I do not own Lilo and Stitch.

Requested by selene-rose.

The Experiment Chasing Mishap

"Jumba!" Lilo hollered as she burst into the house. Her backpack full of homework already forgotten, she tossed it near the door and hurried for Jumba's room. "Jum—"

The rest of her uncle's name died on her tongue. She stared in fear at Stitch, who was sitting in a cylindrical container on Jumba's desk. He slouched against the glass, his eyes half-lidded and his fur a shade paler.

"Stitch!" She dashed forward and pressed her small hands against the glass. "What's wrong?"

"No need to be panicking," Jumba assured the girl as he adjusted the dials attached to the device. "626 developed ailment while Little Girl was at school. I am expecting he ingested something that is not agreeing with genetic material. Jumba will be running some tests to diagnose 626."

"I guess that means he can't help me catch the cousin," Lilo said with a sigh.

"What evil creation is wreaking havoc on puny island this time?" asked Jumba, intrigued.

"I saw her on the bus ride home. She turned a bench into a big slab of ham!"

Jumba laughed. "That would be Experiment 024. She is designed to turn objects into pork, ceasing all functionality and causing complete chaos across galaxy! Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

Lilo rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "Then I'm gonna name her Hamlette."

"Stitch can help," insisted Stitch, his voice weak and tired.

"626 cannot be helping," countered Jumba, lightly tapping his knuckles against the container. "626 will be staying here until he is back at one hundred percent power."

"It's okay, Stitch! I can handle this one," Lilo said with a smile. She kissed the place on the glass where his nose was and went for Jumba's closet, where he kept all his weapons.

"Blaster with net cartridge in box under Pleakley's bathrobe," said Jumba, his attention returning to his computer, which displayed Stitch's health data. "Do not be thinking of taking plasma blaster."

"I know, I know." Lilo grabbed the harmless weapon from the closet. "If I'm not home by dinner, can you come rescue me from Gantu?"

"Eh, Jumba will have to think about it."

Lilo ignored his joke and dashed out the room, intent on finding Hamlette before the Big Dummy.

...

But Stitch wasn't the only one suffering from illness.

"Ugh," Gantu moaned, clutching his aching stomach. "Blasted Earth expiry dates!"

"I told you to check the date of the sour cream before making that salad," 625 said with a smirk as he lounged on his bunk.

The video screen in the main compartment of the ship beeped, signalling an incoming call. Gantu groaned and pressed his pillow over his face. "Not now!"

"Gantu!" Hamsterviel screeched as the screen moved into the room. "What are you doing, you lazy pile of uselessness?! There are experiments to be caught!"

"I'm not feeling well," Gantu protested.

"Oh, poor Gantu. I don't care how you are feeling! Just bring me my experiments or else!"

The video feed cut off and Gantu sighed heavily. He tried getting up, but his lurching stomach promptly sent him collapsing back into bed. Even if he went out experiment hunting, he wouldn't stand a chance against the trog and the Earth girl in his current condition.

"625—"

625 crossed his furry arms. "If you're gonna ask me to go hunt down 024, you better forget about it."

"It's not like you help catch those blasted experiments all the time!" Gantu snapped.

"What's in it for me?" 625 demanded. "I'm going to be spending valuable sandwich-making time searching for another one of Jumba's creations. Make it worth my while."

"I owe you a favour, all right?" said Gantu in exhaustion, wanting nothing more than to sleep.

625 tapped his chin. "Deal. I'll see you later, Blubber Butt. Try not to vomit on the blankets. They were just washed."

...

With her net blaster hidden in her backpack, Lilo searched for Experiment 024. She didn't have to look too hard, thanks to the trail of differently-shaped chunks of ham. She brightened when she finally came upon the pork-coloured alien, who was in the process of turning a mailbox into a slab of ham.

"Hamlette!"

Spooked by the cry, Hamlette sprinted down the road. Lilo took up pursuit, wrangling the net gun from her bag. "Wait! I'm not going to hurt you!"

