Callie sat on tenterhooks, Hotch had called and announced to come by with Jack an hour ago. She wondered, what words Hotch probably might have found to explain to his son what would be. Even for her as a writer, that would be so hard, like nothing else.
She was glad when it finally rang. "I thought ... " Callie stopped mid-sentence, this wasn´t Hotch, the man seemed vaguely familiar to her, but she could not place him somewhere.
"Yes, please?"
"My name is Derek Morgan, I 'm a friend of Hotch." Derek showed his badge as a precaution, he was afraid, she´d slam the door right into his face.
" I think, I remember you. But please, do come in."
Derek didn´t know exactly what brought him here, he probably just wanted to know who she was.
"If you want to ask me not to die, then I´m sorry, Agent Morgan. Wish I could do you that favor." Callie said flatly, and sat down on her couch. Derek noticed the dark circles under her eyes and her left arm, she held it awkward, like she couldn´t feel it properly.
Derek swallowed, he did not quite know what to say.
"I wanted to know, for whom Hotch has left his team", he finally said.
Callie nodded, " I can understand that. I didn´t ask for it , if that's, what you want to know. I did not even want him to fall in love with me, or me, falling in love with him. But he made it so easy for me, Aaron is such a good man." Callie smiled a bit, "but I don´t need to say that, for sure. "
Derek shook his head, "no, you don´t have to. Hotch has people who care about him, Callie. We ... I'm... afraid he can´t handle all that."
"Hotch told me about his wife and this man, Foyet? And I know what he is facing every day. I know very well, Hotch is desperate and lonely, Agent Morgan. He told me, he doesn´t know anymore, how to live. He and me, we´ll live together, as long as we can. I wanna show him, how to live. I want to give him back his faith. This will be my gift to him and Jack. Maybe my death isn´t totally in vain."
Callie shivered, trying to keep her composure. "You´d better go now, Hotch and Jack will come every minute and I don´t want Jack to see me like this."
There was a knock at the door. "I hope you have a good explanation ready," Callie said to Derek and opened the door. Of course it was Hotch, who had a bottle of red wine in his hand.
"If I remember correctly, we were talking about pizza this morning? Oh, and I brought reinforcements." Jack was peeking from behind Hotch 's back and Callie bent down to him.
"Hello, sweetheart. You have to be Jack, right? Your Daddy told me a lot about you. I'm Callie, but you probably know already."
Jack nodded, " Hi Callie," he said, coming forward, but still holding his father´s sleeve.
Callie smiled, "so come in, then. Incidentally, there´s a visitor for you, Hotch. He said he wanted to talk to you," Callie used a little white lie and built Morgan a small bridge.
"Morgan? How the ... What are you doing here?" Hotch asked, completely surprised.
"Um, Callie already said it, I wanted to talk to you. Hey Jack."
"Hey, Uncle Derek," Jack jumped up to him and Derek twirled him around. "You´re all right, mate?"
Callie took the bottle from Hotch, " You can talk outside on the roof, you´ll be undisturbed," she said in a low voice.
"Jack, we want to make pizza together? Your Daddy told me, it´s your favorite?"
"Oh yes, Callie. I can choose what we put on it ? "
"Of course, you come into the kitchen with me? "
" Ye -hes, I want to have a lot of cheese, Callie. "
oOo
" I'm sorry Hotch. I was an asshole." Derek admitted on the roof.
"I didn´t notice," Hotch said dryly.
"It was just so surprising and you didn´t talk to anyone, Hotch."
"I couldn´t, Derek. But leaving was the only way to...Lucy Simms, the last victim? When we dragged her out of the water, for a little moment, she was looking like Jack. And I realized, I cannot go on like this, without becoming insane. And then I met Callie. She's such a positive person, despite everything. I want all the time I can get with her."
"You love her," Derek concluded. "The heart is always the heart, Emily said, before I kissed her."
Hotch had to laugh, "you did what? And she didn´t shoot you?"
"Why would she do that, I'm a fantastic kisser," Derek grinned. "So you still can do it," Derek said firmly.
"What?"
"Share a Laugh, Hotch. I didn´t see that in a long time, you should do it more often."
"Then you have to kiss Emily more often. What were you thinking?"
Morgan shrugged. "Honestly, I don´t know for sure. I simply wanted it, perhaps because life is so short, Hotch. She ran for the hills, like the devil was behind her, apparently my kissing qualities are a bit overrated." Derek patted Hotch´s shoulder. "We should go back in, don´t leave her alone for so long. She´s a good girl, Hotch. We´re good?"
"We were always good from my side, Derek. " Hotch replied firmly and the two men went back into the living room.
"Do you want to stay for dinner?" Callie asked from the kitchen. Derek denied.
"Thanks, there is some place, I have to be. But we´re playing softball on Sunday, versus this wimps from Homeland Security, would be nice if you´d come. 2 p.m. on our sports grounds. We´d all be glad."
"And we will gladly come, or what do you think, Jack?" Callie asked.
"Uncle Derek always says things, that Daddy doesn´t want me to hear. I think that's funny," Jack chuckled.
"Then that 's settled. Oh, and give Emily my regards." Hotch smiled, as he accompanied Morgan to the door. He knew exactly, what date Derek had in mind.
