CHAPTER SIX: The price of alcohol
Saturday/Sunday/Monday
SATURDAY 30/6
To: Herm Granger
From: Gin Weasley
Re: HERMIONE!
You know you could've been a little nicer to him! It was our week anniversary, but thanks for making an effort; I know how much it kills you to be friendly to anyone I date.
:( Ginny
To: Gin Weasley
From: Herm Granger
Re: GINNY
Oh come off it Ginny! He was asking way too many questions about school, Draco and I.
I'm the bloody journalist; I'm the one who asks the questions!
I still don't trust him Ginny, there's something really sly about him.
Getting off your boyfriend (that sounds weird) I can't believe Draco Malfoy is a Lawyer! HAHA, what happened to the "All things Muggle are Mutant" remarks? I almost choked when David told me…which reminds me, why didn't you tell me when I came over?
Also, why didn't you tell me about getting sued? I expect you're having David as your Lawyer? Well good luck, but you won't need it. I just did some research on MGF law firm, and they're pretty good. You'll win the case I'm sure. Turns out the 'G' part of it is the guy I saw at the hospital (the one whose wife was in labour)
It's all too weird for me.
Hermione
To: Herm Granger
From: Gin Weasley
Re: It's getting too weird
Tell me about it! But, now don't choke or hurt yourself (or me) when I say this but, don't you think it was meant to be?
I mean, you bumped into Draco (who is a very RICH and successful Lawyer; not too mention a Malfoy) who is a partner in my boyfriends firm and has known him for years; you're single, he's single- you are both stubborn and don't like questions and both met in a hospital while visiting a regurgitating friend and the other who'd love for the thing to just come out.
You both hate David, and you're both looking for love, EVEN if you won't admit it!
Hermione, I think this is a classical story of love and hate; where they will both be awoken from the dark and seek for something new and exciting! This develops into a meaningful and lustful loving romance!
Ready to re-kindle that flame?
Oh, how I wish I was you!
Ginny……….
P.S. I've known about the case for a couple of days, yes David's been helping me and I think the restaurant will put down the charge, it's no big deal.
To: Gin Weasley
From: Herm Granger
Re: Put a sock in it Shakespeare.
Did you read what you're saying? "Lustful loving romance" You're a complete nutcase you know that!
Re-kindle what bloody flame? It's been lights out ever since I've known him!
I'll just ignore everything you wrote/said; I usually do anyway when it comes to you, men and romance.
Do you want to go out with "The Clan" tonight? Sharmayne's bringing "Pinko" – I don't think she knows his name is Derrick yet; Aneen and Ted are coming as well as Harry! It's been ages since we've seen him! (I'm sorry if it seems uncomfortable, but you've gotta get over things like that) Maybe you could bring 'Davey boy' and introduce him to the tribe, since last time you ran off and left us; just to go and have a nice night-time shag
Time: 6:00
Place: Spure
See you there,
Hermione
To: Herm Granger
From: Gin Weasley
Re: Night Time Shag
Oh har har Granger!
I just rang him up and we're going.
Don't you worry about Harry and I, we're over you know.
Just friends.
See you,
Ginny
P.S. Nice choice in Restaurant, I've taught you well.
To: Sharm ; Aneen Gnish ; Ted Simpton ; David Felnof
From: Gin Weasley
Re: Alright Crew…No funny business all right? No talking about Draco or Harry.
(David, Harry's one of my oldest friends and also my Ex)
(People, this is David my boyfriend)
As long as we are clear on that, all will go well, capish?
See you all there!
Ginny
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr: David Felnof
Re: Hermione Jane Granger
Well, after a nice little banter with Ms. Granger last night, I take pleasure in informing you that Hermione is as stubborn as you are. Congratulations, we have found a match.
She also thinks little of me, as do you and she thinks I'm a 'sly-ass little rodent.' Remember to keep that one in your daily insults. Of course she didn't know I heard her, but I did hear her say, 'He's as nosy as a piss-ass frog.' Where she comes up with these- I don't not know.
