Jack of All Traits
Chhaaaappptter Two: When the Insanity Falls... Asleep
Pov Change, NARRATOR
Jack was asleep.
Why is he asleep? Well that's what happens when IHJ (Inner Helper Jack) comes out, it is the only mind not really allowed out, why?
Because Bill is a B****.
Pov Change, Chrom
*Thump*
Jack just fainted! Is he ok? Fredrick just checked... nope he is ok (I'm just going to sit here typing words my brother doesn't notice are unrelated to this story at all, perfect plan... EHHHH)
"Uhh Milord? Jack seems to be a woman."(Super Important Note! Jack's Default might retain certain effects like gender, looks and objects until next change! Jack is now female until my ducked up mind decides for Jack to touch someone, and by touch I mean on skin, clothes don't count.)
Oh that's fine it wasn't like that before but I am glad he's alright wait, "WHAT!"
"You heard me correctly, if he was a man before he is a woman now."
"Anything else I should know?"
"She looks rather nice." What?
"Thanks for the info Fredrick."
"Just doing my job, Milord."
Special location change, Bill's domain
"All part of the hilarious not plan, great job jack"
Special location return, Jack's rank with Fredrick is now C, even if Jack doesn't know about that.
So Jack is a woman now huh? Intresting, when... uhhh she wakes up I will have to ask... her about that, for now I am going to go for a walk. Who knows maybe I will find whoever Jack was talking about before she fainted.
Club can't even handle the amount of random location changes right now.
Luc... I mean Marth sneezed, causing one of the attacking risen to cut off a large portion of her hair.
You know what screw this I am leaving you can take your location and point of view changes to someone else I quit. *door slam* Hmmm well I guess we were using that guy too much... Don't worry he will be coming back, Jack is waking up which means his/her point of view again, also since the IHJ incident he has been taught enough to speak normally, not to mention can reply to IHJ in ITALICS, SO NOW YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS "WRITER" FROM ALL THE OTHER FAB STORIES THATAREACTUALLYTERRIBLE, OUT!
And that is how you stop talking like a five year old, oh yeah and you're a woman now.
Thanks for the help IH, now that I think about it I sounded really stupid earlier, also I would have expected that side effect because I might have read through your files.
YOU READ MY FILES? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT THEY ARE MINE but its fine because it's our head.
Might I add the way your moods changed mid sentence is kinda scary?
It will probably get worse the more people we touch, now get up, undead creatures are coming soon.
Oh that's nice.
Why?
*Shiiing*
Oh. Ok. Now what are you doing.
*WOOSH*
HOW ARE WE GOING THIS FAST.
I DON'T KNOW!
HEY I HAVE AN AWESOME IDEA!
WHAT IS IT?
YKNOW I TALKED ABOUT THEM APPEARING THROUGH A PORTAL AND THAT OTHER GOD IS THE CAUSE?
YES?
WANNA JUMP THROUGH THAT PORTAL, TOUCH THE GOD AND GET AWESOME POWERS?
YOU MEAN LIKE BECOMING A DRAGON OR SOMETHING?
YES LIKE THAT!
WELL LETS DUCKING GO THEN, IS THE PORTAL STILL THERE?
YES THE PORTAL IS THERE WHY ARE WE STILL SHOUTING ITS NOT LIKE THE WIND IS STOPPING OUR VOICES WE ARE TALKING INSIDE OUR HEAD!
I DON'T KNOW BUT IS THAT THING IN THE SKY THE PORTAL.
Yes.
Good.
And as Jack, wielding the orange crystal sword jumped, she performed a magnificent frontflip while shouting
"DRAGOOONNNSSSSS"
There was also one risen who still magically had complete sentience, sadly it went through a really high portal, and fell but since it was risen it was ok. But strangely it also said,
"Not again."
Strangely this caused a falling pot of petunias that was next to a whale to sneeze while falling to its demise. Why did you get me to say that? I want a raise. And a birthday cake, WITH BUTTER ICING! Alright fine...
...In a destroyed world... Jack's Pov
Well isn't this place dreary there's fire everywhere but I see Grima lets go touch him.
Yes. Lets.
In another world entirely, in between reality and fiction
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU HIRED ME FULL TIME? I AM STUCK HERE? YOU WANT ME TO NARRATE ALL JACK IS DOING SO THEY KNOW WHAT HE ACTUALLY IS DOING? WHOS DOING THE POV SWITCHES THEN?
Me.
That's cute. Wait why are you on fire! Don't COME NEAR ME FINE I'LL DO IT!
Good.
Crazy little embodiment of victory wearing a hat...
'Scuse me? You wanna go? I can grant you power if you wanna fight...
No! No! I said nothing let's just get on with this story!
Back with Jack
"HELLO HUGE DRAGON FELLA!" Jack Screamed.
"WHO ARE YOU CREATURE? YOU SHOULD NOT EXCIST, YOU SMELL OF LONG FORGOTTEN GOD." Said Grima.
"ENOUGH TALK LEMME BOOP YOU" Said Jack as she touched Grima, which I don't understand how it would work because Grima is like a dragon the size of a ci-
*Class Change*
Name: Grim Jack.
Look difference: Manakete ears, still a woman, why? Meh Robin is a woman in this world, and thus if she is the embodiment of Grima wouldn't that mean Grima is a woman? Surprise...
Bonus Skill: Has dragon form that she can activate at will, ability to bring risen back on her side, dragon form can change size
Note: Grim Jack isn't evil, it just sounds badass.
*Class change end thing whyisthisstillgoingsto-*
Congrats we unlocked semi-ultimate power I am proud of us
All in a day's work, even if we just went through time so doesn't that count at like sixteen years?
"CREATURE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!"
"SHUT UP AND GIVE ME A SHARD OF YOUR SPIKES"
*crack* And so Grima lost a piece of its spikes, which Jack pocketed for later transformations which Grima didn't even feel.
*finger snap*
"BYE GRIMA THANKS FOR THE DRAGON POWERS I'LL SEE YOU IN A COUPLE YEARS!"
*a sound going through a portal would make I have no idea what this would sound like (if you are reading this out loud imagine what it would be like if this was the sound you made)*
So Jack went through the portal with her new Grima powers just in time for the end of the fight between the first risen seen by the shepherds.
Great so we got dragon skills now and a shard of grima, I thought of something else to do with that other than changing forms but that's for later.
Alright but where did we appear?
It seems to be... RIGHT ABOVE BLUE DAUGHTER AFTER SHE LEFT
"WELL DAMNIT I REALLY DIDN'T WANNA HIT THE FLOOR PAINFULLY AGAIN TOD-"
Its all over now, I challenge my fate as having nice feelings by telling you to review, did I mess up? WAS THIS COMPLETELY UNEXPECTED? It was for me I just planned for Jack to run past all the risen and chop them in half. But no touching Grima was a better idea. XD