Bonjour tout le monde! :D Here's chapter 5!
WARNING: THE CHAPTER HASN'T BEEN EDITED. I sent it to my beta one month ago and since that day, I haven't heard from her… (I decided to post anyway otherwise you will all forget about me! :p I'll update once I receive the corrected one.)
Reviewers: THANK YOUUU!
- To all who have answered my latest question, thank you very much! I'll do the best I can.
- Kathy: haha I didn't mean to scare you! I won't spoil but don't worry too much… ^^
- donnins23: So sweet! :) Thanks!
I hope you'll enjoy this chapter but once again, I remind you that I don't know how a US university works so I kind of turned it into a European one hahaha (and just in case you were still confused with that term, an Erasmus student is an international student, but only in Europe. In the US, I think there's something called the Magellan Network, right? I just don't want to change the title now, it's too late... Forgive me!)
Characters belong to the fantastic E. L. James.
Chapter 5 – Beautiful Eyes
We are Friday 7th. Tonight, it is the famous party. The party I finally accepted to go to since Kate, Cheryl, Paul, Olivia and Chad had asked me to come. Or rather: they demanded that I came. Furthermore, I said 'yes'. I remembered the incredible kiss Christian and I exchanged as if it was yesterday. But it is not the case.
Indeed, I haven't seen him for six days, and each second that passes increases my stress at the idea to see him again. Although I was more than relieved that nothing happened between him and the unconscious me, I had a knot in my stomach since he had left my room that evening –and honestly, I didn't know if it was shame, apprehension or excitement.
Shame because I was surely a horrible kisser since my experience is bordering on nothingness. (I am used to being the friend, not the benefit.) I'm dreading his reaction… what if he is despising or jeering?
Apprehension because events were slipping from me and I had the foreboding that my trip was turning into something too serious, too deep, due to him and all those mysteries which were kind of haunting me.
Excitement because I had to admit it: I was itching to see him again. Each time I was thinking of him, my body was like a volcano ready to explode. Even if I knew he wouldn't, I had hoped that Christian would text me and I hated me for that. He was so sweet, so perfect when he left that evening… Damn, why am I already so obsessed by him after only one week? This is crazy!
"Anaaaa, stop daydreaming, we're late!" Kate –who came back this morning- shook her hand in front of my eyes.
"Oops, sorry!" I came back down to earth.
This week, having my head in the clouds had become my favorite –undesirable- activity. He was always in my mind and it caused some damages like… my tray falling to the ground after I jostled someone in the refectory, my change of clothes forgotten in the cloakroom, and so on… Well, being away from him isn't a success for me. Being close to him isn't either.
However, when Christian wasn't monopolizing my brain, I did useful things. I visited the campus deeply, went to the sports complex several times and learned to know Kate's friends. I was slowly beginning to grasp their personality and I wasn't disappointed. They were all very sympathetic, although I still had some reservations towards Paul. I had tried to disregard my bad feelings but even if he was kind, it sounded odd. Maybe we're just not made to get along. (Given my inability to have male friends, the contrary would've been surprising.)
"Chad and Olivia are waiting for us outside, are you almost ready?" Kate asked.
She was unable to stand still. Obviously, partying was really her thing. She looked stunning in her tiny red sheath dress which matched with her glamorous lipstick. In comparison with her, I was feeling under-dressed in my electric blue summer dress –although she assured me I was looking perfect-, but something told me that Kate was always over-dressed.
"Yes, you can join them; I'll be there in one minute!" I smiled as she nodded and left the room.
How can she be so fast? She needed five minutes to be spruce whereas it wasn't even enough time for me to put on my clothes. I guess her job helps.
I fastened my hair in a high loose ponytail, applied a touch of gloss and put dangling earrings whose patterns brought out those on my round neckline. I then seized my little black shoulder bag and left the room, taking care to lock the door behind me.
When I stepped outside, I was bombarded by compliments from my new friends, now including Cheryl. Them speaking together created a hubbub but I succeeded in hearing the words 'cute', 'pretty' and 'sexy' (from Chad, and of course, it made me blush).
"Thank you guys, it's so sweet! You're beautiful too!"
Indeed, they all looked classy and radiant.
"Paul will meet us in the house," Olivia advised.
"Fine. Let's go to the party then!" exclaimed Kate.
Everybody agreed and we headed for the aforementioned Greek house.
The journey took more or less half an hour because we met different people on the way. I didn't know them but they seemed very excited, very friendly and also very drunk. They all warmly hugged me and some boys kissed me on the cheek. One of them, Aaron, had his right arm on my shoulders and his body heat was welcome given the coolness. He looked like a surfer: tall, suntanned, blond and brawny. Actually, he was pretty hot. He could've been as intimidating as Christian if he wasn't that cheerful and teasing. He made me at ease.
"Let me guess… a satin, oh no, a frilly thong!" he proposed, trying to figure out what I was wearing as underwear.
His suppositions made me laugh.
"Why frilly?"
"Ha HA! You don't deny about the thong! Little minx…" he knowingly smiled.
"Who tells you I'm not wearing XL flowered panties?"
