Mommy Dearest
by Mallory Quinn
Chapter 14
"Therapy begins…"
One magic night I was conceived
I was warm and fuzzy
I had you on call at the end of this rope
You were feeding me talking to me
Until all of a sudden I was cold
You were gone…
Why did you leave me?
I need you so much
I'm not strong enough…
But I have to be
This new life is hard and cruel
But I'm strong, I'm trying not to cry
But I'm only a little girl
Where are you? I need you so much…
I'm feeling warm and fuzzy again
You're here for me, finally
I feel so good, I don't ever want to leave you again
My mommy dearest, got me back!!!
Candy and Lynda were still in each other's arms, calming down. Steven approached them, Candy left her mother's arms and went into her father's still crying. After a while Steven said:
- You want to come with us and talk a little, baby?
- Yes, said Candy, let's go.
She looked around…
- Terry? She said
- I'm here Freckles, let's go…, he said approaching her
- Wait…, said Candy
She walked to see Mrs. Wallace.
- I'm so sorry for all this, Trudy, she said
- Don't be ridiculous! That was very entertaining! Said Trudy smiling
She hugged Candy.
- Now I know what you've been going through, she whispered in her ear…hang in there. Lynda is a great woman…
- So I've heard, said Candy, Thanks Trudy…Jade, I have to go
- Go honey, said Jade hugging her too, that was your big secret? You're really a Rothschild??? You're so full of surprises!
- I'm sorry for keeping this from you…
- With my gossipy mouth? You were right to do so! Said Jade laughing, good luck
- Thanks Jade, good bye
She looked at her friends who smiled at her. She walked to Terry, took his arms and left with her parents. Terry drove her to her parents' house, while Lynda and Steven were in their car with the driver. Lynda was on cloud nine, crying of joy in her husband's arms.
- We finally held our baby in ours arms, Steven, the sensation was priceless
- I know… and you turned into the dragon lady defending her…
- Sarah Reagan can go to hell for all I care. She made my baby cry, countless times! The Rothschild grandchild!!!!
- Your parents…
- Will probably hear about this, come what may! I held my baby girl and I'm the happiest woman in the world tonight!
They burst out laughing! They arrived at the villa and they went to the living room, where Candy and Terry were waiting for them. Candy approached her mother and hugged her again. They went to sit on the couch.
- I don't know where to start, said Lynda
- I do, said Candy…Albert gave me the name of one of his friends, a psychiatrist…I've been postponing making the appointment… I'm finally going to make one to see him, I think I'm ready…would you come with me?
- Of course, baby I will…, said Lynda
- I hope it's ok…we need professional help to fix this. I'm still boiling with rage, but I can now look at you and hug you, I missed you so much!
Candy hugged her mother again, it felt so good to be in her arms, she missed that more than she was willing to admit…She was crying again.
- Thank you so much for defending me. I've had people defending me…but coming from you it was something else, it felt right, it felt so good, said Candy crying
- It was long overdue…I thought about you every single day… I wrote you letters, said Lynda
- You did?
- Yes…
- Can I have them?
- Of course, said Lynda, wait here, I'll go get them…
Lynda stood up and she got out of the room.
- Are you ok, Freckles? Asked Terry
- Yes, said Candy, I'm fine…
Lynda came back with a box full of letters she wrote to her daughter, and gave it to Candy. Candy took the box.
- Thank you…mom, I'm going to go and read this
- Of course…
- Candy, said Steven, we want you, when you're ready to come and live here with us…
- I'll think about it, said Candy
She hugged her mother, and her father and she left with Terry. They arrived at her apartment. Annie had gone back to the villa with Archie. So they were alone, with the help.
- Terry, she said, can you stay with me tonight? I can't be alone,…
- Of course Candy, I'll stay with you for as long as you need me… I'm calling my understudy to tell him to replace me tomorrow night
- You're not going to get into trouble?
- I'm the King of Broadway as you mentioned numerous time, he said smiling
- Isn't it late for you to call him?
- Well I just want him to know to get ready for tomorrow night…and I'll tell Robert too…
Terry went to make his phone calls. Candy took her shoes off and she took the box, opened it and she started reading the letters… She cried reading the first one. Terry arrived and took her in his arms. And she started reading the letters out loud so he could hear too.
