Haha, sorry about the grammar and the mess I made with this character, no beta oversight is dangerous indeed!

This chapter goes a little bit into Fenris' problem, mostly because I find myself having a soft spot for him. And Anders, but they have their own kind of turmoil. Fenris' desire for freedom is easier for me to understand than having another spirit inside one body, one that drives you crazy with the need to kill all Templars. *sigh*

Bioware/EA owns everything.

"What can I do for you, Blondie?" Varric asked, motioning for Anders to sit as he try to guess the mage's reason for coming to him. From what he have heard earlier, perhaps Anders wanted him to keep him update on the status of the Magisters, or the hunt for the relic. Or a hard drink, Varric chuckles inwardly. From how haggard the mage look, Varric deducted that the underground clinic must have been busier than normal.

"Magisters running amok, Templars on a witch hunt," He mumbled, crossing his arms with an annoyed look on his face. "And she's chasing after him."

"Magisters in Kirkwall?" Varric frowned. "What are you talking about? And who is chasing whom?"

"We have some lead, and managed to found a viper's nest full of Magisters." Anders sighed, slumping in his chair and running a hand over his face. "We managed to snatch one of them for information, but that turned sour. The Magister turned out to be an old acquainted of Fenris, and that ruffled his feathers."

"Ah," Varric blink, slowly regarding the mage before him. "Well, if feelings need to be sooth, Hawke's probably the best bet." He said, wondering Anders' reason for being sullen. Did he missed something before? Hawke is mostly close to her friends, and her way of caring was to be there when and where she is needed. He didn't think much of it, seeing as nobody else objected to the invasion of personal space, but had he overlooked something that was in development?

"She doesn't think much of her own personal safety, even though she should! Fenris is dangerous."

"So are you, Blondie. If you were to keep score, your kill counts is probably as high as his."

"He was mad, all of us could see he was mad. Yet she went after him, intending to baby him."

"Hmm, now that's an interesting image." The dwarf chuckled, more amused at Anders than the picture of Fenris as a baby, with Hawke hovering protectively above him. Like a mother bird, how befitting. "What's really bothering you, Blondie?"

"He has shown that his words are not trustworthy." Anders groaned, relaying the event to Varric. "Now you can see why I am worrying for her. He selfishly did what he want, not caring for honor and Hawke's values."

"It was a Tevinter Magister, Blondie." Varric patted the mage's shoulder. "Granted, it doesn't mean he should break his promise, but given what the Magister did to him, he's entitled to payback. Beside, I don't see anyway to let the Magister live. She's too dangerous, to us, and to all of Kirkwall. She have seen your faces, Blondie, and undoubtedly heard your names; she will probably go after us if she was free."

Anders was still frowning, with his lips downward, and Varric couldn't help but chuckle at the way the mage pout. "You should work that look more often, Blondie. You'll have all the ladies climbing over themselves trying to console you."

"Be serious, Varric."

"Alright, alright." Varric hold up a hand in surrender. "I understand your concern. However, Hawke have a mind of her own, and she's more than capable of defending herself. If she deemed Fenris safe to handle, who am I to question her judgement?"

"You should!" He snapped. "I am worry that Fenris would drive her into danger."

"We face danger every day, Blondie. We even went into the dark road before, yet I haven't heard you complain until now." Varric leaned his head to one side. "What change? Are you….?"

"What?" Anders squinted, throwing a questioning look to the dwarf, until Varric's question sunk in, and his eyes widen. "No! I mean...not that way! I thought she and Fenris…..You know, that's why I'm worrying for her."

"What? No!" Varric shook his head vehemently. "Of all the…! Wait, you've known Hawke for how long? Why would you think-"

"Wasn't that why she's so….I don't know, familiar with him?" Sebastian's voice rang with the recognizable brogue, and his body followed, walking into Varric's room.

"Really? I'm surprised at the both of you." Varric raised an eyebrow.

"The way she acted, I also assumed that Hawke and Fenris was an item."

"Wait, what?" The question was almost a growl, and Hawke walked in, glaring at all the occupants of the room.

