A/N: I promised that I wouldn't completely tear your hearts out with this chapter, but I did not promise you wouldn't cry. I apologize for any inaccuracies with regards to the foster care system, and I ask that you remember that this is a work of fiction and my goal is to explore Finn and Rachel's emotional journey and their pursuit of their dream of a family. I would also like to apologize for taking so long to get this chapter published, but for some reason I had a great deal of trouble; you should all take Kelsey (bbyduck on tumblr) for rescuing me. This chapter is dedicated to her because without her there would be no chapter.
i.
"We could adopt." Finn muttered as he tightened another screw on Caleb's new crib; he couldn't help, but feel a little jealous of his best friend. "Rachel and me, I mean; we could adopt a kid."
"It's an option." Puck tossed aside the instructions, muttering under his breath; Finn knew he had to be careful what he said because adoption was a sensitive issue for his best friend. "But I thought you and Rachel wanted to have kids of your own."
"The kid would still be our kid, even if we didn't conceive it; plus we could keep trying." Finn let out a sigh. "Rachel will think the suggestion is me giving up on her, though, like I don't think she can ever get pregnant and so I've suggested another option. She's already convinced that she's a failure because of all this."
"I love your midget-y wife like a sister, but she's got a case of the baby crazies." Puck chuckled as he and Finn attempted align the rails on the crib. "I think it's a female thing because San's going to blow a gasket if we don't finish the nursery soon. She's already freaking out because we had to repaint the walls since we're having a boy."
"Is there any reason we have to put together a brand new crib? It's not like the one we did for Becca was pink."
"Because San and Rachel insisted that we give Becca's crib to Kurt and Sam, for the baby girl they adopted." Puck tightened another screw. "You know, adoption's not a bad option if you think about it. You'd be able to give a kid who might otherwise not have such great parents a great home. I mean look at Beth. There was no way Quinn and me could take care of her, no matter how bad—Shelby's a good mom from what I know, and that's what Beth needed, not two kids in high school."
The subject of Beth and her adoption was something the two men typically avoided; though Finn had long since forgiven Puck for the betrayal, neither liked to speak of it or of Quinn. For Finn it was a memory of a life that had been unpleasant and unhappy and of a threat of being trapped in Lima; Beth's adoption had also been a stinging point for Rachel, who'd seen it as her own mother choosing a part of Quinn over her because Shelby had refused to have a relationship with her even after she begged. There had been nights of tears when Finn had held Rachel and assured her that it wasn't like that at all. Finn was the only person who knew how much Beth had meant to Puck, not even Santana knew about the three day drinking binge after Shelby left with Beth the first time or what happened the week after Shelby was fired when Puck drove off to Cincinnati in an effort to clear his head and wound up getting a tattoo of a shark on his hip.
"Rachel's a big girl; she'll understand. And just because you adopt doesn't mean you two can't keep trying for one of you own." Finn nodded slowly. "You've got to remember that this is not the old high school Rachel Berry; she's way stronger than she used to be, and she can take a lot more than she used to. Have a little faith in your wife dude."
ii.
She had been sure of it this time. For the first in months she was positive that the little white stick in her hand was accurate, and she was going to have a baby; she'd called Finn in the taxi on the way home, eager to tell him the good news, and he'd been cautiously optimistic. Maybe things were finally turning around for them. Her excitement is infectious, and he wanted so desperately to share it with her; the knowledge that she could be building herself up to another disappointment was killing him. He didn't want to see her cry again, and he prayed that just this once things would go their way.
"I've been feeling a bit sick, and I'm late." When Finn lifted his eyebrows, she shook her head. "My period, Finn, it's almost a week late."
"Oh, I see." He reached for her hands, lacing his fingers with hers. "Baby, I know you're excited, but I don't want—"
"Finn, it's really happening this time; I can feel it!" The look on her face told him that there was no way that he was going to get her to calm down; truth be told, they'd been trying so hard and he wanted her to be right about this. "This is it, baby; we're going to have our family at last."
