A/N: Here's the new chapter, sorry it took so long. Emotional reunions are kind of a challenge for me to write. This is also the longest chapter so far, coming it at 2000 more words than the previous one. A bit more setting up here, before I start throwing everything together. Anyway, enjoy.
Big thanks to my beta oinkythepiggy for help with this.
o.o.o.
Everything was murky, fuzzy. A single thought took a massive effort to form. She felt heavy too, like she was made of stone. Maybe moving wasn't a good idea.
Somewhere, somehow, Shepard knew this should be a bad sign. She should be worrying. She just couldn't remember why. There were other things she was supposed to be remembering. Important things. Very, very important things. It was just hard to recall why they were so very important.
Besides, it was dark. That wasn't good either.
Eventually some part of her remembered opening her eyes might help with that dark thing. After some thought, she decided it was worth a try. It proved to be harder than she remembered it being. It felt like her eyelids were made of lead, and didn't want to move very much. Still, for some reason she knew this was important. Slowly, bit by bit, she forced her lids to raise.
She winced at the first crack of light that leaked. She hadn't remembered anything being that bright. After a few seconds, however, her sight adjusted to the outside world and she forced her eyes open the rest of the way.
The first thing she saw was a ceiling. A rather cracked and worn ceiling, but still a ceiling. Somehow that seemed off. She hadn't been somewhere with a ceiling, had she? She frowned, something important nudging at the edge of her mind.
She remembered space. No, not space exactly…a spaceship. Crucible.
Yeah, that was it, the Crucible. Or had it been the Citadel? Somewhere. Big windows. Battles going on outside. Then…then…she frowned harder when she realized she couldn't remember much after that. Something about an AI and frustration and lots of red. It slipped away when she thought too much about it.
But okay, she had been somewhere else. That much was obvious. Where was she now, then? She turned her head slightly to try and get her bearings. This was a small, mostly bare, room. Nothing much beside the bed, and a couple of chairs. There were a few machines around the bed though. The sort of things she would expect to find in a hospital. Was she in a hospital? There was that sort of disinfectant smell hospitals had about them. She knew she'd been hurt. She still did hurt, although it felt distant. Painkillers, some part of her mind said. It would make sense. Even before she had stepped into the beam she had been…
The beam. Citadel. The Illusive Man. Anderson. Reapers. The thought trigger a flood of memories and reality crashed back into her head. She was alive somehow, and she had no right to be. She still wasn't sure what had happened, though, and the end of the battle was muddled. There was a point where her memories just refused to form. Bits and pieces of events that didn't make sense formed, then melted away before she could figure out what the whole picture was. She just knew that she hadn't been…wherever this was. Something must have happened. Something big. She had to figure out what that was. They might still need her.
Immediately she tried to jerk upright, but it was like someone had taken out all her bones and replaced them with lead. After some struggle she managed to get enough energy to raise her arm. One of the machines around her started to beep angrily at her in protest. Shepard glared at it, wondered why if all machines were designed to annoy her, then turned her attention back to getting out of bed. She had no idea what had happened after…whatever she had done in the Citadel. The Crucible must have done something if she was here. Whether it had actually helped or not was up in the air right now. She had to find someone, get some answers for all of this.
The door to the room flew open almost as if in answer to her vague thoughts. On the other side was one of the last people she had expected to see.
"Miranda?" Shepard croaked. Her voice sounded a lot rustier than she remembered it being. It was hard to force the words out.
Still, that little sound was enough to get the attention of the other woman. "Shepard?" Miranda said, her voice softer than usual and her eyes wide. Then she moved, faster than Shepard remembered her being, and she was by the bedside. "You remember my name?" she said as she checked the display on one of the machines.
Shepard stared at her in confusion, and wondered if she had hit her head harder than she had thought. Why was Miranda asking that? "Uh, yeah. Kind of hard to forget it." her throat still felt dry, and scratchy. Like she hadn't spoken in a while.
"That's good," Miranda visibly relaxed. "Do you remember your name?"
"Yes," Now Shepard was fairly certain she wasn't the one who had been hit on the head. And this really wasn't telling her where she was. At least it felt like it was getting easier to talk. "Yes, Miranda, I know my own name. What I don't know is where the hell I am and how I got here!" She attempted to sit up again, but her muscles were still doing their limp noodle impression.
"I'll tell you if you stop that!" Miranda placed a hand on her shoulder. "You've been unconscious for a little over a month Shepard. I'm trying to determine if you're still mentally sound." The other woman shook her head as she reached down and tapped something that made the head of the bed raise up a little more. "Although with you I'm not sure 'mentally sound' was ever an accurate description.
Shepard barely noticed Miranda's last quip. "Over a month? I've been laying here for over a month?" She tried to force herself up again, and managed to get into something like a sitting position. Unfortunately her legs had decided they didn't want to go along with her plan of getting out of bed. Miranda moved to make her stay still, and Shepard glared at her. "Why the hell did you let me sleep so long? What happened out there, after the Crucible? What about the war? The Reapers? Where is…"
"The Reapers are gone," the new voice came from the door way. Both women looked up as Dr. Chakaws stepped though. She was smiling, relief radiating from her. "Shepard, it's good to see you again."
"Chakwas?" Shepard stared at the doctor for a few moments of incomprehension before her brain could even try to make sense of this. "You're here too? But the Normandy.."
"The Normandy is fine," Chakwas moved over to join them. "And before you can ask, yes, Garrus and Tali made it out all right despite their injuries."
"They are? You're sure about that?" Shepard said slowly as her jumbled memories of what had happened during that frantic dash toward the beam. "And the Reapers are…gone?" She let herself sink back down to the bed as her mind tried to process that.
"I treated both of them myself," the Normandy's doctor said patiently. "and yes, the Reapers are gone. Dead would probably be more accurate, but either way, they aren't here to bother us anymore." She stepped closer, and Shepard finally noticed the unsteady smile on her face. "It's good to see you up again Shepard. You've been out so long you were even starting to worry me" She reached down and laid a hand on her shoulder. It weirded out Shepard a little to know that she was the cause of Chakwas being this openly emotional.
"Sorry about that?" Shepard said uncertainly. "It's good to see you too. Nice waking up to familiar faces instead of just another scientist. I've kind of gotten tired of that."
"I would have been here sooner, but I only just got the news." Chakwas turned a glare on Miranda.
"I sent you a message as soon as I became aware of it myself," the former Cerbus agent shot back. "It's not like I could control how far away you were." She had her omintool out and was checking the readings on one of the machines, but paused, a small smile on her face. "I will have to add that Dr. Chakwas was not the only one worried. You have a great many people waiting for you."
Shepard was sure she knew of at least one person that would fit the description. Actually, now that her thoughts were a little clearer, she was wondering where he was. She must have said his name without meaning too because Chakwas chuckled. "Garrus is over at the turian command center. When he's not by your side, he's been working himself to the bone to distract himself. I'm sure he'll be here as soon as he can."
"Sooner, if he can manage it I imagine," Miranda commented. "I did send him a message myself. I wouldn't want to see his reaction if I hadn't."
That was enough to bring a faint mile to Shepard's face, and she felt a little lighter. Time to focus on more important things. "That's nice. Really. But could someone please tell mewhere the hell I am and how I got here?"
Both doctors looked at it each other. "You're in a hospital," Chakwas said after a moment. "It's one of the few left standing, and naturally it was considered the only place to bring the galaxy's hero. Although they are keeping it quiet for now. Not many even know you're here."
"Before you ask," Miranda chimed in, "Dr. Tsoni and Lieutenant Vega found you at the beam site. You were…very badly wounded when they brought you. We weren't even sure you were going to survive. Of course, they underestimated how immeasurably stubborn you are."
"The beam…site?" she struggled to recall where the hell that was. "How did I get there?"
