The days blurred into weeks as Bella maintained a semi-permanent distance between herself, Jacob and Carlisle. She hardly spoke to her father unless it was because of work and she didn't tell a single soul about what had been uncovered that fateful night at the Cullen's'.
Utterly broken and unsure who she could trust, Bella retreated into her own world, rarely leaving the apartment unless it were to work a shift at the station or to pick up groceries from the store. Her colleagues noted how withdrawn she had become but whenever they questioned her she always replied with a smile and a short, 'I'm okay thanks.' She was always polite, but firm enough that they knew not to ask any more of her.
She knew she was in denial and that she wasn't coping well with the news about her family and she waited with terrified suspense for reality to bulldoze the limited certainty she had left.
The worst part was that he didn't even try to call. Bella had already decided that she would turn Carlisle away if he came knocking on her door, but that didn't mean she didn't want him to at least try. That was the hardest part by far, the realisation that his life would continue exactly as it had before, without her, and that it wouldn't even make a difference.
Several days later Angela was pounding on her front door, refusing to take no for an answer. The frame almost shook with the force she was using and for a moment Bella wondered whether or not she was going to break in if she didn't get an answer soon.
'Bella Swan, I swear if you don't open this door right now…' Angela's heated profanity was cut off but a small crack of light illuminating the hallway. 'Bella?' She asked gently, as though she were a timid animal that would be frightened by the slightest of movements. She barely recognised the girl who answered.
She had finally been moved by Angela's aggression, which made Bella feel irredeemably guilty because she knew her friend must have been seriously concerned to drive all the way over after work and scream abuse from behind the doorframe. She was usually so calm and patient, but evidently said patience had run dry and had been replaced with overriding concern. Realising that she had failed to return any of her friend's messages, having been so depressed as a result of her own personal crisis, Bella tried to apologise.
'But please don't try and make me go out,' Bella finished weakly, 'so much has happened and I really don't want to see anyone just yet.' Angie put her hands on her hips and looked pointedly at the dishevelled officer, who was a mere fraction of the woman she used to be just weeks before.
'This is your trouble Bella, you second guess everyone all the time, and you think you know everything.' Although there was an element of truth in what Angela said, Bella knew she only meant it light-heartedly. 'And believe it or not, on this occasion Miss Swan, you have arrived at the wrong conclusion. I'm not here to drag you out; in fact I fully intend that we do the opposite. Now go and take off that filthy uniform, put on your comfiest pair of sweats and get back out here in ten. Oh, and bring your duvet!'
Motivated by her friends' contagious energy, or perhaps just responding to the authority in her tone, Bella did exactly as she was told. She threw her dirty clothes in the empty wash basket and quickly hopped into the shower before digging out her pyjamas from underneath her bed. The hot jet of water soothed her aching muscles immediately and she emerged only minutes later feeling fresh and infinitely more alert.
Her two piece bed suit consisted of a fluffy chequered pair of trousers and a matching red and navy jumper. Feeling warm and comfortable, she took her orders even further and wrapped a thick midnight dressing gown around her small frame, tying it firmly around her waist. Relishing the feel of the thick, soft carpet underneath her bare feet, Bella pulled her double duvet from her bed, chucked a pillow over her shoulder, and returned to the living room where Angela had settled in considerably well.
She had brought in her own blanket from her car, and while Bella was changing had switched her plain jeans and t-shirt combination for a one-piece bear pyjama suit. It was brown with a furry caramel stomach, and black paws had been drawn on the feet. Her raven black hair was tied back loosely in a bouncy ponytail and her contact lenses had been replaced with wide-rimmed black frames. She looked both incredibly snuggled and ridiculously childish, and Bella had to fight to stop herself from laughing.
'Whatever, Bells,' Angie quipped, accompanying the comment with a conspicuous eye-roll, 'I don't plan on going anywhere tonight so you're the only person in all of Forks who has ever seen me in my onesie. You should count yourself lucky.'
With a snort, Bella climbed over the sofa in a fashion similar to that of a five year old and tucked her thicker quilt around the pair of them. Angela flicked on the television to the first girly movie she could find and pulled a carrier bag onto her lap. Out of it she withdrew two tubs of strawberry ice cream, two unbelievably large chocolate bars and a packet of gummy bears. Several cans of coke remained inside the bag.
