OMG! OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!! This had been such a success! I've had like six reviews and I've had it up for about two days or something! Yayayayay! Me sos happys!
But still, I have to lay down some rules. This is the order of owner ship when it comes to hellsing guys:
DopeyTheChosen1's Boys:
Alucard
Schrodinger
Luke
Tomo Zabac's Boys:
Anderson
Pip
Jan
Okay? Now that that's figured out, on with the story!!
(we don't OWN them when it comes to copyright stuff)
CHAPTER TWO: REVERTED, CONVERTED, WHATEVER! ALL THAT MATTERS IS THE FACT THAT HE'S ON OUR SIDE NOW!
-
So, here I was, preparing to educate a Nazi on Hitler. Wtf! It makes you wonder what goes on in his tiny little head… either that or you wonder what goes on in MY tiny little head. It's okay, admit it, I'm used to it.
"Okay," I said, pacing back and forth. "Nazi… You don't know anything about Hitler, the guy who made up this whole Nazi trend, so I'm gonna educate you. Adolf Hitler was the guy who—"
"I thought you were gonna educate me on Hitler. Is Adolf Hitler his cousin?" Schrodinger asked.
"NO! Adolf is his first name, everyone just calls him by his last name! Jeeze! Anyway, he was the guy responsible for the murder of millions of innocent people! He was crazy! He wanted to rule the whole world."
"Like ve do."
"Yeah, but you really do? If your boss rules the whole world, he'll rule you, too."
"Oh, damn."
"Anyway, and he was a real coward too. When the Americans were coming to get him, he shot himself at the last second."
"Americans?"
"Yeah," I raised an eyebrow. "A-Mer-E-Cans. Me, where you are now."
"I'm in an American?"
"No, you're in AmericA."
"Oh,"
"Do you get anything of what I'm saying?"
"That this Hitler guy vho started the Nazi foundation was a real sicko ass."
"EXACTLY! And how doest that make you feel?" I thought I was really on the verge of a breakthrough.
The werewolf shrugged. "Indifferent."
"WHAT!??!" I couldn't help myself. I exploded on the poor guy. That was the longest lecture of my LIFE, and he didn't give a damn! "THAT WAS THE LONGEST LECTURE OF MY LIFE AND YOU DON'T GIVE A DAMN!? BESIDES THAT FACT, YOU SHOULD BE DISGUSTED WITH YOURSELF!"
"I…I…" I backed off. It looked like the guy was going to cry. That would be a first. He hung his head and murmured, "I am ashamed."
"Well, like hell yeah!" I cheered. "So, you gonna give up being a Nazi?" Okay, so maybe I DIDN'T back off.
"YUP!" Good, he wasn't crying after all. Ripping of his swastika he threw it on the ground and stomped on it.
"GOOD CALL!" I yelled, giving him the thumbs up.
I was about to hug him again, but snapped out of it when I heard gun fire, so instead we totally missed each other and fell to the ground.
"Give you one guess," Schrödinger shrugged.
"Alucard," I said and we followed the sound of the gun.
-H-
"Lovely," I said with sarcasm. "You fire, what, three shots, and you cover half the store in blood," I patted him on the arm, said, "Good job, diphead," and jumped away as he tried to bite me.
"Not my fault," the vampire shrugged, then his eye seemed to twitch when he noticed my new friend. "WHAT is HE doing HERE?"
"Oh, yeah, I reverted him to our side."
"I think you mean CONverted," Integra said.
"Reverted, converted, whatever! All that matters is the fact that he's on our side now! What were you shooting at anyway?"
"That…thing over there," the vampire said, pointing to a very much mangled pile on the floor.
"Oh well," I shrugged. "I don't think that's anything to worry about."
-H-
It was some time later that we realized the Wal-mart was deserted. Which was cool in my book. We were causing total havoc in there—running around, sliding on the floor. We even hooked up a garden hose to a faucet in the bathroom and got a slip-n-slide going. Yes, I know, we were all dead in the morning. But who cares? As long as we could get out before then, huzzah! Huzzah!
"Man," Pip whined after going on the slip-n-slide. "I got my uniform soaked."
