She shook her head: no time for those questions. Then again, she thought, she could spy another one wearing what had to have been Spanish colonial armor—fifteenth- or sixteenth-century, she imagined-and really, that would not fit the reports Rupert handed her. And….was that other one wearing a luchador mask?!
She smacked her forehead. Of course she would be stuck with a loony mission. She could never be assigned a typical undead army to exterminate: she was had to be stuck in a scenario more suitable to, say, Egyptian tombs. She wanted to yell at the undead beasts that they had picked the wrong pyramids to occupy.
She silenced her thoughts. Kami lowered her binoculars and replaced them into her backpack. She checked for her weapons: a rifle with a scope (she was happy that she remembered to remove the ammo from it first), some kunai, and a butterfly knife. She opted for the machete, as she removed its sheathe.
She sighed, as she tossed the weapon in her hands for some quick motor-memory practice: it just did not feel the same-a cold, dead weapon, no soul in it. And she really liked scythes, too-they were just a lot more fun for dodging and blocking. Yet the parameters had said it was best to dismember the targets so that, if possible, their individual parts could be returned to the Academy for study. She cringed, really not liking the idea of giving Stein something else to experiment upon.
As she replaced the other weapons into her knapsack, her wallet fell out, and of course it just had to open up on a the photographs she kept in there: an older image of her and her daughter, from which she had removed her ex-husband, and a new one she took earlier this year-a family portrait, as she was convinced by her darling daughter to tolerate Spirit long enough to sit for a snapshot.
At least he was still cute, she thought-and not quite as bad a father as he used to be.
"If I die, Spirit," she said to herself, "you had better protect Maka-or I swear, I will come back from the dead myself and freaking end you."
She stood, and slid down the hill, her boots kicking up dirt alerting her presence to the monsters milling below.
WRITER'S NOTES
This is my first attempt writing Azusa—and I make her the butt of a joke, repeatedly, in this fic, so that robs her of some depth. I'm still determining how to properly portray her. At least I enjoy the image of her as essentially the loser in an ugly sweater contest, and whatever happened with "Zu-Zu" and Marie when they were younger.
I'm not sure I like the idea of Kami still finding Spirit attractive: on the one hand, I think that the two were in love with each other, and I think it is realistic that lingering feelings could persist; on the other hand, after what Spirit did, I am not a fan of Kami ever re-marrying him, nor do I want her to come off as so shallow, especially when her daughter is going to be her top priority.
I drop more hints as to why I gave certain names to Kami's opponents. That story continues, if not in the next chapter, then in a few chapters later. But first, the story has to show how her story all the way in the Avenue of the Dead relates to what is going on in Death City.
Lord Death having an obsession with eggnog is not my idea: I am alluding to a video by Soul Eater Academy on YouTube (/watch?v=qml3mc0zxn0), and to the comic Chip and Walter by illustrator John "Dub" Gray, in which the villain had a similar unhealthy addiction to the beverage. Gray's artwork and stories are a delightfully chaotic blending of the styles of Carl Banks, Jeff Smith, Chuck Jones, and others. Gray has since worked on Disney comics and Sonic the Hedgehog at Archie Comics—and his artwork is worth the price to check it out. You can find more of Dub's work at DeviantArt, user name jongraywb.
Next chapter: Back to Gallows Mansion to see how Soul and the others wrap up their gift preparations.