'This is why I love you,' Bella mumbled through a mouthful of sweets, 'you always know the right thing to do.' Angela nabbed one of the tubs of ice cream before she replied.
'Movies and junk food is always the right thing to do. Besides its breakup stuff and all of your drama is clearly over a guy. So here's what's going to happen; you're going to tell me the story, I'll tell you how much of a jerk he is and then we will pretend this never happened, okay?'
And that was exactly what they did. Bella told Angela a heavily edited version of what had happened, and true to her good-natured character, she 'oohed' and 'aahed' in all of the right places. When she was done and a more than reasonable amount of unhealthy food had been consumed, Angela gave her own conclusions.
'One; Doctor Cullen is ridiculously attractive. I went to school with his youngest son Edward and I remember after he came to the first parent's evening we used to all see who could fake the worst injury just so they could go and visit him in the emergency room. Once Jessica Stanley, and don't pull that face, I know you two don't really see eye to eye, well one time she deliberately dropped her asthma pump in the swimming pool just to get him to prescribe her another one. I wish I was joking.'
'Don't see eye to eye? Angie, I went by Mike Newton's store to pick up some sticky tape and after she saw me talking to him at the checkout she 'accidentally' reversed into my car. She's crazy!'
They both laughed at Bella's account but it was scarily true, they both knew Jess Stanley had some issues when it came to possession.
'Anyway,' Angela interrupted, 'as I was saying. Doctor Cullen is gorgeous. What I would give to go out with him for five minutes! Point two; you deserve to be happy, Bella. I know you've been hurt before but whatever's going on with you two is something that you can work out. Relationships don't just happen, they take effort, and if you decide not to at least try and figure this one out then you have nobody to blame but yourself.' Before Bella could scream out in protest, Angela explained. 'I get it, trust me I do. I can't even begin to count the amount of times Ben has done something that has made me go absolutely crazy, but that's because I care, and you obviously do too. Don't give up on something awesome just because there are some little bumps on the way. You have a habit of pushing people away before they can really get to you, I don't want to watch you do that again this time.'
She paused to take a large drink of her coke before reiterating her third and final point.
'And lastly, I know you are going to like this bit the least. You are clearly, absolutely, head over heels crazy about this guy. I'm not going to use the 'L' word, because I think you'll totally freak, but it's clear as day. Bella Swan, I think Carlisle's the one.'
Unable to deny anything her friend had said, even though it hurt to admit it, Bella deflected.
'But he hasn't even tried to call…' Angie waved her hands in protest, accidentally covering them both with a fountain of gummy bears, which naturally they were forced to eat.
'No, no, no Bella. Do not even go there. You were the one that ran out of there like the place was going to explode any second. He is probably just as hurt as you are, maybe even more so. Can't you see that he's giving you time? The ball's in your court, all the decisions are yours to make. And if you don't get over there first thing tomorrow and declare your undying feelings for him then I may just never speak to you again.'
Bella humphed and returned to the programme, a story about a pretty twenty-something who moved away to the city, chasing her dreams, only for them to come crashing back down around her a short while later. It reminded her of her own life, only unlike the woman in the film, she wasn't going to give up and go back home.
'Stupid vampires,' she whispered, low enough that Angie wouldn't be able to hear.
As soon as her friend had left Bella was punching in Carlisle's number, trying not to think too much about the fact that she had already committed it to memory. He answered on the first ring.
'Wait!' She started abruptly, before he even had an opportunity to say hello, 'please don't say anything, not yet. I know if I speak to you I'm going to forget about how angry I am with you right now, and I'm not ready to forgive you just yet. I just want you to know that I haven't given up completely. I need some space to figure this all out and then maybe, just maybe, we could try and work through this. Just a yes or no, that's all I need.' She bit her lower lip in anticipation, her breath hitched and her hands clammy as she waited for his reply.
'Yes, Bella. When it comes to you, it will always be yes.' His voice was music to her ears, a deep melody that she tried to remember perfectly, but she knew her memory would never do it justice.
She quickly slammed the phone back so he wouldn't hear her screaming with joy. After she had finished dancing around her living room, giving her neighbour Jackson the shock of his life, it dawned on her that she had already started to forgive him.
'Why, oh why, can't I just stay mad at you?'
When nobody replied to her contemplative musings, she turned off the television and immediately fell into the most peaceful sleep she had had in weeks.