She lives in London, works for the London Post and occasionally in Cosmo (leading woman's magazine-just in-case you forgot to buy yours this week) She's 26, single, her parents are dentists and own there own business. She doesn't think much of romance and has almost beaten up a guy, when she was standing up for woman's rights.
I thought you said she used to be goody-two-shoes. I think the bloody woman's a mad rebel.
Gin and I are going out tonight with her and their work mates, care to join us COINCIDENTLY?
Well, there's your Granger intake in whole, stay tuned for Sunday, when more dirt shall be unleashed.
Aviento Malfoy.
To: David Felnof
From: Draco Malfoy
Re: I don't believe you
Granger is not a rebel. She must've been lying to you. I'm surprised she didn't have her nose in a book or something. Or did she?
No I won't take your offer. I have better things to do than to see you for an extra day of the week. Five is enough.
Have fun, and don't worry about getting more info on her, I never asked you for it, and it's all a load of 'piss-ass' (although that comment, I believe and totally support 100) anyway.
Draco
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr:Josh Grey
Re: My man.
Draco, my man…GET ME OUT OF HERE!
I have just realised that you indeed are a very smart specimen, and all men should follow in your footsteps.
Don't get married, and if you do…get rid of the mother-in-law as soon as possible!
She's a bloody nightmare Draco, seriously. Honestly, it's a bloody sin to put your feet on the table and slurp when you eat soup and wash your hands in the kitchen sink after having to plough the freggin garden. Who ploughs a garden?
Let's go out somewhere, somewhere nice and soothing where at one stage all your worries will leave you because you are severely hangover…I know that place, heaven! Nah, do you want to go to a bar or something?
I need a severe intoxication of high-price liquor. See, I'm sounding like a madman. Floo over in about 10 minutes, and that's an order.
Josh
To: Josh Grey
From: Draco Malfoy
Re:Ooh
Yes Sir, straight away Sir.
Ha, she's killing you eh? Ah, a few more days won't kill ya...but under these EXTREMELY intense circumstances, you should be gone by Monday.
Okay, I need to get out too. You have 10 minutes, and that only.
Draco
Well this is certainly interesting.
I haven't been this amused since…well ever.
SPUR RESTAURANT Ginny and David are having a snog-o-thon, and Harry looks as if he is about to Avada David.
-Slurp, Sizzle and SweetHey, I'm not stopping him; but honestly, it was Harry's fault they broke up…
Entrees:
Roasted Tomato and ricotta tagliatelle
Pasta with beef ragu
Vegetable ramen
Minestrone
Crab and Corn egg flower noodle broth. (What a bloody mouthful of a soup name! Yes, I'd like a soup, that's it. That's all that needed to be said: A Corn and Crab (eww) soup!)
Omg, my ex Michael is coming over here, probably wondering why we didn't invite him (IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE AN EGOGISTIAL BASTARD, WHOSE HEAD SWELLS UP WHEN HE GETS EMABARASSED!)…Oh great! He has the nerve to ask me 'Why are you writing on a pad of paper' WELL I'm just writing on this menu, because….
Main Course: I don't quite know why. Anyhow after this we're going to…Roadman's bar…
Char grilled jumbo prawns
Mee Grob
Chill lamb cutlets
Caramel pork and pumpkin stir-fry
Vegetarian burgers with coriander garlic creamThai beef skewers with peanut sauce – (I'd love to put a skewer in someone's eye ATM)
Dessert: Wait a tick I know why I'm writing on this…IT'S because I am slightly drunk.
Caramel nut tartlets
Lemon CheesecakeHazelnut opera CORRECT!
Praline dacquoise
Pavlova with fragrant fruit
Mud cake
Sundaes (Flavours include: Caramel, chocolate, strawberry and banana)
Ice cream is available with all servings of dessertOne point for me!
