Author's Note: Put down your pitchforks. I know I made you wait for it but ooh look it's extra long. Forgive me?
Dean's eyes are on the white board as his elderly teacher continues writing out an impossibly long string of numbers that he's sure is supposed to mean something but damned if he knew what. It becomes a blurry background as he loses his focus for about the 8th time that class.
It didn't mean anything. It was natural to get turned on by making out. With your eyes closed.. it doesn't matter.
He remembers the second Cas had taken charge of it and started pressing back. Confident and overwhelmingly intense. Damn if he didn't catch on quick.
The teacher turns to face the class, droning on about the equation as Dean chews a pencil.
It was normal. With your eyes closed.. its all the same. Like if he was getting a blow job.. eyes shut it all probably felt the same.
He drops the pencil and it rolls off his desk. Dean looks around self-consciously like someone could hear his thoughts.
Whoa, where the hell had that come from? And now he can't not see Cas' head bent over his lap.. hair all disheveled from the wind.. or maybe from fingers grabbing it.. and pink lips all puffy and his soft, warm tongue..
The bell rings and Dean jumps. Kids file out and he slowly gets to his feet.
Pamela holds out his pencil. "Do quadratic equations turn ya on, baby?"
"Huh?" He takes it and puts it behind his ear.
She licks her lips and pointedly glances at his slightly tented jeans.
"Shit." He breathes and quickly moves his books to cover his erection.
Smiling like the cat that ate the canary, she says, "Heard you and Barbie are splitsville? Since I dumped that ass, Jesse, I've been awfully lonely."
Dean eyes her up and down. Tight Ramones tank top, faded black jeans and belt with pyramid studs.. she'd probably eat him alive. "Oh, yeah?" This was not exactly the time he wanted to have this talk with his boner already on display.
"Come find me if you wanna hang out sometime.. we could talk fractions and decimal points." She waggles her eyebrows suggestively before brushing past him, making sure to take extra long. Dean inhales, trying to keep any part of him from touching her further. Breathing out raggedly, he heads to lunch.
Walking through the courtyard, he sees Charlie sitting under a tree eating a sandwich. Dean changes his direction and heads her way.
"Hey."
"Sup Winchester. How goes it?"
"You mind company?"
"My tree is your tree."
He sits down beside her. "Want half a PB&J?"
"Sure. Thanks." He takes it and they eat, enjoying the sun with the cooler air making it nice out.
Dean clears his throat and says, "So..Just slap me if this is off limits.."
"Oh, I get to slap you? You live dangerously." She turns to him smiling.
Dean rolls his eyes. "When did you know?"
"Know what?"
"That you were.."
"C'mon use your big boy words." She grins taking another bite.
"That you were into girls."
"Since I was 6 and saw Return of the Jedi."
Dean eyebrows pinch together.
"Slave Leia in a gold bikini."
"Oh right." He glances down at his last bite of sandwich. Charlie watches him over her can of diet coke before taking a sip.
"But ya know.. I bet most people take longer."
Dean twists his lips and nods. "And you don't ever look twice at guys?"
"Well.. I mean if Johnny Depp came up to me and just had to have his way with me.. I probably wouldn't turn him down but otherwise not really."
"How'd your mom take it?"
"She.. Fine."
Dean's seen a lot of Charlie's smiles but this one didn't seem right. "She just-"
"So anyway who's this Cas?" Charlie talks over him quickly. Dean stutters, "Who?"
"Your mom thought I was someone named Cas. Is that like.. a friend?"
"Yeah, he's a friend."
"Oh." She nods her head with raised eyebrows and wide eyes.
"What?" Even to him it sounds defensive.
"Nothing. So you wanna try to make it to World 5 in Mario later?"
"Uh, sure. Are you gonna cheat again?"
"It's entirely possible."
Dean's rushing to World History when he turns a corner and runs straight into a solid wall in the shape of a suit. Shuffling back, he sees it's actually a man with a barrel chest. Bald, Black and looking down his nose at him.
"Dean Winchester."
"Uh, yeah?"
Was this a new teacher? Why did he know his name?
