Disclaimer: I'm thinking two more chapters, including this one.
The first month in District 2 is the worst month of my life. Hands down.
Nightmares from the war plaque my system, rotting my insides and freezing my heart. I'm always paralyzed from them. I can't move until I die in the nightmare. It's completely awful, especially since the war memories have been added to previous nightmares of mine collapses and whippings. Sleeping during the night has almost become nonexistent. The only time I do sleep is when I'm going to pass out from exhaustion. I can feel the sleep-loss taking it's toll on my body, as I'm unable to stay awake during the workday, nor am I able to concentrate on my work.
The apartment I moved into after I arrived in 2 is fully furnished, and very nice. But, it isn't good enough. Even though the apartment is small, it feels much too large without Madge, or someone here with me. The apartment itself is in a very nice neighborhood, and luckily, my neighbors have taken me in. The elderly couple next door invites me over every Sunday night for dinner, and for that I'm very thankful. They give me company, and hope for something better to come from this mess.
The country is settling down from the aftermath of Katniss' plan. Paylor, from District 8, is elected temporary President, and by the looks of it, she's going to become the permanent President of Panem. Coriolanus Snow and Alma Coin's bodies were buried, far away from the country. Their whereabouts are unknown, but a few select people know where they are. The government is handling citizen deaths, finding them places to be buried and such . Monuments have sprung up all over the country, several in each district. There's one right outside the building where I work. Inscribed on it are names of soldiers of District 2, who fought for both the Capitol and Rebel side. Even though we didn't want the Capitol to win, those soldiers still need to be honored for their bravery.
The final Hunger Games idea blew up as soon as Katniss shot Coin. They never happened. Katniss is still in rehabilitation for psychological treatment. Peeta and Haymitch returned to District 12, along with Katniss' mother and sister. From what I've heard in the tabloids, they're recovering nicely. It makes me sick that their recovery is being played all over the country, but I guess some things will never change. Haymitch mentioned to me that he was going to try to make a deal that the press doesn't even come near 12 anymore, since everyone there is so messed up.
Thom and Bristel moved to District 10, because Bristel had a lead on a family member or something. Occasionally, I'll get a call from Thom, and we'll talk for a few minutes, but we stay out of each other's hair. All of us are still recovering from seeing that much destruction in one place at one time. Finnick and Annie went back to District 4 and gave Mags a proper burial. I know because Finnick called me that night and told me glumly about it. The man wishes that Katniss and Peeta had been there, because they were so fond of her.
My family remained in District 13. My mother eventually wants to move out of the district, but for now, all of them need a sense of stability. From what my mother has told me, District 13 is in better shape now that there's a new president. She said that now they're allowed to go outside, and that the kids are loving it. My siblings won't speak to me. I don't know if it's because they're afraid of me, or my mother doesn't want them to speak to me. Sometimes, when I'm talking to my mother, I'll hear Posy telling her something in the background. Rory and Vick won't even go near my mother when she's talking to me. It hurts my heart that they're so afraid of me.
Madge doesn't call often. When she does, we can only talk for a few minutes, as the time-zones are so different. Whenever I try to call her, I get her voicemail. In some ways, I believe that she is afraid of me as well. She has every right to be, honestly. The bomb that blew her arm off could've been mine, I made so many. She doesn't remember if the hovercraft had the Capitol embellishment on it or not. I hope she never does remember. My mom says that she's recovering well and she's slowly learning how to do things with one arm. I never doubted that she could do it.
As for me, well, I'm a mess. I have bags under my eyes, and I look like death. I see myself in the mirror every morning. I see my reflection, and how broken I look. I feel disgusting. With myself, with my work, with everything I've done. I work in Special Defense for Panem, and while it pays very nicely and I'm able to get by with more than enough money, I hate it. I hate it so much, because that's what caused so many people to die in the war. But, I power through it. I work with Beetee, and when he's not in treatment for psychological treatment, we get along like old buddies.
I grow older every day, and I know that I drain myself faster every day. I've realized that if I work more, then I will be able to forget about everything that I've done and focus on the present. My goal in work is to make for a better tomorrow, and pray that another war doesn't come afoot.
