The Moron that is Me

by A writer has no name

"Sasuke Uchiha is the world's biggest prick" according to seventeen year old Naruto Uzumaki. But after a party where some things go down, Naruto finds himself constantly thinking about him. But Naruto knows Sasuke uses people and throws them away without a care. He's not like those moronic girls fawning all over that teme. Definetly not! Not a chance...right?

11. Chapter 10

Trinity: Oh my gosh! How could I mess that up?!

Naruto: What? What happened?

Sasuke: You seriously didn't notice? It was pretty obvious. I think everyone noticed.

Trinity: Ah, I know!

Naruto: What? Tell me!

Sasuke: In the last chapter she put shirts instead of skins in Gai's question. It was a pretty big error considering it played a large part in the scene.

Trinity: *hits head against wall repeatedly and reprimands self* Baka, baka, baka!

Naruto: Oh it's okay! Don't worry it's not that big of a deal. It happens to everyone.

Sasuke: Che. Not really. She's just a moron.

Naruto: Sasuke!

Sasuke: Hn. It's true.

Trinity: *Shots Sasuke a glare but says nothing*

Naruto: You're such a cold bastard. Now shut up.

Sasuke: Make me~ *Leers at Naruto*

Trinity: Okay, okay. Enough. Thanks Naruto for the comfort. And Sasuke, thanks for nothing. To all readers, I apologize for that error in the last chapter. Now some responses to your reviews (thanks so much everyone that reviewed!) Oka-

Sasuke: Like anyone wants to hear from you.

Trinity: Naruto keep your boyfriend in line!

Naruto: What?! He's not-wait-no!

Trinity: And Sasuke if you keep it up I'll cut that scene out of the next chapter

Sasuke: Whatever…wait! Not that scene!

Trinity: *smirks evilly* yes that scene.

Sasuke: Hn. Fine. I'll be quiet.

Naruto: What scene?! What are you talking about?!

Trinity: Oh, nothing~

Naruto: Huh? Tell me dammit!

Trinity: Anyway on to the responses and then the story!

Thanks for the reviews! They made me so happy:

SexyBVirgo-Sasuke is a super possessive person! I love super possessive semes so you'll be seeing a lot of it!

Theia Pallas-What does gambere mean? I tried searching it on google but I couldn't find it/ ^_^' / Thanks for the review!

Tall Chai Latte: Your reviews always make me smile. Haha, I like how you review while you're reading and comment on the stuff you like. And I looked up NavyBlueWings, I will have to start reading some of her stuff because she has so many sasunaru stories (such a great couple!).

Peace-Love-Yaoi: Ah thank you so much for your review! I smiled so much while reading it my cheeks hurt! I put a tiny bit of Sasuke-Gaara tension in here because of your review

DrWatson636: Yay dramatics! And there will be no lemons yet-sadly-but fear not there will be some action in this chapter and there will of course be a lemon later in the story because let's be honest here-I'm a huge perv ^o^

HorsesRain: Thank you so much for the review! While I love that I have regular reviewers, it is always nice to hear from new people!

CrazyReader004: You will most definitely find out what happens at those tutoring sessions! Though Naruto may have some objections about what happens at this first session becoming a pattern-eek, I'm saying too much. Shutting up now.

ToXicStArCaNdy: I'm glad you found my story and you like it. Naruto will never just succumb to anyone, even Sasuke-but he is slowly falling for him ;D

Envyyyy: Ahaha! All your suggestions were funny. Of course I have seen Deathnote and MelloxMatt happens to be one of my fav pairings! Your one-shot will be up in the next week!

SASUNARU4ever: You have reviewed a lot which I appreciate so much! I can definitely write a oneshot for you. It might be a bit before I publish it though since I have a lot on my plate right now. But what pairing would you like?

KoiinuNe: Thanks for pointing that out. Gomen about the error, and here I thought I had actually done pretty well proofreading wise this time…Thank you though for the review and letting me know I had made a mistake!

Chapter 10: Tutors

(Earlier Today-sometime before Kiba picked me up)

How would I describe Sasuke? That's hard. A plethora of words, mostly ones Iruka would slap me for, pop into mind, but also some redeeming ones (I blame hormones for those though). Hmm, maybe going through the alphabet would help me:

A-asshole

B-Bastard (duh!)

C-Carnivore

D-Dreamy

E-egotistical

F-fathered by Satan (because it really would explain a lot)

G-great wooer (and yes that includes kissing and touching-what can I say he has the ability to turn people into putty in his hands, except for me of course)

H-Whore…oh oops my bad whore starts with a 'w', okay then Horny

I-Intelligent

J-just begging to be punched in that perfect face

K-….well I'm at a total loss on this one. The only K word that comes to mind is kind and hell will freeze over before I describe the teme as that

L-lecherous (he may be a stone cold bastard to most people but there have been one too many cases when he has been a bit too touchy feely with me)

M-mysterious

Well this is getting me absolutely nowhere. And I kind of need to respond to Iruka sometime this century. His soft brown eyes are now narrowed in suspicion as the seconds tick by and I don't answer his question. About a minute ago he asked me what Sasuke was like after I informed him I would be going to Sasuke's house after school today for English tutoring, and I had no idea how to respond to his question. About a week ago I would have gladly thrown Sasuke under the bus, telling Iruka what a man-whore, coldhearted bastard he was but now I couldn't bring myself to tell Iruka that Sasuke was a bad guy. For some reason I didn't want Iruka to think badly of him, and a small voice in my head was telling me that Sasuke wasn't even a bad guy. Stupid voice…it's probably the same one that makes me get sappy tendencies every now and then when I see Sasuke.

