Hello. Haha exams are over! Thanks MitchiMarra, Envyyyyy and Gen for reviewing :D Love you guys! Here's the next chapter. Haha.

As much as he disliked attending classes, Deidara preferred them to weekends. Saturdays and Sundays were a drag. He had nothing to do and nowhere to go. Even if he had something to do, he had no one to spend the time with.

The last week he had run out of clay. Sasori had been busy with his homework and refused to accompany him to the nearest DIY store. Deidara had tried everything. He bribed him, he praised him, he even offered to buy the redhead coffee, but Sasori hadn't budged.

"Look, I'll be good and go to every class this week."

"That's what you should be doing."

"I'll... do my homework, un. Every single one."

"What you should do everyday."

"I'll do the laundry, un!"

"As always, originally your job."

"Why don't you just—"

"No."

"Danna..."

"Shut up, brat. I said no, I won't go."

And so he had gone by himself.

He was up very early today. Too early. At least for a Saturday, eleven was way too early in the day to be out of bed. He'd tried going back to sleep, but tossing and turning hadn't helped.

Eventually the blonde stumbled out of the room into the bathroom. Sasori heard him and checked the clock, slightly impressed that he had made it out of bed. He stuck his head out of the kitchen when the shower started running.

The redhead leaned against the wall outside the kitchen, tapping his feet and looking at the seconds tick by on the wall clock. Deidara had been inside for quite some time now, and he never turned off the water anytime in between. Water bills…

Sauntering over to the heater, he flipped the switch up, smirking to himself as a string of familiar curses drifted from behind the door.

"It's a good way for you to wake up, brat," Sasori answered, not the least bothered about the angry blonde who would be stomping towards him with a towel wrapped around his waist...who never did. A little puzzled, he turned towards the bathroom. "Brat? Shouldn't you be trying to strangle me right about now?"

There was rustling and annoyed grumbling behind the door, and eventually the blonde slammed it open, glaring at Sasori.

"Will you stop doing that, un! It's going to give me a heart attack someday!"

"Even I don't think you're that weak in the heart," Sasori raised an eyebrow at the long sleeved shirt that Deidara was wearing. "You're actually wearing a shirt straight out of a shower. Good job, brat. Anyway, you need to hurry. The rest wants to meet for lunch. I was going to wake you up but," the redhead grinned, "good thing you got up on your own."

Deidara scowled, and dragged his feet into the kitchen, pulling his sleeves down lower. "When did they plan it?"

"About nine. When you were still snoring—"

"I do not snore, Danna." Deidara yanked open the fridge door, blinking before his lips quirked up into a smile. "What did you do to the milk, un?"

"It went on a long journey."

"Down the rubbish chute?"

"Smart. I knew you had it in you, brat."

The blonde drummed his fingers on the tempered glass shelves in the fridge and sighed, pulling out the juice. "They cost quite a lot, you know."

"My shirt probably caused more."

"That's why we have a washing machine, un!" Deidara stared at Sasori in brief disbelief. "Don't tell me you threw your shirt away."

"I didn't," the redhead narrowed his eyes at the blonde, as usual, astounded by his ridiculousness. "You have under an hour to do whatever it is you want to do, and we're leaving."

"Danna, we're due at one. It's eleven now. Why the heck do we need over an hour to get to town, un?"

"You never know what might happen and I don't like being late."

"This is just too exaggerated in my opinion, un."

"Brat, do you want me to kill you?"

"I'm good, thanks, un." Deidara twisted the cover off the juice box and gulped it down.

Sasori rolled his eyes and grabbed a croissant out of the plastic, walking towards the blonde. Deidara put the juice down in surprise as the redhead whacked his chest and stuffed the pastry into his mouth. He winced and took a bite. "Ow, un," he muttered.

"What? You've got a broken rib or something, brat?"

"No. How about it's because you hit me a little too hard, Danna?" Deidara finished the rest of the croissant and made a face. "I'll just be in my room, un."

Sasori watched the blonde walk away, pulling at his sleeves. Is the brat sick? He's being a little weird today.

The atmosphere was all wrong. Zetsu couldn't stand the awkwardness any more and picked up the menu, hiding behind the propped up laminate. Tobi caught on that something was wrong and didn't say a word, unusually quiet. Even Pein and Konan weren't all over each other, knowing that the timing was bad.

