Author's note: Hope you all love hilarity! This chapter is full of it; I hope. I was thinking… Does anyone want a lemony Lemon in the next chapter? It would certainly spice things up. Edward is really jealous. Will he turn to the Dark Side? Suggestions would be really nice. I'm hitting a writer's block.

Disclaimer: I own a lot of things, Twilight isn't one of them.

Chapter 8

Confusion

(Bella pov)

"Rosalie! Can I talk to you? It won't take long." I waved at Rosalie as she passed me to leave the chamber. We had just finished detailing the 'master plan' and everyone wanted some down time. Rosalie glanced over at me, and waved her curious family. Alice, Esme, and Emmett looked longingly at me. I'm sure they wanted to talk to me, but I wasn't ready to face them.

Rosalie sashayed to me. She cast a wary look at Z, but came to my side. I squeezed Z's hand, letting him know I would be okay. He brushed stray hair from my face, and pressed a kiss to my face my hair before walking out of the doors. I peered up at Rosalie's curious face. She lifted on of her perfectly tweezed eyebrows. I blushed and led her out of the chamber. We walked in silence. I waved up at Garrett, who was perched on a window sill five feet off the ground. I heard Felix yelling that the window wasn't there before. I ignored him and continued to my room. I opened the door, stepping aside to let Rosalie pass, and locked the door after shutting it tightly.

I sat on the sofa. I patted the seat beside me, and waited until Rosalie sat down. I twiddled my fingers. "I wanted to say that… I don't hate you, Rosalie." I spoke softly. "I used to think that you hated me because you thought I would reveal your secret to the world. You were afraid that I would betray your brother. I now understand that you just wanted what I had." I looked up at Rosalie's stunned, perfect face. "You have everything that I always wanted. You are stunningly beautiful, you want for nothing, and you have a family that would do anything for you. You have two loving parents and four siblings that accept you for who you are. Can't you see how blessed you are, Rosalie? Yes, your heart will never beat again, but would really give up your family, Emmett, to have your humanity?"

I placed my hands on Rosalie's flat, hard stomach, and closed my eyes. "Would you give up the family that loves and respects your decisions, for a child?" I whispered. "You focus so much on what you don't have that you don't see what's right in front of you." I removed my hand, my abdomen aching. "I would give anything for what you have, Rosalie."

I felt a hand touch my knee. "You're right." I peered into Rosalie's golden eyes. "I do love my family. And I would do anything to protect them. If I had the chance to live the life I was meant to live at the cost of my family, I would probably tell them to shove it and kick their ass tree ways to Sunday." She smiled at the thought. "I lost my chance to have a baby, but I take Emmett over a child any day." She looked down at me. "But you are still human. You can leave now and live your life. You can get married, birth as many children as you want. Don't throw such a gift away, Bella."

"I would give it up if it meant spending an eternity with the one I love." I smiled.

Rosalie's topaz orbs turned playful. "I notice the absence of a certain vampire's name in that declaration." She smirked, "You and Azazel seemed pretty damn close today. Is something going on that I should know about? Are you two doing the bedroom tango? Does he have your V-card?"

My face flared a bright crimson. "Wh… wha….. NO! What makes you think that?!"

She placed a manicured finger on her chin, looking towards the ceiling. "I don't know. It could be your perpetual re face, or his tongue on your face."

My blush darkened. "No way! I'm probably not his type anyway. I'm much too naïve and plain."

"Really, now?" She grinned suggestively at me. "He seemed to want that tongue of his on another anatomy part that your face!"

I was afraid my face would catch fire. "Rosalie!"

She cackled, "I can see it now. Your face would be so red while he…"

"ROSALIE!" I screeched in embarrassment.

She giggled into her hand. "Alright, alright. I'll stop. But really, Bella, you don't see yourself clearly. A lot of single vampires have been checking you out. The only reason they haven't approached you is because Azazel has been growling at them and baring his teeth." Rosalie patted my hand twice before getting up and sashaying to the door. She unlocked the door and pried it open. She turned to me. "You're a beautiful woman, Bella. You're just too busy comparing yourself to others." With that, she walked out the door, shutting the door behind her. I touched my face. I didn't believe her. Everyone says I am pretty, but my eyes are too dull, my hair too brown, to be anywhere close to pretty. If my eyes had been green or gray, then at least something about my appearance would be interesting.