Suddenly, he's grabbed by the collar of his shirt and slammed into a set of lockers. Dean winces when his head hits.
"You will stop encouraging Castiel."
"What?! Who the hell are you?"
Kids laugh and rush by, seeming not to notice their little scene.
"Watch your tone, Mud Monkey. I'm the one who's going to turn you into dust if you continue your association with the angel."
A locks digs into his back. He'd scream but Dean can't get a breath with the beefy hand around his throat squeezing. He squirms futilely trying to draw attention but no one even pauses as they pass them.
"I suggest you be a good little Neanderthal and heed my words."
He's pulled forward by the neck just to be slammed back-
Dean jerks in his seat, making a short yell and the class laughs.
"Bad dream, Mr. Winchester?" His World History teacher says smoothly.
Blinking and realizing where he is, Dean tries to make a joke to cover his embarrassment. "The worse. I was in World History and.. Oh wait."
After the class calms down, the teacher says, "Very amusing. Perhaps you can tell your jokes to the principle after class."
Dean internally groans and sinks down in his seat. Awesome.
He gets a detention and catches Charlie after the bell to let her know he won't be able to meet up. When he gets home, his mom predictably grounds him and Dean sulks in his room most of the evening.
It's late and he's doing English homework, books open on the bed, when Cas steps down off his windowseat.
"Uh, Hey." He looks up, surprised to see him again so soon or even at all.
"Hello, Dean." Cas comes towards him and then is just sitting on the bed across from him. Like nothing happened.
Fuck. He really wasn't expecting to have to deal with seeing him again today.
"Weren't you ordered away or something?" He catches a snippet of his weird dream for a second but lets it go when Cas positively smirks and says, "I was. I am being disobedient."
Dean's eyebrows raise and he ignores the pulse in his jeans. Cas almost looks mischievous.
"Ain't that gonna get you in trouble?"
He just shrugs and picks up Dean's English book, turning it towards him.
Seriously, they were just going to sit here and not talk about it. Which is good. Right. Don't say anything. Stop thinking about it. It was a one time thing. Cas was just curious and Dean.. helped. Why should it be weird now? Cas looked the same. Acted the same. Stop thinking about it.
He dragged his eyes from Cas' mouth to his arm. The nasty slice seemed to be closing and healing over even though it had only been a day.
"So your uh wound looks better." His arm was up and hovering between them before he remembered last time.
"You can touch me, if you want."
Dean traces it with his finger tip. It's less ragged than before.
"Why can't you just heal it?"
"It was made with a weapon I am not impervious to."
"What happened?"
"Dean.."
"Who I am gonna tell?"
"It's for your own protection."
"Yeah, whatever."
Dean takes back his English book and turns it around to fake reading it. They're quiet for a while until Cas says, "I've never had a friend before, Dean." He lowers the book to see Cas is not facing him. "I would not want to place you in danger. I have only ever had my brothers and sisters. Rarely among my own kind have I found those I share an affinity with. And after.." His eyebrows wedge together and he takes a deep breath. "After Anna.." He doesn't say anything else and after another minute Dean sets the book next to him and scoots a little closer.
"Cas, who's Anna?"
He doesn't answer, just continues to stare off to the left.
"She the one who left?"
"Yes." One word but it's filled with worlds of loss. "After that.. I didn't.. I never.. I'm not very good at communicating."
It was plain weird to see him fumbling like this. So unsure.
"You do all right." Dean gives him a small smile when Cas looks up to meet his eyes.
"It is strange that I am able to connect with a human better than my own brethren."
"Eh, you just can't resist the Winchester Charm." He laughs cockily, but Cas only stares until the moment stretches and his words hang in the air. Soon he's staring at Cas' mouth and remembering when his lips were swollen and slick. It's too much to be sitting on his bed like this.. just like last night. He's starting to feel flustered. Restless. Itchy.
"Hey, you wanna get outta here?"
"You want me to leave?"
"No, I mean.. I'd go with you."
"Where would you want to go?"
"Anywhere. Just outside somewhere. Get some fresh air."
"There is a clearing not far from here in the woods."
"Awesome."