Drinks: (Woah, no more for me)
Water (natural or mineral)
Lemonade
Coke
Orange juice
Hot Chocolate
Cappuccino
Coffee (black or white)
Alcohol is available at the bar.
SHIT! Please don't tell me that's…Crap! It's Aneen's Ex…GONZO or… (Ted is chuckling over my shoulder, reading this; how I don't not know, I can't even understand it! Where's the privacy gone?) Thanks Ted…Yes Jeremy, he's here. But how the bloody hell does he always know where we are!
Mint and biscuits are $1 with all beverages. He's coming over this way, DUCK ANEEN!
That does it; I'm going to show him a thing or two…
Thankyou for coming, we hope to see you again. (How Cliché)
-HA! Bullo! You don't want to see us again….
Shane,
Have you lost your small mind? We cant go through with it. They'll find out, you know they will, and if I know anything about the Mudblood: she'll find out about your little secret or should I say secrets.
Granger wasn't supposed to hit me, that wasn't in the deal Nigen. Its bad enough she broke my nose and then the asshole Malfoy gives me the right hook. You're really pushing it and if you weren't in hiding, well at this stage you would've been.
But I got his details; he took me to the hospital and gave them too me. But I don't see the use of them. You won't be able to just apparate in on him, the guy's a wizard "genius" so he's probably got tones of protection spells on it.
You'll have to find somebody else to do your dirty work, you're little inputs haven't helped the fact they hate me, even if they don't know YOU.
We can't do it,
Jonks
DRACO'S BLOODY FREGGIN JOURNAL
Saturday 30/6, 11:34pm
Like my new title? Draco's bloody freggin journal, it's very formal.
Oh what the hell is wrong with me, I'm writing to a bloody journal, how low can my life get? And at the moment, it is very low.
Another question that one day I will ponder-whenever I can be bothered- is why is it that when I'm ever with Joshua Grey, I always do something stupid. If I'm not totally plastered, I'm picking a fight with an already crippled man.
This brings me to why I'm wasting my time writing, when I could be sleeping. I got in a fight with a guy who just suffered a totally clobbered encounter. The guy's nose looked like it was falling off (slight exaggeration). The poor guy got seriously battered. Ha. He deserved it.
So Josh and I were coming out of Rodman's bar, everything normal, (except for Josh's inebriated (drunk) look on his face) and we were looking for an alley to apparate (although it is dangerous when someone is under the influence- best not tell Marz that)
When this moron bumps into me. Just barged right into me, as if I was bloody transparent.
So I told him to watch out, well actually I told him to &# off- (but that's not the point, no-one slams into me with out getting hexed) then he looks up to me, but I couldn't place that familiar face. And I started to snigger, 'poor bastard, some guy got him bad. Probably hit into him' I said to Josh innocently…I swear!
Then he starts getting all physical on me. It's bad enough to hit me, but to continually try and touch me (unless you're a woman) is totally uncalled for.
"'You watch out you asshole,' " He said to me. The nerve!
So then we started to push and shove. Josh the idiot didn't know what he was doing and was bragging to the people walking by us that, "The blonde's my friend. Go mate go."
Then he did something that was totally uncalled for- it was as if he bound my legs. But I recovered, somehow and injured his arm and bruised his leg. Hey, I'm not promoting violence, BUT HE STARTED IT. He gave me a bruised shoulder and a black eye, that's worse. My delicate complexion ruined!
I don't know what's going to happen, I took the poor ass to the hospital and he got my details. The nurses didn't let me stay over night; they said it wasn't serious- NOT SERIOUS? Hello, MY FACE!
Oh well, I smell trouble, and it stinks.
What's worse, I think the guy's a wizard.
SUNDAY 1/7
To: Herm Granger
From: Gin Weasley
Re: Oooooooohhhhhhh!
Oh man Hermione, if looks could kill, you'd be 6 feet under by now!
