A/N Thank you for all who have reviewed and read the story. I hope you are enjoying it. Many surprises to come, the first is not too far away.

Again, I own nothing,

CH 6 Duke

Lorelai took Saturday off and prepared herself for her date with Luke that evening. She'd bought a new blouse a couple of weeks ago on the chance she might find a date sometime in the next two years. It was really inappropriate for work, but perfect for seducing your boyfriend, she grinned wickedly. A teal blue halter with a plunging neckline and her favorite pair of jeans was just the thing to get Mr. Responsible off his feet and into bed.

In the morning she washed and conditioned her hair. While the conditioner was penetrating her hair, dirty! she painted her toenails and used a refreshing toner mask on her face. She went upstairs to shower and wash out the conditioner and as she stepped out of the shower she heard Rory on the phone.

"Oh, yes Luke, mom's in the bathroom so I could let her know you called and she can..." Lorelai ripped the phone out of her daughter's hand and gave her a death stare.

"Hey Luke, I was just washing my hair. I was going to stop by later to find out what time you're expecting me?" Lorelai stuck her tongue out at Rory.

"Well, that's why I was calling, I wondered if six would be good for you, I'm going to have to open tomorrow," Luke said.

"Yeah that'd be great, six it is. I'll bring the movie and you bring the food!"

"Great, see you tonight."

Rory had been taking this all in and she looked at her mom and said, "Like watching a lamb being led to the slaughter. Does he have a clue as to what's happening tonight?"

"What's happening tonight dear daughter, is dinner and a movie, nothing else. I refuse to affirm anything else until you're twenty-one." Lorelai grinned wildly.

"Fine, but I still say something happened after I left yesterday and you'll not convince me any different." With that she went back downstairs to continue studying.

At five-fifteen Lorelai put on her jeans and halter top. The top was bare back all the way past the jeans waistband and when she looked at herself in the mirror you couldn't tell she was wearing anything because her hair covered the neck. She giggled and seriously considered not wearing her blazer through town, but the late September nights were getting colder so she put her navy blazer on and headed down the stairs.

Rory looked up and saw a completely ready Lorelai coming down the stairs. Then she looked at the clock and it read five-thirty. "Mom?"

"Yes?"

"You do know that it's a good half an hour before you're supposed to show up at Luke's which takes five minutes to get to, ten if you do baby steps?"

"Yes," Lorelai sighed. "I'm just anxious to see him, how pathetic is that? I can't even pretend that I'm looking for a movie to take because you know I'm taking When Harry Met Sally."

"Mom, it isn't pathetic, I think it is kinda cute. I was really worried that you were going to bolt on him and here you are 'all ready to make a commitment' girl. I'm proud of you."

"Well, I know it's scary, but I just keep thinking about what it'd be like if he wasn't in my life and then I stand still."

"Good for you! Now you have wasted just enough time that you'll be a bit early but not looking like you're a desperate spinster."

"Gee, thanks mom! If I end up being a little later than I thought I'll call, OK?"

"OK, have fun!"

Lorelai got to the diner and was grateful that all of the regulars hadn't gotten there yet or had gone home. She scurried behind the curtain and darted up the stairs. She smiled before she knocked on the door.

Luke opened the door wearing a good pair of jeans, much more fitted than his diner jeans and a navy sweater that brought out his eyes and showed off his muscles. Lorelai was wondering if she could get through dinner before she jumped him when she leaned in and captured his lips with her own.

Luke was ready for this kiss and didn't let her deepen it like yesterday morning.

"Now, we have dinner to enjoy first. I'm very happy to see you though." He gave her another small peck on her lips.

Lorelai noticed the smell of the food for the first time. "Something smells crazy good!"

Luke led her over to the stove. "Well, we are having mixed green salad with mandarin oranges, dried cranberries and chopped walnuts with a raspberry vinaigrette; lamb chops with mint pear chutney, escalloped potatoes with extra cheese for you, corn soufflé, and homemade yeast rolls with real butter."