Dean gets up and slips into his boots. After bending to lace them up, he goes to grab his flannel from his closet. Cas is behind him, too close and Dean immediately backs up, facing him.
"Oh uh, I'll just sneak out downstairs."
"You do not want to fly?"
Fly, yes. Have Cas pressed tight against him…
"Dean, I'll still need to take you to the clearing. It's too great a distance for you to walk."
Dammit. Why had he thought this would be better? He just needed to get outside where he could breathe. Where he could think.
"Yeah alright." He sighs and steps up on the sill, bracing his arms on the frame. Dean closes his eyes when arms encircle his torso and Cas doesn't hesitate or ask if he's ready this time. He pushes forward and they're off.
Soon Dean forgets about feeling awkward and just revels in the cool night air beating at his face. Within minutes his feet are touching earth and Cas lets him go, stepping back to sit cross-legged in the grass. That wasn't so bad.. maybe he was the one making it weird.
"Is this adequate?"
"Yeah, this works." He sits near the angel with his legs stretched out, arms straight a little behind his back to bare his weight.
The sky was wide and went on forever above them. You could see thousands and thousands of lights, burning little pinpricks. Breeze ruffles the leaves and Dean sits up to fold his arms. Cas doesn't even react, even with his arms bare and stark pale in the moonlight and feet buried in the cool grass.
"You guys don't get cold either?"
Cas turns and frowns at his hunched posture. He leans forward and Dean jerks back thinking he's going to try and kiss him again but instead he's surrounded by a familiar softness. Even over the barrier of his sleeves, it's a light weight encircling him. The wind abruptly cuts off, as if there's a force field around his body. He's actually warm now but he still shivers when the phantom feathers cocooning him touch the back of his neck. Dean enjoys the pleasant sensation of being wrapped up in a soft bubble for a few more seconds before shrugging his shoulders.
"Thanks but um.. just keep your wings to yourself, kay?"
Cas rolls his shoulders and the warmth leaves him, but he still tingles where they touched his cheek and neck. Hearing the shuffle of invisible wings, Dean asks, "Hey Cas, can I see you fly? I mean, you're always just there. I wanna see.." He looks up and realized he moved closer when he was talking. "Nevermind."
Cas cocks his head and they just stare for what feels like too long. Yep, this was way better, Dean thought sarcastically.
Without a word, Cas gets to his feet. Sparing a moment to glance down at Dean, he then points his face up at the stars and bends his knees like he's about to jump but when he kicks off the ground.. his bare feet don't land again.
Dean watches open mouthed as Cas glides lithely through the air, climbing higher and higher only to arch his back and dive backwards. Down he plummets right at him before swooping so close that Dean feels feathers touch his ear when he flies by.
"Whoa.." Dean's mouth falls open.
If he squints he can almost imagine he sees darks shapes pushing him forward or maybe it's his brain filling in the missing piece for him. Cas' back muscles and shoulder blades work and roll in a way he's not used to seeing on any human. After a few more minutes of what Dean's sure is showing off at this point, Cas' feet touch the ground and he walks a few feet before he can slow his momentum to stop in front of him again.
Dean gapes up at him with wide eyes as he breathes slow and even out.
"You watch me as if this is some feat but I assure you it is not."
"Cas, no. You're fucking amazing."
Cas just holds his gaze until Dean blushes and looks off. "Really, though. You're all graceful and shit." Laughing, he finishes, "I'd make a sucky angel. Probably bump into my window like a fly."
"I think you would be a beautiful angel."
Dean grins but rolls his eyes. "Dudes don't call each other beautiful, Cas.. but thanks."
He's focused on him with such intensity.. not saying anything else so Dean gets to his feet, talking nervously to fill the silence.
"So you're training or whatever all the time, right? Teach me a move or something."
Castiel seems taken back and says, "We use blades made of grace to spar. You would not be able to fight as we do."
"You started off trying to stick each other? That's one hell of a learning curve."
Cas' bunched eyebrows smooth and he says, "When I was younger, my brothers would make a game of attempting to subdue one another as practice. I could show you how to attack as they did."
"Okay, what'll we do?"