"I know it because if I do this…" he stroked my butt in a flash. "... I won't feel any seam. Indeed!" he exulted while running away from me to avoid the punch he thought I would give him.
If he knew me, he would know that I'm too docile to do that unless I'm angry. So, I merely giggled. He came back next to me when he realized there was no danger.
"That's what I said: minx! You're beautiful," he said with a charming smile but his eyes were glassy.
"You're drunk," I stated.
The story of my life…
"I'm serious," he tried to convince me but his guffaw made him lose any credibility.
He began to speak –I mean, yell- with the others but I was already miles away. Even if I exteriorized rarely, I wasn't mocking-proof. I knew his blood alcohol level defended him but I couldn't help feeling hurt.
I looked up at the amazing sky full of stars and immediately found the Ursa Major. This constellation is my favorite; I associated it with God since it was always there, shiny and majestic. I suddenly thought about my life in Belgium… my family, my friends, my horse… I miss them. Hopefully, that feeling will ease when the academic year will officially begin.
Eventually, we went out of the campus and arrived in front of a huge white mansion whose entrance porch was impressive. Four columns proudly supported the three Greek letters associated with the fraternity organizer. Wow. Am I in a movie?
I congratulated myself for choosing ballerina pumps instead of high heels given the unevenness of the ground. (Kate, as for her, had no difficulty.) 'Security guys' checked our student cards and then let us enter.
The party was already in full swing: people were dancing like crazy and the room was crowded. Instantly, the lively music began to titillate my limbs. I love dancing. However, before allowing myself to move, I took one second to contemplate the place. This seemed to be made for soirées. There was a huge kind of pit surrounded by several podiums of different levels. A stage supported a big turn table and three over-active DJs, illuminated by spotlights and a giant screen hanging behind them.
Just when I thought that it was practically impossible to find someone here –which meant that I had a considerable chance not to cross Christian-, I saw him. He was standing with four other muscled boys on a platform and they were all looking at me. Their gazes were so piercing and unblinking that it made me shudder. Christian was by far the sexiest, especially under that weak lighting which made him even gloomier. Nevertheless, his attitude confirmed my doubts: he seemed disgusted and angry. So, shame finally won the tierce and I suddenly felt oppressed, not helped by the muggy atmosphere. What's wrong with me? Since my early adolescence, I had hoped that I had a problem only with Europeans but obviously, I was hated worldwide.
When nausea was about to overwhelm me, Aaron grabbed my arm and took me with him.
"Ana, come on!" he screamed.
Before we rushed into the mad crowd, I glimpsed bodybuilder-1, bodybuilder-2, bodybuilder-3 and bodybuilder-4 looking daggers at Christian while this one was staring at me with stupefaction. Reaching the bar to join the rest of the group wasn't an easy task but we made it. When she saw me, Kate –who was standing against the counter- caught my hand to attract me to her.
"What do you wanna drink?" she yelled in my ear to be heard over the loud music.
One could choose between beer and its derivatives, different kinds of vodka and tequila shots.
"Tequila, please," I ordered.
"Okay," she nodded. "Gimme ten tequila shots, two red vodkas and five beers," she asked the waiter.
Kate handed out the drinks; unsurprisingly, beers were for boys.
"Wait, is that all for me?" I asked her because she had given me three shots.
"Of course! You're not gonna drink only one shot, I won't let it happen!" she said with a large smile before raising her tiny glass. We drank in one go and then headed for the dance floor.
The music was so great that we didn't stop dancing for the next hour. I was very surprised when I heard a remixed version of Stromae's 'Papaoutai'. Like each time a Belgian succeeded in doing something big, I felt truly happy for them. My home country is so small that most of us feel close to our compatriots like we were personal friends. (I mean, when they become famous… Yes, only when they become famous.) It made me think of the euphoria created by the Red Devils at the FIFA World Cup… and our victory against the USA. The hate messages on Twitter even made the King quake, because having that world power as enemy isn't a good plan. (Note to self: avoid broaching that subject.)
So, as it was my turn to pick up the drinks, I headed for the bar humming and bouncing.
I was about to order the alcohols when someone placed their hand in my lower back. That touch. It electrified my whole body and let me speechless. The waiter was hanging at my lips, waiting for me to say something.
"A beer and…," began Christian's bass voice. "You like tequila, right?" he asked me.
I turned around to face him and my brain took a few seconds to reconnect. He was so handsome that I wondered if it was legal. My judgment was a bit distorted by ethanol but I wasn't drunk; I know when to stop. Unlike a lot of students nowadays, I don't need that to have a good time. By the bye, I didn't plan to order anything else for me… but it was impossible to turn him down.
"Yes…" I nodded.
"Three shots," he finished.
"But… I have to order for my friends…" I added shyly.
"Okay. What do they want?"
I quickly delivered the long list of drinks and began to look for the tickets in my little bag. He immobilized my wrist.
"It's for me."
He was smiling but I knew there was no possibility to negotiate, so I let him pay. Well, 'pay' wasn't the right word because the barman didn't demand anything. Since it is 'his' party, I guess he drinks for free.
I was looking at his angelic profile when a spot lighted up his face, and I noticed with horror that he was injured. There was a wound on his right eyebrow arch and a yellow-purple bruise covered his eye contour. He undoubtedly got a black eye.
