The Tool Party – Chapter Five
Chet's shout was just enough of a distraction to Johnny and Gage whipped his head around toward the others, his legs and arms flailing in the air like a bird wounded in mid-flight. His perfect dive now looked ridiculous and he landed in the water with a resounding splash that nearly reached Hal, who hadn't quite made it to the chairs yet.
John came up for air, gasping and sputtering, and about as mad at Chet as he'd ever been. He leaned his folded arms on the side of the pool and shook his head, attempting to clear the water from his ears. Roy got up and strolled over and stuffed another tortilla chip in his mouth and wiped his hands on his thighs before he knelt down.
"You okay?" he asked.
John sniffed and frowned, glaring in Chet's direction. "Yeah, I'm okay." With the help of Roy's outstretched hand, John lifted himself out of the pool and stood up. He wiped his face on the towel Roy had thoughtfully provided, then wrapped it around his waist. "I don't have chicken legs, Roy!" he muttered, angrily.
"Yeah...no chicken legs, I know," Roy mumbled back, hoping this wasn't going to be the start of a Kelly vs. Gage sparring match.
Chet was gasping and sputtering himself, but with laughter rather than water. "Gage!" he panted, "that was fantastic! You should have seen yourself!"
Marco reached over and punched Chet lightly on the shoulder, "Geez, Chet, can it already. Gage is gonna make you eat that towel you're wearing."
John merely continued his glare, twisting his mouth in as-yet-unspoken irritation and watched as Chet happily snatched another chip and took a swig of beer.
Before anything could be said, Quint Pulaski ambled in through the arbor gate, pushing a large wheelbarrow full of ice and a case's worth of Stroh's beer. "Hello, gents," he greeted, "thought this would be easier than making Halligan here keep running back to the house for more. I've saved this for a, uh, special occasion shall we say? I think this qualifies."
"Pulaski, that's brilliant. I am officially off the clock, I might add," Hal told the gardener. "I believe you can wheel that over here."
Johnny snagged a bottle of beer from the wheelbarrow as it went by and plopped himself down on one of the lounges. He twisted off the top, took a long pull and thought about saying something more to Chet about his 'chicken-legs' remark. He shot another sideways glance in Kelly's direction and noticed Chet grimace slightly as he sat up from the back of the lounge.
"Uh-huh, bet that sunburn is startin' to bug him a bit," Gage thought ruefully. "Good. Serves him right."
Chet shifted his shoulders to and fro, then made a face when his skin felt hot, tight and almost...papery. He shook his curly hair and leaned forward to grab a fresh, cold Stroh's for himself. He paused for a moment, trying to decide how he could nonchalantly hold the cold brew to his hot cheeks. "I, uh, gotta take a leak," he muttered and gingerly unstuck himself from the chair. He sucked in a breath and faked a smile when the others looked over at him.
"Chet?" Cap asked, "You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, Cap," Chet promised, "I'm good, just gotta, uh, well, I'll be right back." He jerked a thumb towards the house, "Ya' know..."
The others nodded knowingly and went back to their beer and conversations. Chet, meanwhile, noticed his arms felt stiff and the continued licking he gave his lips rendered no relief to the heat and dryness he felt. He grabbed the bottle of suntan lotion and happened to glance over toward Gage and noticed the paramedic smirking behind his beer bottle. Chet walked past John's chair and shot him a look, silently daring him to say something. Johnny merely shrugged his shoulders and raised an eyebrow as if he had no idea what Chet could be thinking.
Without warning, Mike jumped up, belched loudly and tossed his beer bottle behind him on the chair. Then he dropped the towel from around his waist and yelled, "Time for a dip!" and careened across the patio toward the pool. "Cannon-baaaall!"
Marco, Roy, Johnny and Cap sat there, open-mouthed in surprise as their Engineer, who up until that point hadn't said a whole lot, tucked his knees up under himself in mid-air and made a spectacular splash into the deep end of the swimming pool.
"Sheesh, Cap," Marco muttered, "get a coupla' beers in that guy and he destroys every preconceived notion you've ever had about him." He shook his head and took another swig.
Cap blew out a breath and turned toward the guest sitting to his right. "So, ah, Quint," he began, hoping to get that last image of Stoker out of his head, "Halligan said you're the gardener and more here, eh? How do you like that sort of thing?"
"Oh, I love it, Captain," Quint answered. " Nothing like all this acreage to keep a guy busy, that's for sure. I like being handy to have around; job security you know." He smiled and pried himself from his chair. "In fact, if you'll excuse me for just a minute, I think I'll go check on those sprinkler controls. They should have gone off by now. Every three hours for twenty minutes on the dot and they're about ten minutes behind, I believe."
Halligan stood up as well. "I think I'll check if Higbee's returned. I'm getting hungry; maybe he's bought something to throw on the grill." Holding his beer between thumb and forefinger, he lifted it to his lips and took one last, long gulp, emptying it with a satisfying slurp. He took the bottle with him and picked up the other empties to dispose of in the house. The remaining four returned to their stunned observation of Mike who was now climbing out and heading toward the diving board.
"Whoo! That was great!" Mike shouted. "Watch this!" He bounced on the edge of the board and made another dive, quite a bit more graceful than his last attempt.
Chet, meanwhile, had locked himself upstairs in one of the spacious guest bathrooms and tried unsuccessfully to get a good look at his back. He held a small hand mirror he found in the drawer and twisted around in front of the larger mirror above the sink, contorting himself in ways he'd never done before. He could feel the heat emanating from his back and face. He knew he was sunburned; he couldn't miss the angry pink shade his arms had taken on- they matched his rosy cheeks which made him look perpetually embarrassed.
"Man," he grumbled, "I am burnt to a crisp. Darn that Gage, he's never going to let me live this down." He glared at the bottle of suntan lotion in his hand. "Dumb stuff. 'Turbo-charged', huh? Phooey."
The plastic bottle thunked loudly as he tossed it in the chrome wastebasket. Deciding he wanted to try to lessen the sting of his flushed skin, he rooted around in the cabinets, searching for something to cool the heat. "Huh...what's this stuff? Noxzema?" He read the jar's label. "Removes makeup, soothes burns..." He unscrewed the cap and took a deep sniff. "Yuck! That stinks! Not using this, they'd smell me for miles."
His uncle, though wealthy, successful, and naturally as charming as all the other Kelly men, hadn't yet found a female to share his life, so the selection of remedies was definitely on the disappointing side. "Jeez, a chick would've had a ton of stuff to use," Chet muttered. "Guess, I'll just stick to splashing some cold water on my face."
At first, Chet splashed cold water from the sink faucet, then wetted a wash-cloth and pressed it to his cheeks and lips. The cool water offered such relief, Chet thought perhaps he'd take a quick shower- that way he'd cool off his arms and back as well. He started the shower and turned away, bending over to unstrap his sandals. "Hm, that feels nice too," he thought when his hot feet touched the cold white tile floor.
Unbeknownst to Chet, the shower head had been turned in such a way that it was spraying outside the large tub and on the floor behind him. Turning around, his bare feet stepped in a puddle and the spray hit him in the face. "Whoop!" he yelled as his feet slipped and he grabbed the towel bar to keep from falling. The towel bar, however, had other ideas and pulled away from the wall. Chet went down like a sack of wet cement, whacking his already tender face on the side of the tub on the way.