I do not own the Twilight story or any of its characters or settings.

I just like messing with Stephenie Meyer's characters in my own plots!

Released to a Bar of Typical Boasting Men

"Are they here yet?" Alice called to Sam who was standing at the door peeking out.

He shook his head no while still laughing at a joke Edward Masen had just said.

She resumed wiping the bar and talking to Sam's wife, Emily. "Emily, I love you, but your husband is no help sometimes."

"You have no idea. You should see how he pretends to be sleeping when Leah needs her diaper changed in the middle of the night."

"He is such a typical man!" Alice said laughing with her friend.

"Hey!" Emmett exclaimed as he set a new case of beer on the counter next to Emily to put in the under counter, bar fridge. "I wake up every single time that Rose wants to have sex in the middle of the night."

Rose laughs as she appears at Emily's side. "Ladies, this is a true gentleman."

"Thank you, Rose." Emmett says smiling, ignoring her sarcasm and began to unload the case.

Rolling her eyes at him, Alice turns to her cousin. "Have they called you to say they are almost here?"

"Alice, your parents will be here soon." Rosalie said grabbing her cousin's hand to stop her from cleaning the same spot for the thousandth time. "You see them every day. What is the rush to get them here?"

Alice threw the rag at her cousin's face. "I don't know. Maybe I am all worked up because my dad is finally out of the hospital after two weeks?"

"He is in a wheelchair with scrapes and bruises, but he is alive. He would hate himself if he realized how stressed you are making yourself over his injury." Rose said tossing the rag back.

"She is right, Mary Alice." Esme said surprising the little group. Noticing the looks of surprise at being without Carlisle, she said, "That Jasper fellow from Forks and Sam told me to come inside and they would help your father get out of the car."

"Jasper is here?" Alice squeaked.

Four sets of eyes turned to her with not much shock in their eyes.

"Do you want some cheese, little mouse?" Emmett asked, laughing so loud that the entire bar turned to look at him.

Rose turned around, waving her hands at the looking crowd. "Go back to your own business. You all know my husband. He thinks he is as funny as Jim Carrey. Carlisle will be inside any second now. Watch the door."

Emily gently adjusts Leah in her baby sling and leans closer to Alice across the bar. "Did you just express interest in a guy, a fire fighter to be exact?"

"You haven't had any romantic or even lustful interest in any guy since you were attacked." Rose adds quietly.

"I love that my friends and my cousin take such an interest in my sex life." Alice said hoping to shut them up.

Then, she turned tomato red as her mother counters with, "I believe they are talking about your lack of a sex life, Mary Alice." She smiles softly and adds, "I think it is nice that you are at least thinking about putting yourself out there again. Just no sex before there is at least a little bit of commitment between you two."

"Way to be progressive, Aunt Esme!" Rosalie says giving her aunt a high five behind Emily's back.

"I am the product of a flower child and a hippie. Plus, I did have my own fun before I was married." Esme said causing the entire gathered group to choke on air.

"I hate you all, especially you." Alice said pouting and jerking her chin toward her mother.

"Now, is that anyway for my only daughter to look and talk when I finally roll into her bar?" Carlisle piped up from behind his wife with Sam pushing him.

Alice smiled at her father, "You are the only one that will get a smile from me tonight. Plus, you get to drink from my personal stash."

"Alice, your father cannot have alcohol!" Esme scolded.

Rosalie quickly added, "Forget him. Alice cannot have alcohol!"

"He can have some of my orange and cranberry juice that I have behind the bar." Alice said shaking her head at their lack of faith in her.

Jasper must have slipped in when Alice was being teased because she looked up to see him making his way through the crowd. He made it to the far wall and joined some of the other Fork's fire fighters who had come to help celebrate Carlisle's release from the hospital. She saw Edward hand Jasper a bottle of beer as he glance her direction. Their eyes locked and she froze like she had every time they had run into each other at the hospital.

Alice almost gave herself whiplash as she turned her attention back to her petite mother spinning her much larger husband in a circle to show off his new sporty wheelchair. People were laughing at her antics and patting Carlisle gently on the back and knees. He was smiling and cracking jokes that now he can really sweep Esme off her feet as he looked up at everyone, even those that bent over to talk to him.

Emily gave Sam the baby and came around the bar. She and Rosalie knew exactly what to do. They stood on either side of Alice and linked supportive arms behind her waist.

Emily whispered in her ear, "Hey, Sam has the day off tomorrow. Ben is covering the bar tomorrow evening. I think we need to go out for dinner and a movie, just the four of us."

"Who is just the four of us?" Alice asked.

"The usual crew: you, Rosalie, Angela, and myself." Emily answered. "Personally, I need a couple hours to myself after Sam taking my keys and trapping me at home because he doesn't want Leah to go outside and get too cold."

"I don't know." Alice said biting her lip.

"I do!" Rosalie added.

Angela chimed leaning on the bar after coming out of the back room. "We have some planning to do if we are going to get Japer to do more than check you out from across the room."

"He doesn't just watch her from across the room." Emmett added leaning backward on the bar interrupting the small hen party. "He would watch her ass as she walked away when they passed each other in the hospital."

Esme and Carlisle left after about an hour. Everyone understood that he needed to be home and she needed him home before either of them could truly begin to heal. Sam and Emmett followed them in Emmett's jeep. They two guys joked with everyone that they just wanted to see Carlisle attempt to get up the ramp they had built for him in one try. Everyone knew the truth of that, too. They were tagging along to make sure Carlisle made it safely in his house for Esme, Alice, and Rosalie.

Even though she was really tired and Ben was behind the bar, Alice stuck around downstairs instead of leaving right after her parents. She cleaned the same glass over and over again until her cousin-in-law and her friend returned.

"The rooster has landed." Emmett exclaimed to get Alice's attention after slamming open the bar's door. He had made his way straight to her. "He was actually crowing about letting Esme install an elevator during one of the last renovations."

"He is such a typical man!" Alice said laughing again with her friends.

"Too bad we all know he did it because he couldn't carry her up the stairs while making out in his old age." Sam added laughing and causing everyone in earshot to choke on their drinks.

"Eww!" Alice shrieked. "She told me she wanted it to impress her clients when she moved her office home to be with me while I was recovering."

Author's Note~

For the couple of people that have asked, this is the fun before another batch of drama. I really hope you are enjoying this story. Let me know what you think, like, love, or hate!

~KaliCali77