"No one knows," Chakwas said briskly. "Granted, the scientists all have numerous pet theories on the subject, but no one was willing to commit to anything until you were awake to confirm any of them."
Shepard couldn't imagine how anyone could think she would be able to answer any of their questions. Now when she could barely remember anything herself. Then again politicians were idiots and probably wouldn't even believe that. Miranda was saying something about exhaustion being a natural reaction to something, but she wasn't paying attention. It was getting harder to focus on thinking again. She was tempted to just closer her, eyes for a couple of seconds, just to rest them…at the last second she realized what was happening and forced herself awake. She had already slept enough; she was not going to waste anymore time!
Still, she could feel exhaustion dragging at her and she cast her mind out trying to find something to keep herself awake. Then, suddenly she realized if she had been found where the beam had picked her up from, maybe there was a chance she hadn't been the only one to come back.
"Anderson," she said out loud, "if they found me, they must have found him too, right?."
The silence from both the other people in the room was answer enough even before Chakwas said softly, "I'm sorry Shepard. He didn't make it."
Shepard had tried not to hold onto too much hope, but it still felt like a blow. There had been a part of her searching for some way he would make it out alive. "Damn it!" Something wet trickled down the side of her face. Quickly she closed her eyes, hoping no one had seen the tears. If either Miranda or Chackwas had, they didn't mention it.
"He died a hero, Shepard," Miranda said. "His sacrifice is already being honored."
"Still, he didn't deserve to die up there," Shepard said, and opened her eyes to stare up at the ceiling again. It took more effort than she thought it should and she could feel the exhaustion creeping up on here again.
"No one deserved to die out there," Chakwas said firmly, "and I doubt he would be very pleased with you moping about after his death. He would probably insist you concentrate on recovering and getting back on your feet. You are a hero, Shepard."
"He probably would," Shepard had to admit, "and I don't feel like a hero at the moment."
"That's because you need rest," Dr. Chakwas' voice sounded far away. Shepard snorted slightly, but allowed her eyes to drift close. She was only going to rest for a second. That was it, all she was going to allow herself. She swore it.
Her intent, however, seemed to matter little to her body. She felt herself slipping back into sleep, and this time didn't have the strength to fight it.
Shepard wasn't sure how much time had passed when she opened her eyes again. There were no windows, and no one had decided to leave a clock where she could see it. Not that it really mattered anyway, but it would be nice to know how much more time she had wasted. Long enough that Miranda and Chakwas had left, at least. She wasn't alone though, not anymore. Garrus was in a chair by her bedside, one hand resting on hers. He looked tired, and hadn't seemed to notice she was awake.
Even though Dr. Chakwas had told her he was all right, seeing him again brought on a rush of relief and other emotions. He really was all right, even his head kept falling forward like he was going to doze off at any moment. That he was pushing himself that hard, just for her, was both touching and slightly exasperating. Maybe she should have felt more annoyed with him, but seeing him just felt far too good for her to sustain it. There was that sense of peace that he always brought with him, even in the middle of the war. As she watched his head nod forward again, she wondered if it was possible for turians to outright fall asleep while standing.
"That can't be comfortable," she croaked out loud. Despite how bad she must have sounded the words made Garrus jerk upright all at one, all trace of drowsiness in his eyes gone.
"Shepard?" he said, a sharp keen creeping into his subvocals as he pinned her with an intense gaze. It felt like he was studying every inch of her, and if she had more energy it would have made her shiver. She loved it when he looked at her like that.
This time all she could do was smile. "Yeah," she turned her hand over to grip his. "Hey."
He made a strangled sound, then the next thing she knew he was pressing his forehead against her, stroking the side of her face with his free hand. "You're awake," his voice shook "You're awake! Spirits. You...you...stupid, reckless, idiotic, heroic...human. Do you know how much of a hassle you are? Blowing everything, including yourself, up, and then deciding to just sleep for days on end and let everyone else do all the work." She could hear the desperation in his shaking words and felt a rush of guilt.
"Sorry 'bout that," she muttered, returning the pressure against her forehead as best she could. "Wasn't planning on blowing myself up but, just, you know, Reapers. Always have to make things more complicated, even after they're dead."
"I think you have them beat out when it comes to complicating things," Garrus grumbled and slowly eased back. "Really Shepard, you don't have to turn everything into a competition."
"But that's the fun part," she had to clear her throat before she could get the words out but tried to grin about it. She couldn't put any energy into it though, and Garrus reached over to smooth a hand through her hair.
"In all seriousness, you did have me worried Shepard," he said, his voice still not totally steady. "There were so many reports coming in, all of them conflicting, and then someone told me that you'd been confirmed dead..." his voice started to keen again. Shepard squeezed his hand again.
"Come on, you should know me better than that," she said lightly. "Even I'm capable of following orders when I want too. Had some pretty convincing ones telling me to come back." His words still echoed crystal clear in her mind. She remembered that much, even though the rest of her memories of what exactly had happened after she had activated the Crucible were refusing to cooperate with her.
Garrus flared his mandibles slightly. "I suppose I am pretty convincing. But, I also doknow you Shepard. That's what had me worried. If I had lost you.." his voice trailed off into nothing.
"Hey, I'm here," she said and tried to sit up slightly and reach out for him. Her body, however, decided to inform her that she was still weak and that was a Bad Idea. Weakness dragged her back down, and the pain of injuries that were little more than half-healed made her hiss.
Garrus was there immediately, peering at her in horror. "Don't do that! Can't you stay still for more than two seconds?"
"Not really," Shepard grunted as she tried to get herself back into a comfortable position. "Although it looks like I'm not gong to have much of a choice right now. Ow, dammit."
Garrus actually chuckled, a little shakily. "I know you like being difficult, but now might be a good idea to listen to the nice doctors." He helped her get settled, but didn't pull back all the way. He stayed close, as if he half expected her to try this again. She really couldn't bring herself to tell him to move away.
"I suppose I can," she admitted begrudgingly. "But only until I'm a bit better. I'm not staying here a moment longer than I have to. Soon as I can stand I'm heading straight back towards the Normandy. I can recover better there than in a hospital." Garrus hadn't said anything. He was just staring at her and gripping her hand tightly.
"What?"
"I missed you Shepard," he said quietly, not taking his eyes off her. "I just...it was lonely out there with out you." There was so much emotion in those words, and in his eyes, that it was hard to meet them. Shepard was still having trouble wrapping her head around how long she had been out, but suddenly she was wondering what it must have been like for someone on the outside. The waiting..She wasn't sure she would have been able to deal with something like that. If this had happened to Garrus, if she hadn't even known if he would wake up…. that was something she didn't want to think about.
She tried to swallow around the lump in her throat. Even though her arms still felt like lead she still managed to raise a hand far up enough to stroke his unscarred mandible. "Well I'm back," she told him softly. "So quit worrying about it, okay?"
That got a snort of him as he leaned into her touch. "Hard not to worry when I have a girlfriend who seems to make a habit out of forgetting about little things like personal safety."
"Like you're any bett.." a coughing fit interrupted her. Garrus gave a shocked growl.
"What's wrong? Should I call for someone? I can get.."
"It's fine," she managed to get out. "My throat's just really dry. Is there water or something around here?"
"Ah yeah, Miranda left it, hold on..." Garrus stood, and disappeared passed the head of her bed. There were sounds of him moving something around, then he reappeared with a small paper cup in his hand. "Here, let me." He slid an arm under her shoulders and lifted her a bit, but when he tried to raise the cups to her lips, Shepard pulled away.
"I can drink for myself," she said dryly. She couldn't remember a time when she was conscious and she couldn't at least eat or drink by herself. It took effort, sure, but she was not helpless child. She could do this. She was going to do this.
"Are you sure?" Garrus flared his mandibles in distress. "You really don't look good Shepard."
