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Lockdown
6.
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They had split up, and that was the first mistake.
As the evening settled in, the temperature was below freezing. Most houses were abandoned, half buried in snow. No footprints were visible, and the area was almost unrecognisable. In fact, Alex hadn't the foggiest idea where she was. She pulled off her right glove with her teeth, and searched her pocket for the compass. Apparently she was still heading in the right direction, but she was starting to doubt Bennett's instructions.
Surely they would have found help by now. Alex glanced behind her shoulder and considered going after Nicky. It was silly of them to split up, she realised. Fortunately the snow had ceased falling, but only for a few hours. Alex didn't want to think how mad the weather would be later on. Glove back on, she ventured a little further. If she didn't find anyone within the next half mile, she would turn back. The gun Bennett gave her was heavy, stuck in the waist of her trousers. She had never shot before, and had no intention to actually use the weapon.
The snow crunched under her boots. She shivered violently, and tried her best to ignore the pain in her fingers. It was so fucking cold. Hopefully the inmates at Litchfield were okay. Alex nearly stopped her tracks at that thought. Heck, why did she care about those women? They meant nothing to her, and their lives were not her responsibility. Why was she committing herself to this wild goose chase? If she wanted, she could run. She could find shelter, hitch hike, whatever.
But could she really do that to Piper?
Yes.
Fuck yes she could! Because of Piper, Alex had been thrown back in prison. Because of Piper, Alex was now out here freezing to death! Damn it, Alex could abandon her just like Piper had abandoned her in Paris. After all, fair was fair.
You know, two wrongs don't always make a right, baby girl. She could even hear her mother saying that. Alex scoffed. Diane was right. Two wrongs didn't make a right. That didn't mean it felt good though! And it didn't mean Piper didn't deserve to be abandoned––
Oh, what she was thinking? Even Alex had to admit she was behaving like a child.
And leaving Piper to die –– she couldn't live with herself. Would never forgive herself for giving up, for being so selfish.
Ah, hell. Who was Alex turning into?
Why did it matter so much?
Alex sneered at herself. How could she possibly still love her, after all of these years? Why couldn't she just let go, and live?
Something heavy was charging for her.
Alex frowned and turned. A large vehicle shoved its way through the snow, leaving a deep path. It was going at a high speed, and its tires were bigger than Alex. Snow sprayed in every direction, and it was like a monster; it was a monster. Alex barely had time to move out of the way. She dashed to the side, but to her surprise the vehicle came to an abrupt stop beside her.
The driver's window rolled down. A woman, with short spiky red hair, poked her head through.
'Need a lift?'
This was her chance. This was her chance to escape. To live her own life and get away for good. To survive. Alex stared at the woman briefly. Thought about Nicky. She was out there, and might already be searching for Alex. Would it truly be wrong of Alex to leave her as well? Nicky would find help, just like Alex had done. Survival of the fittest.
In a world like this, only the cruel were the last standing.
'Yeah,' Alex replied.
'Get in the back. We're heading to the ferries before the ocean freezes over completely.'
Alex opened the car door, and jumped into the backseat. The vehicle stunk of weed and piss. She was used to such unhygienic environments though, and didn't bat an eye. Three men were in the back too, dressed in big coats, jeans and boots. The youngest was probably around forty. There was another woman seated in the passenger seat.
Alex noted the empty bottles of alcohol, the used roll-ups, cash.
'Girl like you shouldn't be walking around alone. Seen them wolves? Rip out your throat; bet they're hungry,' one of them chortled. His moustache moved with his lips. 'Sure you'd be a tasty treat,' he smirked at her, to which Alex looked away.
'Shut up, Darrel,' the woman in the passenger seat said. She peered around to look at Alex, 'Where are you going?'
'Nowhere, really. I'm searching for help.'
'Ha, not going to find help near here! Everyone left. Helicopters, trucks, and all that came to rescue 'em. Guess they left you behind?'
Alex decided not to answer that. She didn't want to go through the trouble of informing them about the prison. 'You spoke about ferries?'
'Ah, yeah. Last one is leaving in, like, eleven hours. We're going to get it, get the fuck off this country.'
'Are you sure the ocean is safe?'
'Yeah, why not? I don't give two shits. I'm leaving. If you wanna stay in the States, then be my guest. Your funeral.'
'Best come with us, sweetheart. I'll keep you warm.'
One of the other men was watching her closely, eyes squinted. Alex wasn't entirely sure what he was trying to do, or what about her he was so fascinated in. Wisely, she ignored him, and continued to look out of the window. They were travelling at high speed; very high speed. Alex was impressed with the driver. She wasn't skidding at all.
