The next morning Harry sat at the crowded breakfast table with the rest of the household. He kept his head low and focused on the toast he was munching on to avoid awkward looks from Hermione. He had no idea why he'd done it. He had no interest in Hermione at all besides a friend, but he had been startled and tired and not in his mind when she'd woken him and before he knew it the damage was done. In fact for a while he had been convinced it had been a dream. Ron hadn't come down yet from his room. Harry chanced a peak up and saw that Hermione was focusing extra hard on her oatmeal as well. He secretly, in the back of his mind hoped that he hadn't been a disappointment to Hermione, she was very experienced in these matters and although Harry didn't want to admit it he was not.

When Ron finally came down Hermione offered him to take a seat. But his reply was less than humble, "Fuck off man, I've gotta take a shit," and stormed away.

"Well that certainly was uncalled for," stated Mrs. Weasley as she flicked her wand and magically a pile of toast began to butter itself, "But never mind that now, I have an announcement to make!" She cleared her throat and smiled at the family. "As I'm sure you all know we've been long-time friends with the Norris's and this coming Friday I've invited them to our house to hold the wedding of Filch and the late Mrs. Norris."

At this the entire family's mouths dropped open exposing half eaten breakfast egg slime.

"You mean the Ministry is actually allowing that man to marry a feline!?" Mr. Weasley gaped.

"Yes Arthur," Mrs. Weasley retorted, "Although I'm sure it's none of your business as to how Filch spends his alone time."

"Well if you count the cat he's not exactly alone is he?" Muttered Fred just low enough so Mrs. Weasley couldn't hear.

"You're quite right Fred," chimed in George, "I heard he's been giving it to that poor animal since before we were born!"

Ginny looked up startled, "But how can the cat be that old?"

"Quite simply actually, and shut up and eat your Wizard Puffs, you're making me feel like an old man!" said Fred.

Christmas came and went. Harry received a sweater with a picture of a golden snitch on it, loads of chocolate frogs and every flavour beans, some new frilly underpants (accompanied by strange lingering odors) curtsey of Cho and Neville, three worn out issues of Naked Witch Weekly from Fred and George, a piece of used dental floss from Ron, a new yo-yo from Hermione, and what appeared to be crusted blood on a used tissue from the Dursleys. The card read:

Dear Hairy,

We don't miss you and have enclosed a kerchief featuring your Aunt Petunia's menstrual blood to remind you how much we hate you and wish you'd choke on your own piss.

-The Durselys

Soon the day of the wedding arrived. Every one of the Weasleys was either busy cooking, cleaning, or helping to transform the backyard garden into a beautiful winter wonderland. Once all the guests had arrived and all the Norris' had been supplied with a fresh saucer of warm milk the celebration began. When Harry walked outside to find his seat he noticed that the yard looked a lot like it had when Bill and Fleur were married. The only difference was now gigantic pine trees laced with tinsel and gleaming ornaments stood as a backdrop to the front where the ceremony would take place and there was fresh white snow everywhere. Somehow the area wasn't cold though and he noticed hundreds of little golden lamps on tables and suspended in mid air that seemed to be giving off an unbelievable amount of heat for something so small.

Once everyone had found their seat (which was quite difficult for the cats didn't want to stay put) the Hogwarts janitor Filch stood before them with the Minister. His greasy hair had been combed back and he was wearing a rather respectable suit and tie ensemble. Then the orchestra began to play and Mrs. Norris came tottering down the isle towards her husband-to-be. Since she was a cat she did not have a dress but a long veil had been placed on her head that had doves holding it up so as it not to trail on the ground behind her. She held her head up proud to show the frilly white collar she wore with little bells that jingled a pleasant melody. Behind her walked Ginny who had been appointed flower girl and she tossed white rose petals. Harry thought to himself that Ginny was the sorriest looking flower girl he'd ever seen. She had huge bags under her eyes and was probably a bit hung over. Fortunately he'd seen her earlier that mourning down half her prescription bottle with fire whiskey and now she seemed to be flying! Once Mrs. Norris made it to the front of the ceremony (which had taken quite a few mouse toys and chasing balls of string in the said direction) the Minister began to speak as the couple gazed lovingly at each other. It was hard to hear what the Minister was saying over all the cats meowing but when it came time for the 'I Dos' even the cats seemed to know to hush.

