AN: Alright it's been a slow Newsweek... Meaning I still only have 10.5 Chapters actually written. Which is fine, it doesn't hinder me from posting Chapter 6, it just means I need to get a move on! Anyway thanks again for all the reviews etc. I apologize for the sadness, but it's good to know it's been executed well! Haha! Anyway it's Saturday so here is Chapter 6! Read, review, and enjoy! :)
PS. The italicized part in this Chapter is the video.
Disclaimer: I don't own Austin & Ally, but you know that by now:P Oh and also there's some higher grade swears here, just a warning!
Parties & Mistakes
Chapter 6: Ally's POV
I woke up startled. I had no idea where I was, but I knew I'd just been awakened by some loud musical noise. A horn of some sort? I sat up from my spot on the floor and noted that everything hurt. I guess that would happen when you sleep on the floor. That's two excellent nights of sleep for me in a row. Ugh, the music room, yeah I remember that now. Essentially having an emotional breakdown, yeah I definitely remember that.
I stood up, my bones aching from a hard night on the ground. I stretched out, unkinking my back and every other bone in my body. I felt as shitty as I had getting up yesterday, probably looked that bad too. I glanced at myself in the wall mirror. Lovely. My makeup had streaked down my face from the tears, and my hair looked wonderful from the fitful sleep. This was not Ally Dawson. This was someone else. Someone much less put together, someone who would let things like this happen. I knew it like I knew yesterday, this wasn't me.
And I hated that fact. Hated myself for letting any of this happen. I took a deep breath and walked into the store's bathroom. I grabbed a few squares of toilet paper and wet them, dabbing at the black mascara that had stained my face. Even with it coming off easily, I still looked like a shell of myself. This girl who I barely recognized. I hated Austin and I hated Kira and I hated myself. My legs moved on their own accord, sitting on top of the closed toilet. I ran my hands through my messy hair before settling them against my face. My pose screamed defeat. Honestly, that's all I felt and it was a devastatingly horrible feeling.
I heard my phone go off in the other room and decided maybe I should go check it out. My aching body begrudgingly moved into the song room where I noticed my song book still open to that page. My musings on Austin moving back into my mind. Okay, shove it away Ally, you can do this.
I picked up my phone, wondering if this was the first text or one of many. As I had figured they were from Trish, nothing yet on the Austin front.
Hey where r u? I need to talk:D 10:25am
I went to ur house ur mom says u fell asleep in the song room? 10:47am
K I'm coming over! Be ready! 10:52am
That was the most recent one. I sent a quick 'ok' and noted the smiley face in the first text. Something told me that that only meant news about Austin. I honestly wasn't up to anything of that sort. But at the same time as not wanting to hear anything about Austin, I still really wanted to hear from him. I knew that we both couldn't pretend like nothing had happened, and if we did we'd still need to talk about everything. Neither of us wanted to step up though, this I knew for a fact.
I walked around the music room, straightening pillows, making it look like I hadn't just had a mental breakdown, the usual. And then I laid my eyes on the song book. That damn page I had somehow thought was a good idea to write on. I slammed it shut, putting it back where it belonged on top of the piano. That was where it was going to stay.
Nope, it's not staying there. I decided, picking it back up and flipping directly to that page. I tore it from it's bindings and ripped it to pieces, letting them fall to the floor. The paper was like confetti thrown after a surprise party or New Years, but I could still see a word spelled out on one of the pieces. Love.
"Whoa, looks like someone hated that song," Trish said as an entrance to the room.
"Yeah," I laughed awkwardly, picking up some of the scattered paper. "It wasn't my best."
"God, you look awful!" Thanks Trish. "Did you not sleep or something?"
"Apparently I fell asleep here," I told her stretching out my back for the umpteenth time that morning. "On the floor no less, so everything hurts. Honestly, I'm surprised that my parents didn't make me come home after last night."
She smiled, plopping down on the couch. "Well I told you not to drink that much. But, I also covered for you so they probably figured you're good," she paused for a second, waiting for me to sit down. I placed the paper into the garbage and settled down next to her. "Or they figured sleeping on the floor was a good punishment."