- Freckles, you don't have to do this tonight…
- Yes, I do…
- You keep crying…
- I can't help it, it's tears of joy, rage, anger, all together… I feel so much better with you here Terry, she said hugging him
- I'm glad I can help…
She read the letters all night long and they felt asleep holding each other on the couch.
Lynda was the happiest camper ever. She and her husband talked all night, laughed all night and had fun all night. Candy was coming around…Even the thought of confronting her parents didn't scare her at all. It was going to be stormy, but she was going to have her daughter back…
The next morning, Candy woke up in Terry's arms. She woke up, went to her bedroom, took her evening gown off and she went to take a shower. She got ready and she went back to the living room to see Terry who was still asleep.
Dusty had arrived and she was surprised to see Terrence Grandchester asleep on her boss' couch.
- Dusty, said Candy, hi… can you make me that appointment with Doctor Blanton?
- Good morning Candy, said Dusty, sure I'll do it right away…
- Tell him Albert Andrew recommended him, maybe he'll see us faster
- All right
- And cancel all my appointments today. I'm taking the day off…
- Very well…
She went to the living room to see Terry. She just sat there and looked at him. He felt observed and he opened his eyes and smiled…
- This is the most beautiful image I've ever woken up to, he said
- Good morning, sleepy head! Said Candy smiling
- Good morning Freckles…
- You can use one of the guest room to get ready, she said
- Thank you…
- Thank you for staying with me. I really needed someone and you were there…Thank you Terry
- You're very welcome Freckles. You're welcome, anytime…
He went to get ready and she went to her office to see Dusty, who had just hang up the phone.
- So Dusty, did you get an appointment?
- Well his schedule was full, but went I mentioned Albert's name, he said he can find a spot for you this afternoon after lunch…
- It's great to have that kind of power, isn't it? Said Candy smiling
Candy wanted to call her mother, but she didn't have the number. Terry should have it…
She went to the dinning room, where the maid was setting the table for breakfast. Terry arrived; all freshen up with his clothes from the night before…
- Well I can see you don't entertain any men in your apartment… There's not even a razor…
- I sent the driver to buy you some stuff, said Candy he ran a little late…
She gave him a package with the necessary for men's grooming and some clothes!
- You're the best, Freckles, he said smiling and walking away
- Terry wait, do you have my mother's telephone number?
- Yes, he said
- I wanted to call her…
- All right, here it is…
He gave her the number and went back to his grooming…. Candy went to her bedroom to make the phone call to her mother. When she got her at the end of the line, she felt so good hearing her voice.
- Hello? Said Lynda
- Mom…? Said Candy
- Candy, baby… how are you this morning?
- I'm fine, what about you? Any morning sickness?
- Yes… otherwise I feel bad all day…did you want something?
- I made an appointment with a psychiatrist for this afternoon. Will you be available to come with me?
- Of course, honey, what time?
- After lunch…
- All right…
- You want to come and have lunch with me, so we could go together afterwards?
- Yes, said Lynda smiling I'll be there right before lunch. Are you going to be at the shelter?
- No, I'm taking the day off…
- Is Terry with you?
- Yes…he spent the night… on the couch with me all dressed up…
She wanted to reassure her mother.
- Oh… I'll see you later then, say hi to Terry for me
- Say hi to dad for me…here's my address…
She gave her address to her mother. Then she hung up the phone and went to the dinning room to find Terry getting ready to eat breakfast.
- Thanks for everything Freckles, did you call Lynda?
- Yes, I'm going to have lunch with her then we're going to go see the psychiatrist…
- Good…how are you feeling?
- Weird…but I want to do this. I want to be in my mother's arms all the time… it's like since I didn't get it as a baby and a child, I miss it… It feels so good to be in her arms… I never thought I would feel so good in her arms…
- I know Freckles, being a boy, I didn't want to admit I needed my mother, but when she hugged me, it was like everything in the world was fine…
- I'm glad I've got you with me, you've experience it…you understand me…
They were eating bacon and eggs, coffee, toast, tomato salad, orange juice.