"Uh….he has black hair…" I almost face palmed when those words tumbled out of my mouth. Iruka gave me a skeptical and concerned look. "I mean, he…has nice eyes…oh and he is smart, and his hair is soft…" My mouth just sort of ran off in its own little direction, god I'm such a loser. I looked up at Iruka to see him looking really lost and unsure of how to respond. Shit. That's it I'm shutting up now. Maybe from now on I'll switch to the teme technique and revert to caveman times, replacing normal speech with 'hn's.

"…Okay. Um, are you friends?"

"Hell no!" I answered immediately. Iruka's concerned expression quickly had me amending my statement. "Hehe, I meant…we just haven't talked much." Well that wasn't a lie. We hadn't really had many conversations, though we had kind of gotten pretty 'well-acquainted' at the rave but Iruka did not need to know that.

"Oh okay then. Well, have good day at school. If you need anything while you're at that boy's house just call me okay?" I couldn't help but smile at Iruka's parental-ness. "You got it mom!" I replied, grabbing my bag and walking outside to wait for Kiba.

Truthfully, I'm extraordinarily nervous about going over to Sasuke's house, with Sasuke…what if we are alone? Oh boy…I hope one of his parents is home. I wonder what his parents are like? A really strange picture of a mustached older Sasuke with speckled hair popped into my head. Eh, that is disturbing.

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(Earlier Today-History Class)

Is it me or is Sakura totally glaring at me like some kind of murderous harpy? I know looks can't physically hurt me but it's freaking me the hell out. I looked around my History classroom, but no one seemed to notice my plight, instead paying attention to Mr. Mark. I glanced uneasily at Sakura again to see her still glaring at me. Pretty sure we are bordering on like ten minutes now. You think Mr. Mark would notice the back of a bright pink head of hair! I bet he probably knew, but because he hated me he wasn't saying anything. I looked to Temari, who was grinning at me, clearly having noticed the psycho stabbing me with her eyes. Her green eyes stayed glued on me practically the entire period so I couldn't glance at Sasuke, that would be basically be like yelling I love Sasuke in Sakura's eyes and then I may as well just sign a one way to ticket to the Psycho Bitch's slaughterhouse.

Needless to say when gym class rolled around I was just a little (A LITTLE!) excited to spend some time with Sasuke. I walked to gym class, discretely checking my surroundings for a raven-haired individual who tended to lurk in the hallways I walked through and invade my personal space like the creepy perv he is. Kiba showed up, basically jumping up and down in excitement over making eye-contact with Hinata today, but no Sasuke. Psh, not like I cared. Not really.

I didn't even see Sasuke until half way through gym class, which meant he was definitely avoiding me since, first of all we are in the same fricken gym class, and, secondly, there are like 30 something guys in my class, not exactly a huge crowd that makes locating someone difficult. We did a drill where we had to get into groups of three. Kiba and I got into a group with Rock Lee, basically a miniaturized version of Gai. Kiba can't stand him, but I like him. He's really nice and I find him refreshing. Kiba groaned when I called to Lee to be in our group.

Five minutes later, Lee and I were racing around the gym like madmen. Kiba was in the middle, hollering at me to get my ass in gear, not because of the desire to cheer me on and encourage stemming from our deep friendship but because he had placed a bet with a group of guys that I would beat Lee. Lee had challenged me to a race since I am so youthful. Hell yeah I'm youthful! Kiba had rolled his eyes when Lee asked me but his eyes nearly popped out of his skull when I enthusiastically accepted.

Lee and I were neck and neck, sprinting around the perimeter of the gym. Some of the other groups watched us, taking a break from their push-ups and sit-ups. The circular gathering of guys was the kids who had placed bets.

"Wow…Naruto…you…are so…youthful!" Lee cried in between huffs. The huge grin plastered across my face grew wider. "Hell yeah…I am…Bushy Brow!" I hollered in response. With the finish line in view I kicked it into over drive, and with a burst of speed I beat Lee. It didn't bother me that Sasuke was not talking to me after that because I honestly forgot all about him. Kiba tackled me with a bear hug, shoving his earning in my face with a gleeful smile. Swatting away the money from my face, I pushed him. Hey, I'm totally for hugs, but not by sweaty, post-gym people. Of course I bet Sasuke looks pretty good when he's all sweaty, in fact I know he looks great because of the soccer game yesterday. Yeah, I don't think I'd mind a hug from a sweaty teme…his body would be all slick and some dark bangs would stick to his face…shit! Naruto, get your head out of the fricken gutter! No, I bet Sasuke would be all gross and sweaty and repulsive. Yes, downright gross. And if he tried to hug me, I'd push him away because I have stellar willpower. And if he kept bugging me I'd punch his face in. This thought brought a wide grin to my face.

