A/N: I just couldn't wait to post this one, so I'm back! By the way, I really loved hearing you guys' thoughts on the last one. I considered naming it 'fifty shades of gray' just because I knew this Rick and Carol thing has been a bit divisive amongst the fandom, haha. I still don't know how I feel about it, really (though I certainly disagree with what Carol did). I just like the messiness of flawed people and trying to give them realistic reactions. So don't hate me, I wasn't making a statement about it one way or the other!

As for Rick and Carl, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make it seem like he's excluding Michonne, he just didn't want Carl to feel like they could never be alone. And I wanted space to give them their moment from the comic book. But yes, they are a unit and hopefully, that's resolved in this chapter, so I'll let you get to it! -Ash

9: a pocketful of soul

I don't wanna lose you now
I'm looking right at the other half of me
The vacancy that sat in my heart is a space that now you hold
Show me how to fight for now
And I'll tell you baby, it was easy coming back here to you
Once I figured it out
You were right here all along

Michonne shot up from her slumber in a small panic. Her dreams had taken her to a weird place - Rick's hand had been cut off, and Carl had been shot in the face, while Judith was nowhere to be found. And she was watching it all unfold, but there was nothing she could do to save them. She woke up in a sweat. It took her a moment to figure out where she was - in the church, surrounded by people she knew, some she loved. She wiped her face in relief that Carl was safely beside her, but she immediately noticed that Rick was missing.

"Rick?" she whispered into the darkness.

"He left," Abraham informed her groggily.

She frowned, not knowing what that could mean, but quickly picked herself up to go find out. She made a pit stop at Daryl's sleeping bag, telling him to keep an eye out for Carl, and crept out of the silent room.

She followed the long hallway to the sanctuary, relieved to find Rick sitting in one of the pews with Judith. They appeared to be playing some game, completely oblivious to her presence in the room. "You scared me to death, you know."

He looked over and smiled cluelessly, unsure of how he possibly could've done that. "What'd we do?"

"You were gone," she stated simply, taking a seat beside them. "I don't like waking up and not seeing you there."

He looked over to her, realizing that she was serious. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." He planted a quick kiss to the side of her face, near her neck. "This one has no respect for time. She was up and at 'em at five o'clock sharp."

"Oh, don't you try to blame her," she smirked. She gave Judith a tummy tickle, laughing as her little face contorted into a giggle. "She's too cute for that."

"That's true," he grinned. He stood her on his lap, watching in amusement as she tried to walk across he and Michonne's thighs. "You sleep okay otherwise?"

"I guess," she sighed. "It's so hot in there."

True enough, it hadn't been exactly comfortable with eleven of them in one room, but he wasn't willing to put them at risk by letting anyone sleep out in the open. "It's safest," he reminded her softly.

"I know."

"It'll be over soon," he promised. "I'm not letting them leave here with us."

"You have a plan?" she whispered, baffled.

"Yeah, I think so." He glanced over to gauge her reaction, seeing that she seemed pleased by the notion. He figured she had to be just as tired as he was of Gareth being in their midst. "I was gonna take Daryl out to look for some cars and talk to him about it today."

Judith had begun to reach for her hair, so she took the baby into her arms and let her go to town. "You think you could hold off on that trip for a day?"

"An entire day?" he frowned.

"A few hours," she appended.

"What are you up to," he smirked. "And don't say 'nothin'."

"I wasn't gonna say 'nothin'." She smiled a smile brighter than he'd ever seen, gazing into his eyes as if she could see what was on his mind. "I was just thinking..."

"Yeah..." Her smile was contagious, he couldn't help but match her grin.

"Well... we're in a church. Everyone that matters to us is here." She exhaled nervously as she realized what she was about to say. "Do you think Father Gabriel could marry us?"

Rick looked at her in a combination of wonderment, elation, and confusion, his blue eyes dancing across her beautiful features. Was she serious? "You serious?"

"If you want to, I mean."

"Of course I do. Are you kidding?"

She felt herself blushing, thankful her dark skin didn't sell her out. She looked at Judith, still fascinated with her locs, smiling at what was soon to be her step-daughter. "How 'bout you? Will you have me?"

She responded with happy blue eyes, as she always did. They were lucky Judith was such a cheerful baby. It made it so much easier to remember what they did all this for.

