Chapter X

Brynn Wydd, Wales

Charlotte Devane was pacing in the bedroom of Alex's cottage.

She was furious.

"I can't believe she actually did this! I want her on a flight to New York city in 48 hours or less," she told Dr. Lewellyn, the same physician that had helped Alex deliver Max and was now in Alex's bedroom fitting her with an intravenous tube while listening to his employer's rage.

"I'm afraid that's just not possible," he replied dryly.

"Why not? You said she woke up a couple of hours ago, that means she'll live doesn't it?"

"She was only lucid for a few seconds before she lost consciousness again. The fact that she is alive at all is no small miracle. That kind of massive blood loss would have killed most people. She should be monitored in a hospital in the event of cardiac arrest," he tried to explain.

"Hospital? What am I paying you for? I don't care what you have to do, I want her on her feet in two days." Charlotte started mumbling to herself, "Maybe if we use the jet, or have her take the Concorde we could give her another day…and buy ourselves a few hours."

Dr.Lewellyn had no genuine care or concern for Alex, but just then he felt a twinge of sympathy for her. For the misery of having been raised by a woman who valued her only for what she could do for her.

The door of the bedroom suddenly opened and Max came running in. His nose was runny and there were food stains on his sweater. He ran up to Alex and jumped on the bed, next to her.

His presence increased Charlotte's ire. "What the hell is that boy doing here?" she demanded and she saw Justin running into the room after Max

"I'm sorry, Ms. Devane. He ran away when I wasn't looking."

Justin tried to grab him but Max was too fast. He was already on the bed and started shaking Alex in an attempt to wake her up.

"Mum…Mum, go up," he begged her frantically.

"Stop it!" Dr.Lewellyn lifted the boy off the bed, and, much to the physician's dismay, he started crying. He saw Alex open her eyes in response to the noise.

"Max?" she whispered, her voice barely audible. Dr.Lewellyn tried to hand the boy to Justin, but Max wriggled himself out of his grasp and jumped back on the bed.

"Mum?" he looked at her, his voice timid and unsure, frightened that his mother was pale and still, and so different from how he was used to seeing her.

Alex tried to hold on to him and saw the thick white bandages around her wrists.

Her arms had no strength and she was unable to grasp him. "Max…my baby," she whispered. At last Justin managed to get a firm hold of the boy.

"Get him out of here!" Charlotte ordered and Justin took him away, indifferent to his screams.

Charlotte looked at Alex and saw her close her eyes again, too weak to protest his abduction this time. She rolled her eyes and turned back to Dr.Lewellyn, "Fine. You have 72 hours. If she is not fit to travel by then, you can consider your employment terminated. Is that understood?"

Charlotte's fits of rage were nothing new to Dr. Lewellyn and he answered her calmly "Of course, Ms.Devane."

New York City, New York

As soon as he heard news of his brother's collapse in New York, Edmund Grey flew down to see Dimitri.

When he entered his brother's hospital room, he saw Dimitri standing next to a mirror, fully dressed in one of his custom tailored Zegna suits, adjusting his tie.

"What in the world are you doing?" Edmund demanded, staring at him in disbelief. "Aren't you supposed to be in bed?"

Edmund had to admit that Dimitri looked perfectly fine. In fact, he exuded his customary commanding presence, a natural charisma that had little to do with his actual royal title.

"I'm fine Edmund. I discharged myself this morning."

"You scared us all to death when we heard you collapsed at the your Board of Directors meeting. Are you telling me that was nothing?"

Dimitri smiled at him, "You have to admit I couldn't have picked a better place to faint. I was surrounded by twelve of the best doctors in the world. Seriously, little brother, there is no need for you or anyone else to worry. They did a whole battery of tests and found absolutely nothing wrong with me. I'm in perfect health."

"Men in perfect health don't just pass out in the middle of the day," Edmund retorted. "And frankly, I'm not surprised. You've been keeping an insane schedule for the last three years. When you're not jetting from country to country to oversee your investments, you're attending meetings or galas or god knows what. Have you even had one day off in the last month?"

