Chapter 5: Night in the Woods

We last left the duo with Sephiroth. As far as we know it, Sephiroth is still stuck in the tree.

"GO AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE!" Sephiroth yelled as he clutched onto the tree trunk.

"You know…if he wanted us to leave, why didn't he use his sword in the first place?" Mona asked under her breath so only Kris could hear. Kris didn'tpay attentionsince she was still staring at Sephiroth and drooling.

"Sephiroth…Sephiroth…" She droned with her eyes fixed on the bishounen.

Sephiroth looked at Mona. Both exchanged looks that were easily read as the "Who the crap is he/her?" types before...

"Well?" Sephiroth asked bitterly.

"What?" Mona gripped the Chocobo Egg defensively.

"Aren't you going to do something?"

"Uhm…yah…I was just about to leave you two here and search for Chaos-0." Mona responded, realizing that if Kristen found Sephiroth, maybe she could find Chaos the same way.

"Wait…you mean you aren't going to be weird around me?"

"Of course not! Why should I be!"

"And that's because…?"

"I never got the chance to play Final Fantasy Seven or got a Playstation system so I'm not really a big fan of you…" Mona replied.

"Oh…" It took Sephiroth only a few more seconds to realize that Mona had already walked at least twelve meters in another direction into the forest. "HEY! YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME HERE WITH HER!"

"Try to stop me." She replied coldly before walking off.

"I got mouthed off by a teenager…and one that's searching for a monster composed of water…" Sephiroth groaned before realizing Kris had somehow climbed up the tree and was clutching his leg.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"MY BISHIE!"

Mona continued walking through the jungle/forest, still hearing Sephiroth's screaming and Kris's fangirly squeals.

"Okay…if I were Chaos where would I be?" She murmured, still carrying the Chocobo Egg.

"YAAAIIEEE!"

Mona's thoughts were immediately cut off when Sephiroth ran her over as he tried to escape Kris. Kris, on the other hand, tripped over Mona and crashed.

"MY BISHIE!" Kris wailed. Mona's eyes widened once she saw the Chocobo Egg rolling downhill.

"MY BABY!" The brunette shrieked, throwing the stunned Kris off her back and running after the egg. Fortunately she grabbed it in time; unfortunately…there were huge rocks on the path. "OWOWOWOW!" Mona crashed into a flat limestone before slumping forwards.

Kris caught up with the almost flat brunette who still clutched onto the egg.

"What did you mean by 'Baby'?" She asked in confusion.

"Muff Mup…" Mona growled bitterly.

Sephiroth continued running before reaching a small lake.

"I think I lost her…" He gasped before drinking some of the pure water on the surface. Right in the middle of one of his slurps, Sephiroth saw two glowing, green, vicious eyes glaring at him. "Oh great…a water demon…" The silver haired bishounen muttered before Chaos Zero's fist connected with his stomach sending Sephiroth flying back into the forest.

"BLURBLE-BLURBLE-BLURBLE-BLURBLE-BLURBLE!" Chaos snarled before diving back into the water. (Due to the rating, we will not repeat the translation of Chaos's threat)

After Mona was peeled off the rock, she still had a flat personage as Kris hauled her on the ground.

"Are you going to be okay traveling like this?" Kris asked.

"As-OUCH-long as-OWIE-we don't-OOF-go over-OW-any-EEEH-rocks-OUCH!" Mona replied as Kris accidentally bumped her friend into some rocks on the trail and nearly had her crash into a pile of sticks. "Where the-OUCH-crap is Sephiroth anyway?"

"….aaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

"I had to ask…" Mona twitched before Sephiroth crash landed on them.

All three of the humans were in a pile of arms, legs, hair, and let's not forget the Masamune sword.

"Sephiroth! You're going to stab me in the stomach if you keep THAT up!" Mona yelled from under the pile. The trio got back on their feet and Mona (who regained her normal form) went to inspect the Chocobo Egg. "You're okay sweetie? Don't worry, everything's okay…"

"WILL YOU STOP DOING THAT!" Kris asked annoyed by how her friend was acting like a stereotyped mother.

"It's my baby…" Mona shrugged, rubbing her cheek against the egg. Kris' only response was to roll her eyes and grumble.

"If you're not too busy we should probably be looking for Chaos Zero." She said.

"Chaos Zero? Wait, is he mainly composed of water?" Sephiroth asked.

"Yes?" Mona blinked, losing focus on babying the egg. "Did you see him?"

"Of course I did! The thing practically punched me in the stomach and threw me over here!"

"Where is he?"

"…by the lake." Sephiroth pointed.

"THANK YOU!" Mona grinned before running over Sephiroth during her mad dash in the direction the silver-haired bishounen pointed out.

"Sephie? Are you okay?" Kris asked, poking him.

