Hey guys, second chapter up. Thanks for the follows and reviews, hope you enjoy...

"It was warm, I remember that. I was in a small courtyard, with the sun shining down on me."

They were in Varric's permanently rented room at the Hanged Man. The dwarf was sat at the table, his tankard hand resting gently on the wooden surface, as he watched Fenris shift uneasily on his feet.

"There's a girl in front of me, red hair. She's taller than me and looking at me as if she knows me."

"Your mother?" Varric offered, listening to the tale intently.

"No." The elf shook his head. "I think too young, but I could be wrong. I'm not sure…"

Varric leaned backwards in his chair, resting his boots on a cushioned footstool. "So go on, you're in this courtyard with this girl… what is she doing?"

"She had red hair. An elf. And she frowned at me… but not in reprimand."

"What did she say?"

He grunted. "Leto…"

"Leto? What's Leto…?"

Fenris scowled at him and snatched his drink from the table. He took a long swig and snapped at his companion. "How should I know?!"

"Ok ok… you don't know. What happened then?" Varric leaned closer. The tightness of his friend's tone told the dwarf that this was a difficult subject for him to speak of, so he knew complacency or flippancy on his own part would likely cause the swordsman to shut off.

Fenris gave a heavy sigh and his shoulders drooped. He looked almost vulnerable. If you could ignore the huge sword and spiked mail armour, at any rate. "I wish I knew. I know there was more, but I can't reach it. It's like the memory has been stripped from me, no matter how hard I tried to recall. Before I knew it I was back with Hawke."

Varric couldn't help but notice the disappointment in the man's voice when he mentioned her name. To his surprise, he found himself irritated by it. "I would have thought that that's where you would want to be?"

Fenris blinked. "And how exactly have I offended you?"

Varric wasn't sure he could answer him in a way he would understand. "I'm just a little uncertain, Elf, why you would rather reach for the past than take what's in front of you." He paused, silently debating whether to leave it there, but his irritation won out. "Waiting for you to make up your damned mind, I would like to add."

"This was a bad idea," Fenris groaned. "You don't understand."

"Then educate me." Varric leaned back, his tone carrying a decidedly harsher edge than earlier.

"Danarius has gone to great lengths to ensure my misery and compliance."

"Yes, I don't think there's anyone in Hightown who doesn't know that…"

There was a pause, and the dwarf couldn't tell if he had offended the elf or upset him. "What if he takes Hawke from me?"

"Um… what?" It was Varric's turn to blink in surprise. Although there were many chinks in the ex-slave's armour, it was unheard of for him to point them out himself.

"What if he took her from me? The one thing that makes my life something… more. How could I even go on?"

A silent and heavy moment passed between the two. "I hope the Maker broke the mould when he produced you, Elf, I'm not sure the world could cope with many more."

"You're not taking me seriously-!"

"It would be like… a Blight of Brood…" Varric chuckled to himself, "I think I like that…" He trailed off, repeating the phrase under his breath.

The mirth was masked when he caught sight of the swordsman's black expression.

"Oh come on, you've got to admit it sounds a little weak? Take Hawke from you? And how do you propose he would do that? Hawke's a big girl, she can take care of herself. And if you dare to suggest otherwise to her…"

"I know, but…" He sighed again, softly this time, and began absently pacing the length of the room. When he spoke it was with a note of regret. "I found refuge from him before... It did not stop him from reclaiming me."

"What happened to …?"

"They did not meet happy endings." He anticipated the question and cut it off abruptly, leaving Varric in no doubt as to the fate of those who had dared help him. "Any happiness I have ever known has been taken from me. Either by force, or by trickery and magic."

"Fenris, you can't let your past keep Hawke from you."

The elf stopped pacing and stood staring out of the window. "I cannot grieve for what I will never know, but I can know that I should. I can still be haunted by ghosts even though I don't know who they are."

"Hawke won't accept that…"

"I know…" he turned his head and shot Varric a serious look. "That's why you're not going to tell her."

Varric grunted. "Well I've got to tell her something."

"Make something up, I hear you're good at it."

"So… that's it? You're pushing Hawke away from you because you're frightened someone might take her from you."

"I'm aware it sounds stupid…"

"It doesn't just sound stupid. Your grand plan is to make yourself and Hawke miserable because some crazy mage has an obsession with glow in the dark elves… Geez, even Blondie doesn't get this depressing…."

"The day I kill him. That's the day I'll tell her. Nothing will stand between us then."

