Disclaimer: I do not own Dynasty Warriors or any of the characters. It and they belong to Koei. I own my OCs.

Have you ever wished you were intrepid? Invincible and immune to fear? But, as much as we wish this could happen, it won't. To be courageous doesn't mean to fear nothing. It's your ability to face and conquer that fear. I've always been envious of those people who could accomplish such feat. Perhaps I'm weak, or I'm simply a coward. Either way, my fears always prevail...

I blink, my voice rising into a shrill tone of disbelief. "What?!"

Zhuge Liang looks amused and calmly repeats. "I have a proposal that would indubitably distract the villagers in such a way that we need it to."

"And?!"

"My proposal is to have you and Master Lu Xun wed as you both are, without a doubt, very popular amongst the villagers."

His words blow me into oblivion. My heart gradually rises from a steady pounding into a wild, erratic hammering in my chest, and I am dimly aware of almost everyone's stares weighing down on me. The silence in the room might as well have executed me.

Zhuge Liang turns to Lu Xun after waiting patiently for my response—which I don't give verbally. I inhale deeply, desperately attempting to regain my composure. Everyone's gaze shift to Lu Xun, mine included. Lu Xun's expression appears controlled and impassive, as always. He nods—a soldier affirming a command.

"Whatever would be best," he says smoothly, phlegmatic.

I don't know how I'm supposed to feel. But, the constriction of my chest, and the tightening of my throat is definitely not pleasant. I hastily cast a glance at Lu Xun. I meet his eyes for a moment, but it's like looking at a stranger. His eyes are uncaring and guarded with a touch of unnatural hardness to them

Everyone looks at me expectantly.

My mouth is dry, and my throat constricts again, nearly choking me. For a moment, my heart freezes. Remember my reference to a roller coaster before? This is that point where you're once centimeter away from the drop.

"What will be your response?" presses Zhuge Liang, disregarding the fact that I am under everyone's disconcerting stares.

I feel the full force of shock starting to dominate over my will to stay impervious. I breathe rapidly and squirm, feeling myself shrink under the weight forced onto me.

"I-I need sometime...to think," I choke out after a few torturous moments.

Zhuge Liang nods. "That is fine. However, we will need your response soon. You and Master Lu Xun would make a more...ah….believable couple seeing as how most in the village assume you are to be wed to him. Your cooperation would greatly benefit us."

I swallow thickly. It hurts to see that Lu Xun could care less about me. Casting my eyes downwards, I wait impatiently for the meeting to be over. However, the persistent coolness and indifference that Lu Xun keeps hurling my way builds a greater weight on my shoulders. To be honest, I had never thought about marriage—much less with someone who dislikes me. My question is why Lu Xun is cold towards me. I don't believe that it's simply because I am around the male population. I don't believe it. I know that is not the reason. I remain dazed for the rest of the meeting, noting the tension in his shoulders, the clenching of his jaw, and the abnormal stiffness of his posture. He is unusually rigid, almost as if he is forcing himself to keep up a facade of some sort.

"The Wei army will cross between these two areas. We will send a small group to scale the trees and release the snakes. The group should be agile and skilled with climbing..."

It feels odd—the coldness that he's treating me with. It doesn't feel real—like he's forcing his anger to keep his distance. I glance at him unconsciously. Lu Xun doesn't notice my gaze on him. Instead, he is studiously focusing his attention to Zhuge Liang, who is explaining every detail of the plan.

"...female as they have smaller frames and can move faster..."

No. He's ignoring me for another reason. I can feel it.

"...not Da Qiao..."

But, why? He should have argued against marrying someone he dislikes...

"I refuse to let Xiao Qiao...not the Qiao sisters as Cao Cao is after them..."

Lu Xun is an enigma, an impossible riddle.

"Absolutely not! Shang Xiang will not go..."

"Brother!"

"...Yue Ying...decoy...distract..."

"No one...except...who?"

"Xin Ying..."

My head snaps up when I hear my name. "Huh? What?"

"Do you think you would be able to help ambush the Wei army that passes through this region with the snakes?"

"Uh...yeah...sure," I say absentmindedly, wanting to shy away from all the attention.

I rest my chin in my palm, staring ahead blankly. My thoughts are too scattered. Once again, I hear the discussion of the outside world, but I can't completely process their words.

"...No other females."

"...Let the midget go..."

"Don't be rude...but...has a good point...he has a small frame...probably follows Xin Ying around on trees...swift...cover her back...good with swords."

"...I agree...see them climbing trees to the rooftops...can keep up with her...we need everyone else for things like...Gan Ning for water attack...no one else?"

"...don't think so...cares too much about his hair...probably fall off the trees..."

"...he'll probably get bit by the snakes...fall off trees too...fall...into water and drown...should stop insulting people..."

"He and Xin Ying will make the perfect pair..."

"Is that all right?"

I nod dopily, not knowing what is being asked. But, since everyone else is nodding, I might as well do what they are doing. Everyone stands up, preparing to leave. I mimic them, standing up and stretching out my arms. My muscles feel sore from sitting in the same position for a long time.

As I pass through the doors, Da Qiao and Gan Ning join me. Gan Ning wraps an arm around my shoulders. I'm too distracted to shrug it off.