What happened to you last night? I mean, I know you were drunk and all, but you were still placid, well up until Jeremy Jonks….what a bloody last name JONKS, came over to us…
GIRL POWER!
But how did you do it without a wand? I never thought you were the type to throw a punch at a Muggle…
I don't think David will annoy you anymore; HECK I'm slightly scared of you now :P
Talk to you tomorrow
3 Ginny
To: Herm Granger
From: Sharm Vonaė
Re: DARLING
Darling! What moves you have! I didn't know you could throw a punch like that; care to teach me? I'd just love to show my Ex-husband what a 'drunken flirt of a Fashion Editor' I am.
You're such a gem!
X0x0x0x0x0x
Sharmayne
P.S. Thanks for telling me his name; he was getting somewhat annoyed with me calling him "Pinko" all the time. There are only so many times you can use the excuse "it's your Pet name darling"
To: Herm Granger
From: Aneen
Re: Hermione! I am SO so sorry!
Hermione! I cannot express how sorry I am for what happened!
I shouldn't have come last night…it was so wrong of me. I knew Jeremy would find me (he always does) and cause a scene…I just hoped for this once that he wouldn't…but as always proven: I was wrong.
OH Hermione, I can fully understand if you'll never speak to me again. But thanks for throwing a few punches his way; he really deserved it.
My apologies,
Aneen
To: Herm Granger
From: Ted Simpton
Re: Whoa baby!
If I weren't homosexual, you'd better run!
Aren't you a little fighter, you wench? You were even better than Keanu Reeves in Speed and The Rock in Walking Tall, mmmmmmmmmmmmm…and when did you start weights? I can see a nice refinement in those arms of yours missy!
Oh don't be scared, I'm still gay :P
Poor Aneen though, all the way home she was panicking because she thought you'd be mad at her. You've gotta love her sometimes!
See you at work Xena!
Ted
To: Ted Simpton
From: Herm Granger
Re: Aneen
Yeah tell me about it. She was all 'sorry this and sorry that' I think the poor dear should get a chill pill. I'm not mad at her.
And what's this all about Xena? I know how much you love her…should I watch out: P
I don't know what went over me yesterday; I was like a mad woman…it was scary!
Maybe my drink was spiked.
Ciao for now,
Xena
To: Aneen
From: Herm Granger
Re: Yesterday
Aneen Luvy, you've got to stop worrying and apologising! You've done nothing wrong. It just that asshole ex of yours really gets on my nerves; and last night when he hit you; I blew it!
You should take some legal action Aneen, seriously. He's literally stalking you.
I'll see you tomorrow at work, ok?
Hermione
To: Sharm Vonae
From: Herm Granger
Re: The secret
The secret to my success is:
GET TOTALLY HAMMERED SO YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
But seeing as you are always like that (drunk), you only have to work on hitting them, instead of snogging them senseless.
That's it; oh and you really have to hate the guy/girl, to gain the will power or knocking them off their feet.
Hope that helps
Hermione
To: Gin Weasley
From: Herm Granger
Re: I'm in trouble
Besides not trusting/liking your partner, there's something fishy about Jonks. I mean how can he know exactly where Aneen is…ALL THE TIME WE GO OUT? And it's as if I'm the constant target, and it's not just because I'm the nutter who gets mad at him.
I don't know, maybe I'm just paranoid; yeah I think that's it. I'm a bloody paranoid maniac.
But, what did really happen? I mean he came over started causing a scene (as usual) said some bad stuff, I slapped him and that's all I can remember…I mean I'm severely hung-over so I don't know what happened….
Care to help me out?
Hermione
P.S. What's this about Michael calling Harry: DRACO?
CARE TO EXPLAIN THAT ONE, MISS WEASLEY?
To: Herm Granger
From: Gin Weasley
Re: Help you out
Sorry love, but you're going to need more help than me…
Ok, well here is the scene.
You were writing on a piece of paper; the menu I assume, looking plastered.
Ted was checking out some guy who was believed to be gay; and was totally drooling all over himself.