A few hours later, as I walked out of English class, I ran to the door, beating everyone and being the first one out. Gaara was waiting for me like always, but Kiba wasn't there. Before I could even ask, Gaara informed me that dog-boy was at the dentist office. Oh that's rough. Give me a shot any day over the dentist. Some weird guy who puts his hands in people's mouths for a living and sticks metal tools in your mouth that make your mouth taste funny, no way.

"Come over to my house for a sleepover tonight." Gaara asked, well more like commanded but it was really the same thing in Gaara-speak.

"Yeah, for sure!" I agreed, nodding my head vigorously. "Oh wait, I'll be over kind of late because I have tutoring." I sighed, hanging my head dejectedly. "Really?" Gaara asked curiously, though sounding slightly reprimanding. "Yeah and it's with the Teme." I spat, glaring over at said person who was leaning all attractively against a locker outside the English room talking to Neiji.

"What?" Gaara growled. I looked back, nervously, at Gaara, realizing that probably wasn't the best thing to say. Oh shit, me and my big mouth.

"Ah, Gaara it's okay, hey-wait a second…Gaara!" Gaara began stalking over to Sasuke. Oh not good, not good. Gaara had officially entered overprotective older brother Gaara state. I hurried to catch up, with him, and reached him just as he stopped in front of Sasuke. Dark eyes slid over Gaara's figure emotionlessly, before locking eyes with sea green ones. The crackling tension was nearly visible. They stared at each other, neither one backing down. Does anyone else feel like we should be in front of a saloon at midday with tumble weeds blowing around us, all ready for a gun fight? Because that is totally the vibe that I'm getting. I shook my head, focusing on what was actually happening, and not the Hollywoodized version in my head.

"Uh guys…stop it….Gaara come on lets go." I chuckled nervously. Two intense pairs of eyes looked toward me. I reached for Gaara's arm and pulled him away from Sasuke, who was glaring at where my hand was clutching Gaara's sleeve.

"Hurt Naruto and I'll fucking break your neck." Gaara growled. "Gaara!" I screeched, whipping my head to glare at the redhead. Mortified, I couldn't bring myself to look at Sasuke. "I'm serious." Gaara said to me. Although I was really glad for Gaara's desire to protect me, he was totally embarrassing me. "I can handle him myself. If he hurts me I'll punch his lights out!" I snapped confidently. Gaara smiled at me and shook his head, causing me to crack a grin. I actually forgot Sasuke was right there until a chest bumped into by back.

"Give it your best shot." The raven sneered from behind me. I glanced back at Sasuke's smug expression then to Gaara, whose expression darkened once more. Of course, Sasuke had to be all bastardy and make things worse right when I had calmed the redhead down. Somehow both Gaara and I knew that Sasuke wasn't referring to my threat to punch him but Gaara's to break his neck. Gaara moved toward Sasuke which was actually closer toward me since I was sandwiched between the two.

"I will Uchiha." He threatened darkly. I looked over at Suigetsu, hoping he would aid me in breaking the fight up, but he was still leaning against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, a smirk on his lips, and excitement dancing in his eyes. What a jerk. Wasn't he concerned about Sasuke at all? I mean he was Sasuke's best friend and all, and everyone knew Gaara's amazing fighting ability. Oh jeez, what if Sasuke's like some black belt or something (knowing him he probably is)?

I gave Gaara a hard look. "Stop. I don't want you getting in a fight over me." At my words he halted, but the dark look on his face remained. I turned toward Sasuke and glared at him. "I know it's hard, but quit being a bastard for a second, okay?" I growled. He looked at me intensely, my glare not affecting him in the least. A hand abruptly gripped my waist and pulled me against Sasuke's chest. "Hn. Dobe, I don't like you talking to me like that." His voice was low, and his warm breath fanned my ear. A low growl came from Gaara, whose entire body was stiff. "Too bad. Now let go, teme," I retorted, shoving my elbow into his stomach to accentuate my point. A low grunt sounded. Sasuke's grip slackened and I slipped over to Gaara, putting a hand on his arm to calm him down. "Please." I said softly. I didn't want Gaara to get in trouble and even though I wouldn't mind if Sasuke got into trouble, I really didn't want either to get hurt. Gaara huffed and turned around, stomping down the hallway. I looked back at Sasuke, who was glaring at the wall, his head turned away from me. Is he pouting…? It looks more like brooding, but maybe it's teme pouting.

"Don't provoke Gaara. And stop manhandling me you bipolar bastard." I reprimanded him before turning and catching up with Gaara. I heard Suigetsu laugh before being snapped at to shut up.

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(Present Moment)

I glanced at Sasuke's profile. He's kind of peerrrtttyyy. But that doesn't negate the fact that he is a bastard through and through. My eyes travel back to my lap where my hands lay folded. The silence in Sasuke's car is downright suffering. When I walked out of school after detention, Sasuke was sitting in his car waiting for me. I had hopped in and he didn't so much as greet me. Now I was mad about the little stunt he pulled with Gaara, but I sucked it up and, deciding to be the better person, I thanked him for picking me up and tutoring me. I wanted to start off on the right foot even though this whole setup was just asking for trouble and would most likely not end well. At that moment I had turned to Sasuke with a friendly smile. And you know what the bastard did? He looked at me out of the corner of his eye, not even bothering to fully turn his head to me, and he said "hn" before driving off. So here we both are, me feeling pissed off and awkward and Sasuke…well I can't tell what he's feeling…but that is not important.