"I hope so, sweetheart; I really hope so." He pressed a kiss to her knuckles. "I just want to make sure that we aren't getting our hopes up when things haven't exactly been going our way."
"Y-you don't believe in me anymore, do you? You don't think that I can get pregnant." Tears sprang in her eyes, and he pulled her close.
"Baby, that's not what I mean at all; of course I believe in you, and I know that it's going to happen for us. I just know how upset you were the last time, and I don't want to see you hurt again." He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "I love you so much, sweetheart, and I want to have a family with you; I really hope this time it's going to happen for us because you're going to be a great mom and we're going to make a child really happy."
She murmured that she loved him, and he wiped a tear from her cheek; the rest of the evening was spent curled up on the couch watching movies and nibbling on chocolate covered popcorn. Rachel talked happily about making appointments, and by the time she drifted off with her head on his shoulder, she had Finn convinced that this time was it. He fell asleep with his arms around her, and his dreams were filled with babies and a smiling Rachel.
By lunch two days later their hope was turned to despair when he returned from the Chinese restaurant to find Rachel curled up on the couch, crying into a pillow. He knew almost instantly what was wrong, and he felt a flash of anger at whatever cosmic power kept doing this to them; how many more times would Rachel get her hopes up only to be disappointed? How much more could they take? He couldn't help but wonder if he was being punished for something. He settled on the couch next to her, scooping the small woman into his arms and holding her against his chest.
"Baby, what's wrong?" He didn't want her to think he was expecting this to happen; she already felt like a failure. "What happened?"
"I got my period today, Finn." She sobbed softly, burying her face in his chest. "I'm not pregnant. I'm never going to get pregnant."
"Shhh, baby, don't say that. You know what the doctor said. We just have to be patient." He kissed the top of her head. "It'll happen in time."
"No it won't! I'm never going to have a baby. I can't give you a family, Finn; I'm a failure." Her small fingers gripped the fabric of his shirt, and he could feel her tears soaking through the fabric."I wouldn't blame you if you wanted a—"
"Rachel Barbra Hudson, don't you dare say that." He lifted her chin to look into her eyes. "I love you so much, and I'm never going to stop loving you. No matter what happens, I will always love you. You are my wife, but more than that, you're my partner and my soul mate. I don't care if we never have a child of our own; I'm never going to leave you."
"But I know how much you want a family, and I can't—I can't give you that." The tears continued to fall, and he tried to wipe them away with his thumbs.
"Baby, we can have a family, and we will." She rested her head against his chest. "I promised you that we'd make all your dreams come true, and I'm going to keep that promise."
"But what if—" But Finn placed a gentle finger on her lips.
"No what ifs, Rachel, we're going to have our family." He gently kissed her forehead, his next words slipping out before he thought about them. "What if we adopted? We could still try for a kid of our own, but maybe this is a sign that we're supposed to adopt first."
"Adopting?"
"I know that it's not what we planned, Rach, but it's an option." She chewed her lip softly. "It doesn't mean we're giving up or anything. Can we—can we just think about it?"
iii.
The weather had started to turn cold, and Finn shivered as he left the child services office; he clenched the manila envelope in his left hand, feeling a rush of both nervousness and excitement. He and Rachel had spent three days discussing their options, and she'd agreed that it couldn't hurt to at least pick up the application. He was nervous, more nervous than he'd anticipated. The lady he'd spoken with at the office said that it was a very difficult process with many steps, and he was suddenly afraid that perhaps with Rachel's very busy work schedule they wouldn't be good candidates for the job even though they lived in a very nice apartment and were financially secure.
Rachel had returned home to an empty apartment after rehearsal, and she could only assume one thing; Finn had gone to pick up the paper work. It had been a week since they'd discussed their options, and she still felt like she was admitting defeat and failure. Though Finn swore that she wasn't a failure and that they weren't giving up, Rachel still wanted to curl up and cry. Perhaps it was silly or childish, but she felt like a failure as a wife and a woman. What kind of wife couldn't give her husband even one child? What kind of woman couldn't get pregnant after over a year of trying and the use of fertility treatments? Finn deserved better; he deserved a wife who could give him a family like he'd always wanted.