"We are discussing your love life, Hawke." Varric laughs, seeing the murderous look she was giving them all. "Want to join? These gentlemen thought that you and Fenris is an item."

"As titillating as it is, I don't think I want to discuss my love life right now. Especially not in front of you, Sebastian." She narrowed her eyes at him. Of the group, he was the more reserved member, and she had respected that. She had expected a lecture concerning moral values, not intimate details of her life.

"Maybe not, but I am concerned." The ex-Prince cleared his throat, color flushing his cheek, but he refused to back down from her glare. "After today, I would advise your..erhm..romantically involvement with Fenris."

"Remember, you started this first. I am not going to recite any chant or go to a confession after this." She retorted, going over to poke at his chestplate. His shiny white chestplate. "You should know better than to pass judgement. Fenris is as entitled to revenge as you did. Also," She glared at Anders. "Fenris is not a bad person. And for the records, I am not romantically involved with him."

Varric chuckled, earning himself a glare from Hawke. "I tried to set them straight." He said, holding up his hands.

Hawke rolled her eyes, then climb up the table, sitting crosslegged in the middle of it like a display. "I know you meant well, but even if I am involved with Fenris, it shouldn't warrant an intervention." She said, holding up a hand when Anders started to speak. "Fenris is going through a tough time, and I am trying to help him. I am sorry that you was disappointed how it turned out, and so am I; but given the circumstances, we would have kill the Magister anyway."

"That doesn't excuse his brutality." Anders replied, crossing his arms.

"No, it doesn't, but I would have done the same. The only difference is that I don't have his ability to reach into someone else's body." She glowered.

"I...see your point." Sebastian conceded, though his lips was pinched and his voice strained.

Hawke's face soften, leaning forward to lay a hand on the side of his neck, caressing the underside of his jaw. "I'm sorry I brought the subject up, Sebastian, but I hope you can understand where he's coming from. You are both my friends, and I'd hate to pick sides. Beside, Wicked Grace is more fun when I can fleece both of you out of your clothes." She winked, stifling a smile at the colors on his cheeks.

Varric smiled at the sight, but Anders snorted, and he looked over to see the mage rolling his eyes. The dwarf raised an eyebrow, and Anders sighed, shaking his head instead of answering the silent question.

"She's far from helpless, Blondie." Varric said quietly. "And she hate to be smothered. If you have her interest at heart, I would advise not treating her like a fragile glass rose."

"Maker's breath!" Anders exclaimed, slamming a fist on the table, gaining the attention of Hawke and Sebastian. "I don't have designs on her, for heaven's sake. I'm just worry, that's all."

"Awww." Hawke drawl, scooting over to kiss his cheek. "How sweet of you. What's this about designs on me?"

"That dwarf mistook my intention." Anders said, his lips curled, and he shook his head. "I think of you like family, and I worry for your safety. There is nothing else beyond that."

"How adorable!" Hawke chuckled, wagging her eyebrows at him. "You can adopt me anytime. Should I start calling you big brother now?"

Anders rolled his eyes at her, and swatted her shoulder good naturedly. "With all this talk, it's starting to sound like we're in a love triangle, unwarrantedly."

"Wasn't my fault you stormed in here like a jealous lover, Blondie." Varric shrugged.

"You are just searching for ideas for your books." Anders accused.

Varric shrugged, a grin on his lips.

Anders turned his attention back to Hawke, shaking his fingers at her. "And you need to behave yourself."

"Yes, big brother." Hawke grinned.

"You jest, but my concerns is just. You know where to find me if you need me, I'll leave it at that."

xxx

After Anders and Sebastian left, Hawke waited until Varric cleared out his table of his writing equipment before she voiced her own concerns.

"They have the right to worry," She told him, running a jerky hands through her hair, succeeding only to tangle the long locks further. "You should have seen him, the look in his eyes gave me chills."

"Why have you gone after him, if he worries you?" Varric closed the chest containing his scripts and went to his writing table, opening a drawer and picking up a wooden comb. He walk over to Hawke, holding the comb out to her. She had spend enough time in his suite that it was easier for both of them to keep some of her things here, where she needed them more often than not.