"What happened?" I slightly touched his eyebrow.
I immediately removed my hand when he grimaced and flinched in recoil.
"Nothing important," he said curtly.
"Sorry…" I hastened to apologize.
When he took the floor again, his voice was softer.
"That's okay," he found new happiness. "Are you enjoying the party?"
"Yea, it's great," I somehow smiled but I couldn't help staring at his hematoma.
Who did that to him? Why? If it was during a fight, his opponent had to be one of these bodybuilders because given Christian's muscles, I was stunned that he could be banged-up. Or is it a girl? That thought should have made me ruthless but it didn't. My poor, you're already critically touched.
"You're beautiful tonight," he complimented me.
Oh mon Dieu. My heart skipped a beat. Has he just said I was beautiful? He had to be damned drunk. I had to be damned red right now. I wanted to ask him to repeat it but I fiercely bit my lower lip to refrain myself. Please, say it again!
"Tttt, don't!"
He released my lip with his thumb, liberating at the same time the flood of words I had held back.
"What?Areyouserious?Youaredrunk?PleasesayitagainThankyouSorry!" I debited at extra full speed in front of a dumbstruck Christian.
Putain Ana! My dignity hid in a hole and I really wanted to follow her but she refused categorically. I placed my hand on my mouth while he amusingly giggled, happy with his effect.
"You. Are. Beautiful. Yes, I'm serious. No, I'm not drunk," he calmly answered, a smile in the voice.
My embarrassment was so painful that I seriously wondered if ridicule couldn't kill, after all. An exit! Please, an exit! Richard The Caretaker should have a stool and a rope. Shut up.
"I have to meet up with my friends," I quickly told him.
"I'm coming with you."
As if he had seen my reluctance, he pointed his beautiful eyes at me like he was a vampire using his power to convince me. Well, I didn't know if he was a vampire but he definitely had that power. He got the better of me; I sighed and nodded. After all, the last time I capitulated when he said that, it was worth it.
I turned around and when he placed his hands on my hips, I almost dropped the tray.
"I follow you," he leaned over my left shoulder and murmured in my ear.
I breathed deeply and stepped onto the mob.
I thought I would struggle to make my way through the crowd, but it was without taking Christian's aura into account. People were moving aside to let him pass as if he was the President –whereas he's not even the President of the fraternity! I first thought it was fear but when I observed girls more attentively, I realized that it wasn't fear at all. It was something between adoration, desire and jealousy. I supposed it was due to Christian's hands –still on my hips- and it made me ill-at-ease; I've never meant to draw the attention on me! I ignored them as better as I could and didn't stop walking until I reached my destination.
When we joined the rest of the group, they all looked at each other with wide eyes and then focused on us, disbelieving. Please, not them! What did you expect? After one awkward minute, they grinned but it wasn't an affectionate smile. It was a why-the-hell-did-you-bring-him-here smile. Kate turned into the perfect bitch she could be and stared at him with scorn. Cheryl and Olivia adopted the same behavior but I could see their feminine solidarity wasn't strong enough not to succumb to Mr. Hotness Grey in less than two minutes. Gina, as for her, didn't even try to resist; she was literally dribbling in front of him. She makes me think of you. Thank you.
"Christian offers…" I said with a contrite smile, trying to slacken the atmosphere.
Paul, Chad, Aaron, Travis and Ryan loosened up first, too glad to drink for free.
"Thanks, man!" they exclaimed in unison, grasping their beers.
As I guessed, girls followed quickly. Except Kate, who shouted at me.
"Steele, with me."
Shit. Before following her, I glanced at Christian but he was already busy charming girls and getting on with boys. Kate pulled me far from them, in a nook of the room, and began to scream.
"Did you lose your head?! What is this asshole doing with us? Didn't you hear a single word I said last week?!"
Her eyes were on fire, she wasn't happy at all.
"Kate, I'm sorry!"
"No, you're not! What did this jerk say to make you lose any commonsense?! I thought you were smarter than that!"
Well, how to explain?
"Kate, calm down. I just let him follow me as he paid our drinks."
"And why did you let this jackass pay our drinks?!"
"Hey! Stop calling him every name under the sun," I defended him.
"I call this son of a bitch whatever I want!"
Okay, we're not home and dried yet.
"Kate, listen. There was no reason to refuse; he was very nice to me."
"Of course he was!"
"Perhaps he just wants to socialize and have a great time!" I ignored her remark and continued my plea; not sure why, though…
"That's not his style," she stated, categorical.
"Well, maybe he wants to change!"
"Change? Ha Ha Ha, let me laugh!" she said ironically. One point for Kate. Are you hearing yourself? You didn't find something more cliché than 'change'? "I remind you that θβΩ boys raped Valy! It may be him!"
"But it could be anybody else as well! Let him one chance," I asked her (okay, it might have seemed like I was begging her actually).
She thought of it during a few seconds and finally gave up.
"Okay, I give him one chance. But if his insatiable dick plays up, I'll kill you both!" she yelled, threatening me with her forefinger.
I really wanted to burst out laughing but her looking so serious had something terrifying.