"Can I help you? " Hotch asked. Jack and Callie sat peacefully at the kitchen counter and cut the ingredients for the topping.
"You can take care of the dough , if you want. ... The.." Callie looked unsuccessfully for the right word.
"Rolling-pin?"
Aaron offered carefully and Callie nodded, relieved. "The rolling-pin is in the drawer next to the fridge. I didn´t know, you and Jack were tree huggers. "
"Tree huggers?"
Hotch repeated irritated and Jack chuckled again, "because we don´t eat tuna, Daddy. Because of the dolphins. "
"Um, yeah. I guess we´re tree huggers then, Callie." Anyhow, tree huggers sounded much more child-friendly than 'environmentalists.' Jack and he had been in the mall some time ago, where they met with a Greenpeace information booth. They had spoken about the dolphins, dying in the tuna fishermen´s nets. Since then tuna was a taboo in the Hotchner household, Jack was very persistent about that.
Hotch struggled with the dough on the baking sheet. In the end, it seemed a bit unconventional, Hotch had simply decided not to distribute the dough into the corners. What, of course, didn´t spoil the taste. Jack opted for ham, mushrooms and a lot of cheese, Callie and Hotch chose ham and pineapple.
Hotch watched Callie very carefully, but apparently she was relatively ok. Sometimes she lacked for the right words, but she disguised that very good.
After dinner Jack asked Callie a lot of questions about the purple-eared rabbit. She answered very gladly and willingly, often she was laughing with Jack about his thoughts and ideas. They sat on the huge sofa and enjoyed themselves splendidly. If Hotch wouldn´t have known better, one might have taken them for a happy family. He suddenly couldn´t breathe and quickly slipped out, on the roof. Callie glanced him a worried look.
"Daddy is sad because you 're going to an angel, Callie ," Jack said quietly and sat down on Callie's lap. "You don´t wanna be an angel?" he wanted to know.
"It's not bad to be an angel, Jack. Angels watch out for their loved ones. I'd just like to stay a little longer with you and your Dad." Callie tried to explain and Jack put his arms around her.
"Why do you have to leave, Callie?"
" I don´t know, Jack. I have no answer, sweetheart, it´s just the way it is." Callie pulled Jack a little closer and rocked him gently back and forth.
Hotch sat outside in the beach chair that stood on the terrace. Somehow it had become his favorite place, he felt safe in this chair, kind of. He clung to a pillow and tried to breathe calmly. Spending such a seemingly happy evening with Jack and Callie, felt as if an iron bracket was put around his heart. As Hotch had regained some of his composure and came back into the living room, Callie and Jack slept on the couch. Both of them looked calm and peaceful, Jack´s head lay Callie's lap and Callie leaned half at one of her pillows, half she lay on Jack. For sure, that wasn´t really comfortable, but neither Callie nor Jack seemed to find that disturbing. Hotch remembered the camera, he had seen on Callie´s shelf and went quietly to look after it. Callie was a tidy person and so it was still lying, where Hotch had seen it last.
oOo
Derek stood for some time in front of Emily's apartment without being able to decide to ring the bell. He had to remember, how scared Emily looked at him and how she took flight, as headless, as he had never seen her before.
"What the hell," Derek said loudly, got out of his car and rang the bell.
" I already have a vacuum cleaner," Emily´s voice came from the intercom and Derek laughed, "Then I´m gonna be the friendly Avon consultant from across the street."
Morgan heard muffled giggles before the door buzzer sounded. Emily was waiting for him in the doorway, with Sergio on her arm.
"Is this the ominous dark-haired, you meet that often?" he asked, scratching the little tiger behind his ears. "You 've been crying ," Derek said firmly.
"I felt like crying," Emily said and let Derek in. "I just can´t get Hotch and Callie out of my head, Derek." Sergio meowed annoyed, because Prentiss put him down on the floor.
"The way we all feel right now, Em."
Derek pointed at the bottle of vodka that was on the table, "mind, if I join you?" he asked. Emily opened the showcase and handed Derek another glass. Derek poured some vodka in it.
"Because of this afternoon, " Derek began, after Emily sat next to him.
"Oh, you came to apologize?"
"Wow. Excuse me, but you 've answered my kiss, Emily. Okay, then you um..left, but you have answered to it."
Emily groaned, " I 'm not made of wood, Morgan. You just caught me on the wrong foot. " she confessed.
"Is it still the wrong foot? " Derek asked and moved closer. He stroked Emily 's hair from her face, she didn´t move, she looked into Derek´s eyes, directly.
"Only once, Derek. Do you understand? It has to be absolutely clear. This one time, we will never talk about it again and it will never happen again."
"Never again," Derek muttered and kissed her. Like automatically Emily's hands slipped under Morgan's shirt and caressed his back, she needed only seconds to pull his shirt off. Derek moaned softly, she knew what she wanted. He freed her from her top. It felt so right when Derek carried her into the bedroom and they lost all remaining garments. Their body's danced that passionate dance, that was yet so old, but always new, the same and yet so different.
"Never again?" Derek asked as both of them lay side by side, completely exhausted.
"Never again," Emily replied breathlessly.
A/N Thanks to Ramona, tissues will be needed, I´m afraid. And also a big Thank You, for everyone, reading this.