Chapter Eighteen: Memories

"I don't deserve to be loved."

-Katherine Pierce

Katherine stared at her reflection in the mirror, she looked so different. She had taken off her green eye contacts and now her eyes were back to chocolate brown. The blond at the tip of her hair was starting to fade and Katherine couldn't wait until she could dye it brown again.

"Siren-Siren?"

Katherine jumped back at the realization that Bruce was talking to her and Bucky. "Yes?"

"I was asking you and Bucky if you remember anything." Bruce asked sounding hopeful. "Your previous name? Where you lived? Your friends, maybe?"

They shook their head. "Nothing."

"Do you know where the HYDRA base is?"

"We don't have an exact location, we didn't know exactly where the HYDRA base is, but we know is in Russia." Katherine said earnestly. "We spoke Russian . . . there were a lot of mountains, that's all I can remember."

Bruce sighed. "Well as you know HYDRA modified your memories so that they could use you-"

"But you have a way to get them back right?" Katherine asked sharply, interrupted him. "I don't want to be anyone's puppet for a second longer and if I have to rip open the head of Charles and the rest of his lunatic team, I will."

"Calm down." Bruce said. "We have a way, it's a prototype, but we're confident that it will work, but it's going to be painful."

Bucky nodded. "We can take it, we don't want to live any more lies."

"I told you to take care of them, not become their friend." Fury snapped as he glared at Tony who was happily sipping whisky from a flask that he had hidden in several hiding places. "You do realize that we now have two HYDRA spies on board. Spies that are dangerous, your task was to kill them."

"So we have Banner, what are you worried about?"

Fury glared at him, apparently the situation was far from funny for him. "They are dangerous, Stark!"

"Look, I could care less about that but the Winter Soldier is apparently Rogers' buddy and Siren unfortunately tags along, so we're not killing them." Tony sighed exasperated. "Be smart, Fury they are the only ones that are going to leads us back to HYDRA so that we can destroy them once and for all. Besides they've been brainwashed, they don't know how to do anything besides kill."

Fury stared at him suspiciously. "How do you know?"

"I don't know really but Natasha and Clint are pretty confident and with Loki and the Red Room under their belt, I doubt they are going to be lying. We need to find a way to restore their memories, I'm assuming that SHIELD has some device."

Fury stared at him wearily. "They do."

The metal table was cold, Bruce had led them to one of the labs at the helicarrier as an armful of attendants walked around them. Katherine and Bucky were strapped down to mental tables and everyone around them was connecting different wires, Katherine turned her head slightly and saw that Bucky was stiff across the table. He looked even more scared that she was.

"Hey," she said. "It's going to be ok, I won't let them hurt you."

"I won't let them hurt you either." He said.

"Are you guys ready?" Bruce asked. They nodded. "Commencing, in one, two, and three."

They felt as if a bolt of lightning had just hit them, their arms stiffen and even their brains seems to flinch. Everything seemed to be spinning as each of their memories came floating back to them.

"Sergeant James Barnes."

"I with you until the end of the line, pal."

"This isn't a back alley Steve, its war!"

"Remember when I made you ride the Cyclops on Coney Island is this payback?"

"Let me hold her, at least once!"

"Katerina, is from Bulgaria."

"Better you die than I!"

"The brother who loved me too much and the one who didn't love me enough."

"Humanity is a vampire's greatness weakness."

"I have nothing but I'm about to change that!"

"Have a nice human life, Katherine."

Katherine felt the tears crowing her eyes when Bruce shook her awake. "Siren, Siren did it work?"

"It worked." Katherine said in a hollow voice. "And my name is not Siren."

He had killed all those people. Bucky stared at his metal arm and closed it. He was alone in his room and the room was quiet, at least Bruce and the others were nice enough to leave them alone. He had killed all of those innocent people for HYDRA without the blink of an eye, he was a killer. A murderer. An abomination.

He had hurt his best friend, who didn't even try to fight him, he almost killed Katherine his only companion. He was disgusted with himself.

Bucky's fist connected with the bathroom mirror, shattering it. He was better off dead.

Warm water was running down Katherine's shoulders but she was freezing. How long had she been standing under the water, ten, fifteen minutes she honestly didn't remembered. All she remembered was her horrible life, how she had stupidly been captured and turned into HYDRA'S weapon, how she didn't even fight back. She wasn't a survivor, she was pathetic.

The screams of all her victims rang in her ears. The number of victims didn't worry her, she had killed before but she had actually killed children. Little two, and three, and seven year old children who couldn't defend themselves.

Even since she had lost her baby in 1490 she swore that she would never hurt a child and she had never broken that promise to the baby that she never held, until now. She looked down and her eyes seemed to fool her for a second. Her hair, her body, the shower walls were covered with blood, her victim's blood, the blood of two of the babies that she had lost.

Katherine turned off the shower and quickly exit it, but her heartbeat didn't seem to lower. Gripping her hair she did something that Katherine pried herself for not doing: she cried.

-End of Chapter Eighteen-