"Come one idiot. Pick up already," I mumble impatiently into the ringing phone and pull the massive towel further onto my bare shoulders. Shivering unconsciously, I cast a glare towards the door, in the Tomato Bastard's general direction. He'd taken my clothes, insisting that he dry them, leaving me with only my boxers and a towel. He'd tried taking the boxers too but I convinced him otherwise using my foot. I got tired of waiting for him to bring me something of his to throw on and figured he was probably too stupid to think of lending my something, rather than have me stand half naked in his living room.
When the answering machine picks up again, I mentally pull my brother's hair out and dial his number for the fourth fucking time. It doesn't even get a chance to ring before his panicky whining bombards my ear drums. By the end of today, I think I'll have to send them to the emergency room by Life Star.
"Ah~ Lovino, Lovino! Something horrible has happened I don't know what's going on why do I look like you I'm scared and Ludwig was being mean to me wah~ help me Lovi I-"
"How the hell did he know it was me..?" I irritatedly pinch the bridge of my nose, trying very hard not to start a nuclear war with my temper. "Feli, I-"
"I'm so confused its weird where are you Lovi-"
"Feli."
"What if we're stuck like this forever I want my cute face back fratello give it back how did this happen-"
"Feli, stop."
"You weren't there when I woke up so I called Ludwig and he-"
"Shut the fucking hell up right now you little Potato-loving, pasta-eating bastard before I come over there and strangle the annoying out of you!" I shout and grip the phone, my knuckles turning white and my jaw clenched in anger. He cries quietly from fear and hiccups over the phone, but says nothing. My anger is replaced by guilt so I awkwardly apologize and through gritted teeth tell him to help me figure out what's going on. He launches into an agonizing story about how the Potato Asshole was somehow being 'mean' to him. That's when I get the idea. "Hey idiota," A slight smile appears on my face as I think over my plan. "I'll talk to Ludwig for you, okay?" I struggle to hold back another one of those moronic 'vehs'.
He perks up and I can tell by the sound of his voice that he's smiling, "R-really fratello? Grazie~!"
"Yeah, yeah whatever. Don't mention it." I sigh and we say our goodbyes, both of us grinning but for completely different reasons when we hang up.