Harry looked as if he could kill David, whilst talking calmly to Aneen.
Sharmayne and Derrick (a.k.a. Pinko) were 'discussing' some things they were going to be doing when they got home (but I reckon they were taking the 'talking' up a notch if you know what I mean) Ms. Sharmy was going as Red as her leather coat.
Then Michael comes up from the bar and starts talking about something or other; I seriously don't know HOW or WHY you went out with that man! You must've been desperate or totally or your knockers!
P.S. Sweetie, I have absolutely NO idea what you were talking about…Harry as Draco? Yes, you were drunk; it was all in your imagination.
Mwa Mwa (Omg, that's so…Sharmayne-y)
Gin.
To: Michael Breenay
Fr:Gin Weasley
Re: What?
Personally I don't care if you're the managing editor of the newspaper that I work at on a weekday basis; but who the hell told you about Draco? Did you eavesdrop or get it from a source, which can be identified as Sharmayne Vonae?
What is wrong with you?
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr: Josh Grey
Re: Go go go go
Go go go go Malfoy, I smell a court case, you're gonna die cause it is a court case, Dave's gonna kill you cause it's a court case…but if that guy is smart he wont make a court case…
Ha, I'm listening to some 100 cents (isn't that a dollar?) or something and I'm rearranging the words: That proves to be a bad attempt.
I don't think you should've given him your details- he might sue you. But then again, when he heard who you were, he sunk deeper than my mother's eye bags. I wish I had your power, oh great Malfoy.
I knew you could hit, but damn…Ouch.
I can't wait to tell David. Ha.
Josh
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr: David Felnof
Re: Ouch.
News travels fast, how's your eye? Haha, it didn't tarnish that lovely Malfoy physique did it? I hope so.
You'll never guess what news I have for you. Innocent Hermione gets drunk faster than you get pissed off with me. You two would make quite an item you know.
And like you, when she's drunk she likes to use her fist, and in her case her whole body. Some guy one of the girls used to date came there and caused some rouble. Anyways he hit Aneen (the girl) and started swearing. I was utterly disgusted, no one treats a woman like that, and even you have enough decency to not do that.
So our little miss cuss-et jumped on him and smacked him one. Right on the nose- I'm surprised he still has one and everyone in the restaurant jeered her one. Something about Girl Power, I don't know, that's too Spice Girls for me.
So what do you say about that? Most probably that my brain is too small to ever make up such a thing, right?
Think about it.
To: David Felnof (
From: Draco Malfoy
Re: Right…
He didn't have an all black ensemble now did he?
Whatever man, see you at work…oh how I dread Mondays
Draco
To: Josh Grey
From: Draco Malfoy
Re: har-har, when did…
…You become a comedian? I should've let you live in that peril with your mother-in-law, you jack ass.
I'm glad you found the whole situation exceedingly entertaining, that you made a stupid jingle out of it. And that you had the nerve to tell David about it.
Man, is the whole world against me or something? I'm afraid that if I see you on Monday, the events of Saturday night will come and haunt me, and my eye will delve deeper into the black hole of my ever-strenuous brain.
Good day!
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr: Marz Grey
Re: What's this…?
I hear you discouraging my husband to unhand the strain of mother in laws? Shame on you, Mr Malfoy. Shall I tell your auntie?
Hah, oh it's an open threat, but Joshua might tell her.
The poor guy, he's dying because of my mother. You think I should let him out of his misery by telling him she's going tonight? Nah, me neither.
Drop by some time, when the oldie's not here.
Miss ya (so does Ashley)
Mary
P.S. What's this I hear you beating up some guy? Naughty, naughty.
Dear Draco,
It has been a while since we have spoken; since the last family banquet in May I believe. Such a shame you do not visit more often, your cousin misses you terribly. You must stop on over.