"I'm sure," she said as she inched her hands slowly up. She managed to get a hold of the cup, which was bigger than she thought it was, and brought it up to her mouth. Garrus kept her propped up and watched anxiously as she sipped carefully. She wasn't shaking exactly but it was work to keep her hands steady, and she was not going to embarrass herself by splashing it all over after making such an effort to argue about it.
Even those few sips made her feel much better. Suddenly things didn't seem as hard "See? Told you," she said as Garrus took the cup away. He snorted and she used him turning away for a second to hide how quickly she dropped her hands back onto her lap. Yeah, she felt better but apparently that wasn't enough. Still have a ways to go yet, she thought as she glared at her hands. She just hoped that the weakness was only temporary. The mere thought of it being more permanent, of never being able to be a soldier again, made her shake slightly. The Alliance had been her whole life since she had joined it. What would she do if she had to give that up?
She had almost forgotten Garrus was it he room with her until a three-fingered hand wound around one of her own. Shepard jerked her head up automatically and met a pair of worried blue eyes.
"You know," the turian said slowly. "I kept talking to Dr. Chakwas when she showed up. You know, about how you were doing, when you were going to wake up...stuff a worried boyfriend usually asks doctors about. One thing she mentioned to me was that you were healing faster than any decent human being had a right to be."
"So I'm not decent now?" she chuckled and squeezed his hand gently.
He flared a turian grin at her. "You really want me to answer that, Shepard?" He shook his head, "The point is, whatever enhancements Cerberus stuck in you seemed to be doing a pretty good job of making sure your body was fine. Chakwas just seemed a tiiiny bit concerned that you might be a bit, hmmm, drained for a while. Humans aren't krogan after all, so this time you aren't going to be able to dance away without some sort of consequences."
"Wait," Shepard said slowly as she started to process what he had just told her. This was what Miranda had been babbly about earlier, wasn't it? "All..this is just a side effect?" A shuddering sense of relief swept through her. She tried to keep it out her voice. Covering it with annoyance was good. "So how long am I going to be stuck with it?"
"You know, most people like to take a break after they get back from saving the galaxy. I think you of all people have earned that," Garrus drawled. "But if you're really that intent on jumping straight back into the fray, then you're going to have to ask Dr. Chakwas. Or Miranda. They can tell you when you can expect to be back on your feet. Just try not to kill anyone when they don't clear you immediately."
Even though Garrus was keeping his tone light, there was worry and sympathy in his eyes. Her cheeks flushed. She didn't need sympathy, and she hadn't meant to worry him. How had he even known what to say anyway? He was always a little too good at figuring out what she was feeling, damn turian. Then again, he had been a cop, and he knew her. Knew her very well, when it came down to it. Honestly, it kind of felt good, not having to explain why the thought of being so helpless made her shake. He probably understood the feeling.
She felt the annoyance she had at him slipping away. It should have been scary, being with someone that knew her that well. Earlier in her life she certainly would have tempted to run away from it. Now, after everything she had been through with him, it just felt comforting knowing that she didn't have to stumble through words about a fear like that. He wouldn't make fun of her about it either. Just accept it as part of her.
"I'll keep my temper in check," she said and smiled at him. "Or at least I'll try. Even I know it's bad manners to growl at the people who put you back together."
"As if you humans could growl, even if you wanted to," Garrus leaned forward to brush a lock of hair out of her face. "Granted, you almost manage it but nothing any self respecting turian would call a growl."
For a few moments just enjoyed having him this close. This close though, she couldn't help noticing changes that she hadn't before, when she had been a bit distracted. There were new pot-marks and pitting on the unscarred side of his face, and even the skin of his neck had a few still healing cuts.
"I guess you've had some experience with growling at doctors," she said quietly. "Fairly recently, I guess." He pulled away and looked at her in confusion. "You could barely walk the last time I saw you, Garrus. It's nice to see you on your feet."
His mandibles dropped in confusion and he stared at her for a few seconds. "You have no idea how many things I want to say to that. My girlfriend runs straight into an alien deathbeam and she's worried about me.. I'm beginning to think you really did knock something lose in your head."
"Humor me?" She asked. "You can't really blame me for being a little worried after...everything else." Her throat closed and she tried very, very hard not to think about what happened up there in the Citadel. Anderson was something she wasn't sure she was ready to deal with. She wasn't sure she would ever be. Something must have show in her eyes because Garrus moved forward and pressed his forehead against hers.
"Of course, Shepard," he rumbled soothingly before pulling away just a little. "But look, I'm fine. You really think Chakwas would let me be up and walking around if I wasn't?"
He wasn't lying. She could read him enough to know that, and it made her relax some. "I think you could find some way around her orders if you wanted to. I'm pretty sure I remember you doing it before."
"Yeah, but," he flared his mandibles in distress, "Shepard..Lil, I.."
"I know," she said quickly. "I believe you this time, really."
"Good," he rumbled. "Because I actually feel a lot better than I did this morning. Have a weight off my mind now."
"Yeah, sorry about that." Shepard couldn't help nodding towards the cut on his neck. "Just noticed you had a few more scars."
"So do you," he observed, running his thumb over a spot on her hand. Considering how bad she remembered the wounds she remembered were, she could imagine that. There were probably a dozen other injuries that she had forgotten about that had made things worse.
"Probably," she agreed. "Guess we'll just have to show them off to each other later." She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. That actually seemed to hurt a little and she resolved not to do it again. At least it startled a laugh out of her boyfriend.
"Are you really that insatiable,?" he said as he straightened all the way. "No wait, I'm not sure I want you answer that. I do think I'll get frowned at a little for taking advantage of you before you were back to your old self."
That got a laugh out of her. It jolted something in her chest that told her how sore she really was underneath the painkillers, but it felt good to laugh again. "I think we could debate over who was taking advantage of who in that situation," she squeezed his hand, "but I'll be good for once. Tell me what happened with Normandy instead. Chakwas said it was fine, but more detailed reports are always appreciated."
"She got a bit banged up, but nothing that can't be fixed," Garrus flared his mandibles in a grin. "And before you ask, yeah, everyone is fine. Just kindly remember to send us a warning the next time you decide to fire a doomsday weapon."
"So that's what you would call the Crucible? A doomsday weapon?" Shepard felt a tiny thrill of alarm at that. She didn't actually remember what the crucible had done only that something had happened. She had no idea how destructive it was. If Garrus was calling it a doomsday weapon..
"I think that Reapers would have called it one," he was grinning. "You set it off, boom, flash of light, and then suddenly all of them stopped moving. Whatever you did got the ground forces too."
"Good," she said letting herself relax. She had fallen asleep before Chakwas could giver her any details, and it was nice hear it. "But that's it? Just a flash of light?"
"Well, light, and a lot of energy. Didn't do much though, knocked a few ships, caused problems with some of their equipment, and did little things like short out the mass relays. That's all."
"What?" she tried to jerk upright before Garrus gave a worried keen and stood. She kept her eyes on him as she settled her shaky body back down. "I shorted out the mass relays?" They would be cut off from the rest of the galaxy without the mass relays. Everyone would be stranded, and if they couldn't get them operational again then there were some who might never see their homes again.
"Calm down," Garrus said firmly. "Youdidn't do anything. It was the Crucible, and you know that most of the people here right now would willingly have traded the relays for the death of the reapers."
"Still a big sacrifice to make," she muttered, subsidiing a little.
Garrus snorted. "It's not like they were destroyed," he pointed out, "teams have been out working on them since they moment they could get out there. There's no physical damage, just overtaxed. The quarians and the geth both say they'll be able to get them working again fairly soon."
"The qurians and the...geth?" Somehow that made her feel better. There was something mixed in with the muddled memories of the crucible that said she should be relived and happier about this.