"We'll be cleaning the horses and stables today!" he exclaims with false cheer.

I barely look at him. "I thought that was next week?"

"He decided to move it to today since we'll be preoccupied later on with battle plans and preparations."

Da Qiao looks baffled as she moves quickly to keep up with our longer strides. "Why would you need to clean the horses and stables?"

I think about the soy sauce and wonder if I should tell Da Qiao.

"No reason," supplies Gan Ning hastily.

Da Qiao raises an eyebrow but decides not to pursue the matter. Her expression brightens. "Did I tell you that my daughter is visiting?"

I think back on what Da Qiao told me the day I came here. I recall she told that her daughter was at a prestigious school for young girls. The only word that's supposed to be in there but is not is "wealthy". The school is for wealthy girls. It teaches things such as calligraphy, literature, art, cooking, sewing, dancing, appreciation for the arts, singing, and playing instruments. Honestly, I think they should add in some more useful classes such as mathematics (algebra and geometry), science (anatomy and astronomy), architecture and engineering, philosophy, and basic self-defense. I voice my opinions verbally.

"What's wrong with everything else?" asks Da Qiao, sounding imperceptibly affronted.

Gan Ning chuckles.

I shrug. "No offense or anything, but wouldn't we have more use of mathematics, science, and everything else I listed? It would allow us to have improvement in our construction of buildings and siege weapons. Singing, dancing, and the arts are mostly for entertainment. However, our priority should be protecting ourselves and shaping a better world. I guess dancing could help you become better on your feet and appreciation of the arts would let you be more open-minded. Actually, everything else does have its uses. But, are these girls really going to use it for anything else besides making them appear more attractive?"

"No," admits Da Qiao reluctantly, seeing my perspective. "I suppose not. We had uses for dancing, singing, and musical instruments when we had to infiltrate something or somewhere. These girls won't."

"Teaching these skills to them is mainly to make them look ideal for a future husband and such," I say cogently.

Da Qiao sighs and casts me a grudging but teasing smile. "You are always the one with reason, huh? Perhaps I should let my daughter infiltrate someplace, too."

I crack a smile. "Sun Ce would never allow that."

Da Qiao sighs again, looking at me apologetically. "Of course he wouldn't! I'm really sorry I won't be able to accompany you when you ambush the Wei forces. Sun Ce and Zhou Yu just wouldn't allow Xiao Qiao, Shang Xiang, or I to help you despite the fact that we're all trained in combat and perfectly capable."

"They're just looking out for you," reasons Gan Ning.

"So much concern for me," I mutter. "Just because I'm not related to them, Sun Ce and Zhou Yu think it is fine if I die."

Da Qiao pats my shoulder, shaking her head. "It's not like that. They think you're very skilled with climbing naturally agile."

I nod, accepting this compliment as compensation. Then, I feel confused. "Wait. If aren't coming with me, then who is?"

Da Qiao and Gan Ning exchange a glance.

"That would be Lu Xun," answers Da Qiao slowly. "They asked both of you if that was fine, correct?"

I think back to when I was nodding dumbly without a clue as to what was going on.

"Oh," I say, dumbfounded.

"Yeah," says Gan Ning.

"Oh! Did I also mention that my daughter was exchanging letters with Lu Xun?" asks Da Qiao brightly.

My chest constricts again, growing an unexplainable resentment for Da Qiao's daughter whom I've never even met.

"Really, now?" inquires Gan Ning curiously, arm still around my shoulders. His grip tightens as if he senses my annoyance.

"Yes," she answers, turning to me. "Sun Qi told me through her letters that she was also exchanging letters with Lu Xun. They were quite good friends when she was here."

Gan Ning snorts. "So will she stay here, or will she return to that school?"

"We haven't decided yet," responds Da Qiao, oblivious to my growing irritation.

Although she knows of my fondness of Lu Xun, Da Qiao seems to be unaware that this discussion of her daughter is unsettling me. Gan Ning pats my back, understanding that I'm becoming increasingly uneasy. We reach the entrance to the outside world—and the exit of the inside one.

"Well, I should be off now," says Da Qiao, flashing us a soft smile. "I promised Xiao Qiao that I would do something with her."

Gan Ning and I nod as she leaves. We push open the doors, the sunlight temporarily blinding us. I squint, raising a hand to shield my eyes from such brilliant light.

"It's a little funny, ya know?" comments Gan Ning, observing my expression.

"What?"

"That you're making him jealous and now he's making you jealous," he clarifies nonchalantly.

My face flushes. "W-What are you talking about?"

He chuckles and looks at me knowingly. "I'm not incognizant of your feelings. I can sense human emotions and observe, too," he says, "much better than you give me credit for."

"It's weird," I admit.

"That's better." He smiles, encouragingly. "But, do clarify."

I sigh, looking off into the distance as we approach the stables. "I don't know, to be honest. Lu Xun... He's mad."

"I know that," he chuckles.

"It feels a bit odd. It feels as though his anger isn't natural; he's forcing it," I explain glumly, fidgeting with my hands. "Or maybe it's just me."

We reach the stables silently. I open a stall, the wooden door creaking faintly. Inside, a friendly brown horse, nuzzles me. I laugh sadly, hands stroking its soft mane. My distraction is short, and I return to my melancholy state.