"I'm not worried that he will harm me," She took the comb, quickly working out the tangles. "I'm worried that he will harm himself. He doesn't think he's capable of breaking free of Danarius, despite his strength."

"Hmm." Varric sat down on the bed next to Hawke, resting his elbows on his knees. "Physical strength and mental strength are two different thing, Hawke."

"I know that, and I want to help him. He thinks he will not be free until Danarius is dead, I just don't know how to convince him otherwise."

"You can't fight other people's battles for them, you know that." He told her, glancing over when she poked him with the comb. He took it, studying it without really seeing it. That was a lesson he had learned early on.

"I know." Hawke sighed, tucking her hair behind her ears. "It's hard standing by and watching him hurting, Varric."

"Sounding like another mess you want to step in. Are you sure that's wise?"

"Well, I can't just do nothing."

"You have to pick your battle, Chuckles."

"I…I don't know, Varric. He's my friend, his battles are as much mine as anything." She hesitated, mulling over the options, but only seeing a few of them. She absolutely know that it is Fenris' battle, and he will have to fight it sooner or later. She cannot fight his battle for him, and he would hate her if she try. The most thing she can do is support him as much as she can, lend him her strength when and where he needed it.

"Before you think too hard, Chuckles, I have something for you." He said, walking over to his desk, pulling out a long drawer to reveal a small stack of books, which he carried over to her and unceremoniously dumped them next to her on the bed.

"What-"

"Research. Read these and tell me you are still interested; though if I know you, it probably would stoke your curiousity more. Never say I didn't warn you, they can get graphical."

She looked at the book, gathering them up. There was five volumes in total, varying in thickness and length. She opened a random book, reading a handwritten page. "Duty is paramount in Qunari culture, and their society is seen as a living entity, whose wellbeing is the responsibility of all. Each person is like a drop of blood in the veins of the being, and they must not do what is best for them, but what is best for the creature." She read, then closed the book and raised an eyebrow at him.

"You want to know more about them, I found you some books that explain some of the customs." He shrugged, getting up and walk over to his desk, where he returned the comb to its storing place, and pour drinks for the both of them. When he went to handed her one of the drinks, his gaze was evaluating her. "I had a talk with the Arishok, seems like he didn't understand why you turned down his offer."

"Yes, well..." Hawke took the drink, downing half of it in one go. "If he had ask, instead of ordering me around, I would have gladly accepted his offer."

"That's all?" He snorted. "You've been around the noble too much, Hawke."

"I know." She groaned, exhaling shakily. "He...brings out something in me that I don't understand. Half the time he frustrate me, the other half...Well, the other half I want to kiss him senseless. I guess I was overreacting when he told me that I should see how the Qunari works. Maker's breath, Varric, I can barely look at him without blushing like a school girl. It's embarrassing."

Varric chuckled, patting the top of her head. "You're doing alright, kid. First crush is always the hardest."

"I'm not sure how I feel about it." She shook her head, a little overwhelmed now that she is actually considering it. It wasn't something she ever thought of, yet it does appeal to her. and the more she think of it, the more tempting the offer is. She could learn more about how the Qunari operates, at the same time satisfying her curiosity about the Arishok, and give Fenris the opportunity to come to term with himself. Now you're just making excuses, she rolled her eyes at herself. It still rub her wrong the way Arishok had assumed she would follow his dictation. He had infringed on her rights to make decisions for herself, and she cannot let that go.

"Think of it this way, it'll be your first real slumber party." Varric chuckle.

"I have had slumber parties with you and Isabella." She said, her tone clipped, still irked and trying to work out her irritation. It's the principles, she told herself, and he meant well.

"We don't count."

"Even the dirty stories?"

"Especially the dirty stories." Varric grinned. "I'm picturing you braiding the giants' hair right now, and coming up with nothing. It's up to you to tell me how that goes, Chuckles."

Even after Varric's encouragement, she was too restless to consider a proper answer to the Arishok. She also tried to read some of the book, but her attention was elsewhere, and she gave up after a while.

"Think you can sleep?" Varric asked, taking the books from her and put them on his writing table.

