A/N I knooowwww it's been like 8 years since I last updated and I apologize. I really have no legitimate excuse. Basically, I just started at a knew school with a bunch of people I don't know and all my friends live an hour away and it's just been incredibly overwhelming and hard for me. I've been focusing on getting my schoolwork done and I'm usually up late studying so I haven't had time to update (until now because I got my homework done early and it's a weekend, yaayy!) and then I missed school because I had dental surgery (my mouth still hurts) and I had to catch up and it's just been one great big mess. I'm so sorry for not updating, but it's likely that I won't be able to update very often until I'm on Thanksgiving break (I will update before then, just not very often). I'm so sorry if this chapter is boring/moves very quickly. I have ideas for what's going to happen later in the story, I'm just having trouble figuring out what to write to lead up to them so that it doesn't seem to happen too fast. Anyways, now that I'm done talking about all my drama, enjoy this chapter! :)
Max POV
It's the second week of October, and Fang and Lissa have been dating for three weeks. Just giving everyone out there an update in case you were interested.
It's Friday night and I'm getting ready to meet Nudge and Fang (and probably Lissa) at friday night lights, which is basically just our schools fancy word for a football game.
(A/N I know absolutely NOTHING about football so I have no idea if the football season continues on into October but for the sake of this chapter let's just say that it does)
My hair is still slightly damp from my shower but I don't have the patience to try and dry it. I throw on a white V-neck with a maroon coloured zip up hoodie and my blue jeans with tears in the knees, I then grab my favourite pair of white converse from my closet as Ella walks through my bedroom door.
"Is that really what you're wearing Max?" she asks as she crosses her arms.
I look down at my outfit "what's wrong with this?" I ask.
"Oh Max..." Ella trails off shaking her head, I still don't see what's wrong with my outfit, it's just a football game, not a beauty pageant.
"We have to leave in five minutes so hurry up and get downstairs" Ella says sounding agitated, who peed in her cornflakes this morning?
I roll my eyes as she exists the room, closing the door behind her. I apply a thin layer of eyeliner and mascara and head downstairs.
"Were leaving Mom!" I yell as I grab the car keys and walk out the door, "Okay sweetie! You guys have fun!" I hear my mom reply.
It's a home game, and our school is within walking distance but since it'll be dark by the time it's over were taking my mom's car.
As I start up the car and pull out of the drive way, I notice that Ella's already turned on the radio and started blasting pop music, even though it's a five minute
drive and she won't be able to listen to more then two songs at the most.
When we arrive at school it takes me ages to find a parking spot because were a little late, which is not my fault by the way, no matter what Ella says.
After I've parked we get out of the car and head towards the bleachers by the football field and immediatley start looking for our friends in the crowd, I spot Nudge with Fang and of course, Lissa, near the top of the bleachers.
Iggy's somewhere on the football field warming up, I can never tell him apart from the other guys when their dressed in those uniforms.
As Ella and I make our way up the stairs of the bleachers I look around and notice that everyone is dressed in school colours, some guys even painted their faces... talk about taking it a little too far.
We reach the top of the bleachers and greet everyone, and of course, Lissa ends up sitting in between Fang and I, not that I mind of course...because that wouldn't make any sense.
Seeing as it's October, the evenings have grown colder and I look over and notice that Lissa has Fang's jacket wrapped around her and she's leaning her head on his shoulder, they're cute, they really are.
"So Max, got your eye on anyone?" Lissa asks me as the game starts, "Very funny" I say laughing, I've never been the 'boyfriend' type of girl, well at least not since...well you know.
"I'm serious!" Lissa laughs in reply, I notice Fang smirk out of the corner of my eye.
"So am I", I reply.
"What about Dylan? I think I heard Fang mention something about him once"
"Yeah, I mentioned that she hates him" Fang chuckled, wrapping his arm around Lissa's shoulder.
I roll my eyes and look at Fang "Did you forget to tell her that he threw me into a swimming pool fully clothed?"
"Maybe..." Fang trailed off.
"You know, when I was little my mom always told me that if a boy makes fun of you it means that he likes you", Lissa adds in.
"Yeah well, I think that throwing the girl you like into a pool it taking it a little too far" I say as something, obviously something important judging by the cheering in the crowd, happens down on the field.
I look over to see Ella has her eyes glued to the field. It's obvious that she's watching Iggy, it's also been fairly obvious that Iggy likes her back. I just wish one of them would ask the other out already and spare the rest of us the sight of them constantly ogling at one another.
I guess Iggy and I will have to have a little chat after the game is over, if he keeps Ella waiting she's going to think he doesn't like her and then I'll be the one stuck living with a bawling Ella for a month.
