Everythings cool…sorta by Safarilite
A/N:HAPPY HALLOWEEN MADA-FUCKAZ heheh na just kidding…IPlayed Tekken tag 2 {FUCKING HELLA AWESOME} got it 2 days before it came out but I couldn't play it like I liked too because I've been buried in tests, oral presentations, papers & essays but atleast I played and came to a conclusion I CANT BEAT JUN IN BOSSMODE ON THE FIRST TRY momma got serious skills…and…while I was playing it a bunch of ideas swarmed in my head for a story so I'm gonna write and see where I go yaknow edit it and stuff before I post. As for my soul caliber story im getting ideas for new stories but not really getting anything for the one I already wrote, but if you dudes/gals have any ideas or anything (read it if ya want) I would gladly accept the help, I bought 2 new guitars {Electric 64 Fender Stratocaster midnight black with a whammy bar and amp and a Maplewood Acoustic guitar}, I also got the new GREENDAY album soooooo f*cking 'bout that love the song(s) "Rusty James", "Kill the DJ", "Nuclear family", "Sweet 16" "Let yourself Go" and "Stay the Night" I CANT WAIT FOR !DOUS!...and ~sigh~…im having major writers block & I can't seem to get rid of it so if this chapter is lacky and not as funny please forgive me its frekkin difficult and this was all I could come up with at the current moment -_- {Im so sorry} if theres any other ideas you guys would want instead just tell me and ill redo…welp here we go. Please review but you don't haft to if ya don't want to.
Disclaimer: I…OWN…NOTHING {but the story} But someday I'LL OWN IT ALL ~Pump fist in the air Ash Ketchum style then falls back in rolling desk chair~…Ah who the f*ck am I kidding
Nero and a nervous Dante was sitting in the lounge-room watching TV, Trish and Lady was shopping online, Lucia saw Dante's uneven body language, she put her hand on his & turned towards him
"Dante are you okay?" Lucia asked
"Hm? O yeah im…im uh ~he looks back and quickly turns around~ im cool" Dante weakly chuckled
"Are you? cause your usually happy around this time seeing that its hal-"
"-long do you think your hair is?" Dante asked quickly changing the subject
"Mid-arm length…you sure you're okay?" Lucia caringly asked
"I told you im fine" Dante continued watching TV trying to avoid Lucia weary gaze
There was a knock at the door and Dante went to go answer it and when he did only one thing popped in his head 'Sh*t' there was a group of little kids all dressed up in pretty and ghoulish costumes with bags and buckets in hand filled with candy, they looked up at Dante with huge grins and extended their buckets
"Happy Hallo-"Dante threw applesauce in their goody-bags
"There now leave" Dante slammed the door, when he was about to walk away theres was a bang at the door he opened it again to reveal a very angry mob of kids
"Hey mister what-up with lame treats?" an angry little boy dressed as a rock-star asked
"YEAH!?" all the other little kids agreed
"What about it?" Dante Shrugged
"Its applesauce!" a furious little girl dressed as a Greek goddess exclaimed
"APPLESAUSE ISNT CANDY" the children yelled
"You're lucky I gave you anything ya little crumb snatchers" Dante retorted
"You gave us that 'cause it's the only thing that your dentures can chew and shribbled up stomach can digest" another little boy dressed as a mad scientist mentioned
"Ha-ha good one kid but atleast im not going door to door begging for food from strangers like im homeless" Dante said with the warmest smile
"My momma is gay cause of creepy bastards like you" an enraged little girl glaring dressed like pop-star spat
"Well Ms. Potty mouth yo momma sounds like one messed up b*tch" Dante simply said
"YOU SUCK" the kids irately said as they left from the porch
"Ahh get outta here ya little panhandlers" Dante said
He then slammed the door and sat back down on the sofa, putting up his feet on the coffee table and continued to watch TV with Lucia and Nero
"Oh hey look there doing a hal- ~Dante stomps on his foot~ -AHH WHAT THE F*CK" Nero punched Dante in his stomach then gripped his achy foot
"OWW dude you had a bug on your foot" Dante said
"Dante are you feeling alright?" Trish asked
"Yes" Dante answered
"You sure? because you've been acting extra weird lately" Lady asked
"What is this 20 questions? Guys im fine" Dante stated
Vergil came downstairs and walked into the kitchen, Dante quickly headed to the other room, the oldest son of Sparda had re-entered the living-room and Lady ran, wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a soft kiss on the lips and he wrapped his arms around her waist
"Happy early birthday Verge" Lady greeted him
"Why thank you" Vergil said then kissed her on the lips
"So what do you want for your birthday?" Lady asked
"Nothing" Vergil answered
"You always say nothing-"Lady began
"And you always get me something" Vergil interrupted
"Exactly so…to save me the trouble of looking what do you want?" Lady re-stated her question
"You know me anything you get I'll love it" Vergil assured then kissed her
Nero started to surf the channels on the flat screen and he finally came across another interesting TV cartoon special that caught his eager childish eyes and he started bouncing in his seat
"Alright guys looklooklook another hall-~Rudra comes flying in the room and goes through the TV~ -OLYSH*T" Nero looked around to see where it came from
Dante emerged from the room and calmly walked over to the demolished TV, pulled the Rudra outta the busted hole in the screen.