Beetee tells me that all memories fade after a while. He says that while he still has nightmares from his two times in the Games, or from seeing the tapes on the war, the memories go away and become foggier as time goes on. Beetee explains to me that the brain forgets even the most horrible things, and that it can get better. I just hope that he's right, and that one day my family will look at me again and I'll be the same way that I was before this.
There's one Sunday night where I'm over at the Caverly's (the elderly couple next door) when my cell phone rings. Usually, while I'm over there, I let it ring and worry about it later. They don't mind the noise, I just find that it's rude to answer my phone while I'm in their company. But, when it rings three more times, Atticus shoos me and makes me answer the phone.
"Hello?" I finally say, once I'm out on the back porch.
There's panting for a few seconds before I hear a voice. "Gale? Is that you?"
My brows furrow and I glance back inside. The two are watching me like hawks, and I give them a grin that probably looks like a grimace. "Madge? What's wrong?" I hear sniffling on the other line, and I drop my voice. "Madge? Are you okay?
"I.. I just needed to hear your voice. Nightmare."
"Are you okay?" I repeat, shifting the phone to my other shoulder.
"I-I'm okay. Just shaken up." I chew on my lip and sigh.
"You sure? You can talk to me, you know." I tell her and I hear her sniffle again. God, I hate when she has nightmares and calls me like this. It wouldn't be the first time that this has happened, nor will it be the last. If she would've just come with me, then I would already be there to help her get through it, but instead she's in 13, all alone. "Madge? Still there?"
I hear her voice crack when she speaks again and my entire being almost cracks with it. "I miss you. I-I should've come with y-you, I—"
My fingers press the phone closer to my ear so I can hear her quiet voice. She's crying. "Hey, hey, Madge don't do this. It's okay."
"I want to come see you," She says quickly and I sigh.
"Well, I want you to come see me too, but—" I'm interrupted when the back door slides open.
"Alright there, son?" Atticus asks me, and I spin around quickly and force a smile.
"Yessir," I reply, "Just have to take an important call; I'll be back in soon."
"Take your time." He gives me a fatherly like grin before stepping back inside. I slouch back onto the railing of the porch.
"Who was that?" Madge asks next, voice still shaking.
I sit down in one of the chairs on the deck and rub my face. "Just one of my neighbors. It's okay." I pause, and she sniffles. "Madge, if you want to come see me, I'm perfectly okay with that. Ecstatic, even." She mumbles something that I don't catch. "Hm?"
She coughs a little. "I don't have the money to get all the way to District 2, Gale."
I sigh and rub my face before glancing back inside. Jodie and Atticus seem to be watching me, but look away when they catch me staring. "Then.. Then I'll pay for a train ticket for you to get here, it's okay. I have the money."
"I don't want you to pay for that, Gale. I'll... I'll just save up for a couple months and then I'll come down."
Some of my stubbornness must have rubbed off on her, because she will not take the ticket I could pay for her. "Are you sure, Madge? You could come down here a lot sooner if I did buy a ticket.
"I don't want to burden you." She mumbles and I shake my head, chuckling to myself.
"You're definitely not a burden to me, Madge." I glance back inside. "Hey, can I call you tomorrow? I'm kind of at my neighbors house for dinner and I'm being rude."
She chuckles a little. "And God forbid that Gale Hawthorne be rude to someone."
"You're impossible."
Madge laughs, before bidding me goodnight. I hurry back inside, and there I'm ambushed with questions. Reminds me of the first time Madge came over back in District 12, when it was still standing.
Two months later, Madge and I are much better. We talk on the phone for hours on end, and usually, fall asleep talking to one another. In the two months, I've become less of a shell and more of a person. Sure, nightmares are still common, and work itself is a nightmare, but I have my Madge.
There's one night a week before my birthday when Madge tells me something.
"I have a birthday surprise for you." She giggles on the other line.
"Oh, do you now?" I laugh, and smirk to myself.