I sigh and look a Sasuke again. One hand starts thumping against my jeans anxiously and my eyes drift from Sasuke to the window to my lap and then back to Sasuke.

"I swear to God you have the attention span of a fucking five year old." Sasuke gritted out, breaking the silence and startling me. I was so shocked that he spoke that his insult didn't even register until a few seconds passed.

"Tch, I do not. You're just being all anti-social so I'm bored." I said defensively. Sasuke remained silent before speaking again. "You can turn on the radio and listen to it if you want." I grinned at Sasuke words and immediately reached for the radio. I went through random channels not really knowing what stations were what since I didn't listen to the radio often (Kiba's radio is broke in his truck and whenever I ride in Temari's car she says I'm not allowed to touch anything other than my seat). As I switched through channels my eyes slid over to Sasuke judging his reaction. When I turned the knob more a high operetta voice gurgled from the speakers. Sasuke visibly cringed at the music. Ah, yes I do believe this song will work. I cranked up the volume and then leaned back in my seat, turning my body toward Sasuke so I could watch him (squirm that is). He frowned at looked at me for a moment before returning his eyes to the road.

"Why are we listening to this?" Asked Sasuke sounding slightly peeved.

"Because you don't like it." I replied happily. Sasuke looked dumbfounded for a moment before his jaw clenched and his mouth pulled into a tight line. He reached forward and turned off the music, not that I minded much.

"So what does your house look like?" I asked casually, not wanting to descend into awkward silence again. Plus I was really curious about Sasuke's house.

"You'll see soon enough," He said amusedly.

"I've never been in this part of town before…" I mumbled, looking out the window at the wide open land with large estates appearing every now and then.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow and looked at me, causing me to smile sheepishly back at him.

"Hn" He said with a smirk on his face. My brows furrowed. Then Sasuke pointed his finger toward the windshield and I followed it. My eyes bugged out of my skull. We were drawing closer and closer to a huge, classic style brick mansion, and when I say mansion I mean a freaking mansion. When the car came to a stop, I grabbed my bag and jumped out of the car. After shutting the door, I merely stood still looking at the magnificent house. I'd never seen such a big or expensive looking house! Are they like rolling in cash or something?

"Dobe, you're drooling." A teasing voice said from right behind me.

"Shh! I'm admiring your house!" I snapped, my eyes not moving from the mansion. Suddenly my view was cut off by none other than the teme's face, right in front of my own.

"Ah, what are you doing? I don't want to look at you!" I exclaimed in frustration. A genuine smile, not a smirk but a small smile, spread on Sasuke's face striking me completely dumbfounded, the sight making my stomach feel fluttery and my mind to be wiped empty. Then he leaned in and before I knew it he was a foot away from me again, the only indication he came closer was the tingling feeling on the tip of my nose where he kissed me.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" I shouted, jumping away from him like a cat that got its tail stepped on. Oh my god! What if someone saw! …Wait since when am I more concerned about people seeing him kiss me than him actually kissing me. My hands flew to cover my nose and blood rushed to my face in embarrassment.

"Kissing you." He said nonchalantly with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Wha?" How could he say that so casually!

"Do I really need to repeat myself again? Maybe your issue in English isn't the fact that you're stupid but that you don't listen." He mused with a mocking smile. I was struck dumb by his insult, my embarrassment from the kiss and my anger from the insult making it impossible for me to form any coherent words. With a sigh he grabbed my hand and began pulling me toward the front door. "Come on dobe."

Once I regained my senses I yanked my hand from his, totally ignoring the fact that his hand was really warm and soft and how nicely it fit with mine. I trudged behind him grumbling incoherent insults and obscenities.

When I walked through the front door, a few steps behind Sasuke, I could only gape at the inside.

"Come on, dobe. My room's upstairs, unless you want to stand in the middle of the entryway like an idiot all day." I whipped my head toward Sasuke's smirking face. I walked toward the stairs where he was waiting.

"Wait, are we studying in your room?" I asked nervously, hoping I had heard him wrong. "Yes," was the curt answer I received. Okay, then. That's totally fine with me. It's not like I'd get uncomfortable being in his bedroom. His room is probably really cool, though. It probably will look like it came straight from a magazine. He probably has it decorated in navy blue since he seems to really like that color…not that I notice how he wears navy blue more than any other color…that would be creepy and stalkerish and I am so not stalking the teme. If anything he is stalking me.

I swear we walked past about a dozen rooms before reaching Sasuke's. He reached out and opened the door, stepping through it. I followed, albeit a bit more hesitantly. I promptly looked around the room to see if it looked anything like the one I had imagined. It was so much cooler. A massive bed with a modern black headboard and navy blue, silk sheets was against one wall in between two matching, expensive looking end tables with various items strewn across their wooden surfaces. There was a door directly across from the bed on the opposite wall and next to the door was a dresser and on the other side a shorter, wider one with a mirror on top. And since the room so fricken massive another side of the room has a desk and a laptop (ooo is that the newest Mac?!) and an ipad and an original ipod and an itouch…for the love of all ramen why they all does he need all of those! On the other side of the room was an expanse of shelving units mostly filled with books (and not the thin, flimsy kind that didn't exceed one hundred pages, we are talking the big, hulking monstrosities that give me a headache and make me sick with boredom from just looking at them) but with some other trinkets occasionally breaking up the books.

