January 29, 1816

Monday

It was more than a week before Victoria saw Diego again, though she had gone to the house as promised the next afternoon. Don Alejandro had met her in the parlor and gravely explained that the dramatic events of the evening before had been too much for Diego, and he had not yet recovered.

Victoria had had to pretend she was surprised by this, that she had not half-expected that Diego would be very ill today. She expressed just the right amount of disappointment and asked if she might have a word with Gilberto. Don Alejandro almost briskly informed her that Gilberto was occupied and they would let her know when Diego was ready for visitors.

She had been going to ask Gilberto just how badly Diego was doing – she thought, under the circumstances, he would tell her more than his father had—but this swift dismissal told her enough. Diego was very ill.

So for the next few days she had gone about her work, missed Sir Edmund, missed Diego, and forced herself to be polite to the new alcalde when he came in for dinner at the tavern.

On Wednesday evening, Victoria packed up a flan and went to try to visit Diego again. This time, when Pepe scampered off to see if Diego was ready for a visitor, it was Gilberto who returned. One look at his face made her shoulders sag slightly. "No?" she asked.

He shook his head, and, alarmingly, laid a consoling hand on her arm. "Not today. I'm sorry."

"Is he getting better at all?"

"Not yet." Gilberto would not meet her eyes.

"He's getting worse," she realized.

A pause, and then, "There is some congestion in his lungs today. It...has happened before. He has recovered from worse. Father Benitez is trying a new medicine."

"I want to see him."

"No."

"I have seen him ill before - Please - "

"He will not waste his strength looking brave for you. No. Perhaps in a few days."

Victoria closed her eyes, hating Gilberto De le Vega with a passion she usually reserved for alcaldes.

"I am sorry," he ground out.

She managed - just - not to slap him.

"I will give him your best." A dismissal.

"Thank you," she said levelly. "That is very generous."

The next day she caught the rumor – from Carlito at the vicarage, to Manny, a servant at the dry-goods store, to Pilar – that Father Benitez would be staying at the De le Vegas for a few days.

Victoria went on, going about her work, missing Sir Edmund, missing Diego, and managing to avoid the new alcalde.

But yesterday after Church Father Benitez had taken a moment to tell her that Diego was mending and she should come by the next day. That morning she put the simplest soup imaginable on for lunch and headed out to the hacienda as soon as the breakfast rush was over.

To her surprise, Pepe led her at once to the library, where Diego was sitting in a chair. He was wearing neither shoes nor a jacket, but Victoria had visited him when he was ill before and she had expected a dressing gown. Finding him in shirtsleeves made her grin.

"Forgive me for not rising—" he began with polite formality, but Victoria darted forward and leaned down to give him an indiscreet hug.

His arms came around her at once. "I'm sorry," he whispered in her ear. "I've given everyone a terrible fright. I'm sorry."

"I love you," she whispered back.

Diego went very still. He slid back, squeezed her hands tightly, and nodded toward a delicate arm chair beside the desk. "Pull that closer and sit beside me, Victoria."

There was nothing to do but retrieve the chair and sit beside him. He took her hand, and she realized that his hand was nearly as warm as her own. "I'm glad to see you are feeling better," she said carefully.

He said nothing for a long moment, and Victoria allowed herself to just enjoy holding his hand.

"I had intended today….to make you see reason," Diego said at last. "I hate the idea of ruining your life."

"I understand if you refuse to allow the wedding to go forward," she answered, although that was mostly a lie. "But I will not end the engagement—Oh, don't be angry! I'm not going to quarrel. But if I am not going to marry you, I am content not to marry anyone at all."

Diego breathed in and then out, very slowly. "This sentiment will pass if you do not cling to it."

"It isn't sentiment," she said more sharply than she should have. "I am being very sensible." Diego sighed and looked pitying at that so she explained: "Diego, you know every eligible man in the vicinity."

"Not every one, surely…."

She ignored his interruption, "And many men out in the wide world as well. So tell me where I will find a husband would ever be half so—so kind to me as you would? Who would not be greedy for my money, but would also not be ashamed to marry a woman who owned a tavern? Who would respect my business sense –or any of my sense - and not treat me like a child? Where would I ever find someone who would take the risks or make the sacrifices you have for me? No man I will ever meet could measure up to you."

"Don't be unfair," Diego said.

"I am not. I am not demanding you marry me. This is not an ultimatum. As long as I am engaged to you, I am not annoyed by other pursuers. And since we are engaged, I can see you more or less alone. We are still friends. Don't scowl at me. It is a very good solution! I don't need to get married. I can take care of myself. I have my business. And I am busy and – and—and satisfied."

"I see."

"But please don't tell me again to marry someone else. I won't do that. It isn't fair for you to ask."

"No," he agreed. "I won't mention it again." He looked very tired, and Victoria remembered he had been bedridden just a day or two before.

She squeezed his hand. "Shall I read to you?"

"Oh, no. Please. Tell me everything that has been going on in town. I feel like I have been…very far away."

So she brought him up to date on all the gossip until Felipe appeared to remind Diego that it was time to walk. "Will you join me in the garden? It is a little damp from last night's rain, but the roses are lovely?"

He switched from slippers to shoes and rose unsteadily. His grip on her arm was much stronger than politeness alone required, but he walked through the house and all the way to the well before he had to stop and get his breath.