Chapter 7
Arashi Narration
I don't know why the fuck do I always resort to doing that gay shite with him! UGH! Why don't I know what I want? I know I don't want to be with that queer but something compels me to him.
I fell back on my full size bed covered in clothes and unfitting sheets. Everything was so confusing…nothing seemed to go right the last two fucking days. I sat up again and looked around at the messy apartment I called home. On the dresser were empty cigarette boxes, dirty plates, spoons, knives, cups; I'm pretty sure I had just seen a cockroach crawl across one of them. The floor looked the same as the dresser. This place was a mess. No place for a whiny shiteing baby.
The fact I would be a father haunted me constantly. Every silence in a conversation I wondered how life would be and how it could've been if Miwako hadn't left my arse to rot in this shitty apartment. Maybe this will give me a reality check though. I mean…The nastiness of my home was starting to get to me…probably only because I couldn't find the rest of my carton of cigarettes.
I sighed as I walked into the kitchen to get a beer. Empty. Of fucking course. I slammed the door then walked into the living room to watch T.V. I sat down on the raggedy blue couch. I sank into the cushions that droop so low that I am almost consumed by them. My search for the remote was futile but I had an idea where it could be. I shoved my hand down into between the two couch cushions and move my hand around in all the nasty shite that has fallen between the cracks and pull out the remote. That couch was out to get me I swear. I tried to turn the tv onto anything interesting that I could watch.
NO FUCKING WAY!! They cancelled my cable. Shite heads. Why would they do that to me!? I paid my….bill…SHITE… that was due last week. In my frustration I threw the remote at the wall so hard that it broke into three pieces. I buried my face in my hands and sighed again. Why does this happen to me? I'll just sleep it off I guess… I got up and walked into my room to sleep. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was out….