Itachi looked around and was about to make a comment when Deidara clapped a hand over his mouth, earning a startled squeak from Kisame. Sasori raised an eyebrow at the tall man's reaction.

"Hidan," the redhead finally said, and the silver haired man threw him his deadliest glare. "Don't take this the wrong way, but please tell us what the hell is wrong so we can start ordering the food. We've waited long enough."

"Why the fuck should I say it?" Hidan growled. "Ask the fucking bastard Kakuzu."

Sasori pleasantly ignored the vulgarities that spilled from the other's mouth and turned to Kakuzu, who was staring almost unblinkingly at the wall beside Sasori. "Kakuzu?"

"It's none of my business. I didn't do anything wrong. Ask the uncivilized idiot."

"Save your breath, Danna. Hidan must have nicked Kuzu's wallet, un."

"Okay, guys. Let's stop being all weird and order, all right?" Konan raised her hand and waved it to get the waitress's attention. "Everyone knows what they want, right?"

"Damn straight," Hidan stomped his foot. "I want Kakuzu's fucking head on a silver platter."

"Shut the fuck up before I tear your head off your shoulders."

"Let's see you try, you liar!"

"Who's the liar, you drunken—"

"Does Hidan-san want Kuzu-san's head on a platter the same silver as his hair?" Tobi piped in.

"Tobi, un, I advise you to keep your stupid mouth shut if you value your life."

Deidara was a little too late because Kakuzu's extraordinarily long hands were already throttling Tobi's neck.

"Kakuzu, I think he's going out soon," Kisame offered. "Maybe you should let him go..."

"Don't bother, Kisame." Itachi said, watching Zetsu try to save his roommate. "Nothing will stop him."

The waitress padded over and took in the bizarre scene, blinking twice before flashing an oblivious smile and asking for their orders.

Pein was impressed by her ability to compose herself, and chuckled silently to himself as he observed a bead of perspiration start to form at her temple, while she tried not to get pissed over the fact that everyone except Konan was ignoring her.

"Can I have spaghetti bolognaise with extra Parmesan cheese," Konan said tiredly. "And a coke."

The waitress nodded, glad to be of some service.

"The mushroom soup in bread bowl," Pein muttered.

Deidara frowned at the menu, unable to make up his mind. "Uh... How about... The uh, chicken chop with mashed potatoes." He flipped to the last page. "And apple juice, un. Extra gravy on the potatoes."

Sasori reached out and grabbed the menu from the startled blonde. "I'll have the egg sandwich and black coffee."

"Tobi wants cotton candy!"

"Sorry, sir. We don't have that here..." The waitress gave Tobi a questioning glance.

"Oh... Then Tobi wants fish and chips. And hot chocolate!"

"Caesar salad," Zetsu said.

"Grilled fish with herbed potatoes," Itachi looked up from the menu, ignoring Kisame's cringe. "And a latte."

"I think I'm just going to have the waffles with the double-scoop ice cream." Kisame muttered, the image of eating fish making his insides churn.

"Water," Kakuzu snapped shortly.

Everyone turned to look at Hidan. The flustered man threw them a dirty look. "What?"

"You haven't ordered, Hidan-san! Even Tobi ordered! Tobi is having—"

"Shut up," Hidan glanced through the menu. "Beef steak with wedges. And a Heineken—"

"No," Kakuzu interrupted. "He'll have a soda."

Hidan stared openmouthed at Kakuzu, hardly processing what just happened. The waitress repeated their orders and walked away, visibly breathing a sigh of relief.

"What did you do that for, Kuzu!"

"I said, no alcohol," Kakuzu narrowed his eyes at Hidan. "No. Not a single drop."

"What are you being such a fucking asshole for! Are you my grandmother?"

"No, I'm your roommate, and I am not living with a drunk who goes around licking people's blood—"

"Shut your fucking mouth before I break it!"

Hidan froze and glanced around the table, dread creeping into his chest when he realized that he had self admitted into doing exactly what Kakuzu had said. Fuck. I do not lick blood.

The other nine pairs of eyes were trained on the silver haired man. He felt his heart beat faster. I definitely do not lick blood... that's fucking disgusting. He tried to crack a sheepish smile, but it came out as an awkward baring of teeth.