"They would engage in combat mid-air. The first to be grounded and say Tootsie Pop was the defeated."
Dean's still laughing when he asks, "Tootsie Pop?"
"It is my brother's rule. I don't know what it means."
"It's candy. I'll bring you one. Alright, well no flying. That's cheating."
"But that is how I would fight, Dean. I would never allow myself to be weakened by staying in one place while an enemy attacks me."
"Yeah well pretend your pixie dust ran out and you're stuck on the ground."
Cas frowns but stays put, toes curling in the grass. "First, you must always be moving."
Dean starts walking backwards as the angel moves towards him.
"Hold up. Obviously I won't be able to take you on in a straight fight."
Cas pauses. "What do you suggest, then?"
"My watch has a stopwatch button. Maybe.. see if I can keep on my feet for five minutes?"
"Very well."
Looking up from hitting the clock, Dean winces at the glint in his eye. "You're gonna knock me on my ass, aren't you?"
"Only if you let me." Cas says beginning to walk forward again. Dean's heartbeat picks up and he watches him as he moves backwards again.
"Sparring, we are taught never to allow an opponent to entrap or surround us. Try to shove me away from you to keep your distance. If I am able to get too close, you would be defeated. My wings can wrap tight to hold you in place or my flight feathers can lacerate deep if the edges are whipped hard enough."
Feeling a brush against his cheek, Dean bats it away with the back of his hand. Cas smirks at him as he takes a few threatening steps closer. Dean quickly focuses on keeping space between them again.
"Man, this is a kinda like when Yoda-"
Cas strikes quick, grabbing him by the wrist and turning so his own arm is painfully twisted in front of him and his back is up against a hard chest.
"Pay attention." Cas says in his ear from behind him, amusement evident in his voice.
Breathing unsteady, Dean grunts as he elbows him, spinning away at the same time.
Cas lets him and calmly starts to circle him. Dean keeps him in his sights, turning with him. Cas is playing with him, hardly looking at him. His heart is hammering in his chest but he's pretty sure he's about to win this thing by running out the clock.
Dean makes the mistake of checking his watch to see he still has a minute left when Cas snatches his arm and kicks his feet out from under him. Cas has a knee on his chest and simply waits.
"You know what to say." He seems positively smug.
Cas has him on the ground but Dean's strong too. He grips his upper arms and pushes up to force Cas off to fall next to him. They roll a few times but Cas still ends up on top sitting on his thighs. Dean grunts and struggles as Cas manages to knock his hands away easily and get them pinned to the grass by his head.
Staring up at his steady blue eyes, they gasp for breath and with horror, Dean realizes during all the wrestling around.. he's gotten hard. Cas has to feel it and is probably disgusted if he even realizes what it is.
"Tootsie pop," Dean pants.
Cas only tilts his head just a fraction.
"I said Tootsie-"
He's cut off by Cas' lips catching his. Dean's surprise is overwhelmed by the talented tongue sweeping in to brush with his over and over again. Shit, he was a quick learner. Cas moves down to suck and nip at his bottom lip.. something Dean hadn't taught him.
Lost in the moment, Dean's lifts his head up, trying to reconnect their mouths when Cas pulls back to ask, "How do I make the marks?" before kissing him again. The words don't even make sense to Dean's foggy brain. Could he have been kissed stupid?
"Huh?"
"The marks. Have you made them before? Would you show me, Dean?" Cas asks on his hands and knees above him, caging his body. His palms are in the grass by Dean's head.. which means he's free. Has been, he realizes. Cas had long since let go of his wrists but Dean had kept his arms as if they'd still been pinned. He can move now. He has to move now. Move, dammit.
Dean snaps out of his haze and sucks in a breath.
"Cas, this is wrong." He sits up on elbows first and then scoots back along the grass until he's sitting across from him. Cas just watches.
"Why?"
Why? Christ, he's so turned on it's hard to think.
"We can't just keep doing this."
"I find kissing you to be very pleasurable and I'm told this is natural."
That's what he'd been telling himself all day.. but it wasn't natural. This wasn't normal. Not for him anyway. Dean huffs, realizing his pants are tented and shifts around so he's facing away, embarrassed by his arousal and the conversation.
