A/N: Hey, I have a first reviewer! Thank you so much for reviewing and I'm glad you like the story. Anyway, here's the next chap. Hope you like it!
Disclaimer: I do not own Sherlock Holmes or the song My heart is brokenby Evanescence.
Singing
I will wander 'till the end of time torn away from you.
He was visiting the grave again. He knew he shouldn't, but John just couldn't help himself. He needed to feel close to Sherlock and visiting his grave seemed to help.
Well, at least a little.
I pull away to face the pain.
I close my eyes and drift away.
Over the fear that I will never find
A way to heal my soul.
And I will wander 'till the end of time
Torn away from you.
Admitting he was in love with Sherlock had made everything worse. He was now seeing him everywhere he went. Well, he thought he was seeing him. They were all really just small glimpses of curly back hair or a blue scarf. Or a voice that sounded a bit like Sherlock's.
But every time, John couldn't bring himself to ignore it. He had to check. He couldn't let that tiny ray of hope go.
He couldn't say goodbye.
My heart is broken
Sweet sleep, my dark angel
Deliver us from sorrow's hold
John kept hanging onto every small reminder of Sherlock. He wore his clothes and used his hair products to smell like him, and held his violin for hours to just be reminded of him.
He had even taken residence in Sherlock's old room and slept in his bed to feel close to him.
I can't go on living this way
And I can't go back the way I came
Chained to this fear that I will never find
A way to heal my soul
And I will wander 'till the end of time
Half alive without you
The realization of being in love with Sherlock had permanently chained John to where he was. Drowned in sorrow and misery. Searching for ghosts.
He just couldn't let him go.
My heart is broken
Sweet sleep, my dark angel
Deliver us
Every night he slept in Sherlock's bed he imagined him sleeping peacefully next to him. He imagined holding him like in his dream and just being content with having him there. His dark angel.
But it was just a dream.
It was only an illusion.
An illusion John should let go.
Change, open your eyes to the light
I denied it all so long, oh so long
Say goodbye, goodbye
But he couldn't.
Not after denying his feelings for Sherlock for so long.
This was his punishment.
A punishment he wanted to end.
A punishment he could take no longer.
My heart is broken
Release me, I can't hold on
Deliver us
My heart is broken
Sweet sleep, my dark angel
Deliver us from sorrow's hold
And after nearly two years…
John broke.
AN/: Thanks for reading! Please review and give me some feedback on the story.
- Dalnim