- You're not going to the shelter?
- I'm taking the day off, for my therapy and you took the day off, I wanted to be with you…
- I would've come with you to the shelter
- I don't want to hear about other people's problems today… Today, I'm starting to take care of my problems…
Terry smiled. They had finished breakfast and they were walking to the living room.
- One of my problems, she said was… wanting to kiss you so much when I came for the premiere…
- But I was preoccupied with the Susanna matter and I didn't want to get too close to you…
- I knew something was up… but now, we've got the whole morning to ourselves… you want to make up for that?
- Your wish is my command, Miss Andrew, said Terry smiling
Candy smiled. She was a little nervous about going to see Dr. Blanton with her mother. She needed something to boost her confidence. Everything with Terry by her side felt right, felt easier, even if she will have to talk about what happened between them eventually, for the moment, he was there, he was a dream come true and she was going to take full advantage of that. She's not going to take him for granted, the Susanna matter showed her that nothing in life was guaranteed… everything could change in a split of a second.
They sat on the couch, he took her in his arms and he started to kiss her, softly and briefly at first, then, a little longer, and longer and longer… they played with their tongues for a while, without getting tired of each other…
- Are you tired yet? He said
- Of what? Of your tongue? No, bring it on Romeo!
They burst out laughing. He kissed her nose, counting the freckles making fun of them, kissing them.
- I thought you didn't like my freckles…
- But I do love them, they're adorable…and I love your nose…
- So I should take everything you told me on our first meeting as the opposite of what was really coming out of your mouth?
- Pretty much, he said smiling, I fell in love with you from the second I laid my eyes on you…
- I have to confess, I came out and I saw you and I thought you were Anthony back from the dead…
- You told me that at the zoo in London
- And you were very rude I compared you to him…
- I was a foolish boy, jealous…
- Of a dead boy…you were there with me…you didn't need to be jealous. I was just sharing my thoughts with you, because we were getting closer, I wanted you to know everything about me…I didn't expect you to get that angry…
- You were comparing me to your old boyfriend…then at the May Festival…
- Let's not talk about that now, ok, Romeo? She said, it's been more than three minutes since you last kissed me…
- That long? He said, let me take care of that…
He kissed her again…They continued for hours and that's how Lynda found them, making out!
- Hum hum, she said
The lovebirds stopped and looked at her.
- I hope I'm not interrupting, I'm sorry, I'm a little early…, said Lynda
- Hi Lynda, said Terry smiling
- Hi Terrence, said Lynda, Candy…
- Mom…, said Candy
Candy let go of Terry and she walked to her mother to hug her.
- Thank you for coming, said Candy
- Are you ok? Said Lynda
- With Terry here, I'm fine…, said Candy
- We both took the day off for some TLC…, said Terry
- "TLC"? Said Candy
- "Tender Loving Care"…
- Oh…, said Candy smiling, mom I'm glad you came early, we can tell Cook what you're craving and she's going make it for you…
- Oh Candy, I don't want to bother anybody…
- You, Lynda de Rothschild? You're kidding right? Said Candy
Lynda smiled looking at her baby girl.
- Come on mom…, said Candy, have a seat and tell me what you really want…
- Well, I'm craving shredded carrots with mayonnaise, roasted chicken with lemon and fries…, said Lynda sitting down
- I'll go tell Cook…, said Candy smiling
Candy left the room to go to the kitchen and make sure everything her mom ask for be ready for lunch. Lynda stayed with Terry.
- Thank you Terrence, said Lynda
- For what?
- I know you're a big part in her opening up to me…
- You defending her to those horrible Reagan might have something to do with it too… Good job by the way…
- I wish I could strangle that woman for making my baby cry…
- They're going to be in the streets, said Terry, because I don't think they're going to apologise to Candy in a million years…
- I'm usually not one for revenge, but when I read that report, I couldn't stop crying thinking how much she must have cried helpless and powerless… and moving her room to the stables… the Rothschild granddaughter, sleeping in the stables with horses!!!!