"Dean?"
"Just give me a goddamn minute, okay?" He barks, covering his front with a hand, waiting for his erection to go down.
"Why would you be ashamed of what is a normal bodily function for humans?"
Dean glares over his shoulder. "Oh don't go saying humans like you don't have wood either."
Cas frowns in confusion.
"You're.." he gestures vaguely towards Cas' groin. "..hard."
Cas looks down then back up to meet his eyes steadily. "I haven't said I was otherwise." He blinks and blushes when he realizes he'd been staring at the criss-cross of black cord and Cas was just letting him. Dean turns away again so he stops looking towards the bulge straining tight in leather.
Jesus. This is crazy. And stupid. Crazy, stupid and fucked up but it's been months since he'd been all hot n' heavy with anyone, besides Cas the previous night, and with the kiss still so fresh..
Dean mentally shakes himself. He's just worked up.
"You can't kiss me anymore, okay? And I definitely can't freaking mark you or whatever. Kisses, hickeys.. all on the let's never go there again list. Got it?"
Cas furrows his brow and presses his lips but Dean has to get it all out so he understands.
"Look, this is stuff people who.. it's personal and.. Can't we just go back to how it was before?"
Castiel turns away from him with one arm hooked around a bent leg. "My apologizes if I made you uncomfortable. I mistakenly believed you enjoyed kissing me as well."
Dean doesn't correct him but looks down guiltily.
"And I will attempt to find another human to educate me on the other matter."
"Cool yeah, it's just- wait what?"
Cas is racking his fingers through the grass, still not facing him. "My brother assures me I am not unappealing to your kind and would be able to find an enthusiastic human to show me these things."
That.. irritates him. Which is dumb since it should be exactly what he wants.
"Aren't you supposed to be observing or some shit? Why would your bro give you this pro human pep talk?" Dean air quotes observing with sarcasm.
"A few of my brothers have less conventional views on interacting with humanity. While my exchanges have been limited, I have no doubt I will be successful in finding a willing partner."
"Oh." Dean frowns hard at the ground.
After neither of them speaks for a while, Cas turns back suddenly and asks, "How is your friend, Charlie?"
"Um.. fine.. so when you say you're gonna go find a human.."
"Yes, Dean?"
"Well I mean isn't that a little less than angelic. Trolling for chicks and-"
"I am reasonably certain I would prefer a male human for this purpose."
"Right.." Dean breathes out. Well that wasn't totally unexpected. Then he suddenly can't get a slide show of sordid images out of his head.. Cas in an alley behind a club with some twink guy in eyeliner and tight jeans being all aggressive with him. Would Cas want someone like that? It leaves a bad taste in his mouth and he's flat not paying attention when he asks about Sam or something.
Dean interrupts him mid sentence with, "Look, Cas if you just want someone to show you.." He trails not knowing how to finish. Cas stops and raises his eyebrows. "I mean, I don't want you to have to go somewhere else and get hurt or something." Who else would get Cas' odd ways and be as patient.
He gets a condescending look. "I'm an angel, Dean. A mere human would not be able to harm me."
Dean chews on his lip, irked by this blurry mental creation of some guy corrupting Cas. Taking advantage of his naiveté and..
"Yeah well I don't want you to.. to have to go to someone you don't know. We're friends and if all you want is for me to give you a hickey.." Never would he have thought he'd be sitting here with sweaty palms offering to suck on another dude's neck.
"Are you sure?"
What would it take.. a minute, two tops? Without kissing it was just sucking on someone's neck. It'd probably be awkward as hell and he'd feel a little ridiculous but without making out, it wouldn't be all hot. He'd just do it fast so Cas would get the gist of it.
Cas' eyes dart over his face.. he's probably red as a tomato.. before asking, "Can you not pretend that I am her? The one that previously left your marks.. just to show me?"
It wasn't the worst idea and his dick sure wasn't objecting. Yeah he'd just close his eyes and imagine Amanda.
He swallows and says, "You'd be up for that?"
