I am sorry for the lack of story updates, but I shall now rectify this with the best way to fix problems like this: Over-The-Top final battles! YAY!
The Hammer of Doubt!
The conclusion!
Kirby and Parasol looked at Bandana Waddle Dee with an odd look on their faces… Oh yeah, it was deadpan.
"Bandana, please move aside so we can get on with stopping Dedede." Parasol said in an equally deadpan way as he looked.
"Listen, I cannot let this happen, If you want to get to Dedede, you have to go through me first!"
"Alright, let's do this!" The two generic enemy types then proceeded to jump into the air in a cliché fashion, The only words ringing were Kirby's: "Parasol! You have my house keys!"
All was quiet in the robot desert. The desert got this name when the robot rulers decided that now would be a good time for a nervous breakdown which destroyed the robot way of life for most. Some survived, however, and went on to write memoirs about their lives.
Despite his attempts at keeping calm, Parasol was shocked by a giant tank that looked fatter, yet cuter, then him. And it was pointing it's parasol gun at him! He looked on with horror and offense to how big his bottom was.
And now for something completely different!
Kirby entered a dark room and looked for anything in there when a spotlight suddenly lit up. "Welcome to my lair Kirby." Said a voice as another spotlight joined with it's second cousin, twice removed. "now take the hammer and fight me." Kirby and the player sighed. Dedede was making this too easy. Kirby picked up the Hammer… and the lights turned on to reveal a electric cage, some terrified audience members and a penguin in a cape with a playboy symbol on it and a hat, wearing a mask, while holding a metal mallet. He looked very angry.
"Hi Dedede!" Kirby said in a happy tone. "How are you doing?
King Dedede was not impressed. "This time I'll kill you puffball. And I've got the means to do it! Now let's fight hammer to hammer!"
Player: Wait a minute, you're ripping off Meta Knight!
"No I'm not."
Player: Meta Knight throws a sword before you fight him, wears a mask, uses an improved version of the sword and has a special move, just like you.
"Screw you, I'm awesome!"
Meanwhile…
Some robot hobos were lining up at the robot soup kitchen when a non robot ran screaming while a tank robot chased him. The robots looked at the scene.
"What should we do?" said robot 96moo.
"I don't know, throw Chef Kawasaki at im" Said robot 73pie.
Parasol relaxed knowing that Chef Kawasaki would save him.
A few minutes later he ran screaming as a robotic Kawasaki also started chasing him.
Meanwhile… again
"Alright Kirby, just surrender now! I'm invincible! You can't dream of stopping me!"
Player: You do realize your at half health right?
Masked Dedede was about to correct the player when he realized that he/she was right, and decided that it was time to call in "It." He untied everyone and left the arena.
"Maybe he wants to congratulate me for beating him." Then a cup of water that was randomly on stage started rippling. Everyone fled as the rumbles got louder and louder.
"Maybe, he is jumping for joy." Then a giant, robotic hand reached out of the roof toward the stage.
"Maybe he wants to shake hands with me, but thinks I may have a virus on me." the robot then took out its other arm, a drill, and wound up. By this point Kirby has abandoned his hopes and dreams and fled for his life.
Parasol vs. Waddle Tank and Mecha Kawasaki
Parasol had finally found a platform on which to stand on as he looked at the robot ruins, his two adversaries closing in. Finally he felt his demise come in when he received a mysterious package.
"Dear Parasol," said the note he read, "We have decided to help you out to prove we are kind to everyone. However, frankly, we hate you and thus, present unto you the scope shot, the closest thing to a gun in the Nintendo Universe. If you survive, we will send you a complimentary playing card set and won't send an assassin after you."
Best wishes
Sakurai
Parasol sighed, looked to the sky, and screamed "SAKURAI!" Then he faced his robotic adversaries with rage. This was it. The last act. Nothing would stop him from fulfilling his destiny. And nothing will stop us from watching this climatic fight! You hear me? NOTHING!
Kirby Vs King Dedede and HR-D3
Kirby was standing in awe as the Dedede robot from the Kirby Gamecube game showed up. The cockpit opened to show the King in all his Bond villain glory. Seriously he's a cross between a James Bond villain and the King of Town.The fat penguin smiled malevolently at the pink puffball.