"Yeah," She pauses and the phone shifts. "It should be getting there on Friday."
I groan. "It's Tuesday, Madge. You're really gonna make me wait that long?"
"Yes." I grumble and she scolds me for cursing. I laugh once again.
"Well can I at least get a hint?"
She's quiet for a moment, but then finally speaks up. "You're gonna love it."
"Thanks, really narrows the idea." I tease and she laughs, the tinkling laugh that I love so much. I glance at my watch. "I gotta go, I have an early morning tomorrow."
"Talk to you tomorrow?"
"Don't you always?"
She laughs. "Yeah. And Gale? I love you."
I smile. She hasn't said it in a while. "I love you too, Madge." So much.
Once Friday night rolls around, I'm anxiously awaiting Madge's surprise. She told me a couple nights ago that she would be working all night last night, so I couldn't talk to her. All week I've been pestering her to find out what it is, but she wouldn't budge.
The doorbell rings around seven o'clock, and I assume that it's the delivery person. Boy, am I wrong.
I open the door slightly, and immediately pull the woman in front of me into my arms. "Sweet God," I groan, lifting her off of the ground. Her arm wraps around my neck and she laughs, giggling when I set her on the front porch railing. "Oh my God are you really here?" I breathe into her hair, smelling the familiar scent of her body. Strawberries. Dammit. My hands don't know where to settle on her body; I want to touch all of her at once, to make sure she's really here and that I'm not imagining this.
"I'm really here, Gale." My girlfriend laughs, and I kiss her passionately. She responds just as enthusiastically, and I smile into the kiss when her fingers skirt up my shirt.
"We're on my porch, Madge. I have neighbors." I laugh, and Madge quickly pulls her hand out. I kiss her again, my fingers running through her curls. Her fingers toy with the hair on my neck and I smile again. "Why the hell did you not tell me you were the surprise, you God awful woman?" I nuzzle her neck and she sighs pleasantly. My stomach knots greatly, a feeling I haven't felt since before we split in 13. "God, I have missed you." I murmur, my hands wrapping around her tiny waist. She's gained some weight back, and I'm pleased. Her hand rests on my chest and I quickly bend down and kiss her forehead. "C'mon. Let's go inside."
She hops off of the railing and I lead her inside. Immediately, she drops her bag on the kitchen table, and scurries in and out of the rooms of the apartment. I chuckle, and follow her as she explores. Eventually, I give up and just wait for her in the kitchen, sipping on a glass of water. Usually, I would get a beer or something, but I don't know what she wants.
Finally, she reappears in the living room and smiles at me, sitting down at the table. "I like your apartment. It smells like you." I chuckle and sit down in the chair next to her.
We're quiet for a few minutes, her looking around the room, and me staring at her. I speak up next. "Do you want to stay in tonight?"
Madge nods quickly. "Would that be too hard? I've been on a train for twelve hours, and I'm exhausted."
"Nah, we can stay in. I'll order pizza or something." She nods again.
"Can I shower? I feel disgusting." I smirk, and then stand.
"Yeah, follow me." She follows me to my room, and I hand her a towel out of the closet. "Do you have clothes?"
She nods once again. "I'll need a shirt." I smirk and her and Madge's cheeks burst a beautiful shade of pink. I throw her one of mine and she's still blushing when she enters the bathroom.
When Madge is done, I enter my room again, to find her struggling to dry her hair. I sit on the bed and start to help her, but I don't get too far until she hisses at me. "I can do it." Her arm works in overtime, attempting to dry all of her hair at once. I raise my hands in defeat.
"I don't doubt it, Madge. Just tell me if you need help, that's what I'm here for." I tell her gently and she hesitantly nods. When she's finally done, I press a kiss to her temple. "There you go. It's okay." She leans into me before kissing my jaw. I smile softly. I'm just about to kiss her again, when the doorbell rings. I groan and she stands.
"I'll get it. You stay here." I laugh, and let her go. When she opens the door, I forget that I didn't hand her the money, so I grab some out of my wallet and hurry to the door. When I get there, I find that the pizza guy will not stop hitting on her. He's practically undressing her with his eyes. Anger pools in my stomach, and I walk up behind her and snake my arm around her waist.