"I wouldn't mind if it would make you more comfortable." He crawls back towards Dean who puts out a hand on his chest to stop him. Cas waits for Dean to decide.
Finally, Dean lowers his hand and gruffly gets out, "Just so you can learn.." He exhales a little shakily. This felt like an excuse, like an out. His cock is throbbing now, but he tries to ignore it.
In truth, Amanda never liked him leaving hickeys because she said she didn't want to look like a leopard for three days. Though on him she sure didn't mind.
Dean scoots forward on the grass as Cas slides that little bit closer to sit next to him, facing the other way. Almost hip to hip.
Then he just waits.
"Um okay.."
Stop talking. Jesus. Should he just start? Just.. attack his neck? At school in the supply closet it usually came after lots of kissing first but he's not even gonna touch that idea. That was too intimate and too real.
Dean takes a breath and dips his head towards Cas' neck, trying not to touch him anywhere else. He opens his mouth and closes his lips over the hollow there and Cas shudders a second. Feeling skittish, he pauses but hears, "Please continue."
Dean does. Before he can stop himself he says, "God, you're so freaking warm." He burrows into his neck to tongue over where his pulse is beating quick. And hey angels have pulses. Well if they got boners, they must have blood pumping and.. Stop thinking! Gripping his chin, Dean turns his head away to give himself more space. He starts sucking a little when he licks now. Cas inhales sharply but doesn't otherwise move. Dean's tongue suddenly tingles a little when it touches skin like he's licked an outlet or something. He pulls back and licks his lips.
Cas turns to him. "Did you do it already?"
"What? Oh, lemme see."
Cas faces away again to bare his neck. Moonlight hits it to show a faint redness and saliva but that's it.
"Nothin' yet."
"Please continue then, Dean."
"Alright but it's kinda awkward like this."
Without getting into Cas' lap he couldn't exactly get a good angle. And that was so not happening. His back was starting to ache from bending.
"What do you suggest?"
Dean looks past him and gets up. "Maybe standing?" He points to a huge tree with a wide trunk several feet away. Castiel walks past him and Dean follows until they're both just looking at each other. Geez, this was so weird.
"Okay.. uh, can you stand um against it?"
Cas simply moves back not breaking eye contact. He can hear his wings shifting while the leaves on low hanging branches shake above them. He settles with his back against bark.
Dean huffs out in embarrassment and fidgets.
"Please, Dean."
"Yeah, okay." He gestures for Cas to turns his head then he moves closer until he can reach his neck and yes this felt easier… more like what he was used to. More like Amanda.
He slides up, reaching with his mouth and their chests press together. He spares a moment to compare Cas' hard lean muscles to a girl's soft flesh but then he latches on again. Dean briefly imagines one of their hotter sessions when he'd had her against the wall kinda like this. He sucks Cas' warm skin between his teeth and worries it, best to get this done quick already. Arms come up to grip his shoulders and he gets a shot of pride when Cas starts his deep little gasps. It's a weird power trip making a freaking angel react this way. God, he sounds all hot and needy.. Stop! Don't think about it. He pulls harder with his lips on his neck for another minute or so, Cas' head falling even further back to touch the bark and expose more skin.
This was so fucked up but it was really turning him on. He bites down and Cas jerks against him, feet sliding in the dirt as he pushes his back up, writhing in place. He can feel his stiff dick through the leather but he refuses to think about anything below the belt; especially since his own cock is straining his jeans.
Pulling back, he inspects his handy work. It's red, almost purple.. would definitely leave the mark Cas wanted. That's all he'd had to do. Cas' eyes are closed and he's breathing hard. He opens them and begins in a wrecked voice, "Is it- "
"It could be darker." Dean cuts him off, voice hoarse .
Quickly cupping his jaw to push his head aside again, he goes back to licking and biting gently against his jugular.
Just a little bit longer. A little bit more.
He gets a zing of warm energy against his tongue that he's starting to associate with Cas. And this. It drives him further when the current pulses straight to his cock.
Jesus fucking Christ.
Dean moves his right hand up to bury fingers in his short messy hair then clenches them tight. Cas doesn't tell him to stop, not like Amanda (that he's supposed to be thinking about). Instead he fucking moans impossibly low. Biting down hard on his neck he yanks again and Cas' hands fist in the back of his shirt so hard he hears a rip.