I glanced back to where Sasuke was a moment ago to find he isn't there. Looking around I see he is sitting in the chair in front of his desk looking at me with a bored expression. He has an amazing room, not that I'd ever tell him that.

"Okay, let's get this over with. I want to get out of here as soon as possible." I grumbled as I made my way towards him. A smug smirk stretched across his face. My mind briefly wandered to the night at the rave. Images of Sasuke's lust-filled eyes looking down at me, of him passionately kissing me, running his hands down my sides-Holy fucktards! What in the goddamn hell! Stop it, stop it right now. These thoughts are so not okay. Not good. Bad Naruto. That stupid prick. He did this to me.

I eyed him suspiciously as I sat down a few feet away from him on the edge of his bed. His smile only grew. I wonder, for emergency purposes only (such as needing to quickly run away from temes), how long the drop is from that large window next to the desk.

"I didn't know you were so eager to be on my bed, Naruto." Sasuke purred, his eyes glinting with predator-like qualities.

"EH!" I jumped up from the bed as if burned and took a few steps away from it for extra measure, even if those steps did bring me closer to the teme. My cheeks flared red at his words even though they weren't true. I glared at him, his own eyes roaming over my body making me wish I would have worn a full body cloak to school. Damn that's right I don't own one. I'll have to get one. In orange.

"Pervert! T-That's not the case at all!" I shouted, not quite sure why I was shouting in the first place. Sasuke gracefully stood up and closed the distance between us. I could only stare into his eyes, completely lost in them for a moment. Hands gripping my hips made me jump and I was about to yell at the bastard when I found myself falling back and landing on a very soft bed. Sasuke leaned over me, placing his hands on either side of my head. His entire lower half was pressed against my own, making it impossible for me to stand up.

"I like you on my bed." His husky voice sent shivers coursing through me. As he leaned in, internal panic erupted in my mind, all of which completely shut off when his lips pressed against mine. His lips were soft, slowing coaxing mine into moving against his own. The kiss was slow and sensual and nothing like any other kiss I'd ever had. Or maybe it was just that I couldn't remember any such instance at the moment, hell I'm not sure I could even spell my name right now.

I felt the bed shift under me and then Sasuke was closer than before, his chest pressed against my own. Sasuke pulled back, breathing more rapidly than normally. He stared down at me through half-lidded eyes. Then he was kissing me again, more fervently and impatient. Feeling a swipe along my lips, I willing parted them, not thinking but just going along with it, too wrapped up in my own feelings and emotions. My body felt like it was on fire, a feeling I never felt with anyone but Sasuke, a feeling I had sort of been yearning for since the rave. As his tongue ravished my mouth, small moans escaped me. After clenching and unclenching my hands at my sides, I gave in and just wrapped them around Sasuke's neck, pulling him closer to me. He grunted when my hands curled in his hair. It is so soft and silky. I love touching it. The kiss was intense and causing me to feel way too overheated.

"Sasuke," I breathed once our mouths were finally separated. His eyes grew darker at my words. He leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to my pulse point. "Sensei works too," came a sensual purr against my neck, followed by a lick along my entire neck. The tone almost, almost made me melt until I registered, through my hazy mind, what he actually said.

"F-fuck teme get off!" I huffed, unwrapping my arms from his neck and pushing against his chest. Sasuke hissed in annoyance but slowly got off me nonetheless. I quickly jumped off the bed, glaring at him. In return he merely stared back, his face twisted with annoyance and anger. Uncomfortable silence built between us as we stared each other down. Sasuke for his part didn't waver a bit while I felt my own glare weakening.

"Hn." Sasuke broke off eye contact and walked to the desk. I watched him as he rifled through various sheets before pulling a few out. "Get your English work out," he ordered icily. I mentally groaned. All of this is just too much, his mood swings, my stupid attraction for him that just keeps growing no matter how much I try and suffocate it, my epically awful school life, and just everything involving Sasuke in general.

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"Ah! I just don't get it!" I cried in frustration, slamming my fist against the paper.

"What the fuck don't you get? We've been going over these terms for a goddamned hour!" Sasuke snapped, his voice bordering a yell. He was about ready to rip my head, and honestly if I have to hear him ask me about a caesura or explain to me what an asyndeton (or was it syndeton? I don't fucking know) is one more fucking time I'll just save him the trouble and do it myself.

"We can't all be geniuses like you!" I spat.

"Obviously." He sneered, looking pointedly at me.

"God your voice is so annoying. All those fangirls must be deaf. I want to bash my head against a wall every time you talk." I said angrily. Sasuke's eyes narrowed into slits.

"No, it's your stupidity that makes me want to bash my head against a wall." He growled, crunching the paper in his hands into a ball.

"Ha! You're so smart, figure out a better way to teach me. Or are you just a sucky tutor, sensei?" I retorted mockingly. He glared at me, not the murderous one that makes me want to cower, just the one that says he really wants to punch my lights out. He has many glares, a wide variety really. He stood up quickly from his chair directly across from me. "I'll be right back. Don't touch anything." And with that he swept out of the room.

