A Future Darker
Episode 5, Part 1
By Neoraichu
All Characters are the property of Frederator Studios, and I hope that the Manstache is something I dreamed up myself.
...
SheZow climbed off the Manstache's chest. Looking around, they could tell that it was cloudy, and too dark to be day unless the clouds were truly thousands of feet thick. There also seemed to be no man-made lights within their sight. In fact, they couldn't even see any buildings reasonably close to them.
"Where do you think we are?" asked the Manstache.
"Menacing Manster said he was condemning us to the future."
"Well, that still doesn't tell us where we are," he replied evenly, "It doesn't look anything like the place we just left."
"No," agreed SheZow, "It doesn't. But Sheila should be able to pinpoint our location in a matter of seconds." She raised her ring and spoke into it, saying, "Sheila? Come in Sheila." SheZow paused for a response that did not seem to be coming.
"Could the computer be out of range?"
"I should be able to communicate anywhere on Earth. We were even able to talk to each other across the ocean of time itself... at least while I was in the Shehicle."
"You can time travel?"
"The Shehicle can," she replied, "but I've only had to do it once so far."
"That sounds so cool."
"I know," she replied excitedly.
"Perhaps we should figure out where we are then?" asked Manstache helpfully.
"A good idea."
The two of them looked around for some time.
"Say," observed Manstache, "It looks like there's some kind of ruins in that direction," which was accompanied by helpful pointing.
"Let's check it out," she replied.
As they drew nearer, they figured by the layout of ruins and the broken streets around them that they were in the ruins of a suburban neighborhood. There was no sign of anything that looked like a street sign, even down to the lack of sign posts. Most of the buildings had been reduced to rubble less than 6 inches high, if you didn't count the miscellaneous plants that had grown in the ruins... except for one house. That one was less ruined, having some walls standing waist high on the Manstache, and something even higher towards the middle of the house.
"I think there's something important here," said SheZow, "almost like my SheSP is trying to tell me something. Help me clear away this debris and try to see what's under all of this."
Manstache nodded, and proceeded to use his mustache powers to help move the brick, mortar and wood mess. After an hour or so of hard work, they found something.
"I think it's the entrance to the SheLair," she said.
"Most fortunate," he agreed.
"Lets see if it's still usable."
The two of them approached the Lair's entrance.
...
The SheLair was in ruins. Sheila was smashed almost beyond recognition.
"What a mess," said SheZow, "Who could have done this?"
"Any villain we know could have done this after we... were sent away."
"Most villains I know aren't clever enough to find it... of course, shear dumb luck is another matter entirely. We better check to see if any of this stuff still works."
The two of them split up and searched, but in vain. They were close to giving up when the Manstache said, "Hey, there's an envelope hidden in the back of the remains of Sheila."
"Bring it here, and we'll read it. It's probably meant for us anyways."
He opened the letter, and noted, "This paper is really fragile and yellow. It must have been hidden her for perhaps a couple of decades. The message is hand written, and in a style that I'm not familiar with."
"Let me see it," SheZow replied, "If it's Kelly's handwriting, I can decipher it." Looking at the note, she said, "Definitely Kelly's handwriting. It says..."
Dear SheZow and/or Manstache,
If you are reading this, it is most likely that Gerald, Maz and I are no more. The battle for Megadale and the Earth itself is not going well. Dark Snide-R is proving too powerful to battle without you. In spite of our best efforts, as well as the military, the police, and the other superheroes in the world, the villain is winning. It seemed that the villain was waiting in the shadows, ready to strike when the Menacing Manster used the last of his dark man powers to send you both away. He turned to dust and blew away after performing this last act of spite.
Sheila was hacked shortly thereafter by either by the new villain, or some goon in their employ. This led to the destruction of the Shehicle, and any chance of using it to search Time and Space for the two of you.
We have created a new She-weapon from the remains of the Shehicle and the SheLair. Since what we really had to work with was mainly plans for Russian gunship helicopters, the new vehicle has been christened the She-Hind.
Since its power is derived from that of the SheZow Ring, we can not run it without you. The exception is Sheila 2 . 0 . 3 . 6., which we deliberately designed to be completely incompatible with the original Sheila (in the hopes that it cannot be hacked like the first). We were hoping you would have come back much sooner to aid in the battle for the world. It seems we shall all too soon be under the iron heel of Dark Snide-R or dead.