"Kirby, It's time for you to surrender and come quietly so you could watch me…" Dramatic close-up of Dedede's hideous face time! "Eat all of the food in Dreamland as I dance a merry dance to mock your hunger and pain!" Kirby looked at the monstrosity with a burning rage and shouted to the heavens
"NEVER YOU FAT PENGUIN GUY THING!"
He then jumped at the machine and-
Parasol Vs Waddle Tank and Robo Kawasaki
Parasol kept firing the scope shot at the two mechs behind him as he ran for his life. Luckily, this was the age of first person shooters, (you still think this is based on the original Kirby Superstar?! Go read all of Spring Breeze again! Go on, I'll wait.)and thus he was able to shoot and run at the same time. At this point Bandana open his hatch at the top of the Tank
"Parasol, please give up. I don't feel okay with leaving the king by himself. After all, since Escargoon is on vacation…" Bandana pleaded
"Come on, I'm sure the King will be fine".
"He's King Dedede, he's going serious and he's fighting Kirby."
"…" Parasol started running for the rapidly exploding castle, past everyone who was watching (but not before stealing Tails/Metal Sonic's rocket and Kenny's Parka (Accidentally killing the poor kid (Pun not intended ( Have I got enough brackets because we should be able to use footnotes)))) while being chased by two rapidly exploding robots.
Kirby Vs King Dedede and HR-D3
King Dedede's robot continued attacking Kirby, while destroying the place because, heck, he was moving out of that castle and even if he wasn't, he was planning to redecorate. The machine cranked and groaned when a freak worm hole opened in the space time continuum. This space time wormhole becomes important… later… much later.
Meanwhile the pink puffball proceeded to pound the food purloiner
Then Parasol came by floating from an orange parachute
"Kirby are you and Dedede okay?!" Parasol asked horrified.
"Yes I'm perfectly fine, how are-
"WHAT?!" Parasol exploded in a fit of rage, got better and started (somehow) strangling Kirby. "You mean I did all that for nothing?! I killed my pen pal and took his clothes because of you!"
"Aw, How sweet." Kirby and Parasol looked to where Dedede's robot had been to discover it was still standing, but just barely. The robot's shell was nothing more then a bunch of frames. It proceeded to roar a wimpy, stoic roar that drove deep into the hearts of all men and women who heard it. Giygas randomly decided to appear in the sky at that point. Link and Mario, who were also in the audience and were considering going up there, gave up.
"Kirby, do something before that crazy fat guy kills us!" Parasol commanded. Kirby checked his cell phone. It had a low battery. He looked to the audience. "um… May I borrow a battery from someone?" Several villains, such as Giovanni, Etna, and Dr. Wily outright refused. Several Heroes, such as Sonic, Megaman and Mario simply shrugged. One Rabbid said "DAAAAHHHHH!" Finally Bowser Koopa spoke up.
"I can give you the best phone in the universe! Behold, The Bowser phone!" Bowser pulled out a cell phone with a similar color scheme to himself. An angelic choir started up as sunlight fell on the phone (Despite the fact that Giygas was blocking the sun from this epic moment) and an announcers voice said something in a very fast voice:
" KoopaKorp is not responsible for stolen stars, coins, emeralds, childrens' card game cards, victories, robot master powers, plot coupons/ Macguffins, Pokemon, and main character status' as a result of calling Bowser. The Bowser Phone is not to be used by Sperm, Ovum, Zygotes, infants, children, teenagers, young adults, medium adults, old adults, old people, very old people, extremely, very old people, dead people, and living/ sentient beings altogether. Ask your doctor if the Bowser phone is for you."
Kirby caught the Bowser phone, took out it's batteries and stored into his pocket. He then combined the batteries with his cell phone. Some text popped up saying : "Congratulations, you have changed the batteries in your cell phone! You can now use to text and call people! You can also call your warpstar, you lucky (BLEEP)"
Kirby dialed a number.
Parasol was shaking with shot nerves.
Kirby waited.
The phone rang.
The receptionist asked Kirby for who he was trying to reach.
The crowd waited anxiously.
Kirby whispered into the phone.
"Hang on sir, I'll put you through"
A taxi arrived at the castle.
More waiting with what seems to be elevator music coming from the phone.
Giygas continued chilling in the sky for no readily apparent reason.
A plot hole from that other Giygas's universe opened, then closed.
Meanwhile a ludicrous hole opened.
Master Hand and Crazy Hand stepped out.
Crazy hand pulled out a red and white ball.
Kirby took the ball.