"Don't worry, he will be proper," I reassured her, praying not to be wrong.
"He'd better," she grumbled.
When we came back to the group, they were taking part in a 'down-in-one' game. The goal was to drink five beers as fast as possible. Chad, challenging Aaron, had the advantage and eventually won.
"Yeeaaah!" he exulted, wiping his mouth with the back of the hand.
"It doesn't count, you cheated! I want my revenge!" Aaron invoked, bad loser.
"Fourth round: Christian against Chad!" Gina announced.
"It's unfair, he always wins!" Aaron complained, but seized his first glass anyway.
And what had to happen happened: Christian won hands down.
"Wooow! Five additional points for Christian, who's won each round he was involved in so far!" said Olivia with excitement. "Who will depose him?"
"Me," I volunteered.
What?! Trust me.
All eyes trained on me but I could only see Christian's. Beautiful grey eyes. I realized his name suited him perfectly. He offered me an astonishing crooked smileand a glint of defiance illuminated his look.
"You're not serious, Ana!" Ryan guffawed.
"Cheryl tried, and she didn't even finish her first beer!" Travis added.
Christian didn't say anything, but his stare betrayed the fact that he was thinking the same. Mr. Alcohol and me succeeded in looking at him intently, affirming that I was ready and totally earnest.
"Well, let's go then. Fifth round: Christian against Ana!"
"I will not let you win," Christian warned me.
"Me neither," I replied confidently.
He screwed up his eyes but we both seized our first drink in the right hand and waited for Gina to give the start signal.
And what had to happen happened: I won hands down. Never underestimate a Belgian at this kind of game. Well, 'hands down' is maybe a bit exaggerated. He finished less than one second after me and if we had had to continue he would've won because I have no endurance and I kind of cheated since I was born in a country where beer is a specialty but… this time, I won!
"Baaaaaam! Well done, Ana!" Chad cheerfully congratulated me, instantly copied by the others but Christian.
Kate was jubilating more than ever whereas my sexy opponent was looking at me, immobile and incredulous.
"You avenged us!" Aaron felicitated me. "You suck, Grey! She made short work of you!"
The concerned party was unnaturally calm and even if I knew Aaron was kidding, that fact that Christian didn't react to the criticism scared me. Although I didn't know him very well, I could say that he was likely the type of guy to take it badly. Furthermore, I didn't know how many beers he had already gulped down… As for me, I realized that my current number of ingested drinks was largely exceeding my habits. Nothing too serious, –I was just more joyful-, but I promised myself not to drink anymore tonight.
Christian moistened his lips sensuously and the expression in his eyes changed from competitiveness to fiery desire as he was getting closer to me. Since when is being beaten at a stupid drinking game an aphrodisiac?! He's incredible… et j'adore ça!
Once he was in front of me, he silently examined me, dwelling on my bust and then on my lips. When I decided to itemize him as well, I signed my own death warrant. Watching him ogling me was absolutely erotic. His look was so penetrating and his expression so crude that I thought my whole body would ignite from the inside. I was so focused on his body that I barely saw the others leaving to reach the dance floor.
Five minutes later, the tension between us was so unbearable that I decided to speak. Actually, I apologized, because I was feeling like I had to. Oh my God, you're a lost cause.
"Sorry," I told him, however struggling to hide my smile.
"Fair point. I'm impressed."
He offhandedly presented his right hand for me to shake it. I naïvely and spontaneously placed my hand in his and before I could say 'Oh!' he was standing behind me, my back against his torso.
"I don't like to lose," he murmured in my ear, enunciating every word.
Breathless, I didn't move. (But he was holding me too fiercely to, anyway.)
"You owe me something. A dinner. Next Monday?"
Typical Grey rule. And of course, that wasn't a real question. Since he would never have released me if I had resisted, I gave in once again.
"Yes," I agreed.
Pardon?! Are you taking yourself for Jim Carrey in 'Yes Man'?!
Indeed, my answer had the power to free me after he briefly kissed me under the ear. His lips on my skin made my head spin. Christian + booze = nothing good.
"Ana, come on! It's time to daaaancee!" Chad called out to me, which made me recover some consistence.
"Yep!" I joyfully nodded.
Before following him, I turned towards Christian and saw him frowning, seemingly vexed.
"What?" I asked.
"He calls you Ana."
"That's my name…" I pointed out to him.
"No, it's Anastasia Rose Steele. You've never told me to call you Ana."
Well, that was exactly why I didn't want him to call me Ana. The way he was pronouncing my entire name was totally obscene and it woke up the resident butterflies of my stomach. Nevertheless, how does he know my middle name? One more question on the list. Grey, be ready for a true questioning on Monday!
"Please, call me Ana," I sarcastically replied, rolling my eyes.
A lightning crossed his eyes, he fiercely caught my jawbone and then kissed me in a flash, as bluntly as impulsively. Bloody Hell.
"Don't be impertinent. I hate that, Ana," he reprimanded me with a scowl.
His threat had no effect on me; I was in shock. As were their habit, his lips let me shaken: my heart was beating like crazy and my legs instantly became jelly. But his words were in contradiction with his acts; a kiss can't be a punishment, no matter how rough it may be. Truly, this man must have too many estrogens to be that complicated. (I really wonder where they're hidden though.)