- She actually had it better at the Pony Home, she was happy there…
- With two loving mothers… I'm glad she had them, they taught her well. She's an amazing young woman…I'm sure that's what go her through the house from hell…
- Are you two talking about me? Said Candy coming in
- Who else? Said Terry smiling
- Lunch will be ready in a few moments, everything you wanted will be ready…
A maid came in with a glass of lemonade for Lynda.
- How did you know? Said Lynda
- The night I came for the job interview, you were drinking lemonade…, said Candy
- You remembered?
- Yes…, said Candy sitting next to Terry
Lynda looked at her and she smiled. They continued talking. Then lunch was ready. They all went to the dinning room and they had lunch. Lynda was very happy with her food.
Then came the time to go to the appointment. Terry went with them; he wanted to be there for Candy and her mother. The ladies were glad he was there. Everybody was a little nervous. They arrived at Smiley Blanton's office and they were immediately asked to get into his office.
- Good luck Freckles, said Terrence kissing her on the forehead
- Thanks Terry, said Candy, let's go mom
She went with her mother to doctor's office. Dr. Blanton, smiled when he saw them.
- Hello, he said Miss Andrew, Mrs. Lloyd, have a seat
- Hello doctor, said Candy, thank you
- Hi, said Lynda, thank you
- All right, what can I do for you? Asked the doctor
- Well I recently found out who my mother was, said Candy
- Mrs. Lloyd is your mother? I can see the resemblance, said the doctor
- And usually I'm this happy camper, but I've been boiling with rage inside, said Candy
- Yet, you came together…
- I want to know why I'm so angry at her, said Candy, all she wants is to make up for everything, but I just didn't want to hear it…
- All right, said the doctor, let's start from the beginning…Mrs. Lloyd, why don't you start with your story; how did you get pregnant and why you abandoned your baby…?
- Very well…
Lynda told her story and Candy was hearing it in details for the first time. Pride… because Steven didn't remember being with her, she decided to keep everything to herself …
- It must've been a burden to carry all by yourself, said the doctor
- It was, said Lynda, I was very afraid of my parents...
- Do you regret abandoning your daughter?
- Yes, I do… I should've confronted my parents…
- But you didn't do anything until recently…
- Recently, things changed for me… my father arranged for a marriage between me and my baby's father…and I thought it was a sign for me to look for her and fix what I did wrong and be one happy family at last….I missed my baby so much…so I told my husband the truth and he was eager to be a family with our long lost daughter…
- So you found your daughter told her the truth and then what happened?
- She was very angry with me for abandoning her…which is normal. I don't resent her for that…
- Miss Andrew…, said the doctor, can you tell us about your life?
- All right…, said Candy
She started to tell them about the Pony Home, how happy she was with Annie by her side, how she tied up the ducklings to their mother so they won't lose her, how they didn't want to be adopted, how they kissed each other on the cheeks pretending it was from their parents, how Tom got adopted, she felt betrayed… until they met Mr. Brighton…
- You decided with Annie never to be adopted…, said the doctor
- Yes…I thought she was like me… but she was obviously thinking otherwise
- You felt betrayed…
- The Brightons came to adopt me, I didn't want to leave Annie and the Pony Home so I pretended I peed in my bed by taking the sheet of my little brother John … all I did was make Annie looked better and she agreed to be adopted, when Mrs. Brighton asked her…
- You must've felt betrayed…
- We had an agreement! Said Candy angry, I did all that so I won't get adopted, and she turns around and betrays me!!!
- You felt abandoned again…the first abandonment, you were a baby, then Tom, your saviour left…then Annie left…
- I did felt abandoned by everybody I loved…, said Candy sadly, why did they want a family? We were a family!!! We were altogether, abandoned, orphans, were happy, why would they want to ruin it? I didn't get it…
- You said you didn't want to be adopted, you didn't want a family…
- I didn't…
- But you tying up those ducklings to their mother…why did you do it?
- Well since I didn't have a mother, I didn't want them to lose their mother like me…
- You cared about family…
Candy remained silent for a while; she did care
- Yes…, I didn't want the ducklings to be like me without a mother…, she said with tears in her eyes
Lynda was crying, her baby girl had to deal with so much, so young… Candy continued, she got the letter from Annie which made her very happy until, she couldn't get them anymore, because Annie's mother wanted to sever all ties with the Pony Home.