She quickly changed into an old NYU t-shirt and shorts and curled up on the couch under her favorite blanket; there was a chill in the air, and she was glad that the heat would soon kick in and warm the apartment. But nothing took the chill out of her body or the feeling of utter loss. She knew that Finn meant well with his suggestion about fostering a child, and she knew he would always love her. None of it made her feel less like a failure. Closing her eyes, she tried not to wallow in her misery, and she didn't even hear Finn unlock the door to their apartment and step inside.
"Baby? Are you asleep?" The scent of peppermint greeted her, and he knelt in front of the couch holding a cup of her favorite tea.
"I'm awake." Her eyes fluttered open, and she offered him a weak smile.
"Are you ok? Something upset you?" He knew the answer, and it broke his heart. How many nights could a man see the woman he loved cry herself to sleep?
"Did you get the paperwork?" Her voice was flat, but she felt like the least she could do was be strong for Finn.
"Baby, we don't have to do this. We don't have to fill out the paperwork or go forward with this. I just thought—It doesn't matter. Sweetheart, I just want us to be happy again." He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. "I want you to be happy again, whatever it takes."
"I know, Finn, and I'm trying." She sighed softly. "But if we do this—it's like we're giving up on a child of our own; it's like you're giving up on me because I'm a failure. I've failed you."
"Stop right there. Rachel Hudson is not a failure." He reached for her hands, setting the tea cup aside for a moment. "Baby, you haven't failed at all, and you sure as hell haven't failed me. You are an amazing woman, and you couldn't possibly be a failure. The woman I fell in love with, the woman I married, is too damned perfect to ever be a failure."
"But, Finn—" He cut her off by pressing a finger to her lips, shaking his head.
"No buts, Rachel. This isn't us giving up on having a kid of our own. This is us helping a kid who doesn't have a family. We'll be making a difference, and it'll be like practice." He didn't mention Emma, though the little girl was constantly on his mind. "But we don't have to do this, sweetheart. I don't want to push you into something you aren't happy about or aren't comfortable with."
"No, I think I want to try." He softly kissed her forehead, his lips barely brushing her skin, and she offered a weak smile.
iv.
She'd been staring at the menu for the past twenty minutes, marking off things that the children might be allergic to and making lists of parents to invite and the few people that had come to help out or donated at the center, and so she was grateful when Puck and Finn began bringing in tables and boxes. Rachel and Finn had volunteered to help with a special Thanksgiving dinner at the center, and she'd dragged Santana and Puck into helping.
"Hey, Little Bit, where do you want these boxes of paper plates and shit?"
"Noah Puckerman, watch your language." She hissed as she indicated a corner of the small room. "This is a children's shelter, and I doubt Sister Theresa and Caroline would appreciate you enhancing the vocabularies of these kids with colorful language."
"Jeez, you sound like a mother." He made the comment without thinking, but he didn't miss the slight wince her received. "Sorry Rachel, didn't mean it like that."
"I know, Noah; it's still a sensitive topic." She bit her lip softly. "Finn and I are working on it; we've applied to become foster parents. It's not the same as you know—having our own, but it's a start."
It was the first time she'd told anyone about their plans; she'd even kept them from Santana. Telling people would make it real, and she was terrified that if she were to get her hopes up she'd only get hurt again. Puck set the box aside and wrapped her in a tight hug. A few moments later Finn and Santana appeared, with the Latina muttering something in Spanish; when Rachel looked up, she was just in time to see a very small girl with a pair of bright blue eyes looking out from behind her best friend, and for a moment her heart felt as if it had stopped.
Seeing her again was more than a surprise. Rachel had assumed that once she was taken in by the Grant family she'd never see Emma again; most of the children at the center either lived at the shelter or had parents who worked in the city. The Grants, from what Rachel had been able to discover, lived outside the city, and Mrs. Grant worked from home. It didn't seem likely that the Grants would drop Emma off at the center. It was more than a little worrisome that the little girl had returned, and Rachel hoped that it didn't mean things had gone poorly for her.