"WHAT THE HELL MAN!?" Rudra hollered
"Shut the f*ck up" Dante said to Rudra
Then he calmly walked away returning to the other room from whence he came not even noticing the 'what…the…F*ck…are you thinking?' looks that everyone had on. Nero was pissed he, Lucia and Vergil inspected the TV
"Maybe it can still be fixed" Lucia said trying to hold onto hope
But alas for the beloved family member that hope had died when it fell from off the wall mount, crashed onto the floor and split in half, Nero had to fight back the tears that were strongly getting ready to fall from his icy green eyes. Vergil was pissed because he knew he was probably gonna be the one who replaced the damn idiot box, he just walked off outta the room most likely to return to his study, after the coast was clear Dante returned in the living-room and laid down on the sofa
"HEY ASSWIPE WHAT THE HELL!?" Nero angrily spat at the youngest son of Sparda
"What're you talking about?" Dante cluelessly asked
"You bludgeoned the TV assgasket" Nero said nearly lunching for his neck
"B*tch thought I was playing so I chucked the bastard" Dante said
"Are you f*cking insane? Yaknow what bad things is gonna happen to you" Nero said
"Like what?" Dante rolled his eyes
"I don't know but your ass is gonna get got…maybe on hallowe-" Nero sternly said but, was cut off by a growling Dante tackling him
"What the hell's wrong with you!?" Nero demanded
"I was just about to ask you the same question" Dante said
Nero shoved him off and kicked him in his gut, which Dante gripped in pain. They both rejoined Lucia on the sofa staring at the wall, then down at the battered TV
"I f*cking hate you" Nero glared at Dante who just shrugged
Dante was really happy he even wanted to sigh in relief but he feared that Vergil would hear him, he had hope his brother forgot what happened but Vergil's memory was like a frekkin computer its quite frightening at times how much he knows about the past however, Dante looked at his phone checking the time 4:38 'Alright just a little longer to freedom all I haft to do is make sure no one mentions-' Kyrie suddenly burst through the doors with decorations and bags of candy for the little trick-or-treaters in her hands.
"HAPPY HALLOWEEN" a cheerful Kyrie shouted
"NOOOO" Dante yelled
"AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH" Vergil came crashing through the ceiling landing on Dante just beating the pure hell outta him, Dante pushed him off and started running for safety
"VERGIL IM SORRY" Dante loudly pleaded running away
"YOU THOUGHT I FORGOT!?" Vergil yelled trying to kill his little brother
"VERGIL IM SORRY" Dante yelled still running
"I NEVER FORGET!" Vergil roared tackling Dante ramming him through the kitchen wall
Vergil was killing the fire out of Dante, but Dante eventually pried his big brother off his damaged body and ran down the stairs to the basement with Vergil hot on his tail, Dante kicked open a chest and picked up a bottle. When Vergil lunged for Dante he turned around and threw it in a cross like shape repeatedly
"THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU" Dante repeatedly said over and over
The water hit Vergil's eyes and body and since he was half demon it burned worser than hell, he held his eyes because of the searing pain, Dante took this as the chance to attack, he hastily set the water down and droplets got on his hand
"OW" Dante quickly yelled in pain because he was part demon the holy water burn his hand hard
Vergil was still temporally blinded so, Dante grabbed Rebellion and pierced it into Vergil's stomach, Vergil fell to the ground and Dante sighed in relief that he avoided the wrath of Vergil this time. He turned his big bro over and saw blood running out of the gaping gash in Vergil's abdomen
"Uhh" Dante face cringed at the site of the bloody mess
Dante lifted Vergil up and sat him in the chair; he tried to pull out Rebellion slowly so he wouldn't wake up Vergil. As he was gliding the sword hear could hear the squishy screech of Vergil's organs rearranging, when Dante was about to pull the sword out Vergil's eyes shot open and he hands gripped onto Dante's neck strangling him, Dante strangled Vergil who launched forward and fell out the chair. They were rolling on the floor in a cat-fight like way but more violent.