"Hmm," ponders Gan Ning, reaching for a pitchfork.

I lead that horse out of the stable. I grab a sponge and a dented, gray metal bucket that's already filled to the rim with water. As I move it, the water spills out, dampening my bandage. I rip it off inconspicuously so that Gan Ning won't notice. To my relief, he doesn't.

I dunk the sponge into the bucket of water, and start brushing it across the horse's mane. We continue cleaning for a while. Occasionally, Gan Ning would make a sarcastic remark about how clean horses and their living habits are. He seems to sense that I would appreciate it if he would allow me to wallow in my affliction.

I shudder, recalling the cold indifference of his eyes. Cold... Too cold. Like the icy crystals of the winter. Like dry ice, capable to despite its frosty temperature.

I spent the next few days like this: in this zombie trance. Forgetfulness and absentmindedness became my companions as I trudged to the stables daily with Gan Ning trailing behind me. Every day was the same question: Why is he angry?

I breathed a relieved sigh when I finish. The horses are clean...for now, at least. I stretch my arms. Looking over at Gan Ning, I see that he's tired as well.

"Well," yawns Gan Ning. "I'm gonna go get some food first."

I nod, acknowledging that I heard him.

"Coming?"

"Sure. I'll just go change my clothes first."

I look down at my attire, making a revolted face. It's coated with dirt and caked with mud. There are a few splashes of murky water here and there. We part ways when we enter the palace. Gan Ning clambers off to the dining hall while I go to my room. It takes me a few moments to change my attire.

As I walk out of my room, I finish tying on my sash. However, I look up only to see a maid hurrying toward me with a stack of clothes in her arms piled up so that she is blind to what is in front of her. A bamboo screen is tucked under her arm, and a letter is balanced on top all of the clothes. We collide with a jarring impact that sends everything in her hands tumbling to the ground.

I rub my aching forehead with a grimace and jump to my feet when I realize what I did.

"I am so so sorry," I apologize relentlessly as I help the maid up.

She scrambles to pick everything up in a hurry, arms flying to become blurs. She bows, assuring me that it's her fault with a flushed face. Then, she attempts to move, only to drop an ivory colored envelope with gold decorations. Bending down, I pick up the envelope, peering at it curiously.

"Would you like some help?" I offer.

Her face visibly brightens, and she straightens up as if a burden has been taken off her. The maid looks at me hopefully. "Oh! Would you?" Once she realizes that she has asked someone of higher rank to do a menial task for her, she averts her gaze to the ground, ready to be reprimanded.

"Of course," I assure her. "Would you like me to deliver this letter?"

I wave the envelope gently, the paper wrinkling. Discreetly, I try to decipher the words written on the envelope in elegant calligraphy.

"Oh! If you would!" she cries in relief, not noticing my prying. "Thank you! It's to be sent to Lord Lu Xun."

With another swift bow, the maid hurries away. I watch her retreating back, puzzled. Why is she so relieved? Immediately after I ask myself that, another group of busy maids walk briskly past me, a mountain of folded towels and dress in their hands. I shake my head incredulously, knowing the palpable answer to my question. My attention returns to the letter, curiosity becoming a conflagration. I start my route to his room. Once I turn into a secluded corridor (a longer route to Lu Xun's room), I glance behind me furtively and restrain myself from ripping open the envelope. My fingers work deftly to open the envelope without damaging the envelope. Tilting the envelope, a piece of paper slips out. It's folded neatly in half. I unfold the paper, revealing the words to my prying eyes. After reading the first few sentences, I blanch; a sick, cold feeling of dread settles in the pit of my stomach like a parasite.

To my dearest Lu Xun,

I'm glad to know that you've been well. I did miss you; the one person I couldn't bear to leave was you. But, I'm sure you are already aware of that. I'm also sure you'll keep our discussion a secret. For, if everyone finds out, it would be a disaster, wouldn't it? And we wouldn't want that to happen, do we? I'll be back soon enough, and when I am, we can end your...ah...dallies. I know that you are devoted to your intention to keep her out of harm's way—to keep her from knowing. Honestly, I applaud you for your effort. Just remember: Your effort will be completely futile if you abandon me. We will work on this together. You really shouldn't be too excited about getting married either. I shall leave you with this letter now, in hopes that you will realize that our plan will succeed whether you have faith or not. Farewell, my love.

See you soon,

Sun Qi

I reread the letter multiple times, not comprehending the equivocal language the first few times. After finally being able to construe the letter, I am slapped by the realization of the meaning behind it.

I'll be back soon enough, and when I am, we can end your dallies. When I get back, you'll no longer need the companionship of other women. I know that you are devoted to your intention to keep her out of harm's way—to keep her from knowing. I know that you don't want her to realize that she has no future with you. You really shouldn't be too excited about getting married either. We will be together forever so your possible imminent marriage isn't a big deal .….to keep her from knowing. To keep me from knowing.

My hands tremble, my eyes sting, and my chest twists with an agonizing pain. I stumble forward on the unsteady ground. I choke on my tears, chest constricting even more. The contents of the letter echoes in my head with a deafening roar. The words are like poison to my heart, weakening me. I slump down against the wall next to me, hugging myself, acutely aware of my nails into my arms. I shake my head vigorously as if to shake out the words I've read. The letter might just be deliberately fallacious. Perhaps my enmity and animus towards Da Qiao's daughter is blinding me. Yet, it would explain Lu Xun's coldness—to push me away so I wouldn't know.