"Probably, it's been a long day."

"You can turn in early, then. I have a little thing I need to attend to, you don't have to wait up." He said, scribbled onto a piece of paper and stuffed it into his sleeve.

"Do you need me to come along?" She asked, eyes following the paper and the movement of his hands.

"No need, it's just some minor details I need to confirm. It would sort itself out, but I want to make sure it's finished sooner." He smiled, turning toward the mirror and smoothed his hair down. "Sleep, I'll try not to wake you when I return."

Hawke sighed, but nodded. Varric left, closing the door behind him. Hawke went to sit on the edge of his bed, letting her mind wander. It had been a long day, and she was tired, yet she was not in the least bit sleepy. For once, she examine the way she behave around her friends.

Hawke has always been doting toward those she held dear, and with the way she grew up, the matter of gender never came up. She was always too ready to jump into mud puddles, too ready to play rough houses with her brother and the neighbors' children. She can match any illicit story she heard with a bawdier one, she could outdrink the most alcoholic of the drunkards, and she was always too ready to get into a fight. No man she'd met had really consider her a woman - she herself did not think of herself in gender-specific terms. She was none-too-shy about sleeping whenever and wherever she pleases, not caring if it was proper or not. She is a tad bit affectionate without much regard for personal space, and those she hugged or stayed close to had never voice their objection, so that was a topic that never came up. It was this kind of personable personality that allows her to understand people, to see how people operates, and enables her to get right to the heart of problems, as oppose to the superficial pretense that people put up. It had helped her make quick work of deciding who to trust, and whose words she shouldn't take at face value.

Why am I even bothered by this? She wondered, standing up to pace the room. The subject never came up, and she had not spare a thought to how strange her actions would seem to others. Thinking back on her interactions with Fenris, she could not think of anything that would make it appeared that she was attracted to him; and neither does his actions ever make her think the same. In fact, most of her encounters with her friends was the same; she was curious as to what would make Sebastian and Anders thought as they did. Fenris was attractive enough, she supposed, and some might fall for his aloofness, but she had rather thought of him as a dear friend, the same way that she feel about Isabella, Varric, and the rest of the group. She haven't met anyone that captivate her in that way.

It led her thought back to the Arishok. He was the first person that she had really troubled with in so long, and the newness of it caught her off-guard before - which was why she keep wanting to clash with him on multiple fronts. As much as he fascinates her, he also rouses her fight-or-flight response; she refused to flee, and that had been that.

She paused in the middle of her pacing, fingers touching her lips. She could still feel the firmness of his lips even now, felt the strange sensations that ran through her when their lips touch. The kiss, if it could be called that, was as chaste as Sebastian ever since he wore the Andraste belt buckle, and yet she had never been more aware of a man than that brief moment. Judging from the Arishok's reaction, he was just as startled as she was by the desire that welled up between them. He was the first person that sparked her interest, big time, and she wondered if there is such a thing in the Qunari. They all look like they are carved from stone, and she wondered if they could care.

Maybe not in the way that I am used to, she sighed, but their connection to each other is deep, so there might be something after all.

She started her pacing again, worrying her lower lip. Am I crazy to even considering this? She wondered. Her interest in him had been something that took her by surprise; though her interest in the Qun's teaching was genuine, she had no intention of converting. However, it was not all academic, and she worried that she will, for the first time, mix business with pleasure. Not that he was hiring me to do anything, she shook her head at herself, the grumpy ox. She wasn't sure how to proceed. Nevertheless, she is determined on one thing: despite her attraction to him, she will not bend to his will.

Feeling to tight-sprung to sleep, she grabbed her jacket from Varric's closet and went out. She had an idea, and she need to talk to Fenris about it.

xxx

The elf was sitting cross-legged in front of the hearth when she get to his mansion. He sat motionless, staring at a bottle of wine.

"You're making the wine blush." She said, coming to sit next to him. He heaved out a sigh, barely moving. She purse her lips, poking at his shoulder. "Talk to me, Fenris."

"What else is there to say?" He said quietly.