Dimitri frowned at him, "Look, I appreciate your concern, but I don't need a lecture from you. I'm doing what I'm doing because it's my lifeblood now. It gives me satisfaction to know somewhere on this wretched planet I'm able to make a difference and that I'm not just another millionaire playboy sitting on the Cote D'Azur with his expensive toys. Did you know the Andrassy Foundation helped distribute seven million dollars worth of AIDS medication in central and southern Africa, in the last six months alone? These are people that would be dead, if it were not for the Foundation! Dead or dying, Edmund!"

Edmund looked at his brother with admiration, "Look, you don't have to convince me what you're doing is exceptional. You have the biggest heart I know. But do you ever ask yourself why you're really doing all this? Is it because you're trying to make Alex proud?"

Dimitri met his gaze, taking his time to answer. "Edmund, if I confide something to you, will you promise to take me seriously?"

Edmund didn't hesitate, "Of course, always."

"Do you think it's possible for two people to share an unbreakable bond? A bond that transcends time, distance and even death."

Edmund gave Dimitri a puzzled look, "I'm not sure what you mean by that."

Dimitri looked past Edmund now and stared into space, "There are times when I feel, without a doubt, that Alex is here with me, that she is still a living part of me."

Edmund shook his head sadly, "Dimitri…"

"No. Let me finish! When I passed out yesterday, I felt that Alex needed me. I felt that she took every ounce of my strength because she needed it to survive. I didn't fight it, Edmund. I gave it to her gladly. If I had wanted to, I could have stopped myself from collapsing, but I didn't because I felt she needed whatever energy, strength, vitality, you name it, whatever I had in me at that moment and I gave it to her because somehow I knew she desperately needed it."

Edmund stared at his handsome brother with obvious concern, not knowing what to say.

Dimitri went on, "It's not the first time Edmund. These 'sensations' have happened to me at least a dozen times over the past three years." He saw Edmund's skeptical look, "I know you must think I'm crazy. It's absurd and makes no sense. I realize all that. But I'm telling you that what I feel is real and sometimes it consumes me. Like it did yesterday."

Edmund tried to be both gentle and as open-minded as he could, "Look, I know you're not crazy Dimi. I know how I felt after I lost Maria. In fact, at one time I even thought I saw her standing in the same room as me. Whatever it is, I understand and I want to help you, I just don't want to see you start to torture yourself into thinking she could still be alive. Alex is gone. It's been almost three years."

"They never found her body, Edmund!"

Edmund frowned and turned away, "That's one discussion I'm not having with you again and I don't think you're doing yourself a favor by entertaining these kind of thoughts." His brother's inability to see reason where Alex's death was concerned frustrated him, most of all because it kept his brother tied to the past. Living there, instead of the present and the future. "Do you really think if Alex were alive all this time she wouldn't have let you know?"

"What if someone is preventing her from telling me?" Dimitri would not let up that easily.

" 'What if, what if…' you could ask yourself 'what if this, what if that,' until you go insane and it's still not going to bring Alex back!"

Dimitri tightened his lips, and Edmund nearly regretted his outburst. Because of it, it might be a while before his brother confided in him again. Edmund wanted to curse himself.

"I guess you're right," Dimitri conceded, "Maybe I just want her back so badly, I would entertain whatever crazy notion it takes to give me hope."

"I am right about this, and I'm glad you're starting to see it. There is, however, also something I wanted to tell you Dimitri."

Dimitri seemed glad that the topic had changed. "What is it?"

"I'm going to ask Brooke English to marry me next week," he told him with a broad smile.

Dimitri looked shocked. "Really? I feel so out of touch…I knew you'd been…together a lot." He grinned. "But I had no idea you'd fallen in love again. Am I really so unaware of what's going on in the life of my family. Maybe you're right and I am too wrapped up in my work. Congratulations, little brother." He stood up to embrace Edmund. "I'm very happy for you. That's incredible news."

Edmund was grinning too now, "It is. I'm very happy. And that's all I want for you…that same happiness."

"Don't you worry about me. I'm content, especially now that these fine doctors here have assured me that I'll probably live for another few decades."