There wasn't time to write a manual for the She-Hind, and it seems you probably would not read it even if we had. So there's a few help files that have been built into Sheila 2 . 0 . 3 . 6. These files are password protected, in case someone finds it with a stolen SheZow Ring. The password is ten letters, and related to how you and Manstache first worked together.
The She-Hind is hidden in a place which can only be reached with the SheZow Ring. We hope that you have it with you even if something should have happened to SheZow and her alter ego, though I pray with all my heart that they are okay.
Love, Kelly
"Oh Kelly!" choked SheZow as she read the letter, "Maz!"
"Oh Gerald," said Manstache, "I miss you, big brother. I wish you could have loved me as much as I loved you."
"Dark Snide-R?" asked SheZow, "Is that one of your villains?"
"Never heard of them," he replied, "I take it they're not one of yours?"
"That's right. Has there been some Mastermind behind the scenes the whole time, setting us up for just that moment like when we beat the Menacing Manster?"
"That seems quite likely at this point."
"Our only chance is to find where Kelly and Gerald hid the She-Hind, use it to take care of Dark Snide-R, and then go back to the past to prevent them from rising to power in the first place. But I'm not sure what Kelly is talking about in the password."
"We battled together first in Downtown Megadale, but neither word is ten letters."
"Wait," she replied, "We battled against MegaMonkey and his mega-monkey minions. MegaMonkey has TEN LETTERS. I'm almost positive that that must be it."
"Something not obvious to anyone who doesn't fully know our past with each other."
"Now if I were going to hide a She-Hind, it would have to be somewhere fairly large and inconspicuous."
"I'd suggest looking in abandoned warehouses... but that's so cliché."
"But then Kelly and Gerald would hide it in a place that WE could find. I don't think our siblings give us much credit in the genius department."
"No, I suppose they don't."
"When I first tested my SheZow Powers, it was in a group of abandoned warehouses and factories. Kelly would figure I'd look in places that we've already been."
"I suppose Gerald would think along the same lines."
"It's gonna take a while to get there on foot," she mused.
"Not true," replied the Manstache, "I've never depended on a vehicle to get around. It also gets around the whole 'need a driver's license' thing."
"Weird, but I don't think a cop has ever asked to see SheZow's Driver's License. I guess they just assume I'm old enough and certified to drive as a Superhero."
"Smalltownsville must be stricter than Megadale."
"I guess," SheZow replied with a shrug, "Must have a lot more people to deal with."
Manstache shrugged as well.
(Interlude between the first part of the episode and the second! She-yeah!)
She-Hind the Scenes
Episode 5, Part 2
By Neoraichu
SheZow felt awkward having her new more girly body (with the mind and soul of Guy) being carried in the arms of the now more manly Manstache. Being a gentleman (with the soul and mind of Kelsey), he carried her sideways with one arm on her back just under the armpits, and the other holding her legs bent more than 90 degrees under the knee pits.
They were traveling under mustache power, but SheZow couldn't help but feel that his leaps were toned down to be easier on her. She could tell that he wasn't exerting himself very hard, as her ear pressed against his chest could clearly hear his slow, strong heartbeat. It was so comforting, almost like listening to the heartbeat of a mother while the baby is in the womb.
If she wasn't actively guiding Manstache about where to go, she might have drifted off to sleep in those big, strong, yet oddly comforting arms. Even the breeze, which caused her hair to trail behind them, was a cool comfort. But they were heading for the outskirts of Megadale, and there was just not enough time to 'slack off', as Gerald might say.
"There's ruins ahead," he said calmly, "and they look large enough to be warehouses and factories. Are we close?"
"Without the Shehicle and the ShePS, I have to guess, but I'd say we're close."
"Those building are to flattened to hide anything."
"Yeah, but our siblings are... were clever. The enemy wouldn't bother looking there either, if they were trying to find it. We have to look for signs of an underground structure, like an elevator shaft or something."
"I see," agreed the Manstache.
"Wait, there's people up ahead," noted SheZow, "and there's something wrong with them."
"We better sneak in on foot from here."
"No, not we," she replied, "Me. I have Vanishing Cream with Aloe. What they can't see won't bother them."
"Alright," he relented, "but promise to be careful. Promise you'll call for me if you need me." He sounded so concerned. So sincere.
"I promise," she said back, "No heroics."
He nodded as he landed, and then he let her down onto the ground. She took out the Vanishing Cream and disappeared in a mess of white goo.
"Oh," he mused, "That looks so... awkward."
"Say what?" said the now vanished SheZow.