Alex exhaled slowly. She would probably grab the last ferry too, but they all needed to find someplace warm. She pulled at her glove.
The man who was staring at her started to breathe heavily. So heavily the other passengers had turned their attention to him, 'Oi, Sam, what's wrong with you?' Sam said nothing, but he was now staring at Alex with venom in his eyes. Alex frowned at him, puzzled. She hadn't done anything wrong to displease him, had she? Darrel glanced at Alex, then back at Sam. 'You don't like her? Why don't you like her?'
Again, no response.
Alex realised Sam was a mute.
His eyes burned into her. He was completely glued to her face. His lips curled, and his fists clenched. Alex tensed, and felt for her gun.
Her gun.
It was then she realised her weapon was viewable. Sam had seen her weapon.
He thought she was a threat.
'What's that you got there?' Darrel demanded, hardening his expression.
'What's she got there?'
'Got a piece.'
'A what?'
The vehicle came to an abrupt halt. Alex nearly fell forwards by the impact. She was about to reach for the door handle, make her escape, but Darrel reached over and grabbed her by the collar. 'She got a piece, a'right.' He shoved the weapon out of her trousers, 'You minx. Think you could've shot us all down and taken the car, eh?'
Alex scrunched up her nose. His breath stunk.
It was awfully quiet for a moment.
'Get her out!'
In a matter of seconds, the door opened and Alex was thrown onto her back. The snow was a soft landing, but it was dark and cold. There were no lights. Darrel jumped out of the vehicle after her, but before Alex could flee, he grabbed her arm. Alex whirled around, and sent her knee into his groin. Before she reached, he swung his leg at her feet, tripping her over.
Alex's arm twisted–– crack.
She yelled out, her voice echoing into the freezing night.
Instantly she felt dizzy, and sick. Darrel let her arm go. It fell limply beside her, useless. Alex groaned, tried to find her feet, but Darrel kicked her in the stomach. She collapsed onto her front, her glasses slipping off her nose. Darrel grinned, and deliberately stepped onto her glasses. She heard the crunch, and could barely see his boot squash her glasses into the snow.
'Oh. Oh, dear.'
'Darrel, come on! Leave her for the wolves!'
'All right. Coming. Hm. You might need a little seasoning.' With that, he kicked the snow, spraying it over her. Alex winced, and remained on the ground. She heard his heavy boots walk past her, heard him step into the vehicle. One of them laughed. The redhead swore at Alex. The car door was shut, and the vehicle roared into life.
Drove away, away, away.
The silence was as unforgiving as the tears threatening to break free. Alex scowled, and didn't move for over ten minutes. Darrel had broken at least one of her ribs, broken her right arm, and also ruined her glasses. Not to mention they had stolen her gun.
And, bizarrely, she had to laugh. It was a disturbing laugh, one which rattled through her chest, and choked out of her throat.
Was this it, then? Was this her fate?
Betraying her friend, abandoning her, only to end up dead in the snow, eaten by wolves?
Alex inhaled sharply. Rolled onto her side, and coughed aggressively. She wiped her mouth with her left hand, felt for her right. She felt for any blood, hoping that it might be fixable, that maybe her arm was just numb and her nerves would start working properly again.
There was no blood.
'Fuck,' Alex whispered. She tried to find her glasses in the snow, but failed miserably.
What was the point? They were broken anyway.
Alex tried to stand. The first time, she slipped, but her working hand was able to balance her. Her chest scorched with agony, and she scrunched her eyes tightly as she attempted to stand again. Her legs shook under her weight, and her feet hurt from the cold.
She raised her head. Squinted.
It was pitch black.
Alex exhaled quickly. Held her breath.
She couldn't see anything.
She had no idea where she was.
Her body rippled with terror. She started to tremble, teeth started to chatter, head started to burn. Oh, God. Oh, God. She was alone. She was alone in the cold, in the dark, and she was surely going to die. Alex pressed her lips together, and roughly wiped away a few tears.
Cautiously, Alex took one step, and then another, and then another.
All the while, thinking, over and over, why me?
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They had been searching for over three hours. Jacob was beginning to doubt they would find anybody, but fortunately his wife was holding onto some hope. Piper was restless, and never tore her eyes from the window. Their jeep continued through the deep snow, tearing away at the thick, white blanket. The headlights were their only source of light, and all they had seen was snow, abandoned houses, and trees. Piper's eyes were wide, and every time she saw something, her heart would pounce in her chest, and she would pray it was Alex or Nicky.
Or anybody.
'Take a right,' Hannah said.
Jacob obeyed. They drove on for another thirty minutes.
No sign of any living creature.
