I can't handle that!

"I can't handle this!" I griped, teacup shaking in my lion paw. I poofed myself outside of Fluttershy's house the next morning, having sent Pinkie back home to sleep and make up with Incer that evening. The yellow mare had let me in, got me settled and brought me new cup every time I broke one. I was on cup number three.

"This is what you wanted, isn't it?" The mare eyed my cup with a certain sad resignation. I tried to ease my shaking, and it helped. Marginally.

"No, I mean, yes but..." I felt it odd that Fluttershy was so accepting of this new situation, but didn't press the issue. "I want to be with her, but I don't know what that entails, or how to get her to stay with me. She did only agree to date me, it's not as if she's contemplating foals."

Fluttershy nodded and blew on her tea before taking a sip.

"I think you're going to have to remember that everypony is different, and Pinkie is very special. As long as you give her your all, you will be fine."

"What if I give it my all, but she doesn't..." I felt my face crumple as I contemplated all the things that could go wrong. "What if we aren't even friends after..."

"You will cross that bridge when, and if, you get to it." The yellow mare said in a no-nonsense tone, "You should focus on what to do now. Think about what is important to Pinkie."

I thought about her words, and dismissed them. I would worry, but I'd play along. She seemed to know what she was doing.

"I know her friends are... that'll be a gong show. Not to offend, but you are the only one who wasn't faking at being pleasant. I could feel the anger emanating off of Twilight Sparkle." I felt myself growl at her name and shook my head. She would be most difficult. Not like I even wanted to be her friend, but it was for Pinkie Pie, so I'd do my best.

"Fun. Easy enough." I pondered a moment.

"Her personal freedom and..." I then remembered our little chat in the royal gardens, "Family."

"I'm sure that if you keep that in mind you will do fine. What were you thinking of for the first date?"

"That's my issue!" The ill fated cup shattered in my clutches, "I have no idea! Why can't we skip this and go right to just being together?!"

Fluttershy sighed, getting up to grab another cup, "If you think you can be with a mare without taking her out on dates, you have another thing coming. Dates help keep the romance. Which is something I'm sure you'll look forward to in the future."

I frowned inwardly, wondering how many of Fluttershy's little animal friends mated in her presence. The mare pondered a moment before reaching to the back of the cupboard and pulling out a wooden cider mug. It had a bright blue R on the side, and I reasoned it belonged to the rainbow hued pony. I felt bad for breaking her cups, but I would try my best to fix them before I left.

"You will have to take her out on dates even if you're hoof fasted." She poured some tea into the mug and trotted over, handing me the less breakable item, "It means you care enough to put her in your mind enough that you think of things for her. Do you want help deciding?"

I murmured a thanks and took a sip of tea, thinking. I really wanted our first date to be special, but it wouldn't hurt to hear a few of the things that established couples did. I finally nodded, asking what 'normal' was on a first date. They ranged from coffee to lunch, dinner to carnivals, taking in a play or going to a public art show. All dreadfully boring.

"And any of those will woo her?" I was pretty skeptical. "I need something special."

"Umm... well maybe a dinner and then something she wouldn't expect? Give her a surprise."

"That could be done." Though it still left something special for me to dream up, I had a sketch of a plan forming at least, "I halfway think her name should have been 'Surprise' to be honest."

Fluttershy nodded, swallowing another sip of tea, "So, you know what you're doing?"

I wrung my mismatched hands, wondering if I had done enough. It was a first date, no need to bring out all the stops, right? I wasn't sure. Why was this so hard? The sun shone brightly over Ponyville, and I felt bad for the Cakes. No one really seemed to want to skirt past me or bother asking me to move aside. But I didn't know when Pinkie would be home, she never gave a specific time. Which under normal circumstances would be fine becuse no one could say if somepony were late or not but... I didn't want to be late this time. Not for Pinkie Pie. I had to make the right impression.

The pink filly bounced into view, cotton candy shaped hair that really shouldn't have been gravititionally possible. My heart stopped when she looked up at me, her open blue eyes sparkling as she hopped into the sun.

"Gosh, you're here early Dizzy!" I grinned at her, ignoring the looks from other passersby.

"Am I?"

"I said noon, right?" Pinkie frowned, as if trying to recall specifics, "and it's 20 to."

"...Is noon always twelve?" I asked, my knowledge of time probably archaic in comparison.

"Yuppers!" She smiled, "Noon isn't always when the sun is highest in the sky anymore."

Go figure. 12 noon then. Not... high noon. I shrugged.

"The joys of being courted by a dinosaur are becoming apparent already."

"Yup! You're early, that's great!" She jumped over to my side, "Where to?"

I cleared my throat, leading her away from the throng vying to get into Sugarcube Corner. She trotted along, and I smiled before continuing.

"I thought we'd go for a walk first."

"Okie doki." Pinkamena agreed happily.

I led her along, taking the fastest route out of the village. We walked along at a decent pace, once we were off the cobblestones, always stopping to admire the scenery. Butterflies were flitting about on flowers of blue and violet, but I couldn't help but turn a few of the flowers scarlet. Pinkie smiled at that, and I wondered, briefly, if she would be my queen of chaos should I take over the world.