Taking a shaky breath, I continue languidly to Lu Xun's room. I feel exhausted, my earlier state of energy reduced to barely keeping me on my feet. I swallow thickly as I push open the door to his room without knocking. In my mind, I contemplate whether or not I should demand to know if the letter truly has the same meaning as I construed. When I step inside, I immediately search the room for him; however, I find the room empty. The bed is arranged neatly, almost as if no one has slept there for days. The desk is piled with stacks of papers. I blink, staggering to his desk. Then, a flash of gold catches my eye. An envelope, similar to the one in my hands, is tucked under a stack of papers with only a corner of the envelope peeking out. Judging by its crooked angle, I guess that Lu Xun shoved it under the pile hastily. My heart starts to race, thudding ominously. Squeezing my eyes shut, I fling open one of the drawers of his desk with a violent jerk. Inside, there are ivory and gold envelopes scattered at the base of the drawer. A choked gasp escapes my throat. Some are covered by loose pieces of paper. A cold sensation of nausea settles over as I stare, aghast. I clench my hand, unable to bear just looking at them. I quickly seal the envelope and slam it down on the table, taking in shaky breaths. Then, I flee his room—nearly tripping over my feet in my despair—like I'm trying to escape him altogether.

A stab to the heart and a knife to the back. Do I really exist to you at all?

Gradually, day by day, I lost the companionship of most of my friends. They seemed to be obsessing over the return of the princess or preparing for battle with immaculate plans. There are servants rushing about with endless chores, preparing for the princess's return. When I peered into one of the rooms a maid has just exited, there were silk sheets and blankets. The walls were plastered with expensive looking paper. There were polished, hand cut chairs scattered inside. I grimaced, thinking that this room wasn't finished. Every time I saw someone preparing for her arrival, it just contributed to my growing annoyance.

People ignored me as they had their own business to attend to. They only wanted me around when I could provide as some use to them. I went around lifting and carrying objects. I shook my head in disgust, thinking of how spoiled this girl could be. Or maybe it was like that for every royal—especially for one that has been away for a long time. I snorted as a group of servants scurried down the hall, carrying what appeared to be an expensive rice paper screen with cherry blossom trees painted on it. I think I saw about ten of those already... Other times, people only talked to me only to demand whether or not I've agreed to the plan regarding Lu Xun. It was not motivating.

Have you ever had a brokenhearted friend? That one friend who could never forget about her or him? That one friend who stayed in a dazed and stupefying state after they had their hearts broken? Each day they pondered the same question: Why? Perhaps you've been in this unfortunate situation. Well, I stayed like this. Maybe I was more fortunate. I wasn't exactly brokenhearted seeing as how we were never lovers. I just felt confused and empty. The case with people ignoring me didn't help the situation much.

Gan Ning had started bailing out on me. He claimed that he was needed for a water attack strategy. I was sinking deeper in my state loneliness and depression. It felt as if I was drowning; I was falling lower and lower into complete darkness: the more I fell, the less likely I would claw back up. Every day, I moved stiffly, grabbing a bucket and sponge. After that was the pitchfork and hay. It was the same monotonous routine. Once I was done, I moved myself to a little hill overlooking the palace and the fields. I was a little glad that I had this quiet little sanctuary. Things in the palace had gotten hectic and intense with each passing day. Strategists were constantly called to meeting rooms. Soldiers were always in the fields, hacking at each other with swords. Other soldiers were running laps in the field...and occasionally tripping, falling with their armor. I stayed in the stables, watching as everyone passed by me. Even Gan Ning had found himself called to more and more meetings—especially since he was skilled in the waters. I suppose I had become accustomed to his silent companionship. Preparation for the princess's return didn't make things any better. Sun Ce was ecstatic that his daughter was returning. However, he became grim as soon as his mind returned to the upcoming battle.

I felt a little uncertain about the return of the princess. Again, I could feel that dread in my stomach. In addition, her return would be a burden to the battle. The inhabitants of the palace would have to spend time making her feel welcome and protecting her; however, we can't afford to give her that luxury. We have to keep in mind: The more soldiers for the battle, the better. The only conciliatory thing I could keep in mind was that they couldn't possibly take her to the battle.

As for Lu Xun, things have not improved; in fact, things have probably been exacerbated. I saw less and less of him passing by these few days. As I've said, they've all gone to meetings and training. I smile wryly.

I'm a soldier. Yet, they all seem to forget about me quite easily. I let the ironic smile slip off my face. Am I even a soldier of Wu? Distracted, I don't hear the footsteps approach me from behind.

"Xin Ying."

I let my eyes glance at him—only momentarily. To prevent the numbing ache in my chest, I avert my eyes back into the sky. It's dark—twilight. Not dark, yet not light. Not completely safe, yet not completely dangerous.

"Hello," I breathe out, back facing him as I lean against the tree on my right.

There's moist grass beneath my hands.

"We need you for a meeting."

I laugh sardonically. "Isn't it funny?" He says nothing as I continue. "That recently, people only want me around when they need something?"