"Yeah," Kakuzu was saying. "Break my jaw and lick my blood, why don't you? Idiot."

"I said I don't—"

"You were drunk, you weren't aware, right?" Pein sounded strangled, a little disturbed.

"Are you trying to say that I did lick Kuzu's blood!?"

"Do you have any proof of not doing so?" Itachi said in a monotone.

"Kakuzu doesn't have any proof of Hidan licking his blood either," Zetsu pointed out.

"Hidan licks blood when he's drunk, un?" Deidara stared at the silver haired man in obvious horror. "What the fuck, man."

"Kakuzu, are you sure—"

"I'm damn sure. The last time he got drunk, he punched me and licked my blood."

"That's bloody messed up," Kisame gasped. "Hidan!"

"That must be the reason why Hidan and Kakuzu made the whole mood so tensed just now." Sasori let out a sigh. "Kakuzu, maybe you should have kept that bit of information to yourself."

"It's disturbing. Why should I carry the burden alone?" Kakuzu scowled.

"Guys, just chill okay? And eat, quietly." Konan tapped the table to get their attention. "Seriously. It's awkward enough as it is."

"Konan is right," Pein added.

"Pein, Konan is always right to you," Zetsu muttered.

"Leave the love struck boy alone," Kisame shook his head.

Sasori surveyed the table with his usual drooping eyelids. I think I need normal friends.

"Let's get Hidan drunk and lock him in a room with Kuzu, un," Deidara suddenly said, a wide smile forming on his face, his sapphire eyes lighting up. "And then we'll solve this once and for all."

"Brat, if you value your life, I don't think—" Sasori broke off to slap away Kakuzu's hands, which were reaching for the blonde's throat.

"I'm serious, Danna!"

"I object," Kakuzu growled.

"I think I support Deidara's idea..." Kisame said.

"Me too." Zetsu grinned. "Who else? Raise your hands!"

There was four seconds of silence, and everyone except Kakuzu and Hidan raised their hand. Sasori hadn't wanted to, but Deidara had grabbed his hand and yanked it up into the air.

"Then, it's decided..."

Hidan wanted to dig a hole somewhere, crawl into it, and never come out again.

Kakuzu just wanted to throttle everyone.

Zetsu slammed the pack of six beer cans on the tabletop and looked up at Deidara, grinning. Pein and Konan hadn't come with them, because according to Konan, it was going to be "disastrous". But the rest had other ideas as to why they didn't want to spend any more time with them.

The blonde nodded and turned to Hidan. "All yours, un!"

"I. Said. No," Kakuzu hissed through gritted teeth. "Which part of the two alphabets N-O do you all not understand?"

"The fact that those two alphabets are side by side," Deidara answered, waving the seething man off.

"You son of a—"

"Please tell me again why we're doing this in my apartment," Itachi sighed. "To be honest, I'm not very agreeable to this—"

"Well, sorry for disturbing your private time with Kisame, but your apartment IS the biggest."

Kisame turned red. "Wh...what p...private time—"

"All right, un!" Deidara interrupted, shoving the pack of beer into Hidan's arms. "Drink up, old man!"

The silver haired man was too stunned to even react. "I..."

"Hidan, if you dare to drink even one can, I will—"

"Ignore Kuzu, Hidan! Drink them all, un!"

"Deidara." Kakuzu was ready to kill the blonde, who really couldn't care less.

"Senpai, look out!"

Deidara jumped away before Kakuzu could break his neck in half. "Chill, Kuzu, un!"

"Brat, I think I'm going home first. I don't want to know how this will turn out, and it's too noisy for my liking—"

"Danna, you can't leave now," the blonde grabbed the retreating redhead's shirt. "I swear it'll be funny, un."

"Hell no. Brat, let go—"

"Are you kidding, Sasori? Do you want the kid to get raped or something on the way back afterwards?" Zetsu raised an eyebrow but received no response. "Don't tell me you've forgotten the last time Deidara went home by himself in the middle of the night." Sasori stopped in mid step.

Deidara turned a shade of crimson. "What the fuck was that, Zetsu? Do you really think I can't defend myself, un? That time was different, I was drunk! You take that back or I'll disfigure you, un!"