I got out of my seat, stretching out the kinks that had formed after sitting so long. I walked over to the door that had been bugging me for so long. Due to my pride I had been unable to ask Sasuke what was behind the door, because then he might realize how amazing I thought his room was and then his ego would inflate even more and then he may realize that I actually really, really like him and that would be awful and his ego would get even larger and then he'd think of me as a fangirl and he would use me (not that I'd ever just let him use me!) and dump me aside and that would not be good, not at all.

I opened the door, poking my head in curiously. It is a closet. A closet that could house a fucking elephant! And it was filled with clothes, mostly all navy blue, black and a little red and white, and some shoes. Wait what the fuck is in his dressers then?! I ran out of the closet, yanking the drawers open to the tall dresser. Clothes. I ran to the second dresser. More clothes. How many clothes does one person need? There's no way he can wear all this. I haven't owned this many clothes ever even accumulating every article I've ever had. I shoved the drawers back into place, feeling extremely annoyed. Walking back over to the desk I sat down in the fold up chair Sasuke had brought up for me to sit on. He totally saved the cushy swivel chair for himself. The bastard. I contemplated stealing his chair but he'd probably make a perverted comment about it so I decided not to.

I looked over the desk, grabbing his Ipad, but shoving it back on the desk when I tried to use it and it asked for a password. I tried the Itouch as well but it also required a password. Honestly why did he need a password! It was just irritating. Here I am trying to entertain myself and defy Sasuke by playing on his electronics and he's ruining it because he put passwords on everything. I grabbed the Ipad again and glared at it. Tch. I could probably try and figure out the password for hours and not get it. I set it down again, then my eyes focused on his phone that was conveniently sticking out of his backpack, basically begging to be taken. So I snatched it up and held it to my chest, glancing at the door to make sure Sasuke wasn't back yet. Turning my attention back to his phone, I pressed the button and slid the arrow.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" I hissed as the screen popped up to input a password. Then I remembered what Kiba had done to Gaara's phone last month, earning him a huge bruise on his arm that had lasted for three weeks. I then began to randomly push every number on the pad. It kept flashing red, alerting me that none of these were the right passwords but I couldn't care less since I was going to lock the fucker's phone for hours!

After several minutes, an evil chuckle slipped through my lips as his phone was effectively locked for five hours.

"What are you doing?"

"AH!" I jumped up nearly a foot in the air in surprise. I turned around to see Sasuke looking very…peeved. He looks like that a lot when he's with me. I blinked, looking at him with as much innocence as I could muster while simultaneously feeling like the fucking awesomest person in the world for locking his phone.

"For you," I said with an innocent smile as I held my hands out, cupped around his phone. His eyes narrowed when he saw his phone and he promptly yanked it form my hands. Then I noticed what he had in his other hand. My eyes widened and I licked my lips, inhaling deeply. The best smell in the world filled my nostrils. My eyes zeroed in on the steaming bowl in Sasuke's other hand.

"Five fucking hours! Dobe y-"

"RAMEN!" I l dove toward the bowl, ready to snatch it away from Sasuke when a hand pressed into my face and shoved me away. "Sasuke teme!" I hissed as I composed myself and slunk back to my chair, plopping into it and crossing my arms in pouting manner. He was pinching the bridge of his nose, gripping his phone tightly.

"I thought I told you not to touch anything." He said in a strained voice.

"This wouldn't have happened if you wouldn't lock all your stuff." I huffed, looking toward the ground. I felt slightly guilty, especially since he brought me ramen, but I liked to bother him for some reason.

"Let's just get back to work. We have a little less than an hour left and I'll drive you home." He sat back down, slipping his phone in his pocket. My eyes stayed glued on the bowl of ramen.

"Oh do you want this?" Sasuke asked in a silky voice. I glared but nodded my head.

"How do you know I love ramen?" I asked. Sasuke cocked his head, looking thoughtful and totally cute and amazing.

"You always eat it at lunch." He stated. Eh! What? A huge blush broke out across my face and I could only stare at Sasuke. Was he watching me at lunch? That makes me feel so amazing. God that's so embarrassing! My face was literally burning off and my stomach was doing somersaults. Sasuke just smirked, tilting his head back upright. Sasuke actually made me feel great by saying something nice. He wasn't a total bastard.

"Oh this isn't for you." Sasuke said as his smirk grew, becoming more malicious.

"What?!" Sasuke is a total and complete bastard.

"You may have some," He stated, "once you memorize the terms. One term, one bite." He is…using ramen as…incentive?

"Deal." I said seriously. I will get that ramen, dammit. Sasuke merely smirked in response.

"Okay then…hyperbole." Ah, shit.

"Uh….um…I don't know." I said timidly. I can't remember that one, damn! I looked longingly at the ramen then back at Sasuke.

"That's too bad." Sasuke replied, not sounding like he cared in the least.

"Alliteration." I glared at the smug bastard. I know he likes my discomfort. Wait I think I know this one. Come on. For the ramen….alliteration…ahah!

"The repetition of sounds!" I exclaimed. I smiled brightly at Sasuke, overflowing with happiness.

"What kind of sounds?" And then he crushed my happiness.