Eventually the game ends and we all go out to the parking lot to meet Iggy, soon he comes walking out of the school carrying his bag over his shoulder. His hair is glistening with sweat and I see his eyes light up a he looks at Ella.
"Hey Ells" he says, ignoring the rest of us.
"Um, were here too Iggy, you could appreciate the fact that your friends, who have zero interest in football came to watch you play", Nudge says as she crosses her arms.
"Yeah yeah, I saw you guys talking through the whoolleee game so don't even pretend like any of you were watching, except for Ella of course" Iggy says grinning.
I laugh and roll my eyes, could they be any more obvious?
"What happened to Fang and Lissa? I thought I saw them up in the bleachers with you guys earlier?" Iggy asks as he runs a hand through his hair.
"I'm not sure, I'll go look for them" I leave Nudge, Iggy and Ella to talk while I go look for the happy couple. I need to talk to Fang about halloween plans anyways.
There's this big halloween festival that goes on during every weekend in October at a local amusement park and Fang and the rest of us always go. We've been going since we were kids.
During they day they have halloween activities for families and young kids, and from 6PM to midnight they only let people past the age of 13 into the park to walk through all the different haunted houses.
It's called 'The Haunt', I remember the first time I went I was scared to death, especially in the circus themed haunted house. What can I say? Clowns scare me.
Fang and I always handled getting the tickets and finding a weekend when everyone was available to go because if we didn't then we'd never end up going in the first place.
The rest of the group are awful at making plans, besides Nudge because she loves to go out and socialize and stare at all the 'cute boys'.
I turn the corner around the back of the school, I'd just checked the bleachers to see if we'd lost them back there but didn't find them.
The field and the bleachers had been empty, but a little ways farther down the wall of the school I see Fang and Lissa.
Fang has Lissa pinned against the wall of the school and I can see his breath in the cold, autumn air. They stand there and stare into each others eyes for a couple seconds before I see Fang slowly lean in and press his lips to hers.
At first it's soft, gentle, and then I see Lissa wrap her arms around Fang's neck as they start to make out.
I realize that this is kind of a private moment and slowly walk away, back towards the bleachers, making sure the my footsteps are soft on the ground so that they don't hear me.
Once I've established a safe distance I look up and see one person is now sitting in the bleachers, I recognize him as Dylan.
It's strange, usually he would've already found a girl to go make out with and left by now, which is his usual routine.
I make my way towards him and climb up the stairs until I reach the row of benches that he's sitting on.
He notices my prescence and looks up from his feet. As I get closer to him I notice that there are faint marks of tear streaks running down his face.
I sit down next to him and we sit in silence.
After several minutes I speak up "So why is Dylan, super jock and womanizer, sitting in the stands by himself after winning a big game?" I ask, turning my head towards him.
"I really don't need this right now Max" Dylan says gruffly as he grabs his bag from next to him and stands up, readying himself to walk away.
I stand up and stop him from walking away, "Sit down Dylan" I say.
"Why should I?"
"Because I told you to, and if you want to get past me you'll have to hit me in the face or something. And despite the fact that I think you're a total asshat I know that you wouldn't actually hit me" I state, giving him a pointed look.
Dylan sighs and sits back down, letting his bag drop at his feet.
He sit's there in silence, I look at him and see something in his eye's that I used to see in Sam's all the time. He throw's his head down into his hand's and begins to sob.
"Listen, I don't know what's wrong with you, or why you're crying. You don't have to tell me what's wrong, you don't even have to say anything in reply to this, but whatever's going on I can tell that it's not just a one time thing. I've seen that look in some else's eyes before and I just wasn't smart enough to recognize it. Were not friends, we've never been friends but if there's something going on and you're hurting then you can tell me. There's something going on here that's making you hurt and believe it or not I care enough to tell you that you can talk to me, because I don't want to see you end up like... anyways, whoever or whatever made you this upset, just know that I'm here" I say.
After several seconds of silence I get up and start walking down the stairs of the stands to go find Ella.
"Max?" I hear from behind me.
I turn around and see that Dylan has lifted his head out of his hands "Thanks", he croaks and gives me a weak smile.
I nod my head and head back to the parking lot, knowing that Ella will be upset with me for taking so long.
As I reach my car I see a note stuck in between my wind shield wipers.
Max, got tired of waiting for you.
Hopefully you weren't murdered or anything because then I'd feel bad for writing this note.
Anyways, Iggy is giving me a ride home. Hope you're not dead.
XOXO - Ella
I laugh and put the note in my pocket, Ella can be a pain in the ass but I love the crap out of her.