Santana rested a hand on her distended abdomen, rubbing in small circles, and Puck rushed to encourage her to sit. They were fairly certain that there would be a new Puckerman in the world very soon. Rachel felt guilty for the pang of envy that always plagued her when she thought of Santana and Puck and their family. She almost hated herself for the bitter feelings; it made the failings even worse.
"Puckerman, I will never let you touch me again." Santana practically growled at her husband, and he laughed.
Finn stumbled slightly when Emma threw her arms around his knees, and he had to reach for the wall to maintain his balance. She looked up at him with a bright smile. He felt the familiar twinge of pain that came with the look of trust and hope in the tiny girl's eyes. She wanted him to take her home, but he knew that he couldn't. For a moment he wondered if she was the reason that he wanted to foster kids, if the possibility of taking her in was what really made him want to become a foster parent. He wondered if Rachel felt the same way. Rachel had told him about Emma's placement with the Grants, and he'd hoped for the best. It seemed that those hopes had been false.
Two days later, Rachel found herself sitting in Sister Theresa's office at the shelter, staring at her hands in her lap. Santana told her that she should let it go and stop obsessing over Emma, but she couldn't help it. Emma had already overheard the conversation with Finn and Puck about adoption and foster parenting. The look of hope on the little girls face, as if it might be possible for her to come home with them, had been heartbreaking. Now Rachel wondered if maybe they could take her in after they were approved. But first she had to know why Emma was back at the shelter in the first place.
"I thought the Grants were a great family." Rachel tried not to allow her voice to shake. "I thought they were supposed to be very experienced and great with children."
"The Grants are an excellent family, Rachel, but it seems that Emma was a bit more than they could handle." Rachel's eyes widened; the girl she'd met was sweet and quiet, even if she was a bit shy and nervous. "Emma was unhappy there, and try as they might the Grants simply were unable to help her. As you've probably been informed during your preparation for becoming a foster parent, part of the job is to prepare the children for permanent placement in a family, and Emma was so unhappy that the Grants felt that perhaps she wasn't ready for that sort of change in her life."
"I don't understand. What happens to Emma?" The woman before her lowered her head. "Are they going to find her another family?"
"Well, considering the difficulties Emma may be having, her social worker will have to review the case and—"
"But what happens to Emma?" Rachel felt guilty for interrupting the older woman, but she was suddenly worried. "What will happen to her?"
"It's quite possible that she will go into a group home. The shelter is very crowded, it isn't meant to be a permanent home for any of the children. This is an emergency temporary home, a stopping point on their journeys."
"A group home? Is that like an orphanage?" Rachel's heart dropped. "You can't do that to her. She needs more than that. She needs a family."
"It's not up to me, dear; it will be up to her social worker, and it will be up to the families she might meet before then." Sister Theresa patted her hand, but she didn't feel any better about it.
v.
"I can't believe Kurt is in London over Thanksgiving. He's going to miss dinner." Carole Hummel let out a soft sigh as she helped her daughter-in-law with the rolls. "This is the first time since Burt and I were married that we haven't had both boys at Thanksgiving. We're really glad that we get to have dinner with you though, and I really appreciate you hosting it."
"We were going to travel to Lima, like we have for the past few years, but we have so much going on right now."
"Finn told me that you two were going to try to become foster parents, and I think it's wonderful." Rachel wondered how much Finn had told Carole about their troubles.
"Did he tell you that we'd been trying?" Her voice shook. "I mean, did he tell you that we'd been trying to have a child of our own?"
Carole had been the mother she never had; even when Shelby returned to her life, Rachel depended on her now mother-in-law for maternal influence. It was embarrassing to tell Carole that they had been unsuccessful in their attempts. Finn was her only biological son, and yet she was unable to give him a child and Carole a grandchild. But Carole simply wrapped her in a hug, holding her tightly and stoking her hair.