As Hamlette ran through the intersection located in the heart of town, 625 appeared from the left. His eyes locked on his fellow experiment and he ran after her, albeit at a much slower place. Lilo frantically darted her gaze along the skyline, but the looming form of Gantu did not appear.

Lilo furrowed her brow, puzzled, for it was rare for 625 to experiment hunt by himself. "Hey!" she shouted. "Leave your cousin alone!"

"Sorry, sister!" 625 hollered over his shoulder. "I got an annoying hamster jerk that won't lay off my butt and a giant fish face that will never let me hear the end of it if I come back empty-handed."

It did not take long for Lilo to catch up to the panting, lazy experiment. 024 climbed a fence and Lilo easily scaled it, leaving 625 to curse in his native tongue. Lilo recognized the words, for Stitch and Jumba had uttered them a few times, but neither had ever saw fit to explain to her exactly what they meant.

"Language!" she teased as she swung herself over the top of the fence and dropped down to the other side.

She ran after 024, sweeping her gaze around her surroundings. Dozens of storage units were arranged in neat rows. She ducked down one of the rows, winding her way down the dirt path, hoping to cut 024 off.

"A-ha!" she said triumphantly, jumping out in front of Hamlette. "Hi, Hamlette!"

Panicked, Hamlette broke into the unit closest to her, disappearing inside. Lilo hastily hurried after her. She looked around at the stacked boxes and wardrobe racks. "Hamlette? You can come out. I'm going to help you."

Something solid slammed into her back and the eight-year-old squeaked with surprise. "Hey!"

"Where is she?" demanded 625.

"She's not here," lied Lilo.

625 snorted. "Suuuure. You're just standing here because you feel like it." He prowled amongst the boxes and bins, squinting into the shadows. "All right, cuz, come on out. I've got someone who wants to meet you."

"Don't listen to him!" insisted Lilo, pushing aside the plastic-protected clothes and peering behind the rack. "He's evil."

"Duh," drawled 625. "I'm an evil illegal genetic experiment made by an evil genius."

"Bahahahaha!"

The two whirled around, eyes wide at the sight of Hamlette standing back at the door, grinning wickedly at them. She slammed the door shut and Lilo charged forwards. She yanked on the doorknob, but Hamlette had locked them in.

"Great," she said with a huff, dropping onto the hard earth floor. "We're stuck."

Without the sunlight pouring through the open door, they were in complete darkness. "Doesn't this place have lights?" asked 625.

"Don't you have night vision?" returned Lilo.

"Yeah, but I don't like using it. Hurts my eyes," quipped 625. "Kinda like your face."

Lilo grit her teeth as 625 cackled at his own joke. She stood and moved slowly across the floor, bumping into the edges of boxes, until she came to the wall. She felt along it, her fingertips dragging along cement, until she hit the light switch.

The room erupted with light. 625 took his first proper look at his surroundings. "What is this place? It looks like Gantu's closet."

"We're in one of the storage units." Lilo knelt down to read the writing on the side of one of the boxes. "Looks like this one belongs to Kokaua Town Theater Group."

"Anything that'll help us get out?"

"Probably not," Lilo answered. "I think they just keep props and costumes here, not tools. But you've got super strength. Can't you just break down the door? Or the wall?"

625 shrugged. "I just make sandwiches, kid."

"Right," said Lilo with a sigh.

"You got any way to call for help?"

"Nope. You?"

"Nope."

"Then I guess we'll just have to wait," said Lilo, kicking at the floor. "I told Jumba to come rescue me from Gantu if I wasn't back by dinner. He'll come looking for me in about two hours."

"I'm overjoyed," deadpanned 625. "Really, I am."

Lilo ignored him. With a lack of anything better to do, she went snooping in the boxes. She rifled through scripts, old fabrics and set designs. She found a box of kitchen props and she pulled out an ice cream machine.