I write to you today, to address two minor flaws in your daily basement. The first is that you are 26 and not with a woman. My dear, you and Xavier are the last two in line for the Malfoy name, and both aren't getting younger. We need to continue this heritage Draco, most of the pureblood witches are too stupid to run a business or spell there name for goodness sakes (take that Pansy girl, why your father wanted you two to mate, I shall have no idea) so we are broadening your choices, you may marry any woman you want, as long as she knows wizardry, and knows her place. Unfortunately that includes the Mudbloods, but make sure she will not tarnish the name.
Also, I hear that you have gotten yourself into a brawl of some sort. That is not respectable behaviour Draco. If anyone should hear such a thing, it would taint our Name and our Future. I shall have no more of that, understood?
'Tis a shame to leave you on a bad note, but it must be said.
Your Great Aunt,
Oh and also, I believe you have been notified of our family get-together. If not it is in two weeks. The same place as always.
Journal of Draco Malfoy
Sunday 1/7
Oh hell, how did she know? Bloody aunty, if she wasn't so slow in typing up her will, I'd have gotten rid of her by now…
She has no right, none at all, to tell me who and when I should date. Oh yay, now I can date mudbloods, not that I care for that absurd name anymore, but I did date a mudblood-shame I cannot recall her name….
Mate? Mate? What am I, an animal? Get with the times woman!
Anyway, that's all I have to write, I'm peeved off, that's what I am…
I had to shrug off some unwanted energy…now I'm going to kill Josh…
To: Josh Grey
From: Draco Malfoy
Re: Why the bloody
Hell did you tell my aunty? You know if I stuff up anymore I won't get my inheritance! You ass, now she's lecturing me about marriage…marriage for god's sake. She's the one who married 4 times!
Draco
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr: Josh Grey
Re: Nice
To know you care so much for money, and I didn't really want to open this email because I knew it would be pessimistic with the title "Bloody" on it, but I had to seeing as this stupid computer kept saying, "You've got mail, you've got mail" I had too.
YES I KNOW MORON, YOU'VE TOLD ME 100 TIMES…
Now that I'm settled, I didn't tell your Aunty, I'm scared of her, and you know that.
Maybe David did it, hmm?
Josh
To: Josh Grey
From: Draco Malfoy
Re:Lovely day
(Is that title better for you? Or doesn't Sarcasm fit either?)
I don't really care about the money surprise surprise, it's my bloody cousin Xavier, he's too immature to get a majority of it, he'll spend it faster than Marz on her day off…and that's bad.
Draco
To: David Felnof From: Draco Malfoy
Re: Let me ask you something
Did you tell my auntie about Saturday? Hmm?
I hope you know how hard it is, listening/ reading about an old ladies opinion of marriage when she herself has been the victim of the disease several times.
You're a 'sly old rodent' you know. One point for Granger.
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr: David Felnof
Re: Oh
How your words hurt me. I shall forever shrink away into nothingness because of your evil wrath.
I told Xavier who must've told your Aunt; tough.
Yes he did.
David.
To: David Felnof
From: Draco Malfoy
Re: yes.
Yes, but would you stay there, shrink away I mean.
What do you mean by "Yes he did"?
To: Draco Malfoy
Fr: David Felnof
Re: Yes he did
I believe you and Hermione attacked the same guy.
Another trait you two both share. Violence.
May your children not suffer from such a contagious disability?
David.
DIARY OF SHANE NIGEN
This is brilliant.
My plan worked, Granger's drink was spiked with an aggression potion which was pinpointed at Jonks. So when she saw his face she'd automatically want to punch his face. Jonks didn't know about the potion though and is now whining to me about his mucked up face.
Now I have to convince him to 'sue' her and then we can trap her and…
I wasn't counting on Malfoy to get involved, but the fact we got his details is excellent.
It's all going according to plan.
Potter was at the bar tonight, talking rubbish no doubt; I should've listened. I was trying so hard not to just go up to him and hex scar face into oblivion.
Well I will soon.
REMASTERED
SouredSweetie