"Maybe you could ask Erica Kane to marry you, and we could have a double bash at the Wildwind chapel," Edmund told him, only half-joking.

Dimitri raised his eyebrows.

"It might be just the sort of closure you need," Edmund added.

"I don't know, little brother, Erica's guest list might fill up the entire chapel and I'm not sure Brooke would appreciate that. Besides, I've got a feeling I'm getting too old for marriage."

"We'll see Dimi. We'll see. Never say never where love is concerned."

Edmund picked up his brother's leather sports bag and led him out of the hospital room.

Brynn Wydd, Wales

Almost two days after finding Alex on the floor of the cottage's bathroom, Heidi went to visit her in the bedroom. Alex was asleep and Dr.Lewellyn sat at a desk in the dimly lit room, reading a medical journal.

"Is it alright, if I come in?" Heidi asked the doctor.

He gave her a cold look. "Actually, I could use a break. Stay here and watch her until I come back. I won't be far, if anything happens."

He got up and left.

Heidi sat down on the bed, and watched as Alex woke up.

"Heidi?…Is that you?" Alex could sense her presence before she heard her voice.

Heidi took one of Alex's hands in her own, "Yes, it's me. I'm here."

"Max?" She whispered. "How is he?"

"He's fine. The man that took him left him with me last night. Max was really frightened when he first came back to me, but he's ok now."

Alex looked at Heidi and saw that her face was a mask of hurt, anger, and fear. "Heidi…what about you? Are you okay?"

The Swiss woman shook her head and Alex saw that she was on the verge of tears. "No, Alex. No, I'm not okay. Every time I close my eyes I see you, lying on the floor and there is blood everywhere. So much blood!"

Suddenly the guilt of what she had done to the young woman hit Alex. "Oh Heidi, I'm so sorry you had to see what you saw. I never wanted you to find me like that… not like that."

She knew from what Lewellyn told her about the amount of blood loss, that Heidi had obviously found her much later than Alex had intended.

Heidi looked at her, her expression a mixture of sadness and accusation. "How could you do something like that? You have such a wonderful son! You would leave him all alone in this world without his mother and his father? I don't understand Alex. If things were so unbearable for you, why…why did you never let me help you?"

Alex wanted to tell her everything just then, including the fact that she never meant to kill herself, but was afraid that Lewellyn was still nearby. That he might walk back into the room and overhear everything. "Heidi, what I did…it's not what you think."

"I can't work for you anymore. I'm sorry."

Alex couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Heidi, please. Not now… please. I need you…"

"I love both you and Max, and you are one the kindest person I've ever known. But what I saw, it hurt too much. I cannot even look at you right now. I'm sorry, Alex. I will stay for another two weeks, until you recover or until you find someone new, whichever one comes first."

She stood up to leave the room but Alex tried to stop her. The act accidentally ripped out the IV that Dr.Lewellyn had put on her arm.

"Heidi, please let me explain to you," Alex called after her. She wanted to run after her, but the mere act of standing up already took so much effort, she couldn't fathom taking an actual step.

"I'm so sorry Alex, but I can't do this anymore…" Heidi closed the door behind her.

Alex realized now that she had gotten up too quickly. The room spun around her. She was about to fall to the ground when she felt Dr.Lewellyn's arms underneath hers.

"What in the world are you doing?" he lectured her , "Don't you know better? Are you trying to finish the job, or what?"

He helped her back into the bed. "The next time you rip this out, you can put it back in yourself." He adjusted her IV as roughly as he could without doing any actual damage.

Alex winced in pain. "Where did you learn about patient care, from the lab notes of Hitler's doctors?" she asked him angrily.

It was obvious that Lewellyn hated taking care of her and Alex suspected it was in no small part because he hated her past professional success. "Why would God waste his time putting such a brilliant mind in the body of such an unstable, insignificant woman?" he asked her aloud, as if wanting to confirm her suspicions.

Then he went back to his journal, waiting for her to fall back asleep.

"Get some rest," he snarled under his breath. "You'll need it if I'm going to stick you on a plane to New York in less than 24 hours."