"Yep," Garrus was saying. "Good job you made peace between them. Otherwise we would be waiting a hell of a lot longer. It's pretty impressive what they can do together after someone knocked sense into them."
"You're sure about that?" She couldn't keep the anxiousness out of her voice and Garrus sighed.
"Yes, Shepard, I am sure. As sure as I can be without going out there myself, which, you know, is something I really have no desire to do."
"I don't really want you to leave either," she said softly. "And okay, I believe you," She tried to smile and change the subject, "so I take it the Normandy was one of the ships that got tossed around a little?"
"Umm...not exactly."
The flanging on his voice had gotten wider and he looked away. Her eyes narrowed. "Garrus?"
"We did get knocked about a bit, yeah, but EDI going off line was kind of a bigger problem."
"What!?" Shepard yelped, but this time before she could try to move Garrus had his hands on her shoulders.
"Would you stop that?" his mandible were splayed in distress again. "You hurt yourself again and Chackwas is going to get mad at me. Then ban me from being here. Not something either of us wants."
"You told me EDI went offline and I'm supposed to be calm about this?"
"Went off line for a little bit," he said quickly. "We got her running again, so don't worry about it. No one has noticed anything different about her, even Joker, and EDI says there aren't any system anomalies." Shepard frowned at him still not convinced, and Garrus shook his head slightly. "I checked myself, Shepard. The only thing we can't account for is why that robot body of hers won't work. No matter what we do we can't get into it, but that's not critical or anything at the moment."
"I can call up Joker if you want. I'm sure he'll be more than happy to tell you all about it," Garrus added. He didn't really look happy about the prospect and Shepard sighed.
"No, no, that's all right. I'll believe you," she sighed, "I can guess that Joker is really not happy about the situation. I don't need him talking my ear off about it right now."
"'Not happy' really doesn't cover it," Garrus agreed. "Although at the moment I think he's worried that EDI might actually take up the geth's offer to use one of their platforms."
"Please tell me I didn't hear you correctly. The geth wanted EDI to join them?" she just stared wide-eyed at Garrus, who chuckled at her expression.
"Not join them exactly. They just thought they would be neighborly and lend her a 'mobile platform' until hers was operational again."
Shepard couldn't help laughing at the mental image that conjured up. It still hurt, but she couldn't help herself "Please tell me someone has a picture of Joker's face when that happened. I can just picture his expression."
"Oh, I think Tali might," Garrus chuckled. "As her the next time you see her. I'm sure she'll be more than happy to hook you up."
"Think she'll come by?" The prospect of seeing Tali again made her feel a little happier. Tali, Liara, Joker...it would be good to see all of them with her own eyes. Hearing about how they were doing was a pale substitute to that.
"I think it'll be harder to keep her away," Garrus said.
They talked a bit more after that, about the status of the Normandy, how the crew was holding up, but gradually it became more about her listening and Garrus speaking. She had always loved his voice. Aside from downright sexy, it was soothing to listen to sometimes. She didn't even mind listen to him jabber about things in the Thanix she only half-understood because of it. It was relaxing, comforting...
She didn't realize just how relaxing it was to hear him again until his voice changed to something sharper. "Shepard?"
She jerked out of the half doze she was in. "Mmm?" she said tiredly as she opened her eyes and blinked at him.
He was flaring his mandibles at her anxiously as he leaned over. "You all right?"
"Mmm, fine," she said putting in a mighty effort to keep her eyes open. "Just give me a minute."
Garrus relaxed slightly and ran a hand through her hair. "Don't push yourself, Shepard," he said softly. "Rest if you want to."
Somehow she felt she should be arguing against that, but she just didn't have the energy too. "...Fine," she muttered. "But could you.." she didn't finish the sentence since it would sound so childish to voice it, but it was Garrus and he seemed to understand.
"I'll be here," he said as he took her hand again. "Always."
"Thank you," she said outloud before she closed her eyes and let herself relax into sleep once more.
O0o0o0o0o
Garrus sat watching the rise and fall of her chest. Sleeping again, but at least this time it was just regular deep sleep. She was back. She would wake up, and they could talk again. No more worrying. She was here.
He let out a shuddering breath, trying to keep it together. He had been trying to be relaxed while she was awake and not show how much he had been worried over her. She had enough to adjust to without throwing his state of mind into the mix. The moment he had got a message from Chakwas saying that she was awake and talking he had set out toward the hospital. Even after coming thisclose to hijacking a transport to get here as fast as possible, he still hadn't arrived before Shepard had fallen asleep again. He hasn't left since then. He had to see for himself that she was all right, that she was still herself.
That had been everyone's unspoken worry. The doctors had done they best they could, but even they didn't know what was going to happen when she woke up. She had taken so much damage that there was always the possibility that whoever came out of the coma wouldn't be the Shepard they had known. There was so much that could have gone wrong, and he had tried his best not to think about any of it. Joker had brought up old Earth dramas where a character had woken up with amnesia as a joke, but Garrus had to admit that the mere thought had shaken him. Shepard forgetting everything? Even him? How would you deal with that?
Thankfully he hadn't been the only one affected by that thought and Joker had very quickly pretended the conversation had never happened.
At lest they wouldn't have to worry about that anymore. "It's over now," he hadn't meant to say the words out loud. The sound of the them in the small room made him jump and reflexively slammed his mouth shut, mandibles clinging tight to his face. He might be happy that Shepard was with him again, but he was not going to jeopardize her recovery by waking her up when she should be resting.
The door opened suddenly and be held back a warning snarl at the sound, just as Tali stepped inside.
"Garrus," she said, not sounding at all surprised at finding them there. "How is she?" her gaze switched to Shepard. Her mask blocked her face but he didn't need to see it to read the lines of her body and the anxious tone in her voice.
"You just missed her," he said, forcing himself to relax and keep her voice low. "She was awake for a while, but she's still weak. Apparently Chakwas was right; those little bits of machinery in her are helpful, but draining."
Tali grumbled something that sounded like a quarian curse but it was too indistinct for his translator to catch.
"But you talked with her? She's really all right?" Tali had her hands clenching together.
"She's fine," he said gently, "at least mentally. I think her asking about the Normandy and the crew was a good sign."
"Thank god," Tali sagged back against the wall. "Chakwas said that she was okay, but when she mentioned that Shepard didn't really remember some things that had happened and I got so worried. I tried to get out here as soon as I could but I kept running into problems and delays.."
"Look, Tali, don't worry about it," he said quickly. "Any memory loss she has seems to be centered around what happened right before the Crucible fired, and frankly, that might be for the best."
"That's something I'll agree on. I would rather guess about what happened with the Reapers than force anyone, most of all Shepard, to relive something like that."
"Then you'll have to help me keep the Alliance off her," he felt his subvocals shift down into a threatening growl as he spoke and it took effort to drag it back. He wasn't sure if that would wake Shepard or not. "They'll want answers, but I'm not letting them put that ahead of Shepard's health."
He knew he was being at least a little stupid about this. Maybe even very stupid about it. It was just that over the past few years he had seen what the Alliance, what even the Council had put her thought but was helpless over it. Now the whole galaxy owed her, and he was finally in a position where he could do something to make things easier for her, even if it was just chasing away politicians and paparazzi until she could do it herself.
"You know I'll help however I can," Tali said gently, then paused for a second. "How are you holding up, Garrus?" There was an anxious note in her voice, and it was only when he heard it that he realized his hands were shaking slightly.
He took a deep breath, evoking the same discipline he did to steady himself right before a shot. "I'm fine," he said as best he could. "Really. Today's just been a little emotional is all." He hadn't realized how just hearing her voice would get to him. Talking to her, knowing she was all right...he hadn't even said half the things he wanted to her. He didn't want to drag out something that emotional when she looked as weak as she did. Besides, his words had been stolen by just being able to talk with her, joke with her as if nothing had happened.