"We're in a freakin' store, dill head," I said, rolling my eyes. "You could have jacked a pair of shorts, you know." That's what I had done. I grabbed a swim top and a pair of shorts. Both black because it was winter then and they didn't have anything else in stock.
"Oh no you don't," I said, backhanding Alucard as he was trying to spray a canister of carbon dioxide on everything. "That's the stuff that makes everything with water on it freeze, right?"
"Eh…maybe."
After he went away, I ran and slid into the warm water. Warm? Before it had been HOT. That must mean that the water heater is running out of energy or something, I thought as I lay in a kiddy pool that was hooked up also. Suddenly, the water was freezing cold! My first thought was that Alucard had something to do with it.
Following the hose to the guys' bathroom, I opened the door to see that the water had indeed been switched around to cold. But who would've done it? Alucard wanted to freeze us, not make us freeze. Wait…whatever, you know what I mean right?
"Hey!" Someone yelled at me. Turning around I saw Pip in the doorway. "What did you do? The water's all cold!"
"What? You didn't notice that before?" I asked, eyebrow raised.
"Well, I was getting these shorts, Integra was nowhere to be seen, Alucard and Seras are vampires, so they wouldn't feel it," he said, counting off the names on his fingers. "Why do I feel like I'm forgetting someone?"
"Poochy."
"Who?"
"Schrodinger."
"Oh yeah, the Nazi kid is in the pet aisle raiding the dog food supply. So I don't think that it was any of us."
"But that would mean that someone else is in the store!"
"Yeah…" Pip thought a minute.
"Don't waste time," I said as I ran off to find Integra. "Thinking isn't one of your strengths."
After searching about half the store for Sir Hellsing, and not finding her anywhere, I decided what the hell. We probably just used up all the hot water or something. Coming down the pet isle I was welcomed with a shower of dog food that got all over me.
"Thank you," I muttered to Schrodinger. "Do you know anything about what's been going on here? The water's ice-cold. I think someone's been messing with us."
"Oh yeah!" Schrodinger's ears went up. "I remember now! I saw some other guy in the toy section of the store!"
"And you didn't tell me that earlier?"
"Apparently not," the werewolf returned to the shelf he was going through. "I didn't think it was wery important, this store is public, isn't it?"
"Oh, yeah, it is…BUT WE'RE HERE AFTER HOURS, DILLHEAD!"
"Oh…"
"C'mon, Poochy," I said, grabbing his hand. "Show me where you saw him."
Schrodinger led me in a beeline through the store until we came to the toy area. Though we couldn't see anyone from our hideout behind the legos and bionicles, we could see a shadow moving in the only aisle that was pink. So my first instinct told me there was a girl messing around with us.
"You ready to move in?" I whispered. Schrodinger nodded. He went to one end of the aisle and I went to the other. Moving towards each other, I thought we almost had the mysterious figure captured when—My feet decided to slip on a wet patch of blood and send me crashing into the comic books.
"CRAAAAAAAAP!" I tried to regain my balance but the blood was everywhere so I kept on slipping. It's sort of like those little kid movies where the bad guy gets trapped in a pile of syrup or marbles or something and they can't move.
Though it wasn't planned, it sidetracted the mysterious person(s) and gave the werewolf a chance to jump on him/her/it.
The two were wrestling around when I finally got back up, so I decided that I had better break it up and see who we were dealing with. I started grabbing random barbie dolls off the shelves and chucked them at the combatants. Schrodinger got the hint and decided to get away, but slipped on some MORE blood.
"AHAHAHAHA!" I jumped when I grabbed a tickle me elmo doll. I quickly discarded it and saw that Schrodinger had gotten away. Now I could see who it was.
"Oh my GOD," I whined. "What the FUCK are YOU doing here?"
It was none other than Alexander Anderson of the Vatican Section XIII Iscariot.
Okay, there you go. Now I thought I'd mention what my character looks like. She actually looks just like me, tall, thin (I mean as in fit, not skinny) with blue eyes and short blonde hair. Oh, and if my skin was any paler I would be see through. I don't tan, I burn. I'm like the whitest kid in my class…on day this tan kid named Harley came up behind me playing 'White And Nerdy' on his iPod and put the earbuds in my ears.
Oh oh oh, aannnddd sorry if i didn't get any of the accents right, i'm too lazy to go through it and fix them. use your imagination.