Piper swallowed. No, no, no –– they couldn't stop. They had to keep looking. If they kept looking, then they would find Alex and Nicky eventually.
They had to!
'What's that?'
'What?'
'That.'
Piper looked at Jacob, then in the direction he was pointing.
'It looks like... a light,' Hannah said.
Piper narrowed her brows. It did look like a light. It was moving right and left, sometimes shining into the window. 'A torch,' Jacob realised, 'It's a torch. I think–– I think there's someone out there.' He swerved a little to the left. Piper pressed her palms together, staring at the light, hoping, hoping, please, please, please be Alex. Please be Alex. Oh, please, be Alex. 'It's a person! Holy shit.' He slammed down on the brake, and all three escaped the jeep.
Hannah called out once they were out. 'Who's there? Hello?'
'Hello!?' A woman. It was a woman.
Piper widened her eyes, her heart in her mouth. She knew that voice. She raced forwards, passed Jacob who called out her name. She knew that voice. The torch light started to come nearer, and then she exclaimed, 'Nicky!'
'Chap–– Oh, fuck!' The torch light moved at a rapid pace as Nicky ran over to her.
'Nicky! Nicky! Nicky!'
Their bodies collided together. Piper instantly wrapped her arms around the other woman's waist, and pulled her into a tight hug. 'Shit, oh shit,' Nicky mumbled into her coat. She returned the embrace, and didn't stop swearing until Piper let her go. Nicky was red in the face, makeup smudged, and her lower lip had turned a dark blue. She didn't look herself. In fact, Piper wasn't sure if it was her. 'How the fuck did you get out, Chapman?'
'Poussey and Taystee helped. I've been looking for you and Alex for–– Is Alex with you?'
Nicky loosened her expression. She shook her head. 'No, man, we split up. She's not with you?'
Piper didn't answer. She walked past Nicky and stopped.
Alex was not here.
Jesus.
Oh, Jesus.
Piper covered her mouth with her hand. Alex was out there, all alone in the dark! She shook violently, and, for a moment, felt as if her knees would collapse beneath her. Alex was out there. Alex was out there. She turned around. Jacob had removed his coat and wrapped it around Nicky, and was now encouraging her to get into the jeep.
Nicky looked over at Piper, 'She hasn't gone that way.'
'Which way did she go?' Piper asked.
'I–– Fuck, I don't know. She continued that way,' Nicky pointed to the right.
'We have to go! We have to go that way! Come on, we need to get into the jeep and––'
'Chapman, stop,' Hannah grabbed Piper by the wrist. 'We're heading back now. Your friend is freezing and I need to check if she has frostbite. We can't keep going. I promise, we'll head back out as soon as there's daylight. But we can't find anybody right now.'
'No–– We have to go!'
'If your wife has survived this long, she'll survive overnight.'
Piper went stiff.
A horrid chill crawled up her spine.
She bit down on her lower lip. Tried to catch her breath, tried to breathe. Her left eye twitched, and she realised, she realised, what this meant. She had to leave Alex to fend for herself. She had to abandon her again. Piper looked in the direction Alex had supposedly gone. Would she survive until tomorrow? Would she make it?
Or... were they already too late?
Piper found her voice. It was weak and pathetic.
'I need her.'
'I know. I'm sorry.'
'I can't go back. I can't go back without her.' Piper looked at Hannah, and allowed the tears to fall. She sniffed, ran her hands down her face. 'I can't do that. She's all I've got. Please, can't you–– Can't we take Nicky back and then look for Alex?' By this point, Jacob had already escorted Nicky into the warmth of the jeep. She clenched her fists, 'Please. Please, I swear –– if we don't find her I'll –– I'll stop pestering you, but please don't make me leave her.'
Hannah sighed, and folded her arms. She looked at the jeep, dropped her gaze.
'Please let me try.'
In the dark, Piper could not read her expression, could not decipher her thoughts, so all she had to rely on was the quiet.
Then, Hannah's voice finally broke through. A quiet voice, 'Fine. Fine, we will try again as soon as your friend is safe.'
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When they returned to the shelter, Nicky was barely conscious. Piper was losing patience, and she was desperate; she was going mad. She waited at the open window where they slipped through, eyes peeled for Jacob to come back. He had gone on ahead to the room with the fire. There, they lie Nicky down and have Jacob's wife check on her. After ten minutes, he came into view, and without a word, the two of them headed back out and into the jeep.
Neither said a word.
All they heard was the heavy tires of the jeep. Crashing through the snow.
Piper continued to hope.
They had to find her.
They had to.
After an hour, they passed the location they found Nicky. And made a right.
'Keep a lookout,' Jacob said.