"Deidara, even though you're a man, it's not obvious. Your hair totally makes you a girl." Zetsu turned to the frozen redhead. "Still leaving, Sasori?"

The redhead slowly turned around. "Brat, you come back with me now."

"No way, Danna. This is my plan, un."

Hidan stood with the pack of beer, completely forgotten, in the middle of the room. Inching his way to the side, he opened one and chugged the cool liquid down. He had been craving for alcohol since the day Kakuzu refused to let him enter a bar. The stingy bastard kept an eye on him 24/7 and it pissed him off.

He felt the need tone down as the alcohol penetrated his system. Obviously he didn't lick blood when he was drunk. Maybe he beat people up, but he would never do something that disgusting. And it wasn't as if he was completely unaware of his actions when he was drunk.

The bickering in the background faded as Hidan downed the next five cans. When the last can was empty, he shook the beer can and groaned. How did six cans of beer disappear so quickly?

"Hey, you fuckers over there, stop shouting and get me more beer!" Hidan waved the last empty can in the air and crushed it in his fist, slamming it down on the table.

Itachi and Kisame shook their heads, feeling the pain for their furniture. Zetsu and Deidara stopped trying to kill each other and turned to Hidan. Sasori lifted his head from the couch where he was sitting in and raised his eyebrow at the horrified Kakuzu. Tobi jumped up and down, clapping his hands. "Hidan-san finished the whole value pack! Tobi feels so amazed!"

"Sharrap, Tobi," Hidan slurred. "Get me more beer—"

Before they knew it, Deidara had grabbed Hidan by the back of his shirt and thrown the drunk man into Kisame's room, Zetsu tossing Kakuzu in after him. They closed the door and locked it with the spare key, holding onto the doorknob anyway because the door could be unlocked form the inside.

Kisame sat dumbfounded. "Guys... that's my room. You know that I'll never be able to repair my stuff again, right?"

"It's okay, Kisame. It's going to be worth it, un."

"Kisame is already having some mental problems, I suggest you try not to disturb his mind too much," Itachi added.

"I said I'm not crazy, Itachi," Kisame muttered. He had received a phone call from the hospital the day before, informing him that he had an appointment tomorrow at nine in the morning, and that he had to turn up at the psychiatry specialist department. His thoughts had immediately turned to Itachi. The bastard Uchiha must have made the appointment for him and given them his phone number. The bastard. The bastard. Kisame groaned and dropped his head into his hands. Why do I even like him?

"Don't forget your hospital appointment tomorrow," Itachi reminded him.

"I said I'm not crazy, why should I go and see a psychiatrist!?"

"I seriously think you're showing symptoms of schizophrenia and you should really consider making sure—"

"I think if I were crazy, I should know." Kisame turned away abruptly, torn between punching the Uchiha for being so annoying and blurting out a confession to him for being so concerned.

Sasori observed the pair. Kisame's got it bad for Uchiha. He turned to look at Deidara who was hanging on to the doorknob for dear life. And Hidan and Kakuzu obviously have a thing for each other. Zetsu likes Tobi... Tobi likes Deidara... Pein and Konan are obsessed with each other... I'm surrounded by idiots. A stray thought crossed his mind. If everyone likes someone, who does the brat like?

There was strangled yell from Kisame's room and the redhead's attention diverted slightly, eyes widening and eyebrows raised, a little irritated as Zetsu grabbed Deidara around the waist to help yank the door close against Kakuzu's frantic shouting and the muffled sounds that seemed like Hidan pounding on him.

"Just let the poor guy out," Kisame sighed.

Deidara let go and he and Zetsu tumbled backwards onto the ground, the door slamming open so hard against the wall the chandelier above the dining table vibrated.

Sasori was next to Deidara in three long strides, hauling him onto his feet. "Brat, this is not for your eyes. We're going home now."

"Aw man," Zetsu sniggered. "You two get along well."

Tobi gave a little yell and covered his eyes. "TOBI'S NOT READY FOR THIS!"

Kisame blushed.

Itachi choked on his coffee.

Everyone gathered outside the door, peering in. "Oh. My. Fucking. God."

A/N: Please review, guys! And a cookie for readers, plus an EXTRA cookie for reviewers! :D Thanks! :D