"Plenty." She pulled up her legs, resting her chin on her knees. "The weather, the food in Kirkwall, the nobles, the market. Take your pick."

"None I wish to talk about." He replied.

He was so still, and his face was downcast, his shoulder drooping, his stare was empty, like he was far away. She expected this, but she had hoped their talk earlier gave him some peace. How arrogant of me, she shook her head. "How about our romantic bond?"

"Our...what?" His head turned to her, and he scowled at her, his face wrinkled into the most adorable shocked expression she've ever seen.

"Aren't you good for the ego." She laughs, feeling better that she was able to bring him out of his brooding mood.

"I...Uh, I…..You're a beautiful woman, Hawke. And I…." He stumbled over word, his body stiff. He sat upright, hands gripping his knees. His eyes were wide, blinking rapidly.

"Your face was priceless." She laughed, her whole body shaking with mirth.

"Is there a reason for this?" He narrowed his eyes.

"It's amusing." She was still grinning widely. He rolled his eyes at her. She was surprised that he had took it seriously, because he knew of her fascination with the Arishok. "Though, I have something to ask you."

He continues to glare at her, resuming his previous pose with his back straighter.

"Do you mind my, erhm, touchy-feely way?" She asked. "You are not much for being touch, and I'm wondering if I'm being too forward sometimes?" He have the most reason to dissent her physical affection; with his emotionally stunted way, he does not express himself, not letting himself open up to others, or even acknowledge the feelings he have. Perhaps that was why she tried so much harder to draw him out, she supposed, to let him get used to being closed to another person.

"I'll let you know." He said, frowning. "What is this really about?"

"Never you mind, just want to make sure." She wave her hand dismissively, then pointed to the bottle. "Why were you having a staring contest with the bottle?" His ease of acceptance does say much for their friendship. He had allowed her closer than any other, and she hope that in time, more will see him more than an elf with a dark past.

He sighed, turning his face to the hearth, the flickering light adding a starkness to his expression. Hawke read the melancholy there, and it pulled at her heart.

"What are you thinking of?" She asked, moving the bottle so she can sit closer.

"My past." He replied, his voice flat. "Or as much as I can remember. There was always a nagging feeling that I was forgetting something, and I did - not just about myself. I have a sister, if you can believe the words of a Magister."

His words revealed the conflict in him, and even without asking, Hawke comprehend what he wanted to do. However, it looks like he wanted a nudge. "It could be true." She said, running her hand through his white hair. He sighed deeply, closing his eyes and made an appreciative noise in his throat. "The only way to know for sure is to find out. It couldn't hurt."

"It sounds like a trap to me." He snorted. "If I indeed have a sister, Danarius would know of her. I know what he would do; if he wanted me, he would dangle this 'sister' as a bait. Hadriana probably is here at his bidding, making sure that I will fall for this."

"If you have a sister, she could be the key to unlock your past."

"I am not going back to Minrathous." He shook his head, dislodging her hand, and gave her a look that question her senses.

"I did not say you should." She pursed her lips, staring at him with an amused smile. "Kirkwall is crawling with mercenaries, I'm sure we could hire one to find your sister for you."

"You have me there." He nodded slowly.

"How hard can it be to find someone willing to infiltrate a Magister's household?" She asked, drawing a chuckle from him. She sidled close, pulling him against her side. He shifted to accommodate her, having used to her invasion of his personal space a long time ago. "Don't worry, Fenris, we'll find your family no matter what."

"Thank you, Hawke." Fenris pulled in a ragged breath, tightening an arm around her waist.

"I understood. I've always understood." She smiled softly, running a hand up and down his back, feeling the tension slowly leaving him. Belatedly, she realized this closeness was probably why the others had mistook her involvement with Fenris, but she likes to provide comfort whenever and wherever she can. Fenris have not objected, and she does not intend to be censored by third parties. Especially by nosey third parties, she smiled fondly at the thought of gossiping Anders and Sebastian. She sighed in contentment, turning her head to kiss the side of Fenris' head. She sat with him for a long moment, before the quietness became too mellow for her, and she started to fidget.