Maybe I hoped too much. Hoped that he would tell me that he truly loved me. Hoped that the letter from her meant nothing. Hoped that my world wouldn't crash. I learned that hope is dangerous.

I lean back on the tree, tipping my head back. The wind ruffles my hair again. I watch him, focusing on him clearly this time, making sure my expression is devoid of emotion. His face is pallid with shadows under his eyes. I am not completely taken aback. Planning for the battle has been intense. I've passed by the library a few times during the middle of the night, and I saw Zhou Yu scribbling away with heavy eyelids.

Lu Xun doesn't look at me. Instead, he keeps his gaze in the sky. I look back, lifting a hand to feel the breeze brush past my fingertips.

"We need your decision," he says, voice unwavering.

I sigh. "So you do."

Lu Xun stands there, arms crossed over his chest as he gazes into the distance.

"Tell me something," I say softly, shutting my eyes.

He remains silent and impassive.

"You're mad," I say simply.

He stands motionlessly. Finally, his gaze flickers over to me. "I'm not angry."

I sigh, slumping down in defeat.

"Oh. No, of course you're not. You're normally so distant," I say, sarcasm dripping heavily from my words.

His face hardens; he drops his gaze to the ground. The air stills as I'm left completely alone with him. I feel numb, but I will myself with all my strength to keep my gaze on him. You only lose when you admit defeat.

"I do everything for a reason," he says finally.

"Human emotions motivate actions," I counter with no inflection in my voice. I lean my cold cheek against the bark of the tree.

"So they do," he answers, settling himself down next to me. "But, those emotions don't have to be bad—jealousy, anger, frustration."

His eyes watch the sky wistfully. I look in the same direction as him to see a pair of sparrows fly side by side across the sky. I long to take his hand, but he looks so far away.

"Then, what's motivating you?" I ask.

It doesn't seem like Lu Xun hears me. He watches the sparrows as they fade into the distance. It is almost like he's watching someone he loves dearly part away.

"Let me tell you something I once heard," he says. "To love is to wreck and spoil. To make someone open to your selfishness. Perhaps, to sacrifice is to love. To keep someone you love away from danger…isn't that what you would do for them?"

I bite my lip. "I suppose so..."

Lu Xun smiles in satisfaction, but the smile did not truly reach his eyes. We sit in silence again, basking in the quiet, cool air.

"So. What am I needed for?" I ask, our backs facing each other as we watch the opposite direction.

"I was just asked to find you."

"I see," I say, standing up.

I feel dizzy as I stand. It's probably because I've been sitting too long. Lu Xun watches as I pick myself up off the ground. "The strategy room."

I nod briskly and start to walk off back into the direction of the palace. It's a beacon of light from the hill in the darkness. I glance back behind me sorrowfully, only seeing his silhouette against the darkness. "I'll do it. I just want you to know…"

"Know what?"

"Nothing." I shake my head dismissively, holding back the words that were on the tip of my tongue.

I trudge away to the palace without looking back again. The words I was about to say linger on my tongue with an acrid taste.

I want you to know that you are my everything.

And I'm terribly in love with you.

I push open the door to the strategy room. Inside, Zhou Yu and Zhuge Liang wait in tense silence. Being the only two people who occupy the room, it looks empty. The long, narrow table has scrolls and loose papers that are disarrayed. The chairs surrounding it are mostly bereft of people. Judging from the irritated expression on Zhou Yu's face, he is not happy to be in the same room as Zhuge Liang. Like Lu Xun, his face is gaunt with shadows protruding from under his eyes. Yet, he is studiously reviewing information on scrolls and papers. Meanwhile, Zhuge Liang appears to be oblivious of Zhou Yu's strong dislike of him or chooses to ignore it. Either way, Zhuge Liang seems to be in perfect health while those around him are not.

"Yes?" I ask. "You called?"

Zhuge Liang looks pleased that I arrived, dismissing the fact that I do not look happy. He gets straight to the point. "We need your response now. It would be too risky if we wait for you any longer."

I take my time to pull out a chair, creating a loud, screech against the floor. If this provokes his annoyance, Zhuge Liang does not show it. I must applaud him for his bluntness, though.

"All right," I say.

"You will do it, then?" he inquires.

"Yes."

Zhou Yu looks at me suspiciously, scrutinizing my expression. It seems like he doesn't believe I would be so indifferent in this situation. Zhuge Liang appears to be pleased.

"Excellent," he remarks smoothly, fanning himself. "Now. We must continue with our plan."

He nods towards Zhou Yu. "If you will."

Zhou Yu rolls his eyes, returning his gaze to me. The annoyed expression melts off his face, replaced by a grave one. "We will have you in the village. We'll send many people around to spread the news. When everyone knows that you are to be wed to Lu Xun, he will announce it personally. You'll spend the next few days in town preparing for it. The more the peasants and villagers are involved, the better. This event will distract them from the battle. Hopefully, Wei spies will buy it as well."

"Won't the spies get suspicious of why we only came out to tell them about the marriage?" I inquire dully.

Zhou Yu pauses. "I suppose that's true."

We both look over at Zhuge Liang instinctively. The Shu strategist continues fanning himself nonchalantly.