"Can we speed this up?!" asked M, the Glitch Pokemon. "Some of us have gameboy games to haunt."
"And others have remakes of fan fictions to be ready for." Mewtwo chimed in as Pichu nodded fiercely.
"Okay, okay. Sheesh, you people have no sense of tension." Master Hand complained. Kirby then summoned the pokemon inside. Trillions were shocked. The winds howled with horror. Somebody even tried to put a S.E.P. (Someone else's problem. If you didn't know that, then stop reading this and go read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I'll wait.) field around the Pokemon, only to fail spectacularly.
Several gamers went into an uproar over this. Gabe, Tycho, Aeries and Leo were outright mortified and their jaws stayed down for a good hour. The player proceeded to curse Master Hand, the trolling (BLEEP)rd, to the end of his many, many, many days.
King Dedede laughed. Due to the faulty S.E.P. field the thought he was seeing a Magikarp. To the casual observer, this would normally look to be, in actuality, a shiny Magikarp. But, it is, in fact, a shiny Arceus with a Magikarp paper mask.
One Judgement later…
"All right Kirby, you may have destroyed my robot, killed any chance of me beating you, and ruined my castle, but those efforts were fruitless as I still have my fancy hammer!" Dedede proclaimed, now back in the stadium.
Player: Your Castle is blown to smithereens, your henchman is scarred for life, I could probably cough and you would die, Just throw in the towel already!
King Dedede turned very red at this statement. "You might think so, but I still have my signature move: 'Super Fist of The Mallet: Spinning Penguin!'" The dastardly Penguin or Condor or Whatever started spinning. Everyone was on the edge of their seats now.
How will Kirby and Waddle Dee escape with their lives intact?! Will King Dedede actually kill off our hero?! Find out next-
Kirby lightly tapped King Dedede on the head with the Mallet. He and Bandana Dee flew into the stratosphere.
"LOOKS LIKE TEAM DEDEDE IS BLASTING OFF AGAIN!" The duo said in unison as they twinkled into the sky.
Kirby and Parasol looked at the roof of the castle, which was making a sad face and turning emo. They then turned their attention to the massive amount of food in the room. Then Kirby spoke.
"I'll take care of this Parasol, don't worry. With a little magic, our act of Communism, I mean, community service will come to pass. FOR THE PEOPLE!" Then he ran off.
Cutscene Time!
The little star warrior flew up into the stratosphere and puffed up really big. Really, really, unbelievably big. So big that he spontaneously grew ropes out of nowhere and started to pull the castle off it's perch, much to the delight of everyone below. It also shocked Parasol who was in the middle of thinking about all the worst case scenarios of what Kirby could be planning. And thus, it was a happy ending. At least until the player realized.
Player: Wait… aren't they floating over the ocean?! Wouldn't that mean that the food is being wasted?!
The credits don't appear to believe so as they flash along the bottom of the player's Tv/DS/3DS/PC/Dryer/Whatever in an orderly fashion while doing classical group dances such as the Can-Can.
Kirby then turns back to normal and falls to the ground as Parasol, once again, uses Kenny's parka as a parachute as the castle, hoping to be destroyed at this point, is mercilessly held up by those stars that everyone forgot. The duo then do Kirby's patented "YAYZ" dance as the crowd cheered. (Except Kenny who was too busy being… not alive.)
At least until Kirby ate all the food.
And thus, our heroes fled for their lives into the sunset.
Meanwhile, King Dedede walked along the side of the highway, trying to hitchhike as he does, meanwhile all his waddle dees follow him, doing the same. Arceus watches this from afar.
" Well… whos next on my list of people who must face their truths in heartbreakingly bluntness… Klonoa, definitely." The legendary Pokemon said before leaving through a plot hole. The rest… was known, sadly, as the ending to "Door to Phantomile"
In a room of Hexagons, a figure closes a story book with a slight frown. The figure wore a white suit and had one of his two red eyes covered with what appears to be a bandage. He then turns his way to look at you (the reader) with a false smile. He then grabs another book and opens it. Did someone order one mind screw?
And that ends Spring Breeze, our first story in the Super Star set. With that, we shall take a intermission and you will see two shorts before we continue and as such, until then, it's hiatus time…again…
But don't worry, because Zero will probably guard those books, because on one outsmarts Zero. NO ONE. (Eyes turn red gradually before turning back to normal)
Next time: the World's toughest man contest: Dreamland Edition.