Chapter 7 – In and Out
For several moments nothing happened, and then Spock opened the door.
"Cadet Abbott," he said. "Come in."
She stepped into his dorm and stared. He had his own kitchen? By the look of it, it was fully-stocked, and a pot simmered on the stove. His living space was sparsely furnished but it was neat. There was a shelf filled with books, a large desk with a computer, a filing cabinet with six drawers and a large pile of papers. Seated at one of the dining chairs, closing a book, was another cadet.
"Hello," Zia said shyly. The cadet smiled and stood, her long black hair swinging behind her.
"Cadet Abbott, this is Cadet Uhura," Spock said as the women shook hands. "Cadet Uhura is one of the best cadets in my third-year xenolinguistics class, and Miss Abbott is one of my first-year physics cadets."
"Pleased to meet you," Uhura said, smiling.
"Does he tutor you too?" Zia asked.
"Oh." Uhura shook her head. "We're studying the three Romulan dialects this term, but I already know them, so Professor Spock was giving me a head start on Xindi, as we're learning their language next term. He gave me a book that would help." She held out the book she'd just closed. A Beginner's Guide to Xindi.
"Okay," Zia nodded.
"What about you?"
"I'd rather not talk about it, if that's okay," Zia muttered.
"Cadet," Spock said to Uhura, "it would be preferable that you do not mention this to anyone. It is a personal matter."
"Of course, Professor," Uhura nodded. She turned to Zia. "It was really nice meeting you. We should hang out sometime."
"Um, okay?"
Still smiling, Uhura walked to the door and left. Zia turned to Spock.
"Will she tell?" she asked.
"Miss Uhura has been my best cadet for three years," he said noncommittally. "I am confident she will not tell people of what transpired. Now, I was finishing the preparation of a meal when she came to borrow the book. Have you eaten?"
"Not yet. You told me not to."
"Excellent. I will serve you bertakk soup, a dish native to Vulcan."
Spock turned off his stove and spooned two servings of bertakk soup into bowls. He handed one to Zia and they sat at his table.
"What's it like being a professor?" she asked.
"It is surprisingly easy. I teach six classes every term, ranging from physics to linguistics to engineering." Spock fell silent and Zia sipped her soup. "Do you have any homework remaining?"
"No, I've completed it all," she said. "That periodic table took hours."
"That was the aim," he said. Was that a hint of smugness? "It was to get you used to the length of assessments. There will be several time-consuming homework pieces throughout the term."
She hesitated. "So… you're going to teach me to be a Vulcan?"
"Yes. However, you are tense, and quite nervous, so you must relax before we begin."
"You're aiming to get me comfortable around here?"
"Yes."
She blushed. "Um, thank you for doing this."
"You are welcome."
She savoured each bite and discovered with fascination that she was relaxing. It was strange that she would relax in her professor's dining room while eating with him and she was surrounded by his smell. But it had happened anyway, and she enjoyed the sensation of peacefulness. There was almost something unnatural about it…
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"Eating dinner," he replied.
"No, I mean to me."
His expression didn't change, but she sensed the ghost of amusement. "Our minds are still connected with the mind-meld, however slight, and I can project emotions onto you. For example, I am projecting peacefulness to calm you right now."
"Can I do that too?"
"Only with intense training, and even then, you may never be telepathic. When I feel a particularly strong emotion you will be affected by it, until I break the mind-meld."
"Will you?"
"Not yet. I will wait until you have sufficient knowledge and training before doing so. The mind-meld also allows me to know when you feel strong emotions and allow me to recognise them."
"That makes sense." She blew on a spoonful of soup to cool it down.
"I trust the food is to your standards," he said politely.
"It is," she replied, taking pains to eat neatly. They didn't speak as they ate the rest of their soup. Now that Spock had explained it, Zia was aware of the peaceful feeling filling her. When she finished, Spock whisked her bowl away and went to the kitchen to clean.
When he finished, he came into his living area and put two cushions on the floor. "Take a seat." They both sat cross-legged on one each and he indicated for her to close her eyes. "The first step is meditation. We must clear your mind of everything, leaving nothing but clarity. You must concentrate and empty your mind, so you can loosen your emotions and embrace logic."
She took a deep breath and focused on emptying her mind, but thoughts kept on swirling inside it. Irritation seeped in and Spock projected calm, quelling it instantly. He didn't even speak. Pondering for a second, Zia decided to focus on breathing. In… out… in… out… in… out…
In… out… in… out… in… out…
In… out… in… out… in… out…
In… out… in… out… in… out…
And nothing.
o.O.o
Spock sensed when she achieved clarity. He floated in bliss, tuned into her emotions, and sensed the turmoil and confusion. Then they slowly siphoned away, and her thoughts sounded in his head, clear as anything.
In… out… in… out… in… out…
In… out… in… out… in… out…
In… out… in… out… in… out…
Then she reached clarity. She felt nothing, except complete understanding. There was no anger, no pain… just total lucidity. Her breathe slowed and her heartbeat reduced to a few beats per minute. Her body slowed in response to her relaxed state. His mind, filled with blackness, suddenly burst with light.
He saw a Starship bridge, pure white with consoles everywhere, and filled with people. Most of them were faceless but he saw the faces of her two cadet friends, her parents, and him. Smiles lit up every face, and he understood.
He was seeing her deepest desire – to escape the trappings of a planet life and celebrate her freedom with her friends. A wave of weakness hit him as he was overwhelmed by emotion. What was he thinking by teaching her? Being subjected to her vulnerability would undoubtedly lead him to face his own emotions. He had put off that battle since he was eleven years old, but now it loomed frighteningly close.
Soon he would be faced with his own weakness.
o.O.o
The bliss ended slowly, like waking from a deep sleep. First, she became aware of her body. Second, her mind woke. Third, she opened her eyes.
For a second, she was drowsy. After blinking a few times, her head cleared, and she saw Spock sitting at his computer doing professor stuff. He swivelled his head and met her eyes. Something fluttered in her stomach, the same thing as yesterday, and she pushed it down.
"You did very well for your first attempt." He stood. "For the next twenty-four hours you will feel peaceful and calm, but you need more meditation to make it last. For now, you must do it in my presence, so I can project calming thoughts to aid you. You are not ready to try on your own."
"Okay," she groaned, standing up. "What's the time?"
"It is almost midnight."
"How long was I meditating?" That was slightly alarming.
"Almost five hours. I was about to rouse you."
She jumped up and down to force blood circulation. "I should get back to my room. I didn't expect for it to take so long."
"Of course," he nodded. "Sleep well, Miss Abbott."
Smiling, she left his room and walked wearily to her dorm. She felt ready to sleep, and when she arrived back in her room she collapsed into her bed, shoes and all.