Based upon a comment my-little-yellowbird made on tumblr
She didn't know what she'd expected really. She'd ignored his plea and taken the bus, she'd gotten lost and now she was walking cold and alone in the mist. She'd considered waiting in case he turned up at the sanatorium,truth be told it was the main reason she'd phoned him, but Chummy had sounded rather desperate when she was talking to Doctor Turner and so she assumed Dolly Smart had gone into labour. The Doctor would be tied up for a while. Oh it had been so good to hear Chummys voice again, Trixie had excitedly informed her of their friends up coming birth and explained that as such the tall nurse would be unable to visit. It had now been 7 months since she'd last seen Chummy and had missed her dreadfully. Nevermind...she'd be back in Poplar soon...So long as they didn't all reject her completely for her decision. Which was very possible.
Had she misinterpreted the words he had written to her? He'd never explicitly explained how he'd felt, only implied it and in relation to the held gazes and the eyes that always seemed to follow her around the room and the hand kiss...oh that kiss..well she had been certain of his feelings. And this was real life not one of the novels Trixie liked to read. Doctor Turner was hardly going to appear out of the mist, her knight in shining armour, profess his love for her and wrap her up in his coat now was he? She'd see him back in Poplar and they would talk. They could make a start. Oh but what if she had misunderstood? What if he was sat in his office chuckling at her odd behaviour in calling him? She felt sick. Had she left behind her life for nothing? Had she risked the only home she had for a mild intrigue from the Doctor? Had she betrayed Him? No. No she had left the Order for herself. It wasn't her path. God had given her this new path as Shelagh Mannion and she was going to walk it with or without the sisters, and the nurses and The Doctor...without Timothy. Oh Timothy. Such a darling boy, a boy who could very well be her son if she had understood his father correctly, a boy who had sent her the butterfly she had in her bag. She could be his mum. The thought excited her more than she expected. With this move she could have a stepson and children of her own and grandchildren. She could be a part of a family, an actual family.
She hadn't been a part of a family since her father had died when she was 14. The children's home had been cold and dank. Nobody spoke to each other, nobody bonded. You went to school, you came home and ate then were set to chores and locked in your rooms. Nonnatus House had come close but she was always so much younger than her Sisters, her ideas too radical, her voice too quiet. Only Sister Evangelina, and later Sister Julienne, had had any time for her and she had been glad that they had been the two to remain on,along with Sister Monica Joan who was one of the lesser problems, when their Order had spilt into two and the nuns who had scorned her had gone to Sussex. But even then she could never feel fully familial with them. And the nurses...She had always wished to be closer friends with them but in the early years they viewed her as the strange little nun with the silly accent. It had only been after Trixie, and then Cynthia, had joined that it began to change. They actually spoke to her and she found friends. It had gotten even worse when Jenny and Chummy joined. Perhaps that was when the unease had started. She finally saw what she was missing out on, was finally allowed on the outskirts of life, had a tantalising taste of freedom. But she had been a nun. And they respected that. Sometimes she wished they didn't. Just once couldn't they have invited her into their rooms as they giggled and she could join them though. If she was allowed to continue on as a nurse that was. If they even wanted to talk to her after her betrayal. If the Doctor even loved her as desperately as she could now admit to herself she did him.
Her thoughts were interrupted as the rumble of an engine began to build up behind her. She turned. What looked like a green car was appearing out of the fog, it looked like there was a child leaning out if the window. She gasped. Could it be? Could it really be that he had come for her? The mist cleared and she saw the driver.
Probably going to be a 3/4 parter
Reviews appreciated xxxx