"For dessert we're having a triple chocolate brownie warm out of the oven with homemade vanilla ice cream that I whipped up today and of course extra whipped cream, a cherry and my coffee." He was very pleased with himself and loved watching her expression until it looked like her face wouldn't be able to contain her grin.

Then she took her jacket off and turned to put it on the sofa. Luke thought his head was going to explode. There in front of him was Lorelai's entire back without a stitch between him and her skin.

"I forgot your favorite mug!" Luke ran out the door and down the stairs to the diner just to put some distance between himself and Lorelai.

He was in no condition to walk into the diner so he calmed himself before stepping out from behind the counter to get the blue mug that screamed Lorelai whenever he saw it. Everyone knew not to use it for another customer; it was saved for her ever since he had picked it up at the market because it matched her eyes.

He was able to get through dinner and dessert without losing control of himself even though it was getting more difficult by the second, but he knew if he gave in it wouldn't be a good idea, he had to remain strong.

They were sitting on the sofa watching the movie Lorelai brought with her and he kept his arm on the top of the couch while Lorelai draped herself across his chest. At one point Lorelai called his name and he looked into her eyes at the same time she kissed him.

Out of instinct he brought his arm around to hold her and his hand came in contact with her soft warm flesh. God she felt good, his hand started to travel over her back as the kisses intensified. Her kisses were hungry, demanding and the most passionate thing he could remember experiencing. His fingers grazed the side of her breast and Lorelai moaned in his mouth at the same time her hand cupped him outside his jeans.

"Luke, make love to me, please, I don't want to wait anymore. God I want you." Lorelai pleaded with Luke as she continued to deepen the kiss.

Praise God his sense came back to him at that moment and he lifted Lorelai up and set her on the other side of the couch as he crossed to the far side of the room trying to get a grip on what he had almost done. He was acting like a hormonal teenager; actually he hadn't been this bad when he was a hormonal teenager!

It took Lorelai a second to realize what had happened, not the kissing stuff, that had been going very well, the little top had done her job, but why did Luke put her at the other end of the couch like she was in a timeout?

"Luke? Is everything OK? I thought everything was going very well and then you stopped, did I upset you?"

"No, Lorelai, I'm very sorry, I told you we would wait and now, well you were in the mix I don't think I have to tell you what almost happened."

"Why do you sound like you're upset about this? I know what was about to happen and I'm fine with it, looking forward to it even. If you're worried about me being ready I think you should have figured out by now that begging you to make love to me is a good indication that I'm ready."

Lorelai was desperately trying to bring in some humor to cover the fact she was feeling humiliated, she never thought she'd have to beg a man to have sex, especially Luke and then be turned down!

"Lorelai, it just is too soon," Luke said. "I told you we'd wait and I don't want the heat of the moment to ruin our relationship. I do want you, it just is too soon. OK?"

"Luke you keep saying it's too soon and I have no idea what that means. I'm pretty sure that it isn't too soon to know that I want to feel your skin next to mine, to know what excites you, to please you and have you please me."

"Lorelai, it isn't that simple! Things will happen that you have no idea about! Sex isn't just an exercise routine! There are side affects that you've no control over and I just don't think you're fully aware of the potential pitfalls that are in that simple act!" Luke was really building up a head of steam towards a full blown rant.

"Luke I know I've only had one serious relationship before and it never had the intensity that this one does so it's a little scary for me to go into uncharted waters, I mean who knows what might happen right?" She was watching Luke as she was talking and when she said this he reacted a bit and then a light turned on for Lorelai,

"Oh. My. God. Who was she?!" Lorelai demanded. "I have a freaking right to know!"

Luke's head snapped up. "What're you talking about?"

"I've never had a relationship with this intensity before and so I may be a little scared about what could happen, but you have had one haven't you? That's where this little charade has developed out of, you were burnt and now you're scared. I have a right to know who the hell is responsible for this since you just rolled over my foot with her emotional baggage!"