"Sometimes it takes time, sweetheart." She whispered. "Chris and I got married right out of school, and he wanted a family right away. It took almost a year before Finn came along, but it was worth the wait."
"Oh Carole, I feel like such a failure."
"I know it's hard, but you can't give up. You aren't a failure. Now is just not your time." When Rachel looked up she could see that Carole had tears in her eyes, and she felt a sudden rush of gratitude for her husband's mother.
The two women hastily dried their eyes as Finn and Burt entered the room talking about football, and they both reached for dishes to take to the table before issue orders for the men to carry the chicken and the large bowl of potatoes to the table. Neither was particularly enthusiastic about their husbands seeing teary eyes and worrying about them. The conversation turned back to Thanksgiving and their plans; Santana and Puck were supposed to come so that Santana would not have to cook. Rachel's fathers would be coming for the holiday that week, but they couldn't stay for more than the day of because Hiram had a trial to prepare for the following Monday. Carole volunteered to come with them to the shelter's Thanksgiving lunch, and Rachel practically beamed.
It was good to see his wife smiling again, even if it was because of a joke at his expense. He was glad that his mom and step-father were staying for the week and that Rachel seemed to be bonding with his mom again. As they all talked and ate, Burt talked about perhaps running for one last term before retiring, and he could hear Rachel and his mom discussing the meal plan for Thanksgiving. Rachel had never cooked a turkey before, and yet she'd volunteered to bring two turkeys to the shelter lunch in addition to cooking the turkey for their own dinner. His mom offered to guide her, and she almost flung her arms around the woman.
Burt and Carole had decided to do some Christmas shopping two days later, claiming to be taking advantage of being in New York. Finn and Rachel, however, were positive that the older couple had decided to leave the apartment for the day because they had a meeting with the lady from social services who had been doing the inspections and interviews as they worked to become foster parents. Finn and Rachel had already had two interviews and a primary inspection of the apartment, and today they were to meet to discuss her findings after reviewing their financial situation and speaking with character references. Rachel had been nervously cleaning the apartment for the past hour, and now she was pacing back and forth in front of the sofa.
"Rach, Rachel sweetheart please relax." Finn reached for her as she passed him for the fourth time. "Baby, things are going to be fine. We had great character references, and our financials were above average. There's no way she's going to tell us no."
"Finn, I—" But she was interrupted by a knock on their door; suddenly her hands were shaking almost too much answer it.
"I'll get it, babe." He kissed her forehead as he moved to answer the door, and he greeted the social worker with a smile and firm handshake. "Welcome back to our home, Miss Marus."
"Good afternoon Mr. Hudson, Mrs. Hudson." Miss Marus reminded Rachel of Coach Sylvester most of the time, even when she was trying to be nice, and as the older woman sat in the chair next to the sofa, Rachel felt another wave of nerves. "Today is your final interview and inspection; we will also be discussing some of the findings from our previous interviews and inspections."
"And after today?" Finn's voice shook slightly as he took a seat next to Rachel on the sofa, his hand quickly finding hers.
"After today your case will be officially reviewed and we will get back to you with our decision." Finn and Rachel nodded. "I'd like to begin with the inspection."
The tour of the apartment began almost immediately, with Miss Marus muttering that most foster parents have homes of their own. Rachel felt the familiar rush of nerves as the woman went over her home with a fine toothed comb. It was odd. She spent almost of her life on stage, with hundreds of eyes on her, and it never made her as nervous as she felt under Miss Amanda Marus' microscope. Each room was met with a series of questions and marks on a notepad, and when they reached the guest bedroom that would be converted into a child's room, the woman clucked her tongue.
"I see you are still using this as a guest room. Would you be able to convert it quickly if you were approved?"
"Of course. We've got plans to work on it right after Thanksgiving." Miss Marus nodded, making another note.