"I don't know how I ended up so lucky," Rick quietly declared, staring down at his hands. It had been months since he gave thought to taking off his first wedding ring. He wasn't sure why he hadn't done it sooner. There was always some reason another, but it probably boiled down to the fact that he just wasn't ready to say goodbye. But the moment had come, it was time to finally let Lori rest in peace. That was another life, someone else's slide show. He had moved on, and was thankful for the capacity to do so, given all they'd been through. He slowly slid his silver band from his hand, gazing at his daughter as he did. Maybe one day he would give it to her. Or perhaps he'd split it in half to give to both her and Carl. But for now, he would keep it safe while he embarked on this new journey with his new love. "Let's get married," he grinned.

"Hey." Michonne approached Carl where he sat on the front steps of the church, keeping an eye out for walkers. She hated to interrupt him while he did his favorite job, but she didn't have long, and she wanted to have a bit of a powwow with him. "Can we talk?"

"Sure," he answered nonchalantly. He moved over a few inches so she could sit.

"How you holdin' up," she wondered, accepting his offhanded offer.

He shrugged in reply. "I think I'm just glad to have everybody back together. Or, almost everybody."

She nodded, having felt that same peace, being reunited with most of the core prison group. "Finding your sister must've been a huge weight off your shoulders."

He smiled a big, genuine kid smile at the thought. "Yeah."

Michonne would've been lying if she said she hadn't noticed the shift in Carl's demeanor since he found out she was pregnant. They had been best friends, but he had noticeably pulled away from her, and she wanted to use that moment to make sure everything was copacetic. "So you're getting a new sister or brother," she stated as if he were unaware. "How do you feel about that?"

He shrugged again. "I'm happy for you guys, I guess."

"Oh well damn, don't get too excited there," she mocked his apparent indifference. "This is happening to you too, y'know."

"I know." His eyes focused in the ground in front of him for a while. He was halfway listening for walkers, halfway debating whether he wanted to just come out and ask Michonne the question that had been bugging him for so long. He eventually decided to go for it. "How do you feel about it? I mean, after what happened with Andre?"

She closed her eyes for a moment, touched by how sympathetic he was. She had no idea that was even on his radar. "I'm happy," she promised softly. "It makes me think of him a little more than I'm used to, but that's a good thing. I'm not hiding from it."

"How can you be happy then?"

"Because I learned that it's okay to move on. I was so consumed in anger and avoiding my grief that I didn't realize I hadn't processed it. I was just... gone," she explained. "But you and your dad? You brought me back. And... I feel like it's okay to live again. To try, anyway."

"Yeah, but how do you do that without being scared? Like so much could go wrong. It could end the way my mom did, and I'm not sure-," he stopped speaking when his voice broke. He hated thinking of what would happen if anything went wrong with this pregnancy.

"Carl, look at me," she requested quietly. He did as she asked, his big inquisitive blue eyes searching her empathetic brown ones for answers. "We can't live our lives worrying about what may or may not happen. Our choices have to reflect our hopes, not our fears. Especially now." He reminded her so much of his dad, she couldn't help but smile at him. "Everything's gonna be okay."

He nodded slowly as he processed her words. "I just wish things were like they used to be, I guess."

"Used to be like when?"

"Like at the prison. When we used to play games and we had our inside jokes and stuff. Everything seemed so simple there."

"Everything was simple there," she agreed with a wistful grin. "But nothing stays the same, kid. Not even you."

He looked at her with a small frown. "I'm the same."

"You're hardly the same person I met so many months ago. The one that kept his hand on his gun whenever I was in the room, and that ice cold stare."

"Well that's because you ended up being cool," he smirked playfully. "I'm still that person."

She gazed at him with a smile in her eyes. "You're so much more than that, you know."

"Pregnancy made you really sappy," he noted in feigned disgust.

"Pregnancy made me realize that just because you're breathing doesn't mean you're alive. You know what I mean?"

"I think so."

"I want us to have full lives, Carl. Me and your dad, you, your sister, this one," she rubbed her flat stomach. "I want us to grow old together. I want you to be pushing me and your dad around in wheelchairs."

"I'm pretty sure I should be doing that now," he taunted playfully.

"Oh, you got jokes," she realized with a light laugh. "Okay then."

The two of them sat there smiling for a few beats, Carl glad that he went ahead and said what was on his mind. He really had missed Michonne, but things just didn't seem the same anymore. She helped him realize that that wasn't necessarily a bad thing.

"So..." Michonne lightly nudged his knee with her own. "How would you feel if me and your dad got married?"

His eyes brightened at her question, as if he didn't believe she was asking it. "Really?"