"Make a plan to help out the villagers," he says dismissively. "Distribute food. Build houses. It'll also distract them. It will also make them more content. Then, pretend that Master Lu Xun decided to propose in the middle of your charity work."

I meet Zhou Yu's gaze lazily. I don't particularly care what they do. It's not as if they need me around for anything else.

"You do that," I say without care.

I lean back in my chair, peering at the both of them. "Are we done now?"

"I suppose so," hesitates Zhou Yu. "We'll let you know about the snake ambush later on. Just prepare to have a wedding."

I look at him with lifeless eyes. "It's not as if it's real. It's a fake wedding. What's there to prepare for?"

I make my way out of the room briskly. Immediately, I see another group of maids multiple stacks of folded silk robes with colors of the rainbow. My expression twists up into one of disgust and frustration. How many things could this girl possibly need?!

I never imagined that my wedding would be with someone who didn't love me. I never even imagined that I would have a wedding.

As I pass by a window, I glance out to see that it's dark now. The sky is coated with a deep purple color. I no longer hear the birds' cries as the soar through the sky. Instead, I can hear the faint chirping of the crickets. Although the birds have already retired, the stampeding of the training soldiers is still there. I might as well join them.

I stroll out of the palace, into the training area outdoors. With the bright orb of light in the sky, the soldiers aren't totally blind. I see Lu Meng and Taishi Ci discussing something. Then, there are soldiers sparring with each other. Zhao Yun and and Ma Chao smacking each other's weapons into a deadlock. They struggle with gritted teeth, digging their feet into the dirt. However, Ma Chao seems to be more at a disadvantage as he isn't on horseback. There are sheens of sweat glistening on each of their faces as they continue to struggle. A few yards away are Gan Ning and Ling Tong swinging their weapons at each other. They seem to be half asleep but are still able to land some blows on each other. Surrounding all of them are other pairs of warriors attempting to overcome each other with their own respective weapons.

"Ah, Lady Xin Ying."

I turn around to see Taishi Ci approaching me.

I nod in acknowledgment. "Lord Taishi Ci."

His brows furrow in puzzlement. "How come you are out here at this time, my lady?"

I am taken aback by the question. "Um. I believe that I am a soldier as well."

Tashi Ci seems to be at a loss of words. "But, Master Lu..."

"Master Lu...Meng?" I ask, glancing at Lu Meng who is focused on disarming another general.

"No, no," he says quickly, averting his eyes. "Nothing."

I look at him dubiously, but I don't press him any further. Taishi Ci scans around, appraising the effort everyone seems to be putting in. He frowns as his eyes crosses Gan Ning and Ling Tong, but he does nothing.

"You are here to train, then?"

I nod, inwardly thinking about why else I could here. He strides towards a rack holding an array of weapons ranging from swords to spears and tridents. Taishi Ci grabs his weapon—a pair of twin rods. He gestures for me to select one. I take the first one I see without thinking—a trident. I might as well learn how to use another weapon. Besides, my sword is in my room.

Standing still with a loose grip on the trident, I wait for Taishi Ci to ready himself. He does, charging at me with his twin rods ready to swing. I tighten my grip on the trident and grit my teeth. Then, I rush forward to meet him. Immediately, he swings his weapon at my head. I duck, dropping to the ground with my knuckles grazing the dirt ground. One thing that a warrior always has to remember is to be unexpected. As long as you aren't predictable, the enemy won't win. I swing my legs at his knee, cringing as I make contact with his armor. Taishi Ci staggers momentarily, but he recovers.

He sets his eyes on me, expression twisting into one of determination. I leap backwards with the trident in my hands as he attempts to swing at my stomach. I hold the trident behind me as the breeze blows my hair away from my face. I'm on one knee now, right palm on the ground. Dashing forward, I attempt to drive the trident at his neck. However, with one deliberate flick, he sends the trident flying a few feet away from us.

"Forfeit?" he grins, towering over me in a slightly menacing way.

I grit my teeth once again. "Not yet."

I dive rashly for the trident, hand brushing against the handle. I know he is behind me, ready to disarm me again. Once I grab the trident, I roll away, smacking the long handle of the trident against Taishi Ci's rods. It's a deadlock. The handle of the trident acts as a barrier between his weapon and me. I struggle. But, since I'm not on my feet, I'm at a disadvantage. I push against him while attempting to stand up from my sitting position. Figuring that I can't win like this, I kick him in the stomach and roll away. Taishi Ci becomes momentarily distracted as he tries to steady himself. I throw the trident, the blade snagging a part of his cloth trousers and pinning it to the dirt ground. Part of the blade and handle protrudes out of the ground. Taishi Ci tries to free himself by tugging his leg away, an annoyed expression on his face. In the next few seconds, I find myself jumping on his back with the crook of my elbow hooked around his neck—a chokehold. We both know that it's not a complete victory since I don't have a weapon, and it's unlikely that I'll be able to choke an enemy to death in this situation. However, it's somewhat of a victory in this duel.

Taishi Ci starts to speak but is interrupted by everyone starting to trample past us. Immediately, I realize that everyone is going for a run—at the same time. The noise is deafening like a hundred elephants on a stampede. I barely hear his words even though I lean towards him. After a few seconds, I give up and gesture to tell him that I'm joining everyone else. Before he can answer, I take off, almost colliding with someone.