"Well, that didn't take long." Fenris smirked, withdrawing his arm and stood up, taking the bottle with him. He took it to the shelves, pausing to stare at the bottle for a moment before putting it on the highest shelf.

"Not up for a drink tonight?" She raised her eyebrow, watching him from her seat. "That's rare for you."

"I've been thinking, too much it seems." He sighed, walking toward the window and stared out to the darkened streets of the city, crossing his arms. "Living life recklessly doesn't hold as much appeal anymore."

"And here I thought you weren't the settling down type." She laugh softly, standing up and went to the window to stand next to him. The chilly air caress her face, and she lean her head out, breathing in the fresh air laced with perfume of the night's mist. "I know you're waiting for Danarius, but have you ever thought of a change of space?"

"Perhaps." He grunted. "When it's all over."

"It's been a few years."

"I know his determination, he will not give up, as long as he live."

"This building will still be here, but your sanity might not." She nudge her elbow into his side. He grunt, but did not say anything. She let a moment pass before pushing the matter again. "You do need a break. You can't keep this up."

"Don't decide matters for me." He warned, moving away, but she held him back by his forearm.

"Then make up your mind." She said softly. "Or at least think of the alternatives."

"I've thought about it!" He snapped, jerking his arm back and turning his back on her, every word was spoken through clenched teeth. "In fact, I've thought of little else. I've fought tooth and nail for my freedom, but the threat of Danarius looms over my head every day. He have been hunting me like a prized dog. Every place I've been to was another dashed hope of being free, every person I met was a danger. Kirkwall is the first city that he did not trampled in his hunt for me. Three years, and still no sight of Danarius; I have wondered if he had given up. He was aware of my location, and I wondered why he have done nothing. I have assumed that I would be safe here, but it turned out to be a prison, Hadriana's presence here had shown me that. They can come and go as they wishes, with no one's the wiser. I cannot fathom why he have not return here to claim me, but I fear the reason he have not. I've question myself if this is just another plan of his, to ease me into complacency, and destroy all that I am once and for all. As much as I know about him, he also knew about me. He knew what I wanted, what I wished for. How do I trust in what I see any longer? How can I be sure of anything anymore?"

"Fenris…" Hawke sucked in a breath. She feared that he would break, and had tried hard to prevent that; so hard that she did not see that he had already fractured, barely holding together. What should I do? What can I do? Providing comfort was no longer enough, though Hawke did try. She hugged him, his frame stiff in her arms. "I am sorry."

"It's not your fault." He shook his head, letting out a tired breath. "I am at a lost. I'm not certain how to go forward, or even where this will lead to."

"Wherever it lead, I will have your back." She said, resting her chin at the crook of his neck. Which beg the question of how to give him peace? She can calm him down, and provide relief to his pain, but there is only so much she can do. The rest is up to him, and he does have the strength to pull through, even if he did not believe so.

"Thank you." He said gruffly. "Perhaps this is what it meant to be friends."

"I'm glad you think so." Hawke smiled, her breath tickling his neck.

xxx

It was past midnight when Hawke made her way out of Fenris' mansion; deciding it was too late to go to the Hanged Man, she veered toward the path to her estate, only to see paint giants standing guard in front of her house.

"Don't you people ever sleep?" She gaped.

"The Arishok requested your presence."

She raised her eyebrow at the choice of words. "You're asking me? What, no more demands?" The giants didn't answer her, and she sighed. "What is it this time?" She asked again, but at their stoic silence she threw up her hands, turning toward the path that leads to the compound. She was irritated the whole way there, her steps was almost a run, but the giants had no problem keeping up with her, which irks her even more. She tried to keep in mind that they were polite in summoning her, but she cannot be sure if it is a good thing or a bad thing. It is doubtful that they would be this courteous to someone they do not like, but it felt a little off to her, like they are treating her as a stranger.

"Just try and do that." She muttered under her breath.

The guard at the gate had noted the storm that is Hawke, and silently opened the gate before she reached it, and Hawke rushed in. The compound was quiet, but activities was still take place, with a few Qunari either patrolling, carrying crates back and forth, or doing some cleaning. She barely noted them, and her presence was ignored as she was once again being march toward the Arishok's tent.

