Three chapters in three days, isn't this amazing? I have to warn you in advance that this is another angsty chapter and might be slightly triggering, but I'm proud of my work because I think this chapter is rather deep.
Also thank you for your amazing reviews! I'm glad you like the story so far and the quotes as well. I actually put much thoughts into choosing them & sometimes it takes up to an hour to find the perfect one!
About one review in particular: I got that Despicable me quote and I love this movie!
But now enjoy reading and don't forget to review again!

"I suddenly realized. The zebra. It is not something outside of us. The zebra is something inside of us. Our fears. Our own self-destructive nature. The zebra is the worst part of us when we are face-to-face with our worst times. The demon is us!"

― Garth Stein

It wasn't until a few days later that the next flashbacks hit her after thinking that things were slowly getting better.
The trigger had been small, but the reaction had been strong. As soon as the words had left Tony's mouth she ran towards the bathroom and slammed the door behind her.
- - - - - - - -

"Your body is a weapon Ziva and you should be old enough to understand this." She was standing in her father's office, her head bent, her shoulders drawn in.
"I trust you with this mission, do not disappoint me." He had told her with a voice as cold as ice.
She had only been 16 when he directed those words towards her and she knew she would have to comply.

At this time she was already indifferent to most situations in her life, but what he demanded from her was almost too much.
She didn't have a choice though, did she?

It hurt her that her father was merely seeing her as a weapon, not as a daughter as it was supposed to be.
"Yes abba." She had replied meekly and with that she got ready for the first time she would use her body to get the information her father wanted.

Tony shot up as soon as he saw her running towards the bathroom, coming up straight behind her.
He tried to grab her wrists but as soon as she got hold of her she wriggled out of his hold and with that slammed the door of the bathroom right in front of him.
For a brief moment Tony had to compose himself and take a deep breath before entering the bathroom as well.

"No Ziva." He almost whispered, but the anger in his voice made it sound louder than he intended to.
In this moment he just felt so helpless as she started retching right in front of him, not caring that he was in the same room.

"Please Ziva, please." His voice was filled with anguish as he knelt down next to her and started stroking her back.
He couldn't stand seeing her like this, seeing her destructing herself. It was just so wrong and she shouldn't deal with her emotions like this.

Trying to calm her down he kept rubbing her back but at the same time the irrational thoughts kept racing through his mind.
Deep down he knew it was not her fault, but there was something else inside of him that practically screamed that she should just stop, that she should grow up and deal with everything properly.

It really was a battle inside of him and he didn't even realize when a few tears started to make their way down his face.
They were angry tears, sad tears and tears showing that he was disappointed. Disappointed that he couldn't stop her from destroying herself.

A few minutes later she had completely emptied her stomach and sunk back against the cold tiles, exhausted from all the retching.
It was only then that she saw the slight tear streaks on his face and the mere sight of them made her break down anew.

"I am sorry Tony." She brought out between the sobs rising from her throat.
"No Ziva." The pain was still evident in his words. "You can't keep doing this."
He knew what he was doing was wrong but he really couldn't help it at this very moment.

"I do not know what else to do." She avoided his gaze by looking down while the tears continually streamed down her cheeks no matter how hard she tried to hold them back.

When he looked at her tiny, shaking frame, huddled against the wall he knew it was a mistake to let out his anger and desperation in front of her.
"I'm sorry Zi, I did not mean to upset you." He softly spoke up and tried to cradle her into his embrace.

At first she tried to fight him off, her fists weakly punching against his chest but after a moment she stopped struggling and relaxed into his arms and started sobbing more violently.
"Oh Zi, I know it is hard. But we can get through this, together." He soothed her, knowing she would need some time to calm down.

As soon as he felt her body stop trembling he gently lifted her up from the cold floor and scooped her up into his arms to carry her to the couch.
Carefully setting her down on it he sat down next to her and pulled her into his embrace once more.
"You want to talk about it?" He quietly whispered into her ear.

"My father always told me that my body was nothing more than a weapon. He made me use it to get the information he wanted. I was only 16." Her voice was so small that he had to listen intently to understand her words.
"The first time…it just hurt so much." With that she started sobbing again, hot tears trailing down her cheeks anew.

Tony couldn't quite believe what he had just heard. Of course he had known about the methods they used at Mossad but this was just too much for him to bear.
How could a father force his own daughter to have sex with a stranger to get information? How could he do this to an innocent child?

"Oh Zi." Once again he was rendered speechless but he knew he had to say something, anything.
"Your body is so much more than just a weapon. You are so much more than a weapon." He stopped for a brief moment. "You are a wonderful person Ziva, you are loved." His words finally started to calm her down and she was once again overwhelmed by his words.

"Thank you Tony." She finally whispered and he simply pulled her a little tighter in respond.
"Nothing to thank for sweet cheeks, nothing to thank for." He murmured and it was true because he would do anything for her to make her feel better.

One more thing: When you leave a review (*hint hint*) you can also insert your wishes for upcoming chapters. Just tell me what you want to see/read in the future!

PS: Tell me when you get tired of the sappy ends ;)