SuperSailorCharon: Hopefully this next one-shot doesn't sound too cracky, but I had a friend put in a request for a chapter about Germany babysitting Sealand and then another friend (a Germany fan) thought it was a hilarious idea! I'd like to thank Chobi-chan89 for leaving me a review. This chapter is for you!

Germany was sitting at home reading a German newspaper one day when there came a knock on his door. He set the paper down and rose up to open the front door where he found a distraught-looking England. There was a little boy standing next to England that looked a lot like him and was dressed in a sailor suit.

"Hello there!" Sealand chirped.

"Take him! Take this bloody brat! I can't deal with him right now!" England snapped. "I'm tired of hearing 'Oh! I'm a country! I'm a country!' Bloody git can piss off!" England took a deep breath and added more calmly, "I'm going to America's house. I'll be back for Sealand in about a week."

"Vhy are you leaving him here at my house?!" Germany asked in shock. "Vait! Come back!"

Germany groaned loudly and stared down at Sealand.

"I'm Germany," Germany said reluctantly. "Velcome to my home."

"I think I drove England crazy again," Sealand said. "Well, that happens, you know!"

"I don't understand," Germany grunted, inviting the little country into his house. Italy was already staying with him for a little while, so a relaxing week at home was already too much to ask. "Vhy did Britain leave you here, again?"

"Well, Britain doesn't trust me on my own ever since I stole from his liquor stash. He would've left me with Papa Sweden and Finland, but they went on their honeymoon. And I've always wanted to visit your house and a lot of other places in the world, too, so Britain left me here!"

"All right," Germany sighed. He didn't know anything about childrearing. In fact, it had been hundreds and hundreds of years since he himself had been a child. He thought for a moment about parents he had seen throughout his country and how they raised their children. "Just don't make a mess and don't stay awake too late."

"It's not like I don't babysit Italy sometimes," Germany murmured to himself. He thought, This little kind* had better not make a mess in my house.

"Oh, and stay out of the basement," Germany warned. "I don't want you going down there."

"Don't worry! I won't! I know that's where you keep all your torture devices!" Sealand said eagerly.

"Ja…torture devices…" Germany said nervously.

Luckily, babysitting Sealand wasn't too terrible, although Sealand and Italy proved to be a very annoying pair when together.

"Patty cake, patty cake! Baker's man! Bake me a cake as fast as you can! Roll it and pat it and mark it with a…" Italy and Sealand sang together before they were cut off by an irritated Germany.

"Nein! Find something quieter to do!" Germany snapped at them. Germany went back to reading a book with a cold, frothy mug of beer while Sealand went to watch TV and Italy played with Pooky.

The rest of the week was relatively quiet. Sealand spent most of his time watching television and eating chocolate. He would often help out around the house whenever Italy wanted to make pasta. To Germany's pleasure, sometimes Sealand occasionally offered to help clean.

"Thank you for helping me dust the furniture," Germany said flatly. "Vould you like a beer? I realize you're a little young, but here it is not uncommon to begin drinking beer when you're about fourteen."

"I don't like beer!" Sealand cried. "Could I have a melon soda?"

"I told you!" Germany snapped. "You cannot get melon soda here!"

"Oh, well could we at least have some more of that chocolate cake you made the other night? German chocolate is really, really good!" Sealand gushed.

"You shouldn't be eating so many sweets!" Germany replied. "It's bad for your health! No more television, either!"

"But why?" Sealand asked in dismay. "I love television! And the internet, too!"

"Nein! You are going to train with me tomorrow! It is important to exercise, especially vhile you are young!" Germany said sharply.

The next morning, Germany woke up Italy and Sealand at around five to train.

"Count off!" Germany cried.

"Uno!"

"Two!"

"And I'm trine," Germany said flatly. "Today we are going to run laps!"

"I hate jogging! Germany! Can we please do something else? Anything else!" Italy pouted.

"Nein! If you do not finish your laps, we will not be going to lunch until you do!" Germany barked.

"I'll race ya!" Sealand cried as he sped past slow-jogging Italy.

The day was spent running laps, doing push-ups and crunches, and various other strenuous activities. Italy was worn-out, but at the same time somewhat used to this physical activity. Meanwhile, Sealand, who had shown so much zeal at the start of the training, was now exhausted and fast asleep in the spare bedroom in Germany's house.

"He didn't even want to eat dinner," Germany observed as he closed the door to the spare bedroom while the micro-nation slept soundly. "And we were having wurst tonight, too."

Germany was about to start cooking the wurst when there came a knock on the door. He opened it to find England looking much-less flustered than he did a week ago when he dropped Sealand off.

"Sealand is upstairs sleeping," Germany told England. "Did you enjoy your visit with America?"

"No, but I suppose it had to be done," England sighed. "Wait, did you say Sealand was sleeping?"

"Ja," Germany said. "I spent today training him and wore him out. Let me wake him up so you can take him home."

A grin rose up on England's face.

"Remind me to leave him at your house more often," England quipped.

Germany just sighed and shook his head.

* "Kind" in this context is German for "child".