I cautiously glanced around, dreading a potential –but inevitable- reaction of Mr. Hotness' groupies. Surprisingly, nobody seemed to have seen what had just happened. Although it lasted a very short time, I was sure it was real. I licked my lips to check it and indeed, I could savor Christian's intoxicating taste. My whole body began to combust and it was only a matter of time for me to be no more than water and carbon dioxide. Furthermore, my reason had to be as stunned as me because she didn't say anything like 'This bastard isn't your master! He has no right to tell you how to behave!'.
I recovered when Christian's fingers –still immobilizing my face- became painful. Unexpectedly, there seemed to be a threshold from which his touch didn't release dopamine anymore. As he still appeared to be angry, I apologized.
"I'm sorry…" I struggled to articulate and looked down.
"No, look at me," he ordered, holding my chin higher.
I wanted to listen to him but his posture was clearly commanding me the opposite. Contradictory signals. Again.
After weighing the consequences, I decided to follow his voice. His beautiful silver-grey eyes didn't make me regret my choice: they captured mine and made me forget the Universe.
"I'm serious. If you don't want to get into trouble, avoid being insolent. Did I make myself clear?"
He was speaking very distinctly and his words were full of meaning. However, although his tone was menacing, the wrinkle which was crossing his forehead and his frown eyebrows were betraying something else. Apprehension? It was difficult to decipher given the colorful spotlights that were randomly and discontinuously lighting his face. (But it's not like he was an open book anyway.)
Actually, I was totally lost. The only thing I knew was that yes, he made himself clear. But why does he make a point of honor to tell me that and make sure I understand at 2am during a student party?! Instead of philosophizing about that question, I added it to the list for Monday interrogation.
"Yes, very clear," I finally answered.
After his pupils assessed mine to detect a potential lie, he released my chin and my head fell heavily. I passed my right hand on the nape of my neck –sore because of the prolonged twitching- to try to ease the pain.
When he noticed my ache, an imperceptible lightning of worry crossed his cloudy irises and he tenderly kissed my jugular vein. I didn't try to interpret the signification of this buss because it probably had none. Or in any case, not an obvious one. This man is impenetrable… However, my muscles relaxed as if by magic.
Yes, this man is definitely impenetrable.
During the next hour, us girls danced non-stop. Sometimes provocatively, sometimes crazily, sometimes sensuously, sometimes composedly, but never very seriously. We were having a great time.
Boys were calmer, nodding in rhythm but that was all. And this is great, because if there's something I dislike, it is boys who dance. I mean, the guy in Step Up is obviously okay, but the ones who gesticulate like fools are pathetic.
Christian didn't attempt anything to get closer to me again, but he was constantly watching me. I would've loved to have had enough shots not to care about his stare anymore, but it wasn't the case. One can't say that he didn't try to help me since he almost proposed me a glass every three minutes, but I've declined each time so far. A promise is a promise. However, even if it didn't reduce their pressure, I was beginning to ignore his beautiful eyes like a pro.
I was (finally) feeling (a bit) comfortable with Christian until Beyoncé struck up her explicit song 'Partition'. The French part sent me impure thoughts that made me blush and I unfortunately didn't succeed in chasing them before Christian noticed it.
"Tell me what she says," he asked me suavely.
"I'm sure you have an idea," I retorted.
"Oh I do; I just want to hear it from your mouth," he admitted, brushing my lips with his thumb.
I had to force myself not to lick it. He extended his touch and was now fondling my neck, tracing my jugular vein.
I needed all the courage of the world but I finally managed to think straight and translated.
"Do you like sex? Sex, I mean, the physical activity…"
I stopped. No, impossible. I was so febrile with his hands on me that I was wondering if I could actually survive this.
"Continue," he ordered.
Okay, possible.
"Coitus… you like that? You're not interested in sex? Men think that feminists hate sex but it is a very stimulating and natural activity that women adore."
Christian first lustfully stared at me and then a small smile took shape on his face; as for me, I immediately looked down.
"My answer to all your questions is yes."
What? My… No!
"Those are not my questions!" I promptly looked up, outraged.
"Well, I was sure to have heard you asking me if I liked sex…" he teased me.
Tom is back! Aaaargh, I knew it already but this time it is crystal clear: I hate cats!
"Beyoncé asked you if you liked sex," I stood up to him as much as I could.
"I'll show you one day… how I like sex," he murmured in my ear, ignoring my previous comment.
His tendentious words killed my repartee and made blood rush to my cheeks. Damn it! Although he was perfectly aware of his impact on me, he adopted a nonchalant stance and placed one arm around my neck, like we were close friends without any ambiguity. But both assumptions were false.
I was getting tired of our stressful and embarrassing conversations. Was it possible to have a normal discussion with this man? It was too much. I wasn't at ease anymore and it was spoiling the party. I wanted to dance like a fool and laugh with the others but Christian was always there, suffocating my freedom and my insouciance. But he wasn't the only one. People around us were constantly surveying our movements, like paparazzi ready to take to latest scandalous photo. Mr. Hotness was an expert at ignoring them but I obviously needed more experience because their gazes were slowly driving me crazy.