Her 'escort' left her in front of the tent, and Hawke took a deep breath, trying to get a semblance of control over her temper; then she lifted the flap. Her first step in the tent surprised her, for he was no where in sight. Instead, the smell of faint cinnamon hit her nose, accompanied by the smell of roasted meat; her stomach chose that moment to let itself be heard, reminding her she have not eaten since the start of her trip to the Magister's nest.

A rustling sound turned her head to the side of the tent, where the Arishok walk out of a partitioned part of the tent.

"Hawke." He greeted, his voice ran over her skin, and she shivered.

Deciding to suppressed her reaction to his presence, she turned her attention to the big table in the room, eyes on the a full plate containing white buns, a tea pot and two tea cups. "Midnight snacks?" She asked.

"An offering." He said, walking toward the table and sat down in his usual seat, staring at her over the plate. "And you are hungry. Eat. If you wish." He added the last words after a pause.

She would have protested at the order to dine, even if she was hungry, but his additional words helped her overcome the initial objection, and she stride toward him, sitting cross-legged and pulling the plate and the single fork toward her, salivating at the delightful smell of the food. "Why?" She asked, picking up one of the white buns, studying it curiously before biting into it. Her eyes widen as she start chewing. The white covering of the bun was pure white, and she wasn't sure what it was at first, but it seems to be baked dough, fluffier and softer than any bread she've ever tasted. The meat filling was plenty and juicy, with so many flavors that she couldn't pin it all down. The meat was chewy, with hints of spices and herbs, bits of colorful vegetables and slight hint of pepper. The dough itself absorbed some of the flavor and the sauce, lending a lighter touch to the bun. She had meat buns before from various places she've been to, but none was as well-made as these, and she glanced up at him, chewing fast and swallowed so she could ask questions. "These-"

"Your enjoyment of them is obvious, but we will not share the recipes."

"I probably would come here more often." She laughs, stuffing the rest of the bun in her mouth and chew thoughtfully this time, trying to distinct the flavors.

"I have a talk with your dwarf friend." He said, still watching her. "He suggested food as a mean to mend differences."

"Varric told you to bribe me with food?" She asked, reaching for a tea cup. "Well, that's not a bad start. But why?"

"You reacted to a slight I did not meant."

"And this is your way of apologizing?" She blinked, before smirking. "That's sweet of you."

"Not an apology. An offer so we can reach an understanding."

He's trying, Hawke smiled wider. "Alright, what understanding are we supposed to talk about?"

"Hmmm." He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table and folded his hands, staring at her.

"What?" She asked, picking up another bun and bit into it.

"You are not as vexed as I have thought."

"I was angry." She shrugged. "But it's hard to be irritated over good food. And these are wonderful!"

A slight frown crease his brows, and he was quiet for a moment.

"What?" She asked again, drawing out the single word in an exasperated breath.

"I have read that human female are prone to sulking."

Hawke barked out a laugh, noticing his eyes narrowing in displeasure. Of course, he would research on humans to better deal with her; it was understandable where he was coming from, but she could have save him a lot of time. "You are adorable, you know that?" She took a drink from her cup, still smiling. "I am still annoyed, but I have a feeling we can work things out."

"Reasonable assumption."

He still watches as she finished the meal. When she pushed the plate aside, her mood was mellower; she yawned, feeling the day's event had finally caught up to her.

"We found the Magister's hiding place." She said, leaning against the table and mirrored his seating pose. "They were up to something. Unfortunately, we did not get the right information. They should find out about the missing Magister by now, and might be on the move sooner than expected."

"My scout confirmed that they are still there. A few elf had been snatched from the Alienage, fortunately, their captors was dispatched of."

"But that would mean they wanted sacrifices." Hawked curled her lips, the thought disgusted her. "They need to be dealt with as soon as possible. I shall contact the Templars."

"The Arvaarad will be notified, and they will lend aid."

"Are you sure?" Hawke raised an eyebrow. "I thought you didn't want to be involved with matters not beneficial to the Qun."