"IM GOING TO SEND YOU TO HELL" Vergil roared
"WELL I HOPE YOU LIKE LONG VACATIONS 'CUASE IM TAKING YOU WITH ME" Dante fired back
They tussled and fought for a while, eventually they became tired and also Vergil felt intense pain for the sword in his stomach so he decided to spare Dante's life to save his own. He gently tugged the sword but it was stuck because the blood had dried around it, he tried every way to get it out but nothing happened Dante saw his struggle and offered his help, Vergil took it but was ready put his foot in Dante's ass if he tried anything, they both pulled but nothing happened after 16 minutes passed Dante came up to a conclusion
"Vergee ~Vergil gives him 'say it and your ass will be my new boot' look~ eeil the swords only gonna come out with two options" Dante said examining the gash
"What?" Vergil cautiously asked
"Well we either soak and loosen it? Or we can do a 123 process and rip it out? it's a sharp pain but it'll be over quickly" Dante tried to convince Vergil to take the second idea 'cause it was quicker that and he was gripping the sword to proceed with it anyway, Vergil quickly smacked his hand
"Let's not be hasty brother what can we soak it with?" Vergil asked
"We can't use water cause it'll get infected and kill ya ~Dante's eyebrow raises for a sec and Vergil punches him in the head~ Oww okay okay um…the only two options are rubbing alcohol or holy water your pick" Dante stated
"Okay let's see if we dab it with holy water that'll possibly kill me ~Dante grabs the bottle~ PUT…IT…DOWN! ~Dante puts it down with a huge frown~ but if we use the alcohol and wiggle it out that will be hell"
As Vergil continued to ponder in his aloud thoughts of a less painful situation, Dante ran by him and pulled Rebellion out with great force, Vergil screamed in pain
"There ya go" Dante said smiling, Vergil blacked-out
Dante slinged him over his shoulders and carried him upstairs to the living-room and laid his body on the sofa, everyone looked at Dante like he was a murderer, Lady ran over to him and checked Vergil, his wound had completely healed but his clothes was a bloody mess then she glared at Dante who raised his brow
"What did you do?" Lady demanded
"I saved his life" Dante said with enormous pride
"He looks dead?" Kyrie said cocking her head to the side
"Hopefully he is" Dante lowly said walking down the hall
"What!?" Lady exclaimed checking his pulse, Vergil was breathing but was on a major snooze cruise
"Nothing…I hate my birthday" Dante said rolling his eyes
Well that's it hope you liked it, im really sorry if it's not funny at all it was all I could come up with like I said if theres anything else you would want on this chapter just tell me and I'll redo. My house was almost knocked out due to hurricane Sandy but thankfully it wasn't but my prayers are with those who weren't as lucky but atleast I don't haft to go to school until next week so, im gonna make the most of it by eating sloppy Joe's, mac-n-cheese drink chocolate milk and soda etc., Got channel 11 back so im hecka happy. Rite now im listening to 'King for a Day' by Green Day OH by the way I didn't know what color Nero's eyes are so I just winged it and um, I don't know Vergil and Dante's actual birthday so…yeah however, I do think it'll be super awesome to find out they were born on Halloween. Sorry that it's long I tried to make it humor-able, so that's all Happy Halloween, Thanx and later.