"We can keep it hypothetical, if you'd like."

"But you want to."

"Today, if it's okay with you," she admitted. "But only then."

He considered what it meant for Michonne to be his dad's wife. For her to be his step-mother. Realistically, not much would change, most likely. They'd been operating as a family since they'd been on the road. But in his head, he felt like a seismic shift would occur if she officially became a Grimes. Like they wouldn't be able to be friends anymore because she would be his parent. He wasn't sure how to feel about it.

"Tell me what you're thinking," she interrupted his obvious musings.

"I... just don't want our relationship to change, I guess. If you become my step-mom."

"You think that means we can't be buddies anymore?"

He shrugged. "I was definitely never friends with my mom like this."

"Well here's the thing," she was smirking. "Our relationship gets to be whatever we want it to be. That's the beauty of getting older and figuring out who you are and what you want."

"So we can be both."

"Or neither," she shrugged. "Whatever you prefer."

He thought about this for a while before asking, "You really wouldn't marry my dad if I didn't want you to?"

Her stomach dropped at the thought. She didn't know what she'd do if he said 'No.' They were her family, and she didn't know how she would take it if he didn't want her to be a part of it. "I wouldn't," she promised. "I never wanna do anything to disregard you or your feelings."

"Even if it meant you and my dad wouldn't be happy?"

"Parents sacrifice things for their kids all the time. Nothing new."

He knew she was halfway joking about that, but it made him think. His dad really did put everything on the line for him, constantly, and he knew it. From the time he could remember, Rick had been there for him, and a lot of people couldn't say that about their fathers. That was certainly true now. His dad deserved happiness more than anyone he knew.

"Can I come to the wedding?" he looked over to Michonne, letting her know that this was his consent, if she really did need it.

She smiled brightly at his question and answer. "You better be there."

"I can be your best man," he offered softly. He realized then how happy he was about the news.

She noticed the glint of tears in his eyes and poked him lightly. "Now who's the sappy one?"

He wiped them quickly, much in the same way his father tended to do. "You still are."

She grabbed him and planted a big, sloppy kiss to the side of his unwitting face. "I love you so much, kid. Don't ever forget that."

He continued to pretend he hated the affection, wiping his cheek dramatically, but he made his true feelings clear. "I love you too, Michonne."

It's like you're my mirror
My mirror staring back at me
I couldn't get any bigger with anyone else beside me
And now it's clear as this promise
That we're making two reflections into one
It's like you're my mirror, my mirror staring back at me

It was a beautiful afternoon. Early Georgia summers tended to be that way – warm, serene, without a cloud in the sky. Michonne and Rick stood amid the grass behind the church, in front of Father Gabriel, while Carl and Judith sat a few feet away as witnesses to the moment.

"Marriage is perhaps the greatest and most challenging adventure of human relationships," Father Gabriel began. "No ceremony can create your marriage; only you two can do that – through love and patience, dedication and perseverance, talking and listening, tenderness and laughter, learning to forgive, learning to appreciate your differences, and learning to make the important things matter. You must let go of the rest. What this ceremony can do is witness and affirm the choice you make to stand together as partners in life." He looked to Rick and asked him pointedly, "Do you, Rick, take this woman to be your wedded wife?"

Rick smiled widely at Michonne as he replied, "I do."

"And do you, Michonne, take this man to be your wedded husband?"

A happy tear escaped to her cheek before she could answer. "I do."

"I understand that you have your own vows you'd like to say to one another. Before you do that, I ask you to remember that love, which is rooted in faith, trust, and acceptance, will be the foundation of this relationship. No other ties are more tender, no other vows are more sacred than those you now assume. There's no more civic law, so what you say today is out of pure desire to love and be loved by another person fully. Please, proceed," he directed Michonne.

"Rick… Thank you," she sniffled, taking his hand into hers. Her tears were falling so quickly and freely, she didn't bother trying to stop them. "My life, whatever it was before I met you, had been tragically empty. I was lost," she admitted quietly. "And I don't know why I was so lucky, but I thank God every single day that you found me, that you saved me." She glanced back at Carl, meaning the same for him as well. "There's a C.S. Lewis quote that says, 'Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.' I'm living proof of that, because here I stand, with my extraordinary destiny," she smiled through her tears. "Thank you."

"Thank you," he whispered to her with a tender grin.

"I know I'm imperfect," she went on.

"No, you're not," he interrupted to say.