When Dean feels like he might choke on arousal, he finally pulls back to see a large, dark purple blemish. He only glimpses it for a second before Cas flips them so Dean's against the tree, the air knocked out of him.
Gasping, he asks, "What are you-"
"I want to practice what I've learned."
"Cas-"
But he's already bending forward, knocking Dean's cheek aside with his head, stubble scrapping along his jaw. It was never this rough with anyone. Or desperate. And fuck did it feel amazing.. so easy to get caught up in. But he had to stop this. It had already gone on too long. Gone too far. He was supposed to be pretending this was a chick and it was getting damn hard to do when he could feel another dude's dick starting to rub just close enough to his for him to think about changing angles.
Cas starts off gentle, softly rubbing lips right where Dean had on him.. then licks and drags his teeth over the spot like a goddamn tease. Dean rolls his eyes up, staring at leaves, and blows out a puff of air so he didn't make an embarrassing noise.
"We- we should stop." Why is he heaving like he ran a mile?
Castiel only hums in what might be agreement against his skin.
"Cas, you- Fuck!"
He'd shifted just right so their dicks were rubbing together. Dean grabbed the tree behind him with both hands down by his sides so he didn't cling onto Cas and start writhing against his body. Cas stilled, just breathing over the wet spot in the crook between his shoulder and neck. It sent shivers down his spine but Dean made himself keep from moving.
"We..we.." Dammit there was a sentence in there somewhere.
Cas presses into him tighter, cupping the back of his neck and at the same time mouthing it hotly.
"Jesus.." He sighs grabbing Cas' bare arms because he couldn't not. He needed something to hang onto. His bicep flexes under Dean's fingers as the hand on his neck moves to grip the back of his head. In a million years, he'd never have thought this was something a guy would like.. or even should like but when Cas pulled his hair so close to his scalp and bit down at the same time.. he almost came in his jeans right there.
"Cas!" He yelled out, bucking his hips to make some friction. Cas repeated the motion back at him while he held him pinned.
"O god.." Dean's eyes shut tight while his fingers dig into the pale flesh of angel arms. He tried at least to grab high up above his wound, above the silver cuff.
There was no way in hell he would tell him to stop now. He was so close. He'd never actually gone so far as to come with someone but he's not thinking about that now. And he's not thinking about Amanda either.. or any girls he's been with or what his dad, who makes colorful jokes about guys that do exactly what he's doing, would think.
All there is, is the hot little noises Cas is making and the pulling and biting and open mouth kissing at his neck and fingers clenched in his hair, a flat chest holding him in place, a stiff outline thrusting up and down over him. Pressure and friction and tension reaching its peak.
"Dean.. I.." Cas' guttural voice hitches in his ear.
"I know. It's okay." Dean gasps.
"I'm.." He makes a sound like a whine and shoves hard all at once, pressing Dean into the tree with his whole body. Dean's head lolls back, his mouth fall opens as he cries out. All he hears is white noise and he feels weightless as the good feelings rolls through him.
They stay tight together as each of them finishes their release and when his feet touch the ground, Dean realizes they were a few feet above the grass. Cas slumps so his forehead rests on Dean's shoulder before bracing his arms on either side of Dean's head to push back away from him. Dean opens his eyes to meet his sluggish gaze.
"That.. That was.."
"Not supposed to happen." Dean finishes grimly.
Cas face closes down, the awe seeping away as he tilts his head.
"You are angry."
"No shit, Sherlock." Dean shoves him back so he's free to walk away. The house is probably three miles away but he just heads in that direction. His pants are stained and wet, a further reminder of what just happened.
Cas is next to him in an instant, easily keeping up with his quick stride.
"I don't understand. You seemed.." Cas trails off.
Dean turns angrily to see him staring at his neck while absently touching his own with a fingertip. Now that the endorphins had started to fade, he could feel the sore spot. Dean reaches up to press at it and winces.
"Goddamit, did you have to go Count Dracula on me?" He studiously avoids looking at Cas' neck with his own ridiculously large hickey.