"Umm…" I know there are two options, I just can't remember what they are and which one of them is right. I looked helplessly at Sasuke.

"It starts with a C." He prompted. He just helped me. That was unexpected and nice…then again he was tutoring me so he was supposed to be helping me

"Consonant!" Sasuke smirked at me before turning to the ramen and twirling the fork in the noodles. He lifted it out of the bowl.

"Say ah."

"What? Hell no!" I said, panicking as the fork neared my mouth. I did not need Sasuke to feed me!

Sasuke said nothing but merely looked at me. I slowly parted my lips, a blush forming on my cheeks, and the fork slid into my mouth. Sasuke was looking intensely into my eyes and I just couldn't look away. When the fork slid back out I began to chew, looking at the ground.

Several minutes later after the sixth bite, I looked suspiciously at Sasuke. "Wait, aren't you going to have any?" Sasuke made a disgusted face. "I would never eat that shit." He sneered arrogantly.

"What? You are kidding right! Ramen is the best food ever!" I exclaimed incredulously. Was he batty?

Sasuke's lip curled in disgust. "No it's cheap and bad for you and doesn't even taste good."

"Not true. It's the best!" Sasuke just sighed at my heated defense.

"I think it tastes like shit." He said with finality. Iruka always says people are entitled to their own opinions and he's right. Well except for Sasuke because all his thoughts are twisted and wrong.

Sasuke's eyes suddenly took on a mischievous glint which was as attractive as it was concerning.

"Next one, metonymy."

"Uh like an arm representing a body or something like that." I can't remember the actually definition.

"Good enough." My eyes widened at this. Sasuke had been so strict with the other answers why was he going easy now?

He pulled out a fork full of noodles and brought it to my lips. I opened them and took the fork into my mouth, sucking off the noodles before it was removed. I eyed Sasuke the entire time. I trust him about as far as I can throw him. I chewed the noodles slowly, my wary eyes on Sasuke.

"You know, I haven't had ramen in a while. Maybe I should give it a chance and try it again." Sasuke's voice smooth and velvety and put my bastard alert on high alert. Nothing good happens when he uses that voice on me.

Sasuke leaned forward, his lips hovered over my own and a huge smirk was on his face. I stopped chewing. Then lips descended upon my own. Only moments after Sasuke began kissing me his tongue forced it's way into my mouth which wasn't hard because I wasn't resisting. In fact I wasn't really doing anything. I was just sitting there, immobile, because I wasn't sure if this was actually happening. Because who the fuck tongues someone who is eating?!

My mouth was feeling quite full between Sasuke's tongue and the noodles stuffed in it. His tongue swirled around my own, rubbing against various parts of mouth, before it began moving some of the noodles into his own. It all fell into place then. I realized what his words meant and I would have blanched if my mouth wasn't already occupied. What he was doing was just…just so…gross…and so unbelievably…hot. How the heck did he even think of doing this?

He began sucking on my tongue, making me whimper. It felt so good. Some more noodles left my mouth and went into his but I honestly didn't give a flying fuck about the noodles at this point. He parted from me and swallowed the noodles, his smirk returned. I couldn't help the small grin that formed on my own. Sasuke seemed to be caught off guard by it. His face momentarily looked shocked before his smirk returned, even bigger than before.

"Pervert," I gasped whilst catching my breathe, " I thought you didn't like the ramen."

"Maybe not, but I like the taste of you." My face burned bright red at this. I always knew Sasuke was sexy but I didn't know he was a cornball or maybe he just sucked at pickup lines. I looked into his dark eyes and my heart skipped a beat.

Oh shit.

It's official.

I like Sasuke Uchiha, the world's biggest prick, way, way too much.

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"So you have one parent and his name is Iruka?" Sasuke asked, summarizing the short synopsis on my home life I had just given him.

"Yeah and I was adopted. I don't remember my parents. They died when I was just a baby in a car crash. Iruka was a friend of my dad's and took me in."

"Oh." Sasuke said. I could tell he felt uncomfortable. He didn't really strike me as the emotional type so I wasn't surprised. I grinned at him.

"Sasuke. I have bad news. I think you were emotionally stunted as a child." I chuckled when Sasuke shot me a glare. His face softened after looking at me though and his smirk reappeared.

"So tell me about your family now." I had basically just told him everything about mine and I am more than slightly curious about his.

"I have two parents and a brother. There's not much more to tell." Sasuke said indifferently. Clearly there was more than that.

"What kind of answer was that? That sucked, teme. I want to talk about you now." I looked at Sasuke who was looking at the road. I would be very concerned if he wasn't, since he is currently driving me home.

"That's too bad because I still want to talk about you. Like your friends." Sasuke said. "More specifically that redhead," he voice darkened as he added the last part. I rolled my eyes and sighed.

"First of all his name is Gaara. He is my best friend so you better be nice to him or I'll knock your teeth out. Like today you totally provoked him. He just wants to protect me."

"Yeah, from me!" He spat.

"Well duh. Last time I checked you're not exactly perfect boyfriend material." I said sardonically.

"Tch. Of course I am. Everyone wants to be with me." Sasuke said snottily. I rolled me eyes again. Honestly arguing about his ego wouldn't make a difference, it's still going to be just as disturbingly large.