Filch cleared his throat and began, "Dear sweet Mrs. Norris. I know it's been hard for you ever since Mr. Norris passed away. But I have been and will continue to take care of you until our dying day. I love you and I know I always will. Nothing could break us. No young lady or smooth talking alley cat could ever tear us apart. That's a promise I'm willing to keep. So will you, Mrs. Norris, accept my hand in marriage?"

Mrs. Norris looked up at Filch with tears in her eyes and simply replied, "Meow."

Then the whole crowd burst into applause and cat-calls as Filch leaned down and kissed his bride.

After that speech everything seemed to have become clear to Harry. He wasn't interested in random little affairs and playing with girls (or boys) hearts anymore. He wanted a true, solid relationship, and he knew who he wanted it with.

Later Ron and Harry were sitting at a round white table, facing opposite directions and wearing matching scowls when Hermione sat down across from them. She put both her hands on the table and folded them in a way that showed she meant business. "Look, I'm really sorry, to both of you. I've just been going through a confusing time in my life right now and I don't know what came over me. Harry," he turned to face her, "I know I must have given you the wrong impression the other day and for that I'm truly sorry. I didn't know what I was doing. Because my love lies with Ron." at this Ron also looks to her. She reaches out and takes his hand and they silently exchange words through their eyes. "Am I forgiven?" she asked Ron cautiously.

He smiles and says to her, "Want to dance?"

Harry stays seated for a while after, watching the couples waltz across the floor, trying not to trip over the mischievous little cats that dart between their legs.

"I've been waiting to get you alone." A deep voice behind him makes him jump in surprise. He turns to see none other than Thomas Riddle leaning with one arm on Harry's chair.

"Tom if anyone sees you…" Harry begins but Thomas sits down at the table anyways and holds up a finger to Harry's lips to silence him.

"Harry," he smiles, "Just because I happen to be the offspring of the most feared wizard ever to live does not mean I'm some escaped convict the government's after. I am allowed to go where I want, just as every other citizen is. Apart from Hogwarts that is, I am not allowed to step foot in the castle and if I was ever caught the consequences would be severe. You see, Dumbledore may be a trusting man but he's not about to make the same mistake twice."

"The Slytherins just worship you, don't they?" Harry moaned. "If you really ever needed to get in you could just get them to sneak you in, I'm sure they'd be capable of it."

Tom laughed, "Yes, being the descendant of such a dark wizard has its strengths. For one thing, they're always trying to jump into bed with me. I guess you figured it was me who broke up the fight at Hogwarts then?"

Harry nodded, "Yeah, I saw you walking away. You could've stayed to talk a while you know, once all the Slytherins had cleared out."

"Actually," he apologized, "I couldn't. That old hag Sprout spotted me and ran straight off to tell Dumbledore the moment I entered grounds. My time was very limited."

Harry didn't say anything so Thomas continued, "You know Harry, I've missed you. You had no idea how badly I wanted to see you these past weeks, but every time I even approach the castle Dumbledore sends out a patronus to meet me and warn me not to precede any closer. He's really tightened down security since I was spotted." He looked at Harry, his eyes full of hope.

Harry gave a small smile, "'Kay you're forgiven I guess. I've missed you too Tom. It's been awful around lately. And you know I've been thinking, once I get out of Hogwarts and all maybe we could find a place together, you know, to live as brothers for once." He made sure to add in the "brothers" part, so as not to give out any wrong ideas.

However Thomas looked absolutely overjoyed, "You know, I'd really like that Harry."

Tom took Harry's hand in his and Harry was surprised to find how warm and enjoyable it was.