I had to go. I couldn't count on Kate because it was my entire fault, so I constructed an evasion plan on my own. Since I had never been a very creative person, I drew my inspiration from books I had read and chose the toilet-trap.
"I have to pee, I'll be right back," I informed Kate, who was next to me.
Kate looked at me suspiciously and when she smiled knowingly, I knew she had uncovered my underlying motivations.
"Okay, we won't move," she said naturally.
I silently thanked her and checked up on Christian but he was too caught up in debating politics with Travis that he didn't see me leaving the group.
I took my time to reach the restrooms in order not to draw attention on me but once inside, I quickly locked myself in a cabin and breathed. He can't enter here. Moreover, there's an exit door which enables me to avoid the main room. Perfect.
Despite the door and the loud music, I managed to catch a conversation between two younger girls.
"Have you seen Christian Grey?"
"Who hasn't?! He's sexy as hell!"
Ugh… I cannot do other than approve. My body was already begging for his proximity.
"Totes! By the bye, Ellen told everybody she'd have him in her bed tonight. She's such a slut."
"Not a scoop. Being intelligent and sleeping with Grey aren't compatible things. But it seems like she has some competition…"
"Yeah, there's that girl he's been sticking to like glue since the beginning of the party. You know her name?"
"Nope…"
Are they talking about me? Of course they are! There aren't two Christian Grey, and the reason you're hidden here is his obsessive tendency to follow you.
"That's surely a bet because I don't know what he could like about her; she's so fucking banal."
"That's simple: he likes her pussy!" she concluded and they both burst out laughing.
I held my breath until I didn't feel any presence.
As I can see, rumors are rife. People are incredible. Why do they always have to find a reason for anything others do? Why do we have to have a reason for anything we feel? 'Bulletproof Picasso' from Train came to my mind and I rapidly forgot these existential interrogations. It was way too late to focus on anything.
Slightly groggy, I went out of the cabin and headed for a sink to refresh my face. The cold water did me good; clearing my thoughts. I was looking at myself in the mirror when I suddenly noticed Christian –standing in the door frame, arms folded. I could've spent hours describing his innate charm, his sexy jaw line, his unquestionable masculinity… if I wasn't dumbfounded by the traitor Kate was! I can't believe it! Rrrrr!
Anger-stricken, I rushed to the other exit to shake him off. Or at least, tr… You got it; once again, he pre-empted me. He grabbed my bicep to stop my movement.
"You're in the women restrooms, you mustn't be here!" I yelled.
"I don't care," he replied.
His look was determined and his hold firm. What to say? What to do? I was lost, and tired, and annoyed, and irrevocably attracted by him. My brain wasn't able to focus on anything else than his powerful hand on my arm. My skin in contact with his warm palm seemed to be straight connected to my –now wet- privates and it was exciting me more than it should have. When I sincerely contemplated to ask him to fuck me hard against the cobbled wall, I realized I really needed to go out.
"Can we… just… go out?"
"Yeah, sure," he immediately nodded.
I knew a 'we' would work better than an 'I'. In fact, he's quite easy-going, as long as you do whatever he wants… Okay, he's not easy-going at all.
He released me, and destabilized by the intense feeling of gap his touch had let, I took a few seconds to notice that he was waiting for me to precede him. Why does he have such an addictive effect on me?
I uncertainly stepped into the darkness and he followed me without a word.
Barely outside, I sat directly on the ground and folded up my knees against my chest. The cold wind made me shiver but breathing cool air had never been so welcomed. There was no one here and only the muffled sound of the music which exuded from the building was disturbing the quiet. I closed my eyes to ease my eyelids.
"Are you okay?" Christian asked.
"Yes, I'm just tired."
"Then we should go back to Hamilton."
"We?"
He sighed.
"Will you always ask me why I have to accompany you?"
"Until you tell me why, yes."
"I've already told you it was too dangerous."
"But why?" I insisted. "Does it have something to do with Valentina?"
He grit his teeth and then looked away.
"I don't wanna talk about that," he said curtly.
"And I wanna talk about that!"
I was stunned by my own boldness. There wasn't the shadow of a doubt: Mr. Alcohol was behind this sudden daring. Docile… I remembered his words and realized I was definitely disobeying. Moreover, the fact that he didn't want to speak about Valy's disappearance should've worried me instead of pissed me. Is he really involved? It made my blood run cold.
"I thought you were tired!" he raised his tone, which made me startle.
I curled up a bit more and placed my right cheek on my knees, looking away from him. Who does he think he is? My father? My brother? He's nothing! I wanted to snap him and yell 'SCREW YOU!' but unfortunately, my state of inebriation wasn't high enough to surpass my fear and my submissiveness. If he's like that with every girl, then I'm surprised he didn't get more than a black eye!
When I was shaking so violently that my teeth were about to chatter, he talked.
"You're going to catch a cold if you stay here. We should whether go back inside or to Hamilton."
His voice was now low and smooth, as if he was trying to reassure a frightened animal. It's almost that.
I slowly looked up and stared at him a few seconds before seizing the hand he was holding out to get back on my feet. As usual, an electricity discharge occurred when our bodies entered in contact. Note to self: avoid touching him under the rain.