"Dizzy, that's awesome! Do you think the blue and red ones will crossbreed?"

No, she wouldn't. I was for the good now, Gaia help us all. It's Pinkie's fault anyway. I nodded my agreeance, and she proceeded to bolt toward a field of tall grass. I slithered after her, but soon lost her in the grass.

"Pinkie Pie?" I called, unsure of what was happening, "Where'd you go?"

"This way!" I followed her voice and the wind picked up, blowing the tips of the grass against my cheek.

"Where?" I called, feeling foolish. This was ridiculous, and not in a good way. I tried to listen for her, but the wind had gotten stronger, and the grass muffled all sounds as it hit my face, "This isn't-"

"GOTCHA!"

We collapsed on the ground as she tackled me from behind, effectively pinning me. Her giggles were immense.

"Youshouldhaveseenyourface!" the pink pony choked out, "So... Funny! Ahahaha! Where's Pinkie, where's Pinkie, BOOM! There I am!"

I growled and flipped her off me, so I was squishing her instead, "Not so funny now eh? You're lucky this isn't a dog pile!"

She squeaked in her laughter, "Dizzy... can't... breathe!"

I got up, shaking my head, and holding out a paw to help her up, "You are so random."

"You talk as though you don't like it." She grinned, having regained her breath.

"You mistake me, I am simply unaccustomed to it from ponies."

We got back on the compacted dirt path, grins hardly leaving our faces. She was such a playful pony. The sun beat down overhead, and I was glad when it circled around to the forest.

"I thought you might like a dip in the pond."

"Ooo that sounds super fun!"

I breathed a sigh of relief. She wasn't disappointed. Yet. When we arrived on the waterfront I summoned up my phenomenal cosmic power, and set out a small picnic blanket, basket, and parasol. The pond itself was graced with floating devices of all kinds, but not enough to make it hard to just swim normally. Pinkie giggled, and sprang for the water and I grinned, following. I felt like an eel underneath the water and it was glorious! I saw the little pink blob floating ahead of me and I swirled around her. She smiled, mouth still tightly shut, blue eyes squinting against the currents I created. I gave an all toothy grin before shooting out of the water, and up onto the surface. A floating lounge chair soon accommodated my length and I felt myself bake in the heat. Ahh.

Pinkie surfaced, and splashed me. I glared as she stuck her tongue out. Now... it is war! The sheer amount of splashing and whooping had me wondering why the neighbourhood hadn't come clamoring over the hill to see what the hay we were up to. Not that I would have given two snaps about that.

"Dizzy catch me!"

She was screaming as she fell off a large pirate ship I had made to combat the cargo ship she had requested. I moved beneath her, catching her and throwing her right back up into the air, where she stayed, hovering.

"Discord! What are you doing?" She giggled, walking on air, "No fair!"

"Maybe not, but I'm the Spirit of Chaos. I don't have to follow any 'rules'." I drawled, "Besides I heard your stomach growl."

"How the hay did you hear that?" She asked, after I floated her onto shore.

"How many times must I say that I have excellent hearing?"

"But... Okay." Pinkie shook her head, smiling. Some things just were.

The sun was beginning to hang low in the sky, which meant that we still had a couple of hours left of sunlight. As Pinkie touched down on the shoreline, I opened the picnic basket, withdrawing a towel for her.

"Here you are," she took it from me and started rubbing down, "I hope you're okay with what I made."

"You made it?" He voice was muffled from under the towel, "I'm sure it'll taste great!"

That remained to be seen. Being a creature that didn't need to cook food, I rarely did. Eating magical food wasn't tasty but... I finished setting out the platters when I heard a loud gasp. My head shot up, wondering what was the matter. She was only looking at the food and I relaxed a bit, smug smile slowly creeping onto my lips.

"Wow Dizzy, this looks wonderful!" I watched as her eyes leapt from salad (with starfruit of course) to melon cubes, to berries and cream, to a very sad looking pie.

"I am glad you think so. It was hard trying to think of a herbivore meal."

"...You ...eat meat?"

I cringed (sadly it was not inwardly) and nodded.

"I'm an omnivore Pinkie. I have... aspects of me that need the meat."

"Oh..." She looked at the checkered blanket and I thought that I had said the one thing that would turn her away.

"So..." She continued, "You can eat this too?"

"Yes." I watched her eyes flicker over the food, unsure of her thought process.

"Good because I don't think I could watch you eat... meat."

"And you never will." I said firmly, promising her.

"...Good." She sat down and grabbed a slice of apple. That could have broken the relationship right there... She might have a pet alligator but I doubted Pinkie gave him anything fresh. It could have even been made from animals that died of natural causes. I shook my head, not wanting to dwell on it. We were uncustomarily quiet through the meal, each wrapped up in our own thoughts.

"Can I have some pie?"

Her voice brought me out of my self-loathing thoughts and into the present.