"I got to see her again, Tali," he admitted quietly.
Tali closed the few steps between them. "I know," she said as she laid a hand on his shoulder. "She's probably glad to be back too."
"Yeah," was the only thing he could think to say to that.
"You'll see her again soon," Tali said firmly, " and when she's awake again you have to call me. I will be most unhappy if you don't, understand?"
He relaxed slightly. "An unhappy quarian. Wouldn't want that. Don't worry, I'll call you."
He could promise that. Tali was right. Shepard would be with them again. He just hoped it would be soon.
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0
Shepard heard Garrus' voice. It was far off, but she'd know those familiar dual-tones anywhere. He was annoyed, even without seeing him she could heard that much although she couldn't tell who he was annoyed with. Sucks to be them, she thought cheerfully as silence fell.
Curiosity overcame her and she slowly opened her eyes. Same hospital room, but curiously she couldn't see the turian anywhere close by.
"Lillie?" That wasn't Garrus. It was a voice that was even more familiar to her than his.
She felt something in her chest lurch. "Mom?" she whispered in disbelief as she finally focused on the woman sitting in a chair on her right side.
The older woman seemed to sag in relief herself and smiled. "Welcome back to the world, sweetheart. You've been sleeping a long time."
Lil just stared at her mother wide-eyed. "What are you doing here, Mom?"
"What, I'm not supposed to come visit my daughter when I find out she's been through hell and back?" her mother crossed her arms and leaned back. At least she looked amused.
"I'm not saying that," she said quickly trying to force herself to keep still and not betray how hard her heart was beating. "I just thought you would be busy. Hackett told me you got promoted to Rear Admiral. I didn't think they would let you just walk away with everything so messed up."
"I have been working to get things running again," her mother said and slowly uncrossed her arms. "That doesn't mean I'm above pulling rank and heading over to see my injured daughter. Not a lot of people seemed to really object to it either." She chuckled. "Hackett grumbled somewhat but he didn't try to stop me either. I think he knows better than to try."
Lil wasn't at all surprised by that. Anyone who knew her mother knew about that stubborn streak that ran a mile wide.. "I wonder why," she said dryly as she tried to stop herself from fidgeting. Moving still hurt and used energy she really didn't have. Silence fell between them and she didn't know what to say to fill it. Her mother seemed confused, and Lil felt bad about this. It wasn't as if anything that had happened was either of their fault, and it would make things so much easier if she could just explain. Except, she had no idea how you brought up the fact that you had been dead to your mother.
"Lillie?" her mother's voice split the silence. She leaned forward, reaching out toward her. "Are you okay? You spaced out for a second there."
Lil jerked away automatically. Even though there was barely any room to move and the sudden action hurt, her intent was obvious. The hurt look on her mother's face was worse than the physical pain. "Yeah, sorry," she said, trying to ignore it. "I was just thinking. Were you..talking with someone else before I woke up? I thought I heard a different voice." Try to keep it calm, try to keep it casual. Easier than facing emotions she didn't know how to deal with.
Her mother sighed, as if she had expected the question. "Garrus was here until a couple minutes ago," she said. "He was already here when I arrived, actually. Then someone pinged him on his omnitool, he answered, and I chased him out when they started arguing. I told him I would throw him out myself if he woke you up. Apparently I should have just done it anyway." Her mother smiled at her encouragingly and Lil tried her best to smile back.
She wasn't sure how to feel about it. If things weren't so tangled up, then she might have actually laughed, and wished she could have seen that. Instead she felt she was just waiting for something to crack, for her mother to notice something was off and say something about it.
"So you and Garrus have been talking?" she asked, trying to keep it casual. Distract her, maybe. Lil had to admit the thought of her mother and her boyfriend talking was almost enough to distract her personally. She had never brought up her relationships to her mother and if Garrus had let something slip...
"Yes, we have," her mother shook her head, "talking quite a bit actually. I think it was harder for him to stay quiet."
Lil chuckled nervously. "Yeah, sounds like him. He's like that." She didn't know what to say after that. No, she thought quietly to herself, more than that. If she kept talking, she might say something that she would regret. There were so many things that she didn't want her mother to know, but so many things she wanted to tell her. She couldn't risk something more than she wanted to say slipping out.
Her mother looked concerned, and Lil could hardly blame her. The older woman seemed to hesitate for a moment, then spoken gently. "Look, Lil...I get why you're nervous about me speaking with him, but I'm not going to say anything about your relationship. You've never been one to take the easy route, so I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by you dating a turian."
For a few seconds, Lil thought she had been hit over the head. Although she had been slightly worried her mother could have picked up on something with her and Garrus in the same room for so long she hadn't thought it would be that accurate.
"Well, that's good to know. How they hell did you even found out about it anyway?" There had been rumors about who she was sleeping with; she knew that for a fact. She just didn't think her own mother would be the sort to believe them.
It just brought on a slight smile. "Vakarian told me himself."
"I am going to kill him," Lil said conversationally and tried to sink back deeper into her pillows.
"Does saying that I don't think he meant for me to overhear that make it a bit better?"
"A little," Lil admitted, plucking distractedly at the sheets. She swallowed, and hoped that she wasn't hooked up to anything reading her heart rate at the moment. "You really don't care?"
"I was a bit shocked at first," her mother admitted, "I wasn't sure what to think. I fought against the turians, remember." She shifted uncomfortably. "I'll admit, maybe I wasn't the most reasonable with him at first. But he's a good man Lillie, I can see that. He also cares for you, and he's made that very obvious." There was a pause, and her mother leaned forward. Lil drew back a little as the older woman studied her face for a moment. "But that's what he feels. I have no idea if you even feel the same about him."
The last words managed to shake Lil out of the feeling of stunned disbelief that had overridden everything else. "I thought you said you weren't going to say anything about my relationship with him?" She brought her hands up to rest on her lap. "Because really, why would you even be asking that if it were true?"
"I'm not trying to judge you, Lillie. I just want to hear things from your own mouth for once. I've had a hell of a lot of people talking to me about you, but I haven't had a chance to hear your own opinion for years. You know I prefer information straight from the source. Given everything else you've been though, can you really blame me for trying to make sure you're happy?"
Lil honestly wasn't sure what she was supposed to feel about that. Yeah, it was nice knowing someone still cared. She just never liked being question, especially by the woman who had raised her. "I'm an adult. I can make my own decisions."
"And I'm your mother. I worry. It's part of the job," her mother did draw back a little. "So, are you going to answer or leave me wondering?"
For a moment Lil did contemplate not answering but then she leaned back against her pillows and decided this was one fight she didn't want. "Whatever Garrus said, I'm echoing," she said as she closed her eyes for a moment, "I don't care what it was, and I have a pretty good idea what the words were anyway. He's been everything to me lately. No matter what's happened, what I've asked him to do, he's always been right there by my side. Imagining a life without him...that's not something I think I could do." She wasn't sure those words were right, or even if they made any sense, but they were the best she could come up with.
Her mother let out a breath of air. There was a creak for the chair, and Lil opened her eyes to find the older woman leaning back, watching her. "Then I'll keep my promise not to say anything else about it. I don't really understand the attraction but he obviously makes you happy. After everything you've been through I think that's the least you deserve."
"Thank you," Lil couldn't think of anything else to say beyond that and it drifted again into uncomfortable silence. She kept hoping something would happen. That Garrus would come back. That she would fall asleep. Even that the Alliance brass would come storming in demanding answers. Anything to get a distraction.
There was a sigh from the chair. "All right, Lillie, what's really going on here?"
Some part of her mouth went dry. She could feel adrenalin surge and her heart was bounding. Usually she felt like this at the beginning of a battle. "What do you mean? I think it's fairly obvious what's going on here. I'm trying to recover from being nearly blown up by a reaper."