Lorelai was now convinced that this woman was responsible for the sexual frustration she was feeling and she was not a happy camper.

"For God's sake Lorelai, just because I want to enter into a grown-up relationship with a woman does not mean I'm harboring some emotional wounds from a previous relationship! Maybe you can't keep your emotions in check but that doesn't mean that the rest of us are still sixteen!"

Luke knew he went too far, but she had hit too close to home and he didn't want to talk about the reason to himself so how could he tell her. He waited to see how bad the fallout was going to be and it turned ugly quick.

Lorelai pulled herself off the couch and put on her navy blazer. She picked up her purse and Luke was afraid she was going to go without saying a word, at the same time he was afraid of what she would say. She didn't disappoint.

"Well, Duke, since it's getting late for a sixteen year old to be out, I'll be going. I think it's best that you and I stop pretending that this is anything more than an experiment gone bad. You go back to being the diner guy who hides his great body under baggy jeans and flannel shirts that are two sizes too big, and I'll eventually come back in for coffee. See, no harm no foul.' Lorelai reached for the door and got it open before she heard Luke's voice.

"Rachel," he said, barely able to contain the emotion in his voice. "Her name was Rachel."

Lorelai froze when she heard the name, her worst fears confirmed. She closed the door and turned to look at Luke. He was so small and defeated in the corner and she wanted to comfort him, but he needed to get this out and if she gave in too soon, he wouldn't.

"I'm still here," she said as she stood in the door.

Luke got up from his chair and walked to the refrigerator. He looked as though he had aged twenty years in just thirty seconds. He took two beers out and offered one to Lorelai. He set it on the table and sat at one of the chairs, she sat in the other.

"Rachel was the first woman I ever loved. She was a photographer who I was living with. We were together for almost four years total and it ended badly. She wanted more excitement and adventure, always looking on the other side of the fence."

"Well, you know me, I like my life; I like knowing where I am and having a good indication of what the day will bring. For Rachel that was like water torture. So one day I woke up and found a note telling me she just couldn't stay. She had disappeared before, going off for a few months at a time and then coming back, but this time she had been here for a little over six months and I let myself believe that she was serious about making a life with me here. I had opened myself up and planned for the future; then the other shoe dropped."

"Right away I knew this wasn't like the other times. I knew Rachel wouldn't be back and I understood for the first time why people develop addictions or choose suicide. The pain of my mother and father's death wasn't a third as bad as this. I physically ached from the time I got up until I went to bed. I actually went to the doctor because I thought I was having a heart attack."

Luke was on autopilot now, the story unfolding without him being aware of what he was saying. He rubbed the palms of his hands over his eyes and then ran his hands through his hair. Finally he stared off into space as he continued.

"I tried alcohol to dull the pain but it didn't even begin to touch it. I left town for a week because I didn't want to see the pity on the faces of the townspeople, but the problem with being alone is there isn't anything to distract you from the pain so it becomes your constant buddy. It came home with me when I returned. When I got up in the morning there it was, it went through my day with me, taking orders, cooking burgers, filling drinks, all the time walking right beside me. When I went to bed it was the worst, dreams of my future played in my head, I would be an old man, with no kids, no wife, no friends. Alone up here, and the only way they would know I died was when I didn't open the diner one day."

Lorelai's heart was breaking for this man who's so good to everyone; no one should experience this pain, but especially not him, she reached out to touch his hand.

Luke seemed to notice Lorelai for the first time since he started his rant, "Then one day this wild eyed woman came bursting into my diner in search of coffee and she turned on a light inside my life. It took me five years to get up the nerve to kiss her and I have to be honest Lorelai, I didn't plan ahead for what was going to happen after I kissed you. I wasn't ready for the intensity of having you return my affection. The feelings I had for Rachel at the height of our relationship are even now overshadowed by the feelings I have for you and we haven't done much more than kiss."