"I think I've seen enough." Rachel pulled in a breath. "There are a few things we need to discuss before I leave you to your holiday preparations. First of all, you have excellent character references; you're former coach and teacher spoke very highly of you, as did your employer Mr. Hudson and your director Mrs. Hudson. Several other people we spoke to gave glowing accounts of your character. Sister Theresa at the children's shelter spoke very highly of your relationships with children and your abilities, Mrs. Hudson."
"That's great!" Finn reached for Rachel's hand.
"I believe that you are excellent candidates for the foster system, and I only have a few concerns. One of those concerns is your career on Broadway. Such a busy schedule would surely hinder you in caring for a child."
"With all due respect, Miss Marus, I believe I can balance career and family quite well." Rachel tried not to sound insulted. "I do not think that it will be a problem at all. Are there any other concerns?"
"Most foster parents, in my experience, tend to own their own homes. Your home, while lovely, is an apartment. You don't have a backyard or much more than a spare bedroom."
"Honestly I don't think that should be a problem. We live really close to a couple of great parks, and the spare bedroom is pretty nice. You've seen the plans for the conversion." Finn couldn't help but jump to defend his home. "Our home is perfect for a family."
"I'm sure you believe that, Mr. Hudson." Miss Marus sounded dubious. "Now, I want to make sure you understand your role as foster parents. This is not the same thing as adopting, though sometimes foster parents meet a child they chose to adopt. You are giving a child a temporary home and preparing them for a more permanent placement."
Rachel nodded slowly. She knew what Miss Marus was talking about instantly; it was the one thing she was most concerned about, getting attached. What would happen if they fostered a child and she got attached? Could she handle giving that child up to a family willing to adopt?
vi.
"Aren't you worried about, y'know, getting attached? Cause you know the situation wouldn't be permanent." Santana handed Rachel a very large basket of rolls. "Here, for the love of all that is holy, take these things before I eat another one. Puckerman's son has me eating everything I can get my hands on, and I swear if I don't pop soon I'm going to die."
"I'm a little worried—ok, I'm very worried about getting attached, but I still think this is a good idea." Rachel chuckled as Santana rubbed her abdomen. "Finn and I want to adopt, and the gentleman at children's services says that this is a good start."
"Miss Rachel, you could 'dopt me." She nearly jumped out of her skin and dropped the rolls in her hands at the sound of Emma's voice. "If you want to 'dopt a little girl, you could 'dopt me."
"Emma sweetie, why don't you go help Mr. Puck with the tablecloths; he's not very good at it." Santana gave her a gentle nudge, hoping to prevent the tears that threatened to spill from her best friend's eyes.
"Ok Miss San." Emma smiled up at her and hurried off, leaving Rachel to let her very pregnant best friend attempt to wrap her arms around her.
Carole was acting as ring master of the circus that was final preparations for Thanksgiving lunch at the center. She was directing older children to help with setting up the serving tables and convincing younger children to stop trying to use the tablecloths as tents so that Puck and Finn could spread them. She felt a slight tug on her pants leg, and when she looked down she was greeted by a pair of remarkable bright blue eyes. Little girl introduced herself as Emma, and she was asking where she could find Mr. Puck. Carole smiled softly and pointed toward the tables were Puck was muttering under his breath and struggling to smooth a tablecloth.
"Right over there, sweetie."
"Thank you, ma'am." In a flash, Emma was off again, hurrying to 'help' Puck with the tablecloths.
Sister Theresa and Caroline both applauded the meal as the best Thanksgiving the shelter and center had seen in years as they all sat around tables decorated with centerpieces made by the children. Rachel beamed with pride, and Finn couldn't help but smile. Even Emma's presence at their table, seated between Rachel and his mom like a constant reminder of his failure to save her, couldn't dampen his mood. He reached to squeeze her hand, and she leaned over to kiss his cheek.