"Not about that," her mother said patiently. "What's going on between the two of us? I don't need to be a psychologist to know that something's off, and has been since you got back." Lil felt herself freeze, barely breathing. Hannah Shepard did not appear to notice, but kept talking. "You used to at least shoot me a note every week or so to tell me how you were doing. Then I mourn you for two years, and you don't even have the courtesy to tell me you were back. Anderson had to tell me."
"I said I was sorry about that," Lil said shortly. "I was kind of busy killing Collectors."
"So, that meant no time for a note even?" her mother's voice was dry, although there was worry laced underneath it. "But that's why I went to see you when the Alliance dragged you in for trial. I wanted to see if you were all right. You acted like you would rather have been anywhere but there with me."
There was nothing Lil could think to say to that. She just looked down at her hands that were gripping sheets to keep from trembling. That...she remembered that. She hadn't been thinking about her mother until the older woman had walked into the apartment she was on lock down in. Then suddenly terror had gripped her. Few things scared her, but right now her mother was one of the things that could.
"Lil," her mother was saying gently. "I thought you freaked out because you didn't want me to know you were sleeping with a turian, but you're still acting like I'm going to take your head off. What's going on?"
Lil felt her mouth go dry again. She didn't want to drive her mother away. She just didn't want to talk to her either. Honestly, she wasn't sure what she wanted. Her stomach was twisting and she was just so close to saying she was exhausted and wanted to be left alone. "Nothing. I'm fine, Mom. Just tired."
That got a snort and the older woman crossed her arms. "Please Lilliana," her mother said in a warning voice she hadn't heard since she was a teenager. "I'm a bit insulted. Have you ever been able to successfully lie to me?" Then she hesitated. "Look if it's something I did, if something happened...just tell me. I'll listen. I promise."
There so many memories that called up. She swallowed around a lump in her thought. "It's nothing to do with you," she said quietly. "Not really. It's just...one of those things that's really complicated. I'm not sure how to explain it."
"I don't want to push you when you're like this," her mother sighed. "We can wait if you want. I'm just worried about you Lillie. I know how much pressure you were under. Just...you know I trust you, right? Whatever happened with Cerberus, or out there with the Reapers, I know you did the right thing."
Even without those words, Lil would have known that. Even the note she had gotten while chasing Collectors had said as much. Hannah Shepard had never doubted what her daughter was doing. That's why doubting her now made Lil feel as if she were the lowest. "Cerberus is a big part of the complication, yeah," she found herself saying. She felt her breath catch. She knew she should have shut up, she hadn't meant to say that. Shit, she must have been hanging around Garrus too much .
"I figured," was the unexpected reply. "I heard a lot about them. I knew they put you through hell before the Alliance dragged you back."
"Kind of the opposite actually," she said after a pause. The words were forced past a lump in her throat. Part of her brain was screaming that this was a bad idea. She should just stop and do something else...but she had never let her fears rule her before. This was different, yeah, but she didn't see the point in avoiding it now that they were this close. She was already at the edge. Might as well take the fall so she didn't have to worry about what could happen anymore. It couldn't be any worse than what the reapers had thrown at her...right? She felt light headed, and she knew she was trembling slightly. At least, if this went south the way she feared it would, Garrus was still be there. She hoped.
"Yeah, I heard that too."
That reply shocked her to the core and she froze. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that I asked Vakarian where you were while you were gone. He actually decided to tell me the truth." Her mother reached forward to touch the back of her hand. "I can't say much good about those Cerberus bastards, but at least they brought my daughter back to me."
It felt like the bottom of her stomach had dropped out. Suddenly she felt very light. Not dizzy exactly but something odd. "He told you? So you already knew?" For some reason that was once scenario she hadn't considered. Well, she had, but all the ones she had thought of hadn't been as nonchalant as this.
"I just said that, didn't I?" her mother smiled. "I guess that would be a little complicated to explain to your mother."
"That I'm a cyborg zombie now? Yeah, a bit." Lil could feel her voice shaking. She swallowed and tried to get some control back.
"Not exactly the words I would use to describe it," her mother cocked her head slightly. "Is that what this has been about? You not wanting me to know about Cerberus?"
"Yes," Lil admitted.
"Now I'm going to admit to being more than a little confused by that," her mother abandoned the chair to sit careful on the edge of the bed. "Someone tossed me a miracle and brought my daughter back to life. Maybe I would find it hard to believe at first, but I'm not sure why you would be scared of me."
"Because Cerberus didn't just bring me back to life Mom, they rebuilt me. Put me back together, and I wasn't sure how much of it was really me anymore. They might have told me I wasn't a clone, or that it would have been easier to make clone, but it was Cerberus. I wasn't sure I trusted that for a long, long, time. Sometimes I'm still not sure if I trust it." She tried not to look at her mother. Tried to keep from show exhausting this was. It would have been better for her to wait until she was feeling better, maybe. At least this way it could be over and she could actually rest, not worry about what she was going to do later on.
"You don't seem like a clone to me," her mother said quietly. "Although I don't think anyone could blame you for worrying about it."
Lil shut her eyes. She could feel tears at the corner of her eyes, and that was stupid. She had saved the galaxy. Why would this break her so much? It was just an irrational fear that had grabbed her first when she had seen her mother's note. She hadn't trusted, Miranda, the Illusive Man, or any member of Cerberus to be telling her the truth. If they were lying, then her mother was one of the few people that would be able to tell. As much as she loved Garrus and had a hard time imagining life without him, they had only known each other for a few years. Her mother had raised her, and helped shape what she would become. If anyone would be the one to know she was different than who she said she was, it would be her.
For a while, Lil had thought she had managed to get ride of her doubts but then her mother had walked in during her stay with the Alliance and all of them had been rushing back. She had been so terrified that her mother wouldn't know her, or she would be acting weird, or something else would be off. She has been more than half certain she was going to hear that she wasn't Hannah Shepard's daughter. Now, hearing her mother say almost the opposite was getting to her in ways she hadn't thought possible. A weight she hadn't even known was there had disappeared.
"Lillie?"
Slowly Lil opened her eyes. "..Thanks. Maybe now I'll start to believe it. Still not sure what else Cerberus did to me though."
"If they did anything, no matter what it might be, you're still going to be my daughter," there was absolute conviction in her mother's voice. "And believe me, nothing can make me change my mind about that."
Lil gave up trying to keep her tears back and just smiled. "Thanks, Mom."
Her mother leaned over, and gave her a careful hug. "Just make sure you're okay, Lillie."
Even though her arms still felt like lead, and it took almost every bit of strength she had left, Lil reached up to return the embrace. The pulled apart after half a second. "Still, glad you're here." The words took actually effort to form. Now that she wasn't running on adrenaline and not shaking, her body was letting her know that she had pushed things way too far. She settled back against the pillows, feeling amazingly heavy. Still, she tried to keep her eyes open.
She felt, more than heard, her mothers sigh and there was a creak as her weight left the bed. "Go to sleep Lillie," she heard her order. "People have waited this long to see you. Anyone who's worth your time can wait a little longer."
Lil tried to mutter an agreement, but exhaustion was pulling at her and she slipped into sleep before she could even complete the thought.
"I don't care what the council wants," Garrus growled not even bothering to keep his voice down anymore. "I still don't see the point of me talking with them. You're the Primarch, Victus. You're the one they should be dealing with."
"Primarch, yes," Victus' voice came from the omni-tool, "But not one of the biggest heroes the galaxy has at the moment. And, unless you forgot, you happen to be one of the most senior advisors we have."
"I didn't forget," Garrus said, pacing back and forth along the narrow stretch of corridor, "I just don't see the point in calling me one anymore. The only reason I was allowed that responsibility at all was because of the Reapers. You might not have noticed, but they're gone now. I doubt the Senate is going to be jumping with joy at keeping me as an advisor." He glanced back down the corridor he was in. There was the guarded double door at the end that led to Shepard's private hallway. This was the area that was near the official checkpoint, and he was close enough that he was able to hear the hum of activity from the main hospital area. This was not anywhere near where he wanted to be.