"I apologize." He says not looking the least bit apologetic. "I will improve with more practice."
Dean stops walking and Cas turns towards him.
"There won't be any practicing. I know you don't get this and maybe it's different for barefoot virgins with wings but once you go so far.. it's really hard to just stop and.. and it's just not gonna happen again, okay?"
"Dean, why are you so agitated?"
"Because this isn't me!" He gestures angrily back at the tree. "I'm not into dudes." He holds up a hand when Cas is going to say something. "Or dudes with halos. This?" He catches a glance at Cas' pants and blushes. "This is not alright." He starts walking again.
"Okay, Dean." He hears back behind him a ways.
Turning, he sees Cas hadn't followed him. "Okay? What does that mean?"
"It was never my intent to distress you. I had thought... It's not important. I would not wish to make you regret our time together. Or me. If you would prefer, I will discontinue my visitations."
Dean walks away. Then stops again and sighs through his nose. Finally he growls at the sky and turns back.
"No, I don't want that but no more of that big doe-eyed teach-me-how-to-kiss crap. I'm onto you."
Cas gives him a small sheepish smile. "Do I detect a note of forgiveness?"
Dean sighs again and says, "Yeah, whatever. I guess."
"Do you want me to take you home now?"
With the reminder of what Cas' closeness did to him still cooling uncomfortably in his jeans, he just shakes his head.
"Let's walk."
After a while, Dean can feel Cas glancing at him from his side as they walk.
"Stop it."
Cas does. Then a minute later, turns towards him again.
"What now?"
"Did I do well?"
"Are you seriously asking for a pat on the head?"
"I am not aware of how these interchanges usually culminate."
Dean rolls his eyes and isn't going to answer but he hears the slight note of uncertainty at the end.
"Considering the uncomfortable walk back we're enjoying.. yeah I'd say you did pretty damn good."
Cas dropped him back inside his window and stood on the sill while Dean stepped down inside and turned to him.
"Goodnight, Dean."
He still wore a shy smile even after they spent thirty minutes walking in silence.
"Yeah night, Cas." Dean says turning his back on him.
He didn't want to see his swollen lips and bruised neck and stained.. Well they apparently weren't stained anymore but he didn't want to see any of it. Didn't want to be reminded of his own lack of control.
Cas left with him still turned away and Dean was a little relieved. Yeah it was kinda cowardly but he felt anything but brave while he unbuttoned his wet pants to change.
He'd prayed and asked Cas to give him some space for a few days. Three days later and Cas hadn't shown up. Dean found himself being glad to avoid the issue one moment then annoyed the next. Annoyed at Cas for putting this crap into this head and himself for thinking about it too often.
He kept his jacket collar up but his mom still asked him if Charlie might want to come to dinner sometime. He doesn't bother telling her again that Charlie isn't his girlfriend because then she might want to know more about the person he was letting making a plum-sized lovebite on his neck.
It only makes him more shameful but every once in a while he touches it and gets lost in the memory of rutting against the hard line of Cas' body. An unyielding, steady pressure. Grabbing Cas' arms. His rough cheek nuzzling..
Mary yanks him out of staring at his empty window one evening to go take the trash out. Groaning, he gets up and goes downstairs. Snatching the full bag up in stride, Dean tosses it in the trashcan, then drags it to the road since tomorrow is trash day. As he turns away, he catches something out of the corner of his eye down the road. Dean squints till he sees it's a little girl on a bike.. the kind with a basket and streamers on the handlebars.
It's weird to see a kid so young out near nighttime on their road when the houses are so far apart.
She's close enough to see she's wearing a pale pink dress with puffy sleeves. Yikes, someone's mom needs to step into this decade. Her long blonde hair whips behind her as she smiles big when she passes him.
"Hi, Mister!" She waves. Dean frowns but waves back.
She continues to smile and turn back to watch him until she's out of sight.
Dean shakes his head and walks back toward the house.
Geez, what a creepy kid.
Author's Note: So my hand slipped and I accidentally wrote some sexiness. I fail at slow burns. *hangs head*