"Oh it's nothing," he mused, "I hope that's not greasy or anything." Was the Manstache blushing?
"Of course not. I have to move around like this. What ever are you thin... OH!.. Uh... Never mind then... I have to get going now..."
"Good luck, Miss."
"Please... just call me SheZow."
"Good luck, SheZow."
"Thanks."
Now Invisible, SheZow crept ahead to see what the deal was with the men they observed. The men were moving oddly, and unnaturally. It almost seemed like they had almost no motor control skills. They didn't look healthy either. In fact, they looked like... 'ZOMBIES!' though SheZow, 'Who could have done this?'
"Damn it!" swore someone oddly familiar, "What is taking you brain-dead creeps so long?! Why did I let Dark Snide-R saddle me with you useless jerks?!" They walked in from the other side of the crowd from around a collapsed wall still large enough to hide them. While older... much older... SheZow new it could only be... 'SHEZAP?!' Yes, even after all the years that passed, she still wore the same costume (or more accurately, her 'anti-costume'. SheZap was the dark version of SheZow, after all).
Then suddenly, SheZap stopped. 'I hope its not her own SheSP,' thought SheZow. She looked around very intently, and then announced, "There's someone spying on us that I can't see! Flail around and grab anything you bump into if you can't see it!.. You brainless thugs should be good at at least that much... What or whoever it is, bring them TO ME!"
It was almost funny to dance around the Zombies, keeping out of their reach. It was like a game of pin the tail on the donkey, except the 'donkey' was a moving target. But while circling around one Zombie, she backed into another. When it grabbed her and pinned her arms, it seemed obvious that the Zombie's strength more than made up for their lack of grace and coordination.
SheZap pointed at the Zombie holding 'nothing', and said "Bring them to me! It's almost too much to hope that that coward SheZow is still around... so I can DESTORY her!"
SheZow gulped. She stomped on the Zombie's foot, but to no effect. 'I forgot,' she thought, 'Zombies don't feel pain, do they?'
SheZap reached behind a rock and lifted a bucket. "Well, if it's who I hope it is, then this should show them!" She splashed the Zombie and indirectly SheZow with a bucket of... well... let's just call it waste water?
SheZow spluttered as the Vanishing Cream washed off, "Oh! That's so gross!"
"After all these years," SheZap sighed, "I get to destroy YOU! I swore to Dark Snide-R that it would be ME who gets to ELIMINATE you once and for all!"
"I never took you for the patient type," said SheZow with a smirk.
"Wait a minute," said SheZap, "When the hell did you get TITS?! You're stacked more than even Tara was!"
"Wouldn't you like to know?" she replied with a laugh.
"You won't be laughing it up when I skewer your goody goody heart with my laser lipstick!"
SheZow gulped again, and said weakly, "What about your..."
"Zombie?! Hah, I doubt the brainless husk will even feel a thing!"
SheZow took a gamble. A huge gamble. "SHE-HIND!" she screamed at the top of her lungs, "COME TO ME NOW! AUTHORIZATION MEGAMONKEY!"
"No one's going to save your sorry be-" said SheZap before she was cut off by the shaking of the ground all around them.
The ground split under SheZow as massive doors opened upwards, throwing her and the Zombie back into the remains of a wall. Into the air arose the pinkest helicopter gunship that SheZow had ever seen in her life.
In a voice almost identical to Sheila, it announced, "ALPHA PRIORITY! Defend SheZow!" It deployed a number of She-weapons that boggled even the mind of SheZow herself, and she had seen plenty of 'GI Moe' action figures and combat vehicle toys to know ridiculously over armed when she saw it. "One hostile life sign detected! Other animate forms non-living! Setting priority to Anti-Material Mode!"
They was a deafening blaze of Shehineguns and Shehine Cannons. All Zombies but the one holding her were turned in a fine mulch in short order. SheZow wondered if SheZap was soiling herself at this point, as retreat was obviously on their mind.
"Damn you, SheZow!" came the curse, "I'll destroy you and your She-Hind as soon as I can get better reinforcements!"
"Requesting permission to destroy fleeing opponent," said She-Hind.
"Denied!"
"Accepted."
Just then, the arms holding her were ripped away. She looked around to see that the Manstache had used his mustache might to tear the Zombie apart.
"Goodness," he said, "You have all the best toys, don't you?"
"I sure do. She-Hind, park and let us in."
"Affirmative," replied the copter as it settled down and opened it's cargo door.