"I do think I remember something about the Reaper's falling, yes," was the dry response from his omni-tool. "That they are dead doesn't matter anymore. You proved that you could make capable final decisions. That made an impression on a lot of people, Vakarian. Couple that with how many we lost during the war, and you have more people than you think supporting you."
"Well, nice to know. Not that it really makes that much off a difference right now," Garrus glanced back toward the doors again. He should be back there, waiting with Shepard. He had promised her that. Getting dragged away because of politics hadn't been part of the plan. The only reason he even had answered his omni-tool was because it was Victus. If he had known it would end in an argument that would get him banished all the way here he would have just let his friend suffer in silence. "Do we even have a Council anymore, really? The Citadel is kind of, you know, destroyed."
"Damaged, not destroyed," Victus said, sounding like he was repeating something. "Sparatus and Tevos are both alive, although wounded. Both of them are trying their best to keep things organized and under control despite that. That's probably half the reason why Sparatus wanted you to come to the Citadel. He needs some sort of symbol to hold up. You were in C-sec at one point. He's trying to appeal to your sense of duty."
"Yeah, well, you can tell Sparatus to look for another puppet. I am not going up there. There are more important things for me to do down here." He had gone out into the corridor in front of Shepard's room, but when his subvocals had started raising enough that even humans could hear it one of the guards outside her door had coughed and suggested he was 'making a disturbance' with a glance at Shepard's room of course, to remind him the walls weren't that thick. He didn't know whether to be happy that they had found a set of soldiers that actually seemed to like Shepard or just feel annoyed at being scolded like a raw cadet.
He had listened to their advice, only for Shepard's sake, and gone into this hallway after that. At least he could agree about them warning him. He would rather shoot himself in the foot than wake up Shepard when she was still so fragile.
"All I promised Sparatus was that I would pass along his message and suggest you contact him," Victus didn't even sound surprised by his refusal. "I'll try to keep him off your back for as long as I can, but eventually he's going to get through himself. I understand why you want some time to yourself, but keep in mind that the galaxy is still spinning. People are going to want things from you, and I suggest you think about how you want to deal with them."
"I know, I know," Garrus sighed. "Just…not right now. I have things to do."
"If that's how you want to play it. Be careful, Vakarian. People are already spreading rumors about where Shepard is. Half the media already has a good idea where to look. I suggest you keep an eye out."
For some reason it didn't really surprise him that Victus knew the truth. "I will…and thanks for the warning," Garrus cut the connection after that and stood silent. He had been aware that they couldn't keep Shepard's state and whereabouts secret forever. Alliance Command was probably already planning an interrogation. The thought made him growl softly. Another reason to stay near her. He was sure he could make it very clear to any of them that he wasn't going to allow them to question Sheaprd for hours and hours. They could probably match any number of reports in sheer annoyance and persistence. Actually, they were probably worse because they felt they had a right to be so intrusive. He would just have to make sure they understood how wrong they were.
The comment Victus had made about paparazzi already knowing where Shepard was, that worried him a little. He wandered forward a little, just until he could see towards where the main lobby of the hospital was. The guards on duty where probably keeping an eye on who came through the doors as well but he felt just a little better checking for himself. There was no one immediately in sight that he thought might be part of the media. No cameras at least, although he was pretty sure the hospital staff would chase out anyone that obvious about what they were doing. The guards should be able to stop anyone else, or at least he hoped they were competent enough to do that.
Enough, Vakarian, he told himself, you'd better get back to Shepard before someone else decides to call you for something stupid. Well, stupid-er. He turned to walk away, but something out of the corner of his eye stopped him. It wasn't even so much a thing as the sense of a color. A very familiar shade of grey that stopped him his tracks. His head snapped over and he caught sight of turian talking to a nurse.
He knew that coloration and that build. That was impossible though, he knew she wasn't on earth at the moment. Or, at least she hadn't been the last time he had checked. There were plenty of turians here, it must just be someone similar looking to her. Then she turned, and he caught sight of her markings. He hurried though the checkpoint without even thinking about it.
"Sol?" he called out once he was close enough. She whipped around, her eyes wide.
"Garrus!" she limped over to him. He embraced his sister, a soft trill of relief escaping his subvocals for a moment before they separated.
"What are you doing here?" he asked, "I thought you were still with the fleet! And why are you on your feet? Dad said your leg was broken, and I know you don't heal that fast." He glanced down at the reinforced cast that decorated the lower half of her right leg from the knee down.
She waved his concerns away. "I'm not a child anymore, Garrus. It's healed enough to walk on now, or else I wouldn't even be down here. Do you really think anyone would have let me on a shuttle if I hadn't been cleared by a doctor?" She gave him a stubborn look, as if daring for him to call her out on it. The only reason he didn't was because their father had been the last person he remembered her being with, and he would have tried to haul her back himself if she hadn't been cleared. Anyone else Sol probably would have been able to charm into doing what she wanted.
"Okay, fine, you're walking now," he said as evenly as he could. It hadn't escaped his noticed that there were several people giving them looks. Ones that had more to do with annoyance at them taking up part of the hallway than anything else. Reunions, happy or otherwise, weren't uncommon here where the wounded were and one look at them probably told enough of the story that no one was curious. Happy, maybe, but not curious. Sol's plates might be half a shade lighter than his were, and her eyes might tend more towards grey than blue, but they had the same markings (which even humans noticed) and the same mandible shape (which only other turians seem to realize) to mark them as family. He gently grabbed her arm and steered her towards a corner, out of the way of traffic. "That still doesn't tell me what you're doing here."
"On Earth or here specifically? I have answers to both." Sol leaned back against the wall and flared her mandibles in a smirk. She was obviously trying to make the move look causal, but it didn't escape Garrus' notice that her position took some of the weight of her injured leg. His eyes flickered towards an empty chair that was a few feet away, but he knew better than to offer it to her or ask if she wanted crutches. It would just make her even more determined to prove she didn't need any help. His sister was too stubborn for her own good sometimes.
"Then why don't' you give me both answers?" he demanded. "I didn't even know you were coming!"
"Not my fault," she shot back, "I sent you a message and everything. I even got confirmation that it went through. If you didn't see it then it's all on you."
He couldn't find any fault in that statement and fought to keep his face blank. Okay, so he had been ignoring his omni-tool messages all morning, but if he had known that one was Sol's he would have….well, done what, really? Gone to meet her? That would mean leaving Shepard. It was his sister though, one of the few family members he had left. Could he have chosen between them?
He gave himself a mental shake and vowed to not worry about a situation that was already past. "Okay, I missed a message. You are here because…?"
"Because it was either come here or stay stuck up there and help Dad with organizational and political maneuvering," Sol snorted. "I was stuck on bed rest and missed what's probably the biggest battle this galaxy is ever going to see. I wanted to do something physical and at least see the battlefield. Besides," she added, "someone needed to come down here and check on you. It's not like you've been in regular contact or anything."
"I sent a note!" he protested, "I told Dad I was fine and asked him to tell you that! I don't need to be 'checked on' Sol. It's not like I'm that irresponsible."
"Oh, I know that," Sol crossed her arms and settled back with her mandibles flared in annoyance. "But the thing is, I keep remembering the first time I heard you say 'I'm fine'. It was that time when you broke you arm, were freaked and looked like you were going to pass out any second but kept insisting you were fine.."
"That was when we were kids!" he protested, "and I was trying to keep you from freaking out!"
"Exactly," Sol said calmly. "So forgive me if I doubt every 'fine' that comes out of you. Turns out that's probably a good thing. I went to the command center thinking that's where a big shot like you would be.."
