Chapter 7
I didn't want to wake up, I didn't want to open my eyes for fear of seeing Dean and knowing he had possibly done something to Bal. I felt fingers caress my face, and a familiar voice murmuring my name. I was almost crying when I opened my eyes and wrapped my arms around Balthazar, pulling him into a much needed kiss. He slid onto the bed and wrapped his arms around me, we kissed as if it had been years, not hours since the living room. We finally came up for a breath, and I looked into his beautiful eyes. He smiled down at me and said, "Let me guess… 'Clothes off'?" I huffed. "Shut up and kiss me."
We spent the rest of the day wrapped up in each other, not even pretending to care about leaving the bed. I really wasn't sure if I wanted to know what happened after getting shot, but I had to ask. "Bal?" "Hmm?" he murmured as he looked down at me. "What happened? I mean after?" He closed his eyes and pressed his face in my hair, taking a deep breath. "After… I healed you, and sent those hairless apes back from whence they came. I didn't kill them if that's what you were asking." He took a deep breath. "I don't want to be the reason you stop doing what's important to you. And much as I detest the thought of you spending your time around those Winchesters, Castiel asked if and when you were coming back to help them."
I thought about it for a minute. On the one hand, part of me wanted nothing more than to just be here, curled up in his arms. But I also enjoyed the hunt, feeling like I was making a difference in the world. I pressed my face in his chest and sighed. His fingers traced patterns in my back and he kissed the top of my head. "You know love, I want nothing more than for you to be happy, and whatever you decide, I'll be by your side." I looked up into his bright blue eyes and smiled. "Promise?" He tightened his arms around me. "I swear it."
~o~
I waited in the hotel room, trying not to pace. I heard footsteps outside and the door swung open. Dean's face was expressionless, and Sammy looked everywhere but at me. I sighed. "Sammy, I'm ok, and it's good to see you both." I grabbed beers out of the fridge and passed them over. We sat and talked about a possible case Sammy had come across, a few kids that had gone missing from a local preschool. They said we'd be leaving first thing in the morning, and for me to be ready. After they left I was about to text Bal when Cas appeared.
I stuck my phone in my back pocket and waited. He sat on the edge of the bed and stared at me, I wondered if he was staring into my soul at times. "I am glad you decided to stay, and I understand if you find it difficult to be around Sam." I put up my hand. "Cas, it's over and done with. I just want to move forward and to feel like I am making a difference again." He stood and tilted his head slightly. "And that's all you want?"
I smirked. "Balthazar and I are together, and it's going to stay that way. What can I say, I kind of love the guy, and he loves me too. And don't worry I have my head on straight, I know what I am doing." He didn't look entirely convinced, but nodded. "Get some rest, I will see you in the morning." I smiled and nodded. "Goodnight Cas."
I slept better that night than I had in quite some time, it may have had something to do with the face that I wasn't alone, but I also felt more at peace. I was actually looking forward to the back seat of the Impala, to Dean's crappy music, and to once again feel like I had a real purpose.