All of a sudden, I was pinned to the couch by a heavy body. I lifted my arms, but a pair of large, strong hands encircled my wrists. My hands were restrained above my head by one of the hands while the other pushed my hip into the cushion. A warm, wet tongue touched my neck and trailed up to my temple. I cried out as my face grew hotter than it has ever been before. Z lifted his body, hovering over me. He was chuckling like surprising the living hell out of me was fun. Well, it probably was for him, but it definitely wasn't for me. "I didn't say anything?!" I shrieked.

Z raised one of his eyebrows. "I could hear you thinking." He smirked. He bent down and licked the other side, mirroring what he did on my left side. "And that's for you said in your conversation with Rosalie." He flicked out his tongue and licked the tip of my nose. He hovered over me, staring at my face. My face was burning as his eyes smoldered into mine. His eyes seemed to glow with an otherworldly light. I could feel him moving closer, lowering his face. I could feel his hot breath on my parted my lips. Before our lips touched, a loud thud sounded behind the couch. Z jumped up and lifted a black and silver sword. He leapt over the sofa's back. I heard a smacking sound and booming laughter.

Drake shimmered into the seat across from me. He had a slight smirk on his face as he waved at me. I waved back at him, wondered my face hasn't caught fire. Z stood up, pulling a large body with him. Cerberus and Z grasped each other's forearms, just under their elbows, and Cerberus clapped Z on his shoulder. Z smiled and pulled Cerberus into a man-hug. They let go after a short second.

"It's good to see you." Z laughed. "How was the scouting?"

Cerberus bellowed a laugh. "Boring as shit! Draven can't do much inside that prison of his. Now tell me what's been happening on the Surface. How's the female?"

"The female is over here." I mumbled. Cerberus' head turned towards me. His face stretched into a smile that could rival Emmett's grin of joy. He picked me up and swung me around. I couldn't help but laugh as the room spun. Cerberus put me down when he was sure I was good and dizzy. The floor rushed to greet my face, but I was stopped by a pair of strong arms. I could see two Z's twirled in my vision as I giggled uncontrollably. I smiled at the incredibly gorgeous demon above me.

"Oh, how I missed you, little Bella! You wouldn't believe how dull it's been since you're absence from my life. Even Drake's been a bigger downer than normal!" Cerberus pulled me from Z's embrace and held me against his large chest. "You must promise to never leave us, little Bella! You must stay with us forever, and ever, and ever!" I wrapped my arms around his neck and squeezed. I really wanted to be back in Z's arms, but I couldn't get out of Cerberus' hold. Cerberus jerked, letting out a surprised yelp, and I fell into Z's waiting arms.

"Cerberus, if you could hold back your enthusiasm, I would be most grateful." He flexed his arms before letting me slide down his bare chest. "She is human, after all."

Cerberus pouted and nodded. He hung his head and fell on to the couch Drake was sitting on. When Cerberus fell on the opposite end of the couch, the end Drake sat on tilted upwards, throwing Drake up and through the ceiling. I giggled at the sight of a pair of black jean covered legs kicking madly, hanging from the ceiling. Z covered his mouth, trying hard not to laugh. Cerberus looked up from his spot on the sofa, glancing around. "Is there a draft in here?"

Drake slipped out of the giant hole in the ceiling. He fell, face down, towards the floor behind the couch. I registered a look of oncoming pain on his face before he vanished behind the cream colored sofa. I heard a muffled groan of pain, and that's what broke the dam for Z. He bent over form the force of his laughter. Cerberus looked at Z with confusion before peering around the room. Drake climbed over the sofa's back and fell on the cushion. He winced when his chest landed on the plush fabric. Cerberus looked over at Drake. "What happened to you?"

Z's laughter got worse after Cerberus opened his mouth. I listened with rapt attention to Z's tinkling laugh. His laugh was beautiful. I could listen to it for hours and never get bored. I vowed to myself that I would find more ways to make Z laugh. Z gained control of laughter much sooner than I wanted. Z straightened, sending me a wink before facing our company.

"I'm sorry." Z grinned. "Bella thought something funny."

Cerberus looked over at me. "You must be a damn comedian. It takes a lot to make the ice prince laugh." Cerberus grinned at Z's glare.