"I'm not a big shot, Sol,"
"And," she raised her voice slightly and entirely ignored his protest, "I found out you weren't there. When I started asking around, someone there told me that you had been running off to the hospital at every spare opportunity." She reached out and poked his chest armor. "Fine my ass Garrus. What's the matter with you?"
It took several seconds for what she was worried about to make sense to him. "What do you…oh, spirits," he groaned. "Sol, it's nor for me, I swear." She just kept glaring at him and he sighed. "Look, I did take a few hits during the final battle, I'll admit that. Those are healed though, and if you ask anyone here they'll tell you I've never been a patient. I'm just here visiting a friend. That's it, I promise you."
Sol still had that disbelieving look on her face. "Visiting a friend. Every single day, every spare moment you have?"
"It's complicated," he started to say.
"Garrus!" his name interrupted his train of thought. He turned to find Tali trotting towards him. "What are you doing out here? Did something happen?" She stopped as she reached his side and finally seemed to realize he was talking with someone. "Oh. Sorry, am I interrupting something?"
Sol was giving Tali a curious look, and Garrus decided it was better if she didn't get the chance to ask questions. "Tali, this is my sister, Solana. Sol, this is Tali'Zorah. She's an old friend that served on the Normandy with me."
"It's nice to finally meet you," Sol said, "Garrus has mentioned you a few times, and I heard the reports. You have a pretty impressive reputation."
Garrus wondered just what reports Sol had been reading to make her say that.
"Thank you," Tali replied, relaxing a little. "I wish I could say the same, but for some reason Garrus doesn't seem to talk about his family much." Even though he couldn't see past her helmet, Garrus got the feeling that Tali was giving him a glare of her own.
"Sounds like him," Sol agreed.
"It's a little thing called privacy," he said after half a second. "I'm not required to share my life story with the whole world."
"No," Tali said, "you just babble about everything else. Constantly."
"I'm not that bad," he protested, and Sol snorted in amusement. "Well, maybe sometimes."
"Or constantly," Sol cut in. "he's been that way since we were kids."
"Why am I not surprised?" Tali sounded amused.
"Did no one inform me that it's 'Pick on Garrus' day? Because that would have been a good thing to know."
"Sorry," Tali covered the speaker on her mask with a hand. "But I think your ego can handle it."
"Oh, it can, believe me," Sol chuckled.
"Look, can we stop with the mocking already? I think that's enough mocking for today," Garrus said pleasantly. "Is there something you needed Tali?"
"Not really," the quarian admitted, "I was just going to visit Shep.." She looked over at Sol then and seemed to freeze.
"Shep?" Sol glanced back and forth between them and Garrus could just feel the gears turning in her head. She had always been far too good at reading between the lines and putting facts together. This wasn't exactly the hardest puzzle if you knew what to look for either. "This has something to do with Commander Shepard, doesn't it?"
Tali gave an outright squeak at that. "N..no, of course not!" she stammered, twisting her fingers together and glancing at him frantically. Garrus just sighed.
"It's all right," he said motioning to Tali to calm down. "We can trust her. I think Shepard would understand."
"So Shepard is here," Sol said settling back with a slightly smug look on her face. "There was a group of reporters outside that seemed to think she was, and you've got rumors flying saying that Shepard is secretly alive. I just hadn't found any confirmation. I should have figured things out when Garrus said he was visiting someone here. Shepard is the only one I've ever seen him that devoted to."
"Yes, she's here," Garrus said quickly. He didn't want Sol to think anymore closely than that. His relationship with Shepard was one thing he hadn't really opened up to his family about yet, and he wasn't sure what Sol's reaction to it was going to be. He would rather be somewhere a little more private than the middle of a hospital when she figured it out. "Alliance Command just thought things would be a little safer if we kept her location secret."
"Great job they're doing with that," Sol said. "She's the big hero. You think people would be able to keep quiet about it?"
"They did for a while," Tali pointed out. "It's just that lately, people have gotten a bit sloppy I guess. We just wanted to make sure she was going to be okay." The quarian was twisting her hands around each other again, and glanced off the side, towards the checkpoint.
"Uh-hu," Sol gave Tali a measuring glance. "And I guess that she's 'all right'? Or at least the rumors seem to think she is."
Garrus weighed his options before answering. "She was out of it for a while, but she's been awake and talking the last couple of days. Tired though, but the doctors say that will pass." Sol was going to be curious, and she rarely ever let go of an idea once she got it in to her head. If he answered her questions now, it would save having to deal with them later.
"If she only just woke up, I can think of a couple other reasons that the Alliance wanted her condition kept quiet," Sol mused. "It would be a hard blow to morale if they announced the galaxy's biggest hero was alive, and then she turned out to be a vegetable or something."
Tali tensed fingers tightened together as Garrus growled. "Sol!" in warning tones that seeped into his subvocals.
"Sorry," Sol had the grace to wince a little and duck her head. "I know she's a friend of yours. But hey, at least that didn't happen, right?"
"Right," Tali said, letting out a breath, " I've been trying to avoid thinking about it. They mentioned it to us too, but…."
"Tali," Garrus interrupted. "Could you go check on Shepard for me? She wasn't awake when I left her, but she's been out for a while and might be soon. She would probably appreciate having a friend around, and she hasn't had a chance to see you yet.."
"Sure," Tali looked grateful for a chance to get away for a bit. "I think she'll understand talking with family."
"Her mother's with her," he called after Tali as she set off, "watch out for that." Tali just waved at him before disappearing down the checkpoint corridor.
"So," Sol said as soon as Tali was gone. "Commander Shepard, huh? You're here everyday just for her."
"She's the closest friend I have, Sol," he said. Complete and utter truth even if it wasn't all of it. "Can you really blame me for being worried after everything that's happened?"
"Not really," Sol shifted a little trying to get more comfortable. Garrus fought the urge to reach out and help her. She wouldn't appreciate it. "You always seemed like you were close with her." Sol was studying him now, as if she were trying to come up with a theory. "Still, you're going to have to rip yourself away from her side at some point. I doubt Dad would be pleased at having to come all the way here."
Garrus felt any explanations he had been going to make about why he was staying so close to Shepard vanish from his mind. "Dad? Wait, is dad here?" He glanced around, half expecting his father to pop out of the ground at any moment. His heart was already speeding up, he could feel it. If there was anyone aside from Sol he didn't want finding out about his relationship with Shepard, it was his father. They might have made a sort of truce in their relationship and were slowly starting to repair things, but he didn't trust the tradition bound elder Vakarian to be anything less than displeased about his only son dating a human.
"Oh, he's not here right now," Sol said, snapping him back to what was in front of him and letting himself relax a little. "He'll be catching a shuttle down soon, though. Things have calmed down enough with the fleet that he feels he can afford to come down here and check on you. You did make it pretty obvious that you weren't going to go up there to see us. At least not right away."
"Wait, didn't Dad just send you down to check on me? Why is he coming himself?"
"He didn't send me to check on you," Sol said patiently. "I came down on my own because I was bored. Then I decided to check on you." She shook her head slightly. "Not that it really matters. I could try to send him messages saying that you really were okay for once, but he would probably still insist on coming to see for himself."
"I don't need him checking on me," Garrus found himself growling and tried to force his subvocals to behave.
"Garrus, it's not about that and you know it" Sol said sharply. "After everything that happened; Mom, the war, me getting hurt, he's just worried. He does care about you, you know. You're his son."
"I know," Garrus rumbled and went to lean against the wall beside her. "It's just complicated."
"The two of you are both rock-headed and stubborn, but you're still family. You can at least try to get along with him for a bit, right?"
"Riiight," Garrus wasn't entirely sure about that himself, but at least he would try. He owed his Dad that much at least. "I'll deal with him. It'll be fine." I hope.