Since I wasn't motivated anymore, I chose the second option. My feet were hurting; I wanted to bury myself into the pillows and blankets of my loving bed so bad.
So, I didn't say anything and unhesitatingly headed for the path we took a few hours ago. Christian needed exactly one second and a half to notice I was leaving without him. I didn't care about him. He wanted to follow me? Alright. I was just going to pretend he wasn't there. Easier said than done. Don't hack me off!
As if he knew I was only tolerating his presence, he was walking aside of me, mute, hands in his pockets. It was really hard not to look at him. Actually, it was torture. But I had to resist, otherwise it would feed my starving desire, and I might not be responsible for my acts anymore.
I was experiencing the famous adage 'suis-moi je te fuis; fuis-moi je te suis'. Indeed, the situation had backfired: he was the one ignoring the other best. Each time I quickly glanced at him, he was impassible like he was doing a boring job. I was dying to hear his sexy husky voice again, but there was no way I was going to start the conversation. I was dying to kiss him again, but there was no way in hell I was going to be forward.
And if the girls were right? And if it was a bet? And if he was forced to rub shoulders with me? The awful plausibility of this option created a knot in my stomach.
Ana, be strong. Only a few tens of meters left. I was already able to see the high red-bricked chimneys of Hamilton Hall.
When we arrived in front of the entrance door, I stopped and waited for him to leave.
"You can go now…"
"Sure, I can."
Oh no, there we go again.
"Christian, go away," I said wickedly.
I hadn't a lot of sangfroid in stock anymore.
"What if I don't want to?"
"Then stay here!" I almost shouted.
I violently opened the door, hastened inside and then run to my bedroom. Thank God, it's located on the ground floor.
I heard Christian's steps behind me and it triggered a flood of adrenaline. I was about to close to door when he interposed himself between the door and the frame.
"Ana, wait!"
Since his strength wasn't something you can easily ignore, I waited and he locked his molten grey eyes in mine. Admit it, you just can't refuse him anything. Yes, it's true, but I was also curious to know what he had to say that was so important.
But he didn't say anything. And he didn't need to say anything: only his smoldering look could make my heart race and my panties wet. He might have put out feelers initially, but he was definitely –and successfully- trying to persuade me now.
My vulva tensed in anticipation and of course, that didn't elude Christian, who immediately swooped on me like a predator. Our lips collided as violently as my back hit the wall. In no time, his tongue was in my mouth, dancing with mine. He placed his right leg between mine and immobilized my wrists above my head with one hand while the other began to go all over my body. He didn't beat about the bush and immediately started with my breasts, kneading them over my dress. Under his proficient thumb, my tits pricked up instantaneously. I was struggling to stay quiet as he was urgently stroking my thighs under my little dress. Soon, he reached my thin thong and lewdly growled in my mouth. He began to play with it but the underwear didn't resist more than two seconds, which extracted a moan from me.
At first, I was happy that he was wedging my arms, because I didn't really know how to please him. But this statement wasn't true anymore. As and when he was deepening his kiss and caresses, my instinct made me crave to touch him too. I tried to move my hands but he prevented me from doing so.
Instead, without warning, he introduced one finger in me and it got a whine out of my throat. The feeling was strange but astonishing; I was becoming aware of new organs in my body. It was like all my nerves were solicited at the same time, casting doubt on all my brain's landmarks. But most of all, it was absolutely awesome.
He blurted a muffled groan out, which was scandalously erotic.
"My God, you're so narrow!" he murmured against my lips.
It was so stimulating and intense that I was wondering how much time I would still be able to support it. He was so skilled, kissing me while utilizing his finger in the best way. No doubt, he perfectly knew how to proceed. Who said men couldn't do two things at a time?
After several seconds of exquisite pleasure, he began to insert a second finger.
Suddenly, he started back with a stifled curse and quickly removed his hand. My shaking legs, unable to support me on their own anymore, gave way beneath me. Fortunately, Christian reacted in less time than you need to say it.
"Wow!" he exclaimed while recapturing me in a flash.
He placed me on the edge of my bed and squatted in front of me. I had the impression to be five years old.
"There," he murmured soothingly. "I am sorry. I… huh… I didn't want to drop you, I just…" he began stuttering. (Yes, this is happening again!) "You're still a virgin…" he point-blank stated, disbelieving.
C'est pas vrai! I brusquely came back to earth. How can he know it?! How did he… feel it? I mean, I hadn't anticipated tackling the subject before the hypothetic day when we would be about to do… it, which is not today.
Now I wasn't feeling good at all; I was ashamed and awkward. The last thing I wanted was suffering mockeries or even pity. I couldn't. Not anymore.
I blinked back tears nervously, avoiding his wondering look.
"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.
What?! Why should I have told him? How was I supposed to know he would be able to discover it without going further? Let me remind you that your hymen is a thin membrane which –without being ripped- allows the passage of… For God's sake, SHUT UP!
At least, he didn't seem jeering and during a very short moment, it eased me. But I was suffocating, I had to move. I stood up abruptly and avoided Christian who, surprised by my spontaneity, almost lost his balance. I reached the door and held it open.