- How did you take the news? Asked the doctor
- I was very upset…I didn't understand why they wanted to hide the fact that Annie came from the Pony Home, since it was the truth…I thought parents were suppose to make things better, not worse…
- You felt abandoned, one more time…
- Yes… then I had a vision of some kind…
She told them about the prince of the hills, how he made her feel better, how he disappeared and she found the badge with an "A" on it…It was the first positive thing ever since her friends had left to be adopted.
- My Prince, said Candy smiling…he gave me hope…
- Well I'll say that's enough for one session, said the doctor, since you're Albert's adoptive daughter, I can see you every day… would you be available tomorrow morning?
- Yes, said Candy, mom?
- I will be, said Lynda
- Perfect, said the doctor. I will see you tomorrow morning at 10 o'clock…
- Goodbye doctor, said Candy
- Goodbye doctor, and thank you, said Lynda
Candy and her mother left the medical cabinet and they found Terry entertaining other patients in the waiting room…
- Terry? Said Candy, ready?
- Terry? Said the lady, as in Terrence Grandchester? It is you! Why did you pretend you just looked like him…?
- My girlfriend likes to pretend I'm him, said Terry smiling, I don't have the talent of the King of Broadway
- Come on, my King of Broadway, let's get out of here! Said Candy laughing
- Bye ladies, said Terry smiling
They left the doctor's office, after Candy confirmed her appointment for the next morning.
- How was it? Said Terry
- Well it was intense, painful, but a relief also, said Candy
- Yes…I'm so glad we're doing this, baby, said Lynda
- Me too, mom, said Candy
Lynda went back home to rest, not before calling her husband at the office to tell her about the therapy session.
Candy and Terry went for a walk at the park, relaxing, looking at children play.
- What was that, in the waiting room? Asked Candy
- I pretended I looked like me…
- Running away from your celebrity?
- Sometimes it's really annoying…
- Maybe you shouldn't be so good on stage…
- That's something I won't compromise… when I went away, I worked in a third rate theatre, where the manager didn't even care whether I was sober or not…
Candy remained silent; and drunk he was! That was a painful scene, which hurt her deep down inside…
- Look at that little boy, she said to change the subject, isn't he cute?
Terry realised that Candy didn't really like to talk about the theatre, she would change the subject of the conversation all the time, and she still hasn't seen his play either…but he didn't want to call her on it. Later…
- Yes, he is, he said smiling
They went back home to rest together, reading together and making comments on the book, laughing.
At dinner time, Candy's friends came to be with her and they all had a marvellous time commenting about the events of the night before.
- Candy, said Archie, aren't you full of surprises! You're a Rothschild?
- Yes, Archie…
- And you've got the Reagan at the palm of your hand… what are you going to do?
- I don't know yet, I've got my own problems….the Reagans can wait…
- Candy, said Patty, I thought we were friends…
- I'm sorry Patty that wasn't a happy subject for me…
- You found your mother, you should be happy…
- Well I wasn't… I'm angry…
- So what we witnessed last night…?
- Was the first hug I ever gave my mother…
- Oh... I thought it was kind of intense, said Patty
Michael took Candy aside to tell her about the shelter and the night before.
- That was some show last night…, said Michael
- Wasn't it? Said Candy
- Lynda de Rothschild? I thought she reminded me of you
- Now you know why…
- Are you ok?
- I'm in therapy…
- That's good, said Michael, anybody I know?
- Smiley Blanton…
- I heard about him, he's very good in speech therapy too…
- That's good to know…, said Candy sadly
- It's going to be fine, Candy you'll see. Being a doctor, I'm a very bad patient, I won't admit I'm not well until the last minute…it's ok to need therapy, you know…
- It took me a while to admit I needed it…until she defended me in front of all those people…
The evening continued fine. Candy's friends left and Terry spent the night in the guest room…after spending half of the night on the living room couch with his beloved.
Candy and history
Smiley Blanton 1882-1966
Smiley Blanton was among the earliest in America to work in the field of speech pathology. He combined his medical and psychoanalytic training to create counseling and family therapies children and adults who stutter and who have voice and articulation problems