"I'm afraid that I'll cease to exist from the pain that I'll feel if this relationship doesn't work out. If we become even more involved I'm so afraid that the pain of ending will be unbearable." Luke had grasped Lorelai's hand and he was pleading with her as he looked into her eyes.

Lorelai put her other hand over Luke's. "Right now I want to comfort you and tell you that I'll never leave you, because that's what my heart is saying. But I've never lied to Rory and I think it's important that I have that relationship with you as well. As you well know, I've done my traveling and I created a new life for Rory and myself almost fifteen years ago."

"If I search my yearning self there is no secret desire to travel to far away places for long amounts of time. Rory and I've talked about backpacking through Europe when she graduates high school, but that's more for Rory. I'd be happy to have her camped out on my couch watching movies all summer."

"I know that my home's here, in Stars Hollow. I found out who I was here, I grew up here, even if some people still mistake me for a sixteen year old in a thirty-something's body." She pointedly looked at Luke who had the good grace to drop his head.

"The thing is Luke; I don't want to miss out on something that may be the best thing either of us will ever experience. I can honestly say that I've never felt this way about another man. The closest I've gotten is the unconditional love I have for Rory, but that's filled with responsibility as well, I feel like I want to protect her from pain. With you, if I were to protect you from pain I'd leave and never come through your door again, but I'm too selfish. I want to have you in my life even if that means that someday I constantly miss you; this is too good. So I guess I'm asking you, because I got burnt once tonight pleading, are you willing to risk everything to see if this is as good as I feel it will be?" Lorelai looked up at him with a hopeful smile.

Luke stood up still holding onto her hands and pulled her to him in a tight embrace. "At least I don't feel like I'm on that branch by myself, eh?" He smiled down at her.

"Lorelai, can we at least let me meet your parents and get through one Friday night dinner? I'd prefer your mind-reading mother to know I hadn't recently ravaged her daughter, at least not at the first dinner, OK? Then we can go out on Saturday to someplace nice and as the evening progresses we can let nature take her course, hmm?"

Lorelai, smiled up at him and said, "I might even be able to convince Rory to spend the night at Lane's Saturday so we grown-ups would have all the time in the world to explore." She smiled wickedly.

"That sounds wonderful, in fact what say we take a small overnight to a nearby Inn where you can check out the competition and we can have a peaceful evening away from prying eyes?" Luke leaned in and kissed her with the promise of things to come.

"I'll make sure that Rory is properly supervised and I'll pack a bag. It may be the least I've ever brought on an overnight." Lorelai said with an evil grin. "Do you want to continue watching the movie?" Lorelai just wanted to cuddle now that they had seemed to make up, plus she wanted to comfort Luke.

"That sounds good, but please keep your blazer on, I only have so much resolve and I really want to meet your parents without the image of you naked in the forefront of my mind."

Lorelai laughed and settled back with Luke. Damn Rachel's eyes! What a horrid thing to do to her sweet Luke. Wait! He said that Rachel had been the first girl that he loved, since she was the second girl he dated, the high school one must not of been more than puppy love, like Christopher for her.

"Luke?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you love Anna?"

Luke sighed, "No, I have to own up to this one, Anna came into the diner about six months after Rachel left and she started to hang out, asked me out to dinner, really pursued me. God I sound like such a cad, she was comforting, no threat, she liked me and I was lonely. I let it go on for way too long because there just wasn't the feeling there. Well, now you know the chink in my armor."

"I understand the need for wanting human warmth and companionship. I think I went out with so many guys, even though it was just once, because it was nice to know that I was still attractive to someone. There was a period in my life where I actually went out with guys just to help feed Rory. That is a chink in my armor, so see, neither of us is perfect apart, but maybe we'll be perfect for each other." Luke leaned over and gently kissed her.

Lorelai smiled at him all the time thinking in her head, so if Rachel is the FIRST girl he loved, and he didn't love the other two, could he mean he loved me?

Lorelai sat back against Luke, her head filled with so many thoughts. She sorted through them like a bucket of marbles. She picked up one idea and examined it only to put it away to pick up another and look at it.