I laughed for the first real time that day. Yeah, knowing my parents that probably was their way of punishment. Not bad, considering some kids get grounded, or beaten, or some crazy weird thing like that. But, then again having your child sleep on the floor was pretty weird too. Maybe that wasn't the punishment, maybe they just didn't want to bother me. Or maybe they knew what I did. Or what if Austin went to my house last night and gave up when I wasn't there? Or-
"Hello? Earth to Ally!" Trish said, louder than her original conversation voice had been. "Honestly it's like you're not even interested!"
"I'm here, I'm listening!" I gave her a wry smile and she continued.
I was right. It was about Austin. After Kira had given her quiz to the many girls in our school, she had apparently vigourously consulted them. I assume it must've been hours of her doing it, but she finally produced a list of names. Trish told me she saw a post on Facebook this morning from Kira - which she had posted yesterday after school - with all the girls tagged. After Trish found that, there was something else also shocking on Facebook. But, she started by showing me the list.
Alison Kapshaw
Suzanne Doherty
Jessica Kent
Lisa Darcy
Rachelle Teller
Ophelia Yao
Hanna Quaker
Samantha Arnold
Regina Lohan
Kristina Ians
Eliana Ustarez
Alene Chambers
Judy Lafebre
Nicola Cage
Olivia Lawson
Sofia Parsons
Patricia Delaney
Maya Bianchi
Mona Tellers
Ginny Carr
Frankie Webber...
The list went on and on. There were probably about a hundred girls on this list. The thing that surprised me though, was that I wasn't on it.
"Oh my God," I whispered, hoping that Trish hadn't picked it up.
But she merely nodded her head and laughed. "Yeah I was surprised too."
"Surprised about what?" I asked.
"Probably what you're surprised about," she responded and held up two fingers. "How long the list is, and the fact that you aren't on it."
I smiled wryly and shifted on the couch. The fact that I wasn't on it not only shocked me, it almost made me feel uncomfortable. Was I not on the list, because she truly didn't think it was me? Or was it because she knew and wanted to catch me? Or maybe I was just over thinking everything. I've been known to do that, even on the slightest of things.
"Ok, enough of the list. I've got something so much better!" she smiled and quickly shuffled through her phone.
Her fingers went crazy across the keys and I knew that whatever it was, was also part of this saga. She turned her phone around to me and a YouTube video was now splattered across the screen. 'Austin Moon gets Called Out!' was the title of the video. The description was nothing more than, 'That Bastard!'. Of course, the comments said more of the same, I was instantly filled with a sense of both intrigue and dread.
I glanced over at Trish, she was grinning and nodding encouragement at me. Telling me to watch it. I took one more good look at the screen, that look told me that this video had gone viral, and in a very short amount of time. And then I pressed play.
"Austin, seriously? What the hell?" it was Kira. I could tell she was obviously exasperated, and hurt. I could also tell that this was not the first thing that had been said in this conversation.
"Kira I don't know what to tell you," he spoke quietly, defeated. He took a step backward and ran a hand through his hair. He looked awful. Not only did he look awful, he looked disappointed.
"You should tell me why you did it," she snarled.
He looked at her blankly. Eyes wide, hands shifting at his sides. When he looked down he finally spoke. "I was drunk."
She laughed mirthfully. Her hands came up into the air and a wild smirk graced her features. "That's bullshit Austin. You know that and I know that!" she was about to turn around and walk away when he called her back.
"Seriously? You think I did this on purpose? You think I set out yesterday with the intention of fucking someone at that party?" I could tell he was furious. The amount of times I'd heard him swear was maybe 10, including right there. But I accepted this anger, this obvious hatred directed at her, but really for himself. I could tell that with every fibre of his being, he was trying not to cry, trying not to yell, trying not to lash out.
She sniggered again and faced him, an eye brow raised as if daring him to speak again. When he didn't she shook her head and scuffed the pavement. "You're such an ass," she said.