The next few minutes are not pleasant. I keep focusing on how to avoid stepping on the heels on the people in front of me. Impatiently, I shove my way past and in front of them, somehow finding myself squished between Ling Tong and Gan Ning when I reach the front part of the crowd.

"Nice of you to join us!" he laughs, slinging an arm around my shoulders despite the fact that we're running—practically sprinting.

It's truly refreshing to have my friends around me for the first time in a few weeks. Basked in the moonlight, we trample over the dirt floor with nothing else but the gentlest breeze. Yet, I can feel something ominous lurking in the shadows—a feeling of trepidation. It's the calm before a storm. Or like when the antagonist of a book falls too quickly.

I push his hand off, not harshly. I simply want any excess weight off me so I can be free of burdens.

"I do recall that I was the one who was deserted," I say plainly, surprised by the slight coldness in my words. As soon as those words leave my mouth, I regret it. It's not their fault that they are called to battle meetings. Inwardly, I rebuke myself for sounding like Lu Xun that day—prim and distant.

They look startled, a wave of consternation washing over their faces. However, as quickly as their surprise comes, it disappears. Gan Ning bellows in laughter, his usual carefree demeanor showing itself. Ling Tong, too, joins in with Gan Ning. Their raucous laughter is drowned out by the thundering of everyone's footsteps.

"Great to know you missed us," grins Gan Ning, hand reaching over to ruffle my hair. I smack his hand away, somewhat miffed.

"That's right. We haven't seen you much with all this going on." Ling Tong gestures around him. I know that he's speaking about the battle, the endless strategies, and incessant training sessions. There's also the issue of Sun Qi's arrival. Even the mention of her name in my head brings an ugly resentment in my chest. It grows with every thought of that letter I read. Ling Tong's words slice into my thoughts and cuts me from my dazed state. "Do you have an update for us about that marriage proposal?"

I blink a few times, clearing away my other thoughts. I struggle to recall Ling Tong's question. "Er. Yeah... Can you repeat that?"

"Marriage proposal?"

"Uh. Yeah. I agreed to it," I say, letting my face slip into a blank mask, devoid of emotion. I keep my eyes wide open to stop any tears from forming. Yet, anything that's related to him brings my heart to a painful stop. Keeping my breathing even, I meet my friends' gazes. "They needed a distraction, after all."

I shrug nonchalantly while making sure my voice is unwavering. Ling Tong looks at Gan Ning with an ironic smile. He leans toward Gan Ning in a conspiratory fashion but not out of my earshot. "You'd think they would have gotten together by themselves. I would never have imagined that Zhuge Liang would be the matchmaker!"

Gan Ning jabs Ling Tong with his elbow, the curve of his mouth quirking. "Nice one!" However, Ling Tong does not foresee his cohort's sudden attack and stumbles over his feet. Right before Ling Tong hits the ground, Gan Ning seizes his upper arm and pulls. Ling Tong recovers with haste for fear of being trampled over by the hundreds of soldiers behind him. It would be like being run over by a thousand one ton boulders. Instead of yelling at Gan Ning like I expected, they share a knowing glance and snicker like two schoolboys sharing a secret. Unconsciously, a ghost of a smile crosses my lips.

Once upon a time as an Assassin, I had heard stories of Gan Ning of the bells and the son of Ling Tong. The two warriors were great in the martial arts without a doubt. However, rumor had it that they were constantly at each others' throats with perpetual belligerence. Their friendly actions now imply that their hostility was finite. They are inseparable now; they always having each others' backs.

Observing them is like being an outsider; their exchanges are so esoteric. It seems as if they know what the other is thinking. To have an indissoluble friendship is a blessing. But, to have it broken and shattered would be unbearable—death.

I shake those dismal thoughts out of my head. I refuse to allow desolation caused by my current situation overpower me. Peering at my two friends, I voice what I was thinking earlier.

"I would have," admits Ling Tong with an impish grin, "yelled at him, that is. Possibly even lunged at him for it." He doesn't seem abashed with this honest remark but speaks casually as if discussing what type of training we should do. "But," he adds with a shrug, "that was before."

"As if I, the great Gan Ning of the bells, would let you attack me!" exclaims Gan Ning with another light jab a Ling Tong's side. Alert this time, Ling Tong dodges swiftly, returning with a swing toward his head. Gan Ning ducks, and they continue with a few more punches, not looking anymore exhausted.

"Xin Ying." Ling Tong observes me with a contemplative expression. I glance at him questioningly. The beads of sweat are becoming more prominent on his forehead, illuminated farther by the moonlight. A smudge of dirt is smeared lightly across his cheek—kicked up from the ground, I assume. He asks me a question. "Are you and Lu Xun on or off?"

My confusion shows on my face as he moves to clarify. "I mean... Is there a romantic relationship between the both of you right now?"

The words on my tongue are stolen away as I stare at Ling Tong. Clenching my fist, I work my words carefully through gritted teeth. "Perhaps you should ask him." I avert my gaze somewhere else: I watch the back of the soldier in front of me. Although I attempt to repress anger from bursting within me, I can't help the murderous expression on my face. Gan Ning brushes against me: a conciliatory action, although it does nothing to ebb the rage churning inside me. Every time he's brought up, it just stokes to the fire inside, soon to be an untamed conflagration.