"Ungoverned Saarebas threaten all." Was all the explanation he gave, but Hawke could understood his concern.

"Right." She nodded, standing up. "I'll go see if Cullen is still awake."

"Hawke." He called, and she glance down at him, noticing the tightening of his jaws. "We have not discuss your refusal."

"Ah, yes." She scratch the back of her head, biting her lower lip. He noticed her hesitation, but said nothing; instead, he leaned back into the cushion, waiting for her answer. "I won't say the idea of being fed well is not a temptation itself. However, I value my privacy; reporting about every move I make will grate on me. You probably knows everything that needed to be know anyway; as much as I disliked being followed and be watched, I'll try not to notice one of your giants hiding in a bush."

"And you will appraise me of necessary information of your own volition?"

"I have," She frown. "And I will continue to do so."

He nodded. The silence that follows signaled that he was done, and Hawke sighed, she still need an additional request. "This..invitation, would it be acceptable for me to bring a guest?"

"Clarify." He barked, his voice held a note of displeasure. He had went so far as to give her a peace offering, and held back on the previous requirement to know of her every move. Asking more seems greedy, but Hawke figured that the Qun would benefit from someone with Fenris' talents.

"My friend Fenris, the one that some knowledge of the Qun? Would he be of use here?"

"He wishes to join the Qun?"

"No, ah," She grimaced. "It...would bring him peace. Or at least I hope it would. In exchange, he have great experience in battle, and have a unique skillset that would benefit both your warriors and your scouts. I'm sure he would be useful." She wondered how the Qunari would react once they know the extent of Fenris' power, or how they would even understand such a thing. Likely they would distrust mages more, she sighed, the beginning of doubt rearing its ugly head. However, the Qunari does not hated the mages as Fenris does, and hopefully they can show him a way to let go of his past. That's all she can hope for right now. One step a a time, she reminded herself.

"And you trust this elf?"

"Yes." Her answer was short, but it held her confidence.

"Very well." He stood up. "Make preparations."

xxx

After Hawke left, the Arishok found himself reading the same page of one of his books several times. Seeing that he will not be able to continue, he returned the book to its place on the shelf, and took his place at the table, reflecting the day's events. The city has not improve, despite Hawke's hard attempt at fixing what she can. She had fought groups after groups of bandits, yet they returned every night. She took on tasks after tasks for the noble and the people of the city, only to have more demands placed on her. Everything she did to keep the city safe seems to met with countermovements riling the city. He did not understood why she keep engaging in a cause that long since lost. He had found her talents to be wasted on the city, and had wanted to cultivate her, taking her from the slime of this place before she is lost. However, he was confused as to why his interest in her is growing. He had tested her strength, discuss strategies with her, and he challenged her thinking and found her thoughts process sound; in short, he want her to grow more.

Is this parental affection? He wondered. He have a certain fondness for his men, and wanted the same thing for them; but he have to admit to himself that he allows her more conveniences than he ever have, and he ponders if this is wise. He paid everyone under his command the same amount of attention, yet he make a little extra time for her, granting her equal standing by letting her speak her mind and her protests. He was not used to having his words question, yet he readily take into account of her reasons - though sometimes he was baffled at how and why she arrived at certain conclusions, and sometimes not understanding her completely. Her actions contradicts what he know about how non-Qunari act. He could see through a person, knowing their intentions with the first glance, but Hawke…..She is a puzzle that have no definite shape, but grows more interesting the more the pieces is assembled.

He had learn that children of non-Qunari are raised by their parents, and he wonder if this is what those parents feel for their children - an interest to learn more about their preferences, seeing how they interact with others, proud when they make the right choice, generally stumped when they make unexpected choices, and the urge to keep them insight most of the time.

Perhaps so.

He does have several children of his own, yet he had not inquire after them and watch them grow up as it is not the way of his people, so his consideration for this human female require further contemplation.

He drank his tea, feeling amused that he should feel fatherly toward a human; but her character is worthy of his attention. Raising a child can be a difficult process, and he certainly have more esteem for the Tamassran. He will inquire more into what they think of the children in their care when he return to Par Vollen.