a year later

Want you back

Kate sat in the park near her brother's home in New York. She could see three teenagers walking towards her. The tallest was carrying some one on his back. He spun around the young women on his back laughed as her long sandy brown hair flew out behind her.

"Ok stop it Tim your going to make me sick" Kate looked up again that was her daughter. She got up and walked over to them. Edan froze as he saw his mother walking towards them.

"SJ we gotta go"

"What Ed's don't be stupid" she looked at her brother who tipped his head toward the women walking towards them.

"Oh Timmy I gotta go." He let her down.

"Ok see you tomorrow" he kissed her quickly before she ran off.

"Wait" Kate started to run as well till the two teens her kids had been with stopped her.

"Move"

"Why?"

"Because I said so"

"That's original" she shook her head and walked around them then started running again.

"Samantha Jane DiNozzo stop"

Sam looked behind her, her mother was catching up. Not if I can help it she pushed the next bin over she looked back it slowed her down a bit but not long enough to unlock the door.

"Ed's run open the door I'll try and hold her off" her brother nodded and bolted.

Sam did what she had before and sped up, she got home and ran in the door as soon as she was in Edan slammed it shut locking it.

"I'm not going away I just want to talk"

"Bit late for that don't you think?" Sam yelled back before walking away from the door.

Kate sat on the front step leaning against the door as tears rolled down her cheeks. She hadn't ment for any of this to happen. She didn't even realize she'd been pushing her kids away. She felt ashamed from it, she knew now that her search for Nicole had taken its toll on her family and she would have to work on putting the pieces back together. She wanted her family back she wanted her kids back. But unlike what she had tried with Nicole she was willing to do anything they asked.

She looked up as her brother walked up to her.

"What do you are you doing here?" he looked angry with her and he had every right to be she guessed.

"I know what I did was wrong and I didn't know I was doing it at the time I want to fix that. Tony and I want to fix that we want to make things right, we love our kids we always have Jay you have to believe me if I had known what I was doing I would have stopped it I would do anything for my kids. I'd take bullets for them I'd do anything"

"It's not me you have to convince it's them. They're hurt Kate they don't understand why you did what you did. You have to prove to them that you love them because they think you don't they think you only want them there so they can look after Ally and the boys while you and Tony look for Nicole. Sam's always felt second best to her, and now she feels like you don't even want her. That you only put up with her because you had to."

"That's not true"

"Well there's a seventeen year old inside who thinks other wise"

"I love Sam I always have I thought she would like the space, I didn't think or want to push her away Jay I didn't I love those kids with all my heart I would do anything for them I'd stand in front of a train for them. So would Tony if for a minute we knew what they were thinking, if Sam had just slapped us silly to make us listen, we would have. I miss them Jay they're my kids and the only things I know about them are things my ten year old tells me. I know I've been horrid and that they should hate me for what I did, and I know that trust has to be earnt not given; and that I lost theirs a long time ago but I want to work on that I want them to know they can trust me that I do love them and so does their father." Sam had been watching from the front door, she opened it her arms folded over her chest but still she looked like she was going to cry.

"Do you mean what you said, that you love us?"

"I never stopped loving you, or your brother all of you kids are on equal scales. If you had told us that you felt differently we would have done something different."

"That's the thing Edan tried but you were not interested"

"Then that's our fault, we know that yes it took us a while to see that but Sam I do love you I would do anything for you. I'm sorry if I made you feel any differently over the last few years. I know that as your mother there is no excuse for that and that is something I will have to live with the rest of my life knowing what I put you and Edan through. But I want to start fixing that I want you to be able to trust me again, and tell me things like you used to. I want my Sammy back"

Sam tried to hold back the tears she didn't want to make it that easy for her mother, she thought she hated her, for all the things she had done for all the things she had missed. But now she knew she was just hurt that at what her mother did. She wiped an escaping tear away. And before she knew it she was running down and found her self in her mother's arms.

"I just wanted to know you love me as much as you do Nicole" Kate kissed her daughters forehead they were the same height now.

"Sammy I've always loved you as much as I do Nicole it's my fault for not showing you" Kate wiped away the tears running down her daughters face.

"I love you mum"

"I love you too Sammy"

"Sam maybe a push over but I'm not what you did was wrong and it's going to take more then a few well chosen words to get me to trust you again. You abandoned us you may have lived under the same roof but you abandoned us."

"I know, and I didn't come here expecting either of you to forgive me or your father for what we have done. I came to tell you how sorry we are and how much we both love you I just wanted to see my kids again"

"We're not your kids we're Jay's kids"

"No we aren't I hid the files mum and dad got sent bogus ones I made up."

"SAM!!"

"What I just wanted to scare them I wanted them to know how if felt, I wanted them to feel what we did, you went through it for six months Edan I went through it for and year and a half. If any one should be mad it's me."

"Then why aren't you"

"I am but I also love them they are our parents no matter how flawed they are or who we say we belong to. They are the ones that bought us into this world they looked after us when we were little if we should be mad at any one it should be Nicole she's the reason of this whole dam mess. Yeah I'm still mad at them of course it will take time for old wounds to heal properly but isn't that worth a shot. Don't you want to see Ally in person again instead of over a web cam don't you want to see the boys?"

"no I don't want anything to do with them"

"fine be that way but I do and I am I want to see dad again, I want to tell him how much he did hurt I want to be able to yell at him for it and tell him how much I hated him for what he did"

"Go ahead but don't expect me to go"

"fine I wont"