Gan Ning glances down at me. "He means that one day, both of you are together and happy. The next day you are angry at each other. The day after that, you guys are up against each other. It's hot one moment and cold the next. You both are very fickle." Ling Tong nods in agreement while I look away, glaring mutinously at the ground. "It's also your personalities," adds Gan Ning, not unkindly. "Hot and cold—capricious."

"Maybe you should ask him if he has bipolar disorder," I snap crossly, rubbing my cold hands together. Despite the heat caused by my movements, my hands refuse to warm up.

I hear Gan Ning snort. Hypocrite.

Shooting him a sharp look, I wipe sweat from my eyes. The climax of the run has passed. Our sprints gradually turn into brisk jogs. Surrounding me is the smell of salt, heavy panting, and rhythmic stomps. I make a mental note to indulge in a cleansing bath later: a remedy for my soon overused muscles.

We halt once we reach our starting point. Our fellow soldiers drop to the ground and begin doing various exercises such as push-ups, sit-ups, and crunches. Gan Ning and Ling Tong imitate them while I stretch.

In the distance, I can make out a lone figure, with arms full of fabric, scurrying across the stretch of dirt towards the palace. Despite my initial disgust for the commotion about the princess's return, I can't help but admire the maid's ability to mince while balancing the heavy load in her arms.

"What are you looking at?" Ling Tong follows my gaze to the harassed maid; his expression contorts into one of exasperation. "I know what you're thinking," he says, a sardonic grin appearing. "The princess is a bit spoiled, huh?"

"A bit?" I raise an eyebrow dubiously. "Have you seen the amount of stuff she has?" My voice rises, vexation rolling off me in wild waves. A deep sensation of animosity consumes me, and I quickly repress it, choosing to glower at the distance to vent my spleen. "Does Sun Ce even know about all this?" I demand, sweeping my arms with a flourish.

I drop to the ground, slamming my hands on the dirt ground and thrusting myself up and down vigorously—my version of a push-up fueled by anger.

"He probably knows and doesn't care much," says Gan Ning insouciantly. He pauses as he comes up from a sit-up and looks me in the eye. "You can't exactly blame him. He hasn't seen his daughter for a few years and would delight in spoiling her."

I roll my eyes, not bothering to mask my disdain. "If that's the case, why did he even let her go away?"

Gan Ning shrugs and returns to his sit-ups. I take a deep breath, trying to swallow down my acrimony, and shooting a vicious glare at a soldier to my left who is staring at me. "What?" He quickly ducks away meekly.

"Your anger and bellicose will give you wrinkles; as a result, you should stop," says Gan Ning dully, his gaze holding onto mine. "I know how much you women love your looks," he adds for good measure. "I remember how Cao Pi's wife was blathering on about how many products she's going to have to use to get rid of that "scar" I gave her. It was just a cut, and it was this—" Gan Ning holds his index finger and thumb about an inch apart "—small."

Giving Gan Ning a long stare, I crack a reluctant smile, washing away my hostility like an ocean waves washing away sand.

"Finally," he winks. "I was beginning to think your rage made you non-human." A contemplative expression crosses his face, and he strokes his chin thoughtfully. "That butterfly boy did it too," he recalls, "prattling on about how his beautiful skin was ruined." He shakes his head. "Honestly, they could've gotten themselves killed like that."

A laugh frees itself from my throat. "You mean Zhang He?" I chortle, collapsing from a push-up.

Gan Ning and Ling Tong share an inconspicuous glance. Ling Tong mutters, "Hot and cold." However, he isn't discreet enough, and I returning his muttering with a scowl.

Ling Tong feigns a cough, and his face turns solemn. "Oh. I heard someone talking in the dining hall about the princess's arrival," he says, hoping to reconcile with me. "Apparently, the princess used to get herself into troubling situations so they decided to send her to a school to help her reform."

Gan Ning and I stop to stare at him; our interest is now piqued.

"What do you mean by "troubling situations"?" I inquire curiously, speaking for both myself and Gan Ning.

Ling Tong shrugs. "I'm not too sure about the details, but they said she used to wreak havoc in the village and cause mischief in the kitchens," explains Ling Tong. He frowns. "I'm pretty sure this 'mischief' wasn't pleasant, though."

For some inexplicable reason, I feel satisfied—satiated. Perhaps knowing the faults and flaws of that pompous princess pacifies me in this sickening way. Without a doubt, I am undeniably a selfish, spiteful person.

Hey everyone! Okay, so bear with me on my random updates. School stuff takes up a lot of time, and I tend to get a bit lazy when it comes to typing up my stories. However, I have been doing a little research on how to make my story more descriptive and well written. Right now, I need your help. I've been having this problem where I'm looking for a particular word, I know its definition, but I simply can't remember the word. So if any of you guys recognize the word I'm looking for, please let me know (leave it in a review, PM me, or something like that). The definition of this word is "moving in a manner as if one is ashamed or trying to avoid others". It's something like where someone is doing something sneaky. Keep in mind that it's one word and not a phrase. You guys are awesome, by the way. I've gotten so many reviews, favorites, and follows, and that's what motivated me to type up the rest of this chapter. I hope you guys enjoyed it, and happy readings! Remember to review!