"No," he said strongly and confidently. He was livid, he knew he was at fault here, but he didn't need this judgement placed on him. "You know who's the ass?"
"Who, Austin? Who might that be?" I could tell from her tone she already knew the answer. And I could tell she wasn't about to take it.
"It's the petty little girl who made a list of everyone she thought slept with her boyfriend. If that doesn't spell out douche, I don't know what does."
She laughed and held her hand up to his face. "Okay," she said placing a hand on her hip. "So let me get this straight. Not only are you calling me a bitch, but you're suddenly convinced you don't love me?"
He looked taken aback. This was not the response he thought she was going to say, that was clear. A thought struck me, and within the next second I knew that he had thought the same thing.
"Please Kira," he laughed just as she had. "If I loved you, then why would I do this?"
I now realized why so many people had commented bad things on this video. This little saying had even turned me a bit. I had been thinking it, but it's one of those things you don't say. Obviously she and others in the crowd felt the same way too. There were audible gasps from the crowd and Kira now looked on the verge of tears.
"You asshole!" someone shouted from the crowd. This was the first time Austin actually took in his surroundings, realized that people were indeed watching them. I saw a look of immediate regret cross his face. A look that I'd seen yesterday morning as he saw my bra pasted on the bulletin board.
"Kira," he said apologetically. "Kira, I'm so sorry!" he spoke. The sincerity in his voice struck me. Sincerity after such mirth was weird, but it made me hate him just a little more.
"What Austin? What, you're sorry? Bull fucking shit!" she finally let the tears spill over, I saw girls and boys alike in the crowd cover their mouths and shake their heads. "I trusted you! I loved you and I trusted you! And here's what you do, after 6 months of this, you go and fuck some other girl! You're not sorry and you never will be!" her body shook at the power of her words and the power of her sobs.
He stood there his face completely void of emotion. I could tell he didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to say, it looked as though he'd forgotten how to move. His mouth opened and closed as he looked for the right words. "I'm sorry," he settled on.
"Sorry doesn't cut it, bastard!" Kira spoke. She shook her head slowly and looked back up at him, a spark now in her watery eyes. "Sorry doesn't bring back a record deal."
I, along with everyone in the audience gasped. It was done for him, one stupid act had changed his career forever.
She was about to leave, when he finally found his voice again. Clearly feeling some sort of anger over this loss, he spoke. "She's not even on your list."
Then the video ended.
"Oh my God!" I said for about the millionth time that morning.
"I know," Trish said. I couldn't tell from her voice whether she was upset or amused. I knew I wasn't thoroughly unamused by all of this, but Trish was a wild card. "I don't know if he deserves that..." she said pointing to one of the comments.
'Thank God he lost his record deal! That bastard doesn't deserve to be in the business and the slut he was with deserves to rot in Hell! They both do!' It read.
"She doesn't deserve that either," I mumbled.
Trish nodded she felt bad, but was entertained. I realized that now, it was like any form of gossip with her. There's a certain amount of pity, but then there's absolute entertainment value. I hated that value. I hated that that video was on the internet, hated that I was technically the missing link in all of this. God, celebrities must feel awful.
"There's a part of me that absolutely loves the drama of this," Trish spoke excitedly, but there was a tiny lilt to her voice. "Then there's the other part of me that's like, he's one of your best friends. He made a mistake, he doesn't deserve to lose his whole career over this."
She looked solemn. That was exactly how I felt. If this was any other person I would've been playing the hating game and the entertainment game. But this was not just any person. This was Austin. And this was my fault. Not only was I solemn, I was guilty.
"Hey, you look like you're eating yourself up over this!" dhe said to me.
"I am. He doesn't deserve the whole world hating him!" I looked down at my hands, willing myself not to just spill the beans to Trish.
"Cheer up! It's not your fault! Come on let's go shopping or something to take your mind off of this," she smiled and pulled me off the couch. "Did you want to change and shower first though?" she asked, me a laugh already present in voice.
I shook my head and let myself give in. I needed to stop. At least for now I could let go.