"Cool!"

625 raised a brow. "Do you even know how to use one of those?"

"Sure! You just pour the ice and the cream in this nozzle, and you crank it like so—ouch!"

A few strands of her long hair had fallen into the gears without her noticing. As she spun the lever, her hair was sucked painfully between the pieces of metal. 625 gave a bark of laughter. "You can get into trouble with anything, can't you?"

"Help me!" Lilo whined.

Shaking his head, 625 carefully pried the chunk of hair from the rusted gears. "There. I saved your life. Now you owe me."

"Do you ever stop making jokes?" Lilo asked, gingerly running her fingers through her hair.

"Nah. It's how I keep life interesting."

Lilo pulled a brush out of her backpack and tried to tackle the knots that had formed from being tangled in the ice cream machine. She pulled and pulled, but she couldn't get them to smooth out. Lifting her eyes to 625, Lilo said moodily, "If you're just gonna stare, you might as well help."

"Excuse me?" 625 asked flatly.

"What else are you gonna do?"

The kid had a point. Heaving a sigh, 625 snagged the brush and stood behind the girl. "This ain't exactly something Jumba programmed into me."

625 brushed out her knots and started to braid her hair. "You can braid?" said in Lilo surprise, starting to shift her head.

"Stay still. Yeah, I can braid. You learn things from watching the tube all day. Don't spread it around."

For a while, they sat in comfortable silence, as 625's fingers threaded Lilo's hair together. When he finished, Lilo had a perfect braid dangling down her back, held together by rubber bands 625 had found in her backpack. She beamed. "Thanks! I love it!"

625 found himself smiling at her cheer. "Weird way to spend an afternoon, huh?"

"Really weird," agreed Lilo. "Even for us."

A soft growling suddenly sounded from outside the door. Whatever it was started banging against the wall, causing the entire building to shake. 625 yelped and took cover beneath an old, ripped leather saddle. "I'm not here right now!"

Lilo seized a frying pan, wielding it with one hand and her net blaster with the other. "Who's there?" she demanded.

Bang!

The door exploded from its hinges, landing heavily on the floor with a resounding crash. Lilo grinned at the sight of two familiar figures standing in the doorframe. "Jumba! Richter!"

"Lilo!" said Richter happily.

She dashed forwards to give him a hug. "You found us!"

Jumba chuckled, relieved that the girl was unharmed. "Little Girl did not come home for dinner, so Jumba went looking. 513 was happy to be offering assistance."

"How did you know we were here?"

"Quite easy to follow trail of pork-transformed Earth objects," said Jumba in amusement. "When trail ended, 513 followed Little Girl's scent."

"Is Stitch gonna be okay without you?" asked Lilo worriedly.

"Pleakley is perfectly capable of taking care until evil genius returns."

"Hate to interrupt this little reunion, but I am done with this place," spoke 625, crawling out from his hiding place. He brushed the dirt and dust from his fur and wrinkled his nose. "It's been a time. I'll remember it always."

Richter growled, his back arching in a threatening manner. Lilo patted his head. "It's okay, Richter. We can let him go."

"Ah, 625," said Jumba with a laugh. "So lazy he will not even be breaking down a simple door."

"Hey, do you know how much effort that takes? You took care of it for me. I call that a win. Later, sister."

625 scampered off, ducking under Jumba's legs. Lilo started to call out her own farewell before realizing that 625 did not have his own name, and it felt strange for her to call him by merely a number.

"Come, Little Girl," said Jumba, fondly ruffling her hair. "I am sure 625 is not going to be seeking 024 further. Let us find 024 so we can be going home."

"That sounds great," said Lilo. "Want to help us find Hamlette, Richter?"

Richter nodded cheerfully and the trio set off. They returned to the main road and as they passed by a diner, Lilo spotted an advertisement for Reuben sandwiches.

Hmm...Reuben. I'll have to try and remember that one.