"Yes, well, I called you both for a reason." Z sated smoothly. "I have decided that both of you shall watch over and guard Bella while I lead an army to the gates of Draven's domain."

"Just us two?" Cerberus gestured to himself and Drake.

Z nodded, ignoring Drake's smirk. "Affirmative. I believe that less is more in this case. If I had an entire battalion watching Bella, the large group would be like a neon sigh pointing at Bella. There will be a decoy out in the forest southwest form here. Bella will remain here in the castle. Can you I trust both of you to guard Bella and protect her with your life?"

Cerberus winked at me before giving us a thumb up. "You can count on me!"

"And me as well." Drake placed his right fist over his heart, the smirk still on his face.

Z nodded. "Very well, I entrust the safety of Bella in your capable hands. Why don't you go mingle with the parasites, for you will be teaching them how to fight demons and win."

Both demons leaped onto their feet and left the room. Before shutting the door, Cerberus winked and grinned suggestively at us. I blush a light pink as the door clicked shut. Z stared at the door as if Draven would knock it down. He didn't look at me as he sent me a mental message.

I don't like this.

It must be done. I reached out and gripped his hand. I know it's dangerous, but it will be Draven's downfall.

I know. Your plan is faultless, albeit risky. I just hope that Draven doesn't see through it.

I trust you to be here on time.

He gave my hand a light squeeze. Always.

And there is always the failsafe, but I don't believe it will come to that.

You have so much faith in me.

I pressed against his back, nuzzling the spot between his shoulder blades. I nothing but faith in you, Z. I trust you with my life.

He pulled me to his front and wrapped his arms around me. Your life won't be endangered. I don't care if I must face all of Hell. While there is still breath in my body, I will protect you.

(Jane pov)

I walked the corridors of the castle. I could hear vampires moving around in the rooms around me. Felix was checking the walls, noting the placement of the windows. Demetri and Heidi were discussing their 'secret' relationship problems. My brother was flipping through channels on the television. He mumbled that humans would watch anything and I had to agree. A show about a pregnant teenager and a show about people faking their identities on the internet is absolutely ridiculous. When I was human, females were married and birthed children as young as twelve. I enjoyed how much power women gained in the recent years, but I despised how some human teenagers would purposefully impregnate themselves to be famous. It sickened me, but mostly I felt bad for the children.

A mother's reason for having children should never be for fame.

A Cullen, I believe her name is Rosalie, was currently walking towards me. In my opinion, this vampire was much more appealing than Heidi. Where Heidi flaunted her beauty and used it to get what she wanted, Rosalie preferred to work for what she desired. I heard that Rosalie enjoyed spending her time with cars. The thought of cars reminded me of the Aston Martin that made weird noises when started. Felix bought the car and tried upgrading it, but it seems that he ended up making it worse. I considered asking Rosalie to look at his car. It would crush Felix's ego, but I wanted to be on Rosalie's good side. It doesn't hurt having allies.

"Rosalie? That is your name, right?"

She stopped and sneered, "Yeah, and what do you want?"

"I have heard you are quite the expert when it comes to vehicles." I smiled, "Felix has recently bought an Aston Martin and has broken it in his attempts to upgrade."

Her eyes brightened at the mention of an Aston Martin. "I would love to have a look at the car!"

I nodded and started walking down the hall. I heard another set of footsteps join us. I turned and saw her mate walking beside her. He had his ever-present smile on his face and his arm slung around Rosalie's shoulders. I searched my memory and remembered he was called Emmett. His size rivaled Felix. There were whispers that his talent was strength. Many wanted to see Felix and Emmett battle each other. I considered telling him of this ongoing bet, but I decided against it.

We entered the garage and I was shocked to see two men I had never seen before standing in the dark, under-ground parking lot. One was much larger than Emmett and had crimson hair and bright orange eyes. The second man was much shorter and leaner than his companion. His hair and eyes were pitch black. They were tense, as if they were in the middle of an argument. Both looked over at us when we entered the garage. I stood frozen for a second before sending my gift upon the biggest one.

The guy stilled and started laughing. His bellowing laughs echoed in the vast room. I stopped and stumbled back. No one had ever reacted to my gift that way! They fell to their knees, either screaming or begging for it to end. Unless they are a masochist, no one would laugh at the agony I inflict. And I have done that before. They didn't like it much.