"And what if someone else puts on the moves in the meantime? You remember what happened with Prince Charming, I assume…?"

"It depends on that person." His face took on a dark look. "On whether they deserve her."

"And there's no way I can change your mind?"

"I cannot be with her whilst looking over my shoulder all the time…"

"I'll take that as a 'no', then?"

"It's for the best."

Varric stared him down for a minute, and growled to himself in frustration when the elf's gaze did not flicker. "You're one stubborn bastard, I'll give you that."

"I'll do what it takes to protect her. Is your curiosity sated yet?"

"That's something I cannot even begin to fathom right now."

"Good. Your turn."

"My turn for what?" The dwarf asked innocently.

Fenris raised his mug to his smirking lips with a languid motion that made dwarf suddenly uneasy. "You know 'what', time to make good on that trade, dwarf…"

"'Trade' is dependent on the quality of the merchandise… if I can't even tell Hawke your story then what good is it to me?"

"I could tell another story if you prefer?"

"I'm all ears, my broody friend."

"I could tell Aveline that you're stealing the Guard patrol rosters and selling them to the Coterie? I think that's an entertaining one…"

Varric's face dropped. "Um… Heh… Well now, Elf, what would you know about that?" The dwarf squirmed under the white-haired man's scrutiny, he ran a finger around his suddenly tight collar.

"The plans are on your bedside table and I saw you talking to Anya downstairs."

"… How do you know Anya?"

"I pay to have the docks watched for any signs of the arrival of my former Master. Now stop changing the subject."

"Fine!" The dwarf shook his head, accepting the defeat. A little annoyed at himself for leaving such obvious clues. "I'll tell you… but if you ever tell a soul you'll regret it."

Fenris leaned in to greet Varric's serious gaze with his own. "That's fine. The same goes for you."

"Well, then… where to begin…?"

"Bianca was beautiful. Had the brightest eyes you ever saw… and the cutest nose… we went everywhere together. I couldn't bear to be parted from her, and neither could she from me.

"But one day… business called, and I had to leave her with the boys. Now, you've got to understand something Elf, this was long before I'd made a name for myself here in Kirkwall. I was not the charming, well-spoken and debonair dwarf you see before you now; I was brash, and naïve… and still with the Carta.

We lived in the sewers, and the mission, well, it was too dangerous to take her along. I'll never forget it.

I returned and she was simply gone. I looked high and low, all through the sewers, every ally in the city. No trace.

The gang I left her with told me that she had run away."

Varric rested his head in his palm and rubbed his eyes. "They said that, but I knew better.

"So when they left for the latest cargo hit I searched the camp and questioned the half-wit they left with their gear. And that's how I found out…"

Varric sighed heavily and deeply, and he glanced back up towards his captive audience. "The bastards… they killed her… and ate her…"

Rather than empathy however, the elf's eyebrows sprung up his forehead. "They ate her…?" He enquired sceptically.

"Swear down..." He affirmed.

"Was…'Bianca' by any chance, not a fellow dwarf?"

"What difference does that make…?"

"Was she, in fact, your pet nug?"

"How dare you! Pets have a very special place in the heart, Elf. That night I went and bought a crossbow and when they returned I shot them all. After that, I called her, Bianca." He paused for effect. "Well, there it is, Elf. There's my story."

Fenris' lips were pursed. Varric took a swig from his tankard before bothering to respond to his study. "What?"

"Hawke's favourite colour is green."

"No it's not! Everyone knows that Hawke's favourite colour is…"

"See? I can spout bullshit too."

"Now just what is it that you've got against nugs?"

"You're a conman, dwarf. Remind me not to trust you with my back in the future." The chair scraped as the swordsman rose to stand.

"That's a little extreme, isn't it?" Varric spluttered.

"No. We exchanged words of honour, now you have what you want and you have taken yours back. Your words I mean, not your honour. I'm not convinced you had any of that to begin with." He moved to the door.

"Jeez! Sit down. Maker! A man is allowed to have his secrets you know."

"Then a man shouldn't trade with them."

With that, the elf opened the door with a scowl and stalked out of the room. "Hold up Elf," Varric called after him, voice serious enough to make him pause. "If you're dead set on this, shout the barkeep over and take a seat."

"No tricks?"

"No tricks. Just cold hard truths and lots of booze."

Fenris found himself walking back into the room and taking a seat, despite his better judgement. "I'm listening."

Varric leaned forwards in his chair, his fingers steepled together. "You'll need to hear the whole story…"