"I am. So are you," she joked. "But it's why I love you. You reflect me, you complete me, you awaken the parts of me that I tried so hard to keep locked away." She exhaled softly, trying to maintain her composure, but she was crying almost uncontrollably now. "I know you're not going to quote poetry, I know you have a million responsibilities and I can't be on your mind every moment, but I know you're giving me a part of you that I can break, and I don't take that lightly. I promise not to hurt you. I don't want to change you. I promise to smile when you make me happy, yell when you make me mad, and miss you when you're not there."

"I'll always be there," he assured her with a smile.

"Shut up," she chuckled stuffily. "I promise to love hard, because there's no other way to do it. And because even if you're not perfect, you're perfect for me, Rick Grimes. And I'm in this with you, until death. I love you."

"I love you, too, Michonne."

"Even when I'm a blubbering mess?" she sniffled.

"Especially when you're a blubbering mess." He looked to Father Gabriel to make sure it was his turn.

"Go ahead, Rick."

He let out a big sigh, taking in the moment and everything that was happening. It had been such a strange set of circumstances that led him to this place, but he was nothing but grateful for them. All the catastrophe and death that surrounded him brought him to the love of his life. And as she stood there, pregnant and crying, more beautiful than he could even say, he just hoped this feeling would last forever.

"Around the time I first met Hershel," he started, "he said to me, and I'll never forget it, 'The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.' And at the time, I couldn't process it, because smiling was such a rarity. I was always running after some disaster or another, trying to keep my kids safe, trying to just keep my head above water," he nodded in recollection. "But then you came along. And suddenly, I understood what he meant. Suddenly, I found myself smiling again. And maybe it took me a little too long to realize I was in love with you, and it took you even longer to get over yourself," he winked teasingly. "But one thing I was clear on – you made me happy, Michonne." It was then he realized he was on the verge of tears himself. "So I promise to spend my life making you happy. To be your best friend." He cupped her face with his hands, wiping her tears that refused to stop coming down. "I promise that, no matter what happens from here, wherever we end up, our lives will be full of small, nameless moments where we do nothing but smile."

"Oh god," she was grinning and crying at the same time as she stared into his eyes. "You kill me sometimes, you know."

"I know."

"Do you two have rings, by any chance?" Father Gabriel wondered.

Rick dug into his pocket, pulling out a diamond band he'd spent much of the morning searching for. He hated stealing another woman's heirloom, even if she was a walker, but she certainly wouldn't need it, and he knew Michonne would cherish it. "I have one."

"I don't," Michonne winced, looking at Rick. "You didn't tell me we were doing rings."

"You didn't tell me we were getting married," he joked. "It's fine."

"But I wanna give you a ring now."

"We can find one later," he promised. "You're kind of interrupting our wedding here."

She only stared at him, half amused, half annoyed, but was willing to continue, when Carl hopped up from his seat.

"I have one," he proclaimed proudly.

"You have a ring?"

"Yep." He went into the pocket of his own jeans and pulled out a simple gold band. "I don't know if it'll fit, but me and Daryl went looking, just in case you guys needed them," he explained simply. He looked at Michonne with a smirk, "I told you I'd be your best man."

She smiled widely at him, taking the band and handing it over at Father Gabriel. "Thank you, Carl."

"Rick, place this ring on Michonne's finger and repeat after me," the Father instructed. "'I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of my promise to love you as long as I live.'"

He did as told, taking Michonne's hand into his, softly placing the band on her left third finger. "I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of my promise to love you as long as I live."

Michonne did the same, gazing into Rick's happy blue eyes at she did. "Rick, I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of my promise to love you as long as I live."

Father Gabriel looked on happily as he watched them complete their action. "By the power of your love and commitment, and the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss each other."

The joy on their faces was insurmountable. Rick leaned into his new wife, letting his lips fall to her cheeks first, kissing away her tears, and then found her mouth. Her hands gripped his face as they chastely enjoyed one another's lips and pulled apart contentedly. It was official.

"Get over here," Rick called back to Carl with a giant smile. As he approached, he held Michonne closely and whispered into her ear, "Looks like you're mine now."

She smiled back as her family moved in to embrace them. "I always was."

Now you're the inspiration for this precious song
And I just wanna see your face light up since you put me on
So now I say goodbye to the old me, it's already gone
And I can't wait to get you home just to let you know
You are, you are the love of my life

Lyrics: "Mirrors" - Justin Timberlake (The 20/20 Experience)