His laughing died down. "Oh man, that tickled like a son of a bitch!"

I felt my eye twitch. "It wasn't supposed to, dumbass."

"Demons don't feel pain the way you vamps do, kid." He chuckled.

My eye twitched again. "I'm not a kid!"

The demon's smaller companion looked between us. His disconcerting gaze settled on me. "You inflict internal pain don't you?" He sighed. "Cerberus gains strength through pain. Your gift is worthless."

"Well, against me, it is." Cerberus puffed out his chest in pride. Nothing would have made me happier than to beat his head into the concrete. Emmett walked past me and held his hand out to Cerberus. Emmett shot him a grin, flexing his muscles.

"I'm Emmett! And that babe over there is my wife, Rosalie!" Cerberus beamed back at Emmett and grabbed his hand.

"She is quite the looker!"

"Cerberus?" Rosalie stepped up to stand beside me. "As in the guardian of Hell's Gates?"

Said demon nodded enthusiastically. "That's me!" He pointed to his companion. "And this is my boing ass partner in crime, Drake."

Emmett and Rosalie froze. I recalled the war meeting. Drake was the son of Draven, a demon that planned to impregnate the human, Bella. The child shall supposedly bring about the Apocalypse. Azazel figured that Drake was one of many moles within the domains of Hell. I know Azazel and Bella had a plan to trap Drake and remove all the information they could about Draven's future plans.

"How's it going?" Drake waved. Emmett grinned at him, but his smile looked forced. Rosalie scoffed and examined the room. Her eyes lit up like fireworks when she spotted the electric blue Aston Martin. She rushed over to the sleek car and reached out to stroke the gleaming metal. She caressed the hood before making her way to the door. She carefully opened the door and sat in the driver's seat. When her backside made contact with the tan leather, she let out a breathy moan. She ran her fingers over the steering wheel. She found the keys in the cars visor and started the car. When the engine roared to life, it made a strange groaning life. Rosalie cried and turned off the engine. She jumped out of the car and popped the hood. She made a soft keening sound as she peered at the large chunk of metal.

"Oh, baby… What has he done to you?" She moaned. She gestured to Emmett and he ran off, returning moments later with a tool kit. He placed it beside Rosalie and she began working on the engine. Felix and many other members of the Volturi guard came to investigate the loud roaring of the engine. Felix made a move to stop Rosalie, but her hard glare pinned him to the ground. She went back to tweaking the engine while her mate leaned against the SUV parked beside the Aston Martin. "Don't worry, baby. I will make it better." She whispered softly.

Cerberus leaned over to Emmett. "Does she always get like this when she's fixing a car?"

"An Aston Martin is not a car!" snapped Rosalie from her position under the hood.

Emmett patted Cerberus' shoulder. "Best to leave her be, dude."

The demon nodded and turned to an empty space. "Hey, where's Drake?"

(Drake pov)

I let the raven free, trusting it to carry my message to father. I watched as the black bird flew higher and higher. Today's events swirled through my head. I winced in pain as I recalled the sofa incident. I rubbed my head. The bump throbbed in pain as I remembered how it felt to break through the stone and wood of the ceiling.

I went over the plan to distract my mind from the pain. I knew what I was supposed to do and how to separate Bella from Azazel. I thought the vampires would be a problem, but I almost cried with relief when Azazel said it would just be me and Cerberus guarding Bella. My plan wouldn't work if I had to worry about Cerberus and a bunch of parasites. I deducted that getting around Cerberus would be hard enough. Throwing sensitive and gifted vampires in the mix would make the mission impossible.

I shook my head. The plan will work. I had thought it through so many times, editing and revising, considering all problems that could occur, for the plan to fail.

I just hoped that no one would suspect anything.

That's chapter 8, peoples! What do you think Drake is planning? Sorry if it took a while. My shoulder hurts like someone is stabbing it repeatedly with a white hot giant ass knife! Has anyone checked out my second story? I'm working on chapter three now! So go take a look. Right now. At this moment. Like right now.

What are doing? Stop reading this silly memo and go read it!

Stop!

Stop it!

Go check it out or I swear I won't post until next week!

Well, that's a lie. I love posting.

Love all of you for staying with me.

-SPN :3