Once I get home I hang my car key's up on one of the small hooks beside the door and make my way upstairs.
I'm exhausted and worried about Dylan.
Geeze, I never thought I'd actually be worried about Dylan, in fact I never thought that I'd even think about anything but punching him in the face.
After I've slipped on one of Fang's old t-shirts that he left at my house ages ago, and a pair of grey pajama shorts I slip under my covers and stare at the ceiling.
I hear a soft knock at my door, "Come in" I say as I sit up in my bed and look at the glowing face of Ella.
"Hey Max" Ella says, she's grinning like the Cheshire cat.
I sigh, despite the fact that I have a million things on my mind and I'm incredibly tired I tell Ella to sit down and spill.
"Thank you so sooo much for taking forever to get back and drive me home after the football game you're absolutely amazing!" Ella beams and hugs me.
"Ohhhh did something happy with a certain tall, strawberry blonde football player this evening?" I tease her.
"Yes!" Ella shrikes so loud that I think my window is going to shatter.
"So the parking lot was practically empty and I was standing by the car waiting for you so Iggy offered to drive me home and on the way there he told me that he really likes me and that he's been really nervous about asking me out and so I was like 'so are you asking me out?' and he was like 'is that a yes?' and obviously I said yes"
"You sound like Nudge" I say laughing, "But I'm really happy for you Ells, I think everyone's been waiting for you two to confess your undying love for each other" I sigh dramtically as I put a hand over my forehead, pretending to faint.
Ella smacks me with one of my pillows and rolls her eyes.
"What about you Max?"
"What about me?" I ask, raising my eyebrows.
"You and Fang? Have you guys confessed your undying love for each other yet?"
"Fang's dating Lissa, and even if he wasn't, we don't feel that way about each other" I say, laying back down in my bed.
Ella gets up and walks towards my bedroom door, "He may like Lissa, and she's really great but he loves you, anyone could see that. You just have to give him time to tell you" she says as she exits my room, closing the door behind her.
After I'm sure Ella's not coming back into my room to talk to me again I reach under my bed and grab hold of a small wooden box.
I carefully set it on my lap and open the lid, looking over it's contents.
It contains several polaroid photos of Sam and I, a bracelet that he gave me when we first started dating, an old mix CD of his favourite songs to listen to when it was raining and a bunch of handwritten notes he'd passed to me during class to keep me from falling asleep.
I can feel tears welling up in my eyes as I begin to read one of my favourite notes from Sam.
It was written on a scrunched up piece of lined paper that he had clearly ripped out of his binder at the time.
Dear Max, I know you hate math class, you really do.
And I know that it's boring and that you don't care what the square route of 82 or 78 is.
But if you fall asleep, you'll get detention, and I'd hate that because I was really looking forward to hanging out with you after school today, and that won't
happen if you're stuck here :(
So, in the interest of putting a smile on your face in this room of misery, I'd just like to say...
I love you, I love you more than I love my favourite record or my old ratty jean jacket that I know you hate.
I love you more than anyone has ever loved anyone ever, and that's a lot.
You're the best thing in my life.
You're the first thing I think about when I wake up, and the last thing I think about before I fall asleep.
I could sit and stare at your face all day, and if I got a dollar for every time I found myself thinking about you I'd be the richest 15 year old on the planet.
The point of all this is, that math class ends in 10 minutes, and then I can kiss you.
So please don't fall asleep, again.
I love you,
Sam.
Several of my tear drops have landed on the paper by this point and I'm only crying harder.
I'm in the 11th grade and it's been two years since he's been gone, but it doesn't hurt any less.
I know I'm supposed to have gotten over it by now, but I can't and I don't think that I ever will, it's too hard and it hurts too much.
I glance over at my clock, it reads 1:17AM, knowing Fang he'll still be awake watching Netflix but I can't keep running to him every time I get upset over something that happened two years ago.
Plus, he has a girlfriend and she's the priority now.
I should've known when they started dating that she'd come first, but I was convinced that nothing would change.
I thought that Fang and I would keep hanging out on weekends and stay as close as we've been our whole lives, but that was naive of me.
I don't blame Fang or Lissa, their a couple and they should be spending more time together than they are with anyone else.
Fang is still my best friend, but I need to learn to deal with things on my own from now on.
I stay up, a million thoughts racing around in my brain, until I can't keep my eyes open anymore and I slowly drift off into a black abyss.
A/N I tried to make this chapter longer to make up for my lack of updating recently :) Hope you guys liked it, please review! :* Also, I edited this at 1AM so if there are a few mistakes I apologize.