"I'm sorry… Thank you for taking me back here. Please go now," I begged him.
He was slowly picking himself up, looking at me with a mix of incomprehension and trouble. The wrinkle reappeared on his forehead as he was drawing closer to me.
"Ana," he called me out to capture my attention. "Are you feeling guilty for being a virgin?"
No, no, no, I'm not! I'm not feeling guilty! I, I… I… I hate when he reads me like an open book.
I sighed. Why does he always need to interpret everything? To understand everything straightaway? It's past 3am!
"I didn't know it was important…" I answered shyly. Liar.
"Ana, I was about to… I…" he stopped, shaking his head. "There's no way I'm not gonna deflow…" he continued, flabbergasted.
"Yea of course," I immediately cut him short. I didn't want to hear that. "I know you won't I know you don't want to I'm not expecting I just…" I debited in one go.
"Anastasia," he silenced me by placing his forefinger on my lips. "I am not going to deflower you with my fingers."
Oh. Which then means that he has the intention to take my virginity? I frowned at him, not sure to properly understand.
Without taking his eyes off me, he slowly closed the door.
"Lie down on the bed," he gently told me, but his tone left little room for negotiation.
However, it didn't brake my opposition reflex.
"But I…" I began.
"I don't want your legs to let you down again," he interrupted me.
Although I was completely terrified, my need to obey won the day and I half-reluctantly half-blithely reached the aforementioned bed.
He joined me on the mattress and resumed the exploration of my scorching body.
I couldn't believe that the famous Christian Grey was in my bed, glorifying my body. After a few minutes, I wasn't afraid anymore; I was confident. I didn't know what would happen after and actually, I didn't care since it was almost beyond my control. I had always said that I would 'make the boy wait' but now that I was confronted with such a situation, I suddenly became a sheep. Christian, as for him, wasn't the ravenous wolf he was ten minutes ago: he was the shepherd. Indeed, his gestures were softer; he was more attentive and caring. He was the Christian I met when I woke up in his room. There was still this fiery desire in his eyes, but they were also imprinted with kindness. Mon Dieu, que j'aime aussi ce Christian…
His mouth attacked my neck, –kissing me softly-, while his hands were titillating my nipples. This time, he let my arms free, so I touched him everywhere I could, taking care to avoid his painful eyebrow arch. I ran my fingers through his hair –sometimes pulling them- and then on his impressive shoulder blades. I automatically scratched them when he grazed my privates. He was fondling me like I was a tiny fragile birdy and it triggered a tingle down my spine.
His mouth found mine again and he slightly bit and then sucked up my lower lip as his hands brushed against my clitoris. It electrified my whole body which shook violently. My hips spontaneously rose to enter into contact with his stuck erection, encouraging him to intensify his caresses.
He broke our kiss and stood still, his grey eyes anchored in mine. His stare was intense; it was one of those Grey-certified looks that make me melt. I voluptuously bit my lower to exhort him to continue and it had an immediate effect on his right hand, which resumed its job with more fervor. In no time, I began to sweat under the effect of his insistent action on my sex organ. And he continued. His pupils were dilating as my excitement was growing up. And he continued. I was conscious of my vulnerability under his lubricious gaze, and it increased my lust tenfold. And he continued. More… And I was hot… A little more… And my heart began to race… A bit more… And I began to pant… Even more… More, more… And I imploded. OUI!
When the orgasm overwhelmed me, my back arched uncontrollably and I closed my eyes. It was like a truck full of pleasure had savagely struck me, making my stomach's insane butterflies blow into thousands of shining flakes. Oh God. It was so good. I think I can say it: all parts of me were in seventh heaven. (My reason, as for her, was desperately chasing away the vicious Mr. Idealization who was trying to poison my brain, taking advantage of the complete mess my mind currently was.)
After the last spasm had shaken me, Christian abruptly ceased touching me and it let me speechless, depriving my lungs of oxygen. I opened my eyes to find his beautiful face.
He was looking away, immobile with the jaw tensed. He was over me, leaning on his forearms which were on either side of my head so that I was in the perfect position to contemplate his wickedly magnificent profile; I could've admired him during hours without getting bored.
"Christian…" I began. (I wanted to say something but suddenly forgot when the smell of his fragrance reached me.)
At the sound of my voice, he closed his eyes and clenched his fists. He seemed deeply torn whereas I couldn't even think anymore.
"That's enough for tonight," he whispered between his teeth.
He then jumped out of the bed, so speedily that my dazzled eyes didn't succeed in following.
No, come back! Again, again, please! My inner nymphomaniac wanted more but my body was too weak to hold him back; I was exhausted and irrevocably shot up because of dopamine.
I thought he would leave running but he stopped after three steps, pinched his nose bridge and slowly turned around.
"Have a good night," he cautiously leaned above me and kissed my forehead.
He silently left the room and I sighed in wellness.
That night, it was an absolute certainty: I was going to dream about Christian Grey. Christian Grey and his hands and his voice and his hair and his tongue and his beautiful eyes.
Did you enjoy it? Please feel free to let a lot reviews, it illuminates my days! :D
See you soon for chapter 6 (restaurant!)…
Thanks for reading! xoxo