Rachel had insisted on setting the large dining room table with their best china, given to them as a wedding present from Carole because she had no daughters. This was the first holiday she'd hosted in her own home, and she wanted it to be perfect. Carole had helped her with the turkey, which had turned out beautifully, and Santana had brought the dressing and rolls made with her grandmother's recipes. Leroy Berry carried in the turkey, practically crowing about how amazing it smelled, and placed it in the center of the table. Hiram found Rachel in the kitchen, finishing up the mashed potatoes.
"Bunny, are you alright?" Rachel let out a shaky sigh; her fathers had been overjoyed at the possibility of grandchildren, adopted or not. "You've been very quiet tonight. I'm sorry we missed our special lunch."
"I'm fine, Papa; I'm just thinking." He pressed a kiss to her temple.
"Is this about what you told us before about becoming foster parents and possibly adopting?" Rachel nodded slowly. "Sweetheart, you of all people should know that being a child's biological parent isn't what makes you a real parent. It's what you do to be a good mother or father that matters. Adopting is a really great choice, and you and Finn will make terrific parents to any child."
"I know, Papa. I just—" But Burt and Puck came into the kitchen to pick up the wine and glasses, and Rachel couldn't bring herself to finish. "I love you."
Hiram kissed her cheek, and she scooped up the bowl of potatoes, handing them to her father with a smile. She followed him to the dining room with a bowl of green beans and placed them on the table before taking a seat between Finn and LeRoy. There was a kind of warmth filling the room, and Rachel looked around at the table full of her family. The only thing missing was a child of her own. She reached for Finn's hand, and they began the meal by each stating something they were thankful for in their lives. Rachel was pleasantly surprised when even Puck participated in the little ritual without rude comments about how stupid it was or mentioning that he was thankful for something like being badass or not being in jail.
"I met the sweetest little girl today." Carole was saying, and Rachel's eyes widened. "I'm sure you've seen her at the center, Rachel. She's got the brightest blue eyes and the sweetest smile. I think her name was Emma."
"Yes," Rachel bit her lip. "She's the little girl Finn and I told you about. I brought her home so that I could take her to the doctor."
"Sure is a shame about that little girl." LeRoy let out a soft sigh. "I just hate the idea of any child suffering like that. Every child should have a home and a family; every child should be loved."
Hiram kicked him under the table, and he jumped slightly, almost spilling his wine. He'd forgotten for a moment that Emma was a sensitive topic for his daughter and son-in-law. Carole quickly changed the subject, saving Rachel from bursting into tears, and Finn was eternally grateful. He couldn't help but think about the way she always seemed to pop up in their lives and wonder what that might mean.
vii.
The snow was starting to fall as he hurried to the center. Traffic was so bad that he'd had his cab stop half a block away so he could walk the rest of the way. Their approval had come already, and while he'd promised Rachel that they would open it together, he just couldn't wait until she returned home to find out what was in the large manila envelope that had arrived. It was surprising how quickly the response came; he'd been expecting to wait until the new year for an answer. When he arrived at the center Rachel was coming out of Caroline's office, first aid kit in hand, and she was shaking her head. Finn thought he heard the words 'group home', and he wondered what that meant.
"I'm sorry Rachel. Her case worker says that if she isn't ready for a family situation she's not a good candidate for placement. I know it's not ideal." Caroline sounded exhausted.
"But a group home? Caroline, Emma is four years old; she needs stability and a family, not some home full of fifteen troubled children." Rachel hissed.
"Three families have met with her in the past two weeks, and none of them have been able to connect with her. I think—"
"She connected with us." The words slipped out of his mouth before he could stop them. "She connected with us right away."
"Finn?" Rachel lifted an eyebrow, and Finn raised the envelope in his hand. "Did we get approved?"
"We're approved!" Rachel flung her arms around him, nearly knocking him off his feet. "We got the paperwork today."
"Congratulations!" Caroline smiled brightly. "That's great news."
"Baby, we could—we could help her." Finn wasn't sure where it was coming from, but something just felt right. "We connected with Emma, Rach, and we could help her. She needs us."
"You mean?" Finn nodded slowly as he lowered his wife back to the floor. "We could take her in, Finn. We could be her family, for a little while at least."