"You forgot the money, babe." I say to her, and she looks up at me before smirking. I glare the guy down and he stares at his feet for the rest of the exchange. My insides soar triumphantly. Madge is mine, and he just crossed the line. When the doors closed, Madge sets the pizza box on the table before standing on her toes to kiss me.
"You should get jealous more often. It's cute." I scoff at her, but allow her to kiss me. I grin when her fingers skim up my shirt again.
"Missed me, much?" I tease and her cheeks burst pink again. I smirk and release her body. I pull some paper plates out of the pantry and we get some pizza. We end up eating on the couch, with me eating a lot more than her. She giggles every time I get another piece and I swat her cheek in return. At some point after we finished eating, we start kissing and quickly her fingers help my shirt fall to the ground. When I start to pull hers off, she stops me and pushes my hand away. I raise an eyebrow and she pushes me up so we're sitting again.
"My shoulder," She says quietly, "I-I don't..."
In response, I kiss her again. "Madge, I don't care. You're beautiful to me. It doesn't matter, I love you. That's not changing it." She's still hesitant. "We don't have to. In fact, I actually need to talk to you about some stuff." She nods, biting her lip.
We sit back on the couch, and her fingers run over the new scars on my chest from that mutt. "How are you coping?" I ask, and she sighs.
"It's.. It's getting easier. At first, it was really hard to do anything. I couldn't use a fork and a knife at the same time, it was difficult for me to manage anything." My eyes trace over her features while she sighs. "It's gotten better, but it's still a struggle." I nuzzle her neck and press a kiss to her collarbone.
"It's going to get easier. I promise." I murmur and she sighs.
"They've offered me a prosthetic arm, but I still can't do anything with that either." She replies, leaning her head back on the top of the couch.
"You should take it," I say, and she shakes her head.
"I can't afford it, Gale. I barely scraped enough money for tickets here and back, I'm not going to be able to get a full arm for myself."
I grumble before tugging her body closer to me. "Please let me help you, Madge." She shakes her head and I kiss her fingertips. "I want to help you, please let me."
She very quiet for a couple more minutes, until she speaks again. "Let me think about it, okay?"
"Okay." I reply, nodding. At least she's going to consider the possibility.
"Can I ask you something now?" I nod vigorously, and she continues. "That day you left 13... Why didn't you call when you got to 2?"
I rub my face and groan. This is something I didn't want to talk about, at all. "Well, I... I don't know, Madge. I knew that you wanted your space, and I was going to give that to you. I also knew that you needed some time to cope, and I did too. I didn't want to interfere with any recovery that you might've been going through, nor did I want to try to convince you to move down here with me. I knew you didn't want to, and I didn't want to push the decision. Knowing myself, I knew that as soon as I talked to you I was going to try to get you to come down here."
Madge sighs and crawls into my lap. "Gale, it's okay. I can understand why you wouldn't want to call me. But there's something that you need to know." I cock and eyebrow and my hands find her hips, pulling her closer to me. "I've missed you so much, and I've hated being two-thousand miles away from each other." She pauses and chews her lip momentarily. "I want to move down here with you."
Immediately at her words my body fills with the most euphoric of emotions, and my face contorts to the biggest smile I think I've ever had. She smiles a little at my reaction and I pull her body towards me, pressing her into me. "Are you serious?"
She laughs. "Of course I am, Gale. I want to be with you, and not in a long-distance relationship. I want to wake up to you every morning and make dinner with you." I laugh greatly and sloppily kiss her.
"You're perfect." I murmur once we come up for air. I look at her mused hair (courtesy of me) and puffy lips (also me) and just everything that makes her truly and completely mine.
A/N: So it all worked out. Huzzah! Anyways: Next chapter will be the last chapter, just wrapping it all up. Guys I really want a response on these next to chapters since it's literally the end. Please? c: I'm a loser and have nothing to do on New Years Eve, so I'm at home with my family. Happy New Year to my lovely readers!