Alright this is another smaller chapter but will probably lead up to a longer chapter again. Let's call this an "explanatory" chapter and with that you can go straight to reading!

"Eating was hard. Breathing was hard. Living was hardest."

― Laurie Halse Anderson

On Friday she had her next appointment with Dr. Parker and got the chance to process her latest flashback and the emotions it had brought up in her.

They were about halfway through the session when Lauren spoke up after a moment of silence.
"Ziva, may I ask you about your eating habits lately? Have the flashbacks influenced them in any way?" Right when Ziva and Tony had entered her office she had noticed how thin she had gotten throughout the past weeks and was worried that she wasn't eating properly.

The concerned look in Tony's eyes confirmed her suspicions even before Ziva had the chance to answer.
"It is not so easy at the moment." She now replied while looking down and fidgeting with her fingers to avoid eye contact with either of them.

"What exactly does that mean?" Lauren now dug deeper knowing this conversation was way past her comfort zone.
"I am not really hungry and sometimes I…" Ziva trailed off and Tony sensing her discomfort finished the sentence for her.

"She's been throwing up several times lately. Mostly when she had a flashback or felt overwhelmed." Tony was clearly worried about her behaviour and shot Dr. Parker an almost pleading look.
"Ziva?" She now addressed her again before continuing. "Would it be ok if I weigh you now?"

Ziva was reluctant but finally agreed on stepping onto the scale all the while not able to look at the numbers on the display.
Lauren on the other hand noted the number in her file and together they sat back down where Tony was still waiting.

"Do you know your height?" Her voice was now more business-like as she tried to figure out how bad it really was.
"Uhm, I think I'm around 5'7." She quietly replied as her fingers nervously fidgeted with the hem of her shirt. Tony noticed this and gently took one of her hands in his in order to soothe her a little.
After a few moments Lauren spoke up again with a serious look in her eyes.

"According to the scale you only weigh around 115 lbs which is extremely low considering your height. Additional you show clear signs of malnourishment." She let the news sink in for a moment.
"We really need to work on this Ziva; there are many risks for your health in this state." Lauren paused for a brief moment.

"Underweight and malnourished persons are more likely to feel tired and exhausted and you can faint at any time. Your entire body will change and women sometimes even suffer from infertility."
And with that she was hit with the hard reality. She hadn't intended to risk her health like that and yet she couldn't stop herself from doing it.

"I should have made her eat more." Tony now sighed as a sense of guilt washed over him.
"None of this is your fault Tony." Lauren now reassured him. "The reasons for her eating habits are different ones and we will have to work on a plan to make sure her body gets the nutrients it needs. Because if it keeps going like this I will have to admit you to the hospital."
As soon as Ziva heard those words she started crying silently, the tears relentlessly streaming down her cheeks.

She hated hospitals and didn't think it would come to this but now she had to face the consequences and she was seemingly overwhelmed.

"Please no hospital, please." She now pleaded and Tony understood her since they shared their hate for them.
"Oh hey, neither of us wants to see you at the hospital, but Lauren is right we need to do something." Tony softly whispered and brushed away the tears from her damp cheeks.

"It is important that you eat three meals a day Ziva. You can start off with small portions but the routine is important for your recovery. I know it might be difficult in the beginning but I'm sure Tony is going to help you to keep track of it, right?" Lauren nodded towards him.

"Do you think you can do this Zi?" They both waited for a reply while Ziva composed herself.
"I think I can do this." An ever so small smile played on her lips and she took a shaky breath as she looked at Lauren and Tony.

"Alright, I think it's enough if you come back next Friday. That will give you some time to adjust to the changes and we can talk about your progress in a week, ok?" Lauren smiled at her.
Both Tony and Ziva now nodded and said their goodbyes before heading out into the fresh autumn air with both of their minds racing.

Thanks again for your reviews & don't forget to leave one under this chapter as well (maybe including some ideas/wishes?)
As to why I use "Zi" as a nickname: I would call it artistic freedom, don't forget this is fiction after all ;)
And don't worry there will be some lighter chapters in the future (come at me with your ideas *cough cough*)!