Empty houses passed. Trees covered in snow were beginning to fall to the side by the weight. It was starting to get lighter. The night was turning to dawn. Piper pressed her palm against the glass.
They had to find her.
They had to find her.
Jacob pointed forwards, 'Hey, look. Tyre marks. Someone else has driven down this road.'
Piper's heart skipped a beat. 'What?' He was right. Two pairs of tyres had created a path in the snow. Somebody else had been here. It seemed almost instinctive to follow them. Maybe Alex had trudged down this path too? Maybe she saw the tracks and thought help might be near? Piper's hand slipped from the window.
Another hour passed.
Jacob exhaled heavily, and started to slow down. 'Find anything?'
Piper said nothing in response.
The first few snowflakes began to fall.
Then more.
And more.
Jacob cursed under his breath. 'We need to go back soon. I don't want to get trapped in a snowstorm.'
'We won't,' Piper snapped. 'Keep going.'
'I'll do what I can.'
The tyre marks had made a swerve further on. As if the vehicle had slipped. Piper found that rather peculiar. Never once did the tyre marks swerve. In fact, whoever had driven the vehicle seemed to be very much in control. As they passed the swerved track, Piper glanced down at the snow. There were prints. Footprints.
'Stop!' She screamed.
Jacob slammed his foot onto the brake. The jeep skidded against the ice, and came to a halt.
'What?!'
Piper opened the door, and nearly tripped on her way out. He didn't wait for Jacob. Instead, she rushed back to the swerved tyre marks. The snow darted into her eyes, like knives, and she winced at the pain. Piper wiped her face with her gloved hand, and soon reached the footprints. She knelt down, and studied them briefly, before raising her gaze.
The person had turned left. She stood up, and began to ran.
'What the–– Chapman!'
She was out of control, she was in a daze, she ran. She was barely aware of her feet moving. Piper ran. She ran as fast she possibly could. The snow collapsed around her, her feet roughly shoving it out of the way. The snowflakes melted onto her coat, until they began to layer. One layer on top of the other. Her lips were stinging, her cheeks too numb, eyes wide open, desperate.
Legs strong and quick. The footprints were disappearing.
But she had to be close. She had to be close.
Piper gritted her teeth. It had to be.
Please.
'Alex!'
Her voice rang in the frozen air.
'Alex!'
Tears stung her eyes. She exclaimed, ignored the tears as they trickled down her cheeks.
'Alex!' By now, her lungs were aching. She was running too fast. She wasn't getting enough oxygen into her lungs; they needed to breathe. Her voice broke at the weight of her labour, 'Alex!' The snow was deeper, deeper still. Her ankles felt like they might break. Calves shuddering, tearing. Thighs losing their strength. Her chest heaved. 'Alex!'
Piper saw the footprints had made a left.
And then, that was when she saw her.
Alex had stopped walking. She was holding herself, hunched over slightly, one arm limp at her side. Had she heard Piper? Had she heard her voice, stopped and waited for her? Piper gasped. Alex was horribly pale, squinting in the light. Piper yelled. 'Alex!' It was her. It was her. Alex was there! Piper lunged for her, and suddenly Alex was in her arms, suddenly Alex was pressed against her, and she was alive, and she was breathing, and she was here.
Her fingers dug into Alex's coat, and she held her, held her ever so tightly she could barely breathe.
She clung to her, and felt Alex's tense shoulders loosen at her touch.
She was alive.
Piper burst into tears.
There was absolutely no rationale behind her weeping. She didn't know if she was overjoyed. If she was in shock. If she was just so deeply in love with this woman she nearly lost forever. Piper shook, and felt a heavy hand tearing her away from Alex. She struggled, and continued to hold onto her, but this heavy hand was strong and big.
She couldn't hold on.
Jacob took Piper's face in his hands to control her. 'We have to go back!'
Before Piper could resister what he had said, Jacob had moved over to Alex. He said something to her, and Alex barely gave a response. Piper wiped her eyes, and could finally see clearly. Alex's nose was a darker shade, it didn't look right. The skin was peeling, and the tip of her nose was the same colour as coal. Her arm wasn't moving at all; it was dead at her side. She was blind; her glasses were gone. Her cheeks were a deep red, but the rest of her face was as white as snow. Her lips were chapped, black in the corner, and eyes were only slightly open.
Piper was horrified.
They had to go back before the cold took Alex's life completely.
'Get back to the jeep. I've brought a spare coat.' Jacob threw the keys at Piper and he then proceeded to help Alex to the vehicle. He slung her working arm around his shoulders. Fortunately, he was a good four inches taller, and could manage most of her weight.
Piper didn't need telling twice. Watery eyed, she turned on her heel and dashed for the jeep.
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