"Whatever you say. But I wouldn't want Gaara to date a playboy who has used nearly the entire female population like tissues and thrown them away." I stated.

"Are you jealous?" He asked playfully.

"There is no end to your ego is there?" I shook my head in mock exasperation (though I was a bit exasperated with him). I can't deny that I am greatly enjoying our casual banter.

"Wait a minute is Gaara gay?" Sasuke asked, his voice serious once more.

"He's bi. Why?" I asked. Oh that rhymed!

"I think he likes you." Sasuke muttered darkly. Oh dear god, I feel like we've been over this.

"We are just best friends. Hell he's like my fucking brother. We are no way romantically involved." I feel like I'm spelling something out for a two year old. A possessive, sexy, dangerous two year old…okay so maybe the two year old comparison kind of sucks balls.

"Sexually?" He growled. I resisted the urge to pinch the bridge of my nose in annoyance.

"No! We are not involved sexually either!" I exclaimed in frustration.

"Good. Because your mine." He said possessively.

"For the love ramen, I'm not fucking yours, teme!" God, I want to punch him so badly.

"Yes, you are." He stated icily.

"Am not!" He replied heatedly.

"Oh so you just go around kissing all the guys who you meet at raves or who tutor you?" He asked slyly.

"What!? Wait-shit! No! I don't! I'm not some slut!" I stuttered, trying to regain my stance after being knocked over by Sasuke's verbal blow.

"Oh? So there is only one person?" His smirk makes me want to punch it off his face.

"Of course!" I don't go around kissing multiple people!

"And that person is me?" He asked.

"YES!" I practically shouted in frustration. It was then that I noticed how smug he looked.

Well, shit.

But of course I blushed the color of a fucking tomato because I have a goddamned blushing problem.

"I'm not fucking yours…" I mumbled to myself dejectedly, crossing my arms over my chest in a pout.

A few minutes (silent minutes) later he pulled into my driveway. I opened the door, slinging my backpack over my shoulder once I climbed out.

"Thank you for the ride." I said stiffly.

"Of course," he replied silkily.

"Uh, cya tomorrow then." I said, feeling kind of awkward. I feel like I'm coming home from a date or something. Just the thought of being on a date with Sasuke resurrected the accursed blush. I looked away from him, fixing my eyes on my white garage door.

"Yes, good bye." He replied. I could just hear the smugness oozing out of his words. There isn't a doubt in my mind that his signature smirk is plastered on his face.

"Oh and dobe, you are very cute when you smile." WHAT?!

I looked at him with a cross between a glare and bewilderment. "I-er-what-you can't-uh-d-don't say stuff like that!" I spluttered before slamming his door shut and stalking off to my front door in a very hurried manner.

When I finally was inside my house, with the door firmly shut, I peeked out the window to see Sasuke driving away down my street. My eyes trailed after his sleek black car.

"Who are we spying on?" I jumped at the sound of another voice and snapped my head to the side to see Iruka mirroring my own position, holding back the curtain with one hand with his face an inch from the glass. He looked at me, seemingly like the picture of innocence, his big brown orbs staring at me.

"Iruka!" I squealed.

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Three years ago:

Why the hell are all of my friends in relationships?! Shikamaru is dating some blonde girl with large circular glasses whose name I can never remember. Temari is dating this guy named Peter who is actually kind of scary. He smokes all the time, and not cigarettes like Shika, but marijuana. What the fuck is a fourteen year old doing with a stash of marijuana? And then there's Kiba who is dating some girl named Stephanie. I don't even understand why he is going out with her since he likes Hinata Hyuga. I know it's to make her jealous, but I think it's stupid. I guess Gaara isn't in a relationship either, but at least he's kissed people before. I feel like such a loser.

Gosh everyone is in relationships or at least 'getting something' (coughGaaracough) except me. What is this? I'm sitting alone after school since everyone is too busy to hang out. I look out over the green park, admiring the scene. Not a lot of people come here. My eyes glaze over as looked out. So here I am on Friday. All my friends are off with their boyfriend or girlfriend and I'm sitting in the park like, "I like that tree. That's a nice tree…"

I jumped off the bench and began making my way past the pond. When I glanced out at it, I stopped noticing a dark haired boy. That's strange, I've never seen anyone my age around here before, at least not alone like me. I stared at him some more. I tend to stare at people a bit too long, and it creeps people out. Suddenly the dark haired boy turned toward me and my eyes widened. Unsure of what to do after being caught staring I smiled shyly at the boy. His eyes narrowed at me and then he sneered, promptly turning away. I was left flabbergasted, reeling. That was just so…rude. I scowled at stuck my tongue out at the boy even though he was no longer looking me. I briefly wondered who the dark haired boy was, but stopped since every time I thought of him I got pissed off. I walked away, eager to get back home. Iruka went to the store today which meant my ramen stocks would be refilled.

I shook my head as I made my way to Gaara's. Why the hell am I thinking about the first time I saw Sasuke?

I need a fucking CAT scan. Or some hard liquor. The latter is probably more likely.

Whilst writing this, I have found that Naruto makes sexy situations way less sexy, but it's just the way he thinks so… ^_^ My friend told me about the tree comment. I love it so much ohonhonhon!

Please review and let me know what you think

BTW Happy Holidays Everybody!