"Of course," I snapped a plate into existence and cut a piece for her, "Though you probably won't like it."

She took a bite once I settled it down in front of her, and chewed thoughtfully.

"Hmm..." She licked her lips, getting the blackberry juice from her chin.

"I think you used too much leavener, but it is great otherwise!"

I blinked, "Really?"

"Yeah, here," she held up a piece on her hoof, "try it!"

I leaned over, grabbing her cannon gently so it wouldn't move and licked the concoction off her hoof. Not bad. I've certainly made worse. I licked my lips before looking back at Pinkie, who was staring at me. My lion's paw rubbed over her hoof gently to get a crumb that lodged itself there.

"Dizzy." I let my paw drop and smiled at her. She smiled back and scootched closer to me. This was what I wanted. Just being with her, like this. Chaos or not, I felt wonderful with her body heat beside me. The sun had begun to set, making the clouds pink like cotton candy. Which Pinkie pointed out. Before long we were trying to describe to each other the different clouds we saw, munching on various snacks. Before long, the sun was almost completely hidden and the mare was snuggling up for warmth. I decided that that was a good time to take her home.

"I really enjoyed myself tonight," The mare said, looking up at me.

"I'm glad." I walked on all fours beside Pinkie, her fur lit by the full moon she was radiant. Her pink hair was highlighted by the moonbeams, stars twinkling prettily behind her and I pulled my gaze away. I wondered if anypony else saw Pinkie in that light.

When we hit the cobblestone of the village our paws, claws, and hooves clacked noisily. All other Ponyvillians, it seemed, were home and ending their day. The lights from open windows flooded the streets with an odd glow that made me miss the purity of the star and moonlight. When we finally arrived at Sugarcube Corner I felt at a loss. What did ponies say at this point?

"Pinkie Pie." She turned away from the door to face me. "I had a wonderful time tonight. I hope you did as well."

"Oh I sure did!" I sighed, relieved, "Next time, I'll plan it, okie doki?"

I nodded vigorously, glad to have that responsibility taken off my shoulders. The silence between us stretched, and I couldn't seem to think of anything else to say.

"I'd better turn in..."

"Right, of course." I said, watching her open the door. Light from upstairs rushing outside. Pinkie was almost over the threshold when I blurted out a 'wait!'.

She turned to me, smiling and I leaned in a bit.

"May I kiss you?"

Her face darkened in a blush as I saw Incer trot down the stairs. He saw what was happening, and silently returned up the stairs.

"Yes."

I almost didn't realise what she had agreed to, seeing the stallion had put me off my game. Her hooves shuffled nervously as I leaned down. My claw brushed a loose curl away from her face before cupping her jawline. Her eyes sparkled beautifully before she closed them. I leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. She gripped my claw as I pulled back.

"That's it?"

I was at a loss, and I felt my eyes grow wider. I hadn't wanted to spook her away!

"Come here." She curled a free hoof behind my head and pulled me gently against her lips. I kissed her back, heart exploding in emotion as I felt her lips move against mine. It was glorious, her hoof keeping me close and her lips. Oh yes, her lips... And as quickly as it started, she pulled away, satisfied.

"Goodnight Dizzy." She smiled and closed the door behind her. I stared at the door in wonder. What had changed in courting since I had been away? I grinned toothily. It was fine by me. What a kiss! My claw came up and traced my lips before I poofed myself home.

I closed the door and leaned against it, both happy and mortified. I kissed Discord! King of Chaos and Disharmony... and... I liked it. I smiled, he liked it too, that much I knew. I fell back to all fours, walking upstairs. He was a great guy, really. Did he know I liked him that way? I mean... A kiss on the forehead?

"The joys of being courted by a dinosaur are becoming apparent already."

Maybe that was how things were done in Discord's time. It would have been fine except... I wanted more. I nodded, happy with my choice. When I hit the landing I saw Incer was on his bed, reading.

"You're home late." He put the book down, sitting up.

"You're up late."

"Yes well... I worry." He shrugged, "How was it?"

I regaled the evening in detail, knowing now, since we made peace, he knew better than to play the knight constantly.

"The forehead?" He questioned, not quite accepting the idea.

"Yeah! And when I asked him if that was it he got so flustered that I kissed him!"

Incer's mouth tightened a moment before nodding, "Sounds like you really like this guy."

"I really do." I grinned, getting up to prepare for bed.

Incer mumbled something before piping up with a goodnight. I repeated the greeting before going into the bathroom. My mind wandered back to the kiss. He was so hesitant, so unsure until I took the reins. His mouth... my tummy filled with butterflies. I brushed through my hair absentmindedly.

He was... gumdrops. Do all mares get this way after a kiss? What would the next kiss be like? Those thoughts followed me when I turned off the lights and continued as I crawled into bed.

A/N: Hello everypony!
Oh dear god I'm so sorry I've taken so long! _

I don't have an excuse... Just life getting in the way of living I suppose. I am sorry though, I am trying to work out a better way to keep updating.

I want to work on my novel soon so... I will probably be speeding things up a bit (squee!) for these two lovebirds.