'Sephie' (Clears throat) Sephiroth issued a growl.

"Don't call me Sephie…" Sephiroth replied, getting to his feet.

"Okay my bishie…"

Sephiroth shot her a glare before running in the direction of Chaos Zero's hideout.

Mona finally arrived at the lake. She continued looking at the body of water before sitting down.

"Let's see…how did Eggman call him again?" Mona scratched her head before a thought entered her mind. "Of course!"

She stood back up and raised a hand to her mouth.

"Chaaaaossss…"

Nothing…

Mona paused before her eye twitched.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT DIDN'T WORK!" She shrieked before aiming a sharp kick at a rock that went sailing into the lake. Unfortunately this sent a huge wall of water spraying out. It also threw out a very confused Chaos Zero.

"BLURBLE?"

"Oh…crap…"

Chaos Zero collided with the brunette (including the egg) and they went flying backwards. The water monster reformed as Mona sat up, trying to clear her vision.

"Blurble? Blurble-blurble?" Chaos tilted its head and stared at her before looking at its water dwelling. "BLURBLE!" All the water was gone and all that could be seen was dirt and the rock Mona threw in.

"Oh…shoot…uh…sorry about that…" Mona cringed. Chaos Zero's eyes narrowed before it shook its head.

"Blurrble…" It replied before Sephiroth flew at him in an attempt to use the horse-cut technique (Imperfeciton: saw it in a Samurai Jack episode…eh-he…). "BLURBLE!"

"HAI-YAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Mona's eyes widened before narrowing and she stormed in between Sephiroth and Chaos-0. This was pretty easy for her since Sephiroth had gone into slow motion for effect.

"What exactly are you doing?" She grumbled as Sephiroth stopped in mid-air and Chaos-0 reformed from its nervous puddle-like state.

"You ruined my Matrixy maneuver!" Sephiroth cursed before landing in time for Kris to bowl him over.

"MY BISHIE!"

"Oh not again…"

"Okay…why don't we just set up camp and forget this happened?" Mona asked, still holding onto the egg.

"Alright fine…we can have some scrambled eggs while we're at it." Sephiroth muttered and glanced at Mona who had suddenly clutched the egg really close to herself and began hissing and baring her teeth as though she were a peeved Arbok. "Or we can find berries…"

"Lets…" She hissed.

A while later, the group of four (plus one egg) were sitting around a campfire. Somehow Kris managed to locate a traveling Chinese eatery and bought a bunch of different oriental foods. They didn't manage to touch any of the Lo Mien since Mona had somehow managed to eat it all after dumping it in soy sauce.

"MINEMINEMINE! IT'SALLMINE! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

…yeah…

As Mona was sleeping on the ground due to all the Lo Mien she had digested in one minute, Kristen, Sephiroth, and Chaos-0 were sitting down on two logs that were knocked down earlier. Kris was explaining how she and Mona got stuck in the video game and the event with the Chocobo (as she was clutching onto Sephiroth).

"…and now we don't know what we're doing…" She admitted.

"And why us?" Sephiroth gasped as he tried to relinquish Kris' grip.

"Well, we can't travel by ourselves and we picked you guys out in the battle." Kris replied, letting him go.

"What makes you think we'll help?" Sephiroth muttered as he sat down on the other log.

"Blurble-blurble! (We should!)" Chaos-0 replied before releasing a whole bunch of other 'burbles' which caused Kris and Sephiroth to give him confused looks. Of course he was talking about how it was that they were gentlemen (clears throat) and how they should help two young ladies in getting back home. "Blurble-blurble, blurble? (Don't you agree, Sephiroth?)"

It only took Sephiroth a moment to realize the translation before becoming a bit peeved. "YOU double-crossing (insert swear word)!"

"Blurb! Blurble-blurb! (What! What'd I do!)" Chaos yelped as it dove behind the log and peered back up nervously with his unblinking green eyes.

"Hey! Don't curse in front of my baby!" Mona shrieked, somehow waking up from her slumber. Everyone stared at her (again) before she realized how ridiculous this was. "Uh…I fall asleep now!" Then she fell back to sleep in a split second.

"Blur-ble… (Oh…kay…)" Chaos muttered.

Sephiroth clenched his teeth before sitting back down bitterly. "Alright, FINE! The sooner I get away from you idiots the better."

"YAAY!" Kris smiled before glomping him resulting in a suppressed yell. "I'm traveling with Sephie-kins! AWESOME!"

Chaos looked at him and shrugged. "(It could've been worse…)"

"And HOW?" Sephiroth asked.

"(Well…uh…I…I go sleep now!)" With that, Chaos-0 fell off the log and began sleeping in its puddle like state. Sephiroth only glared and resumed trying to force Kris off by any means possible (he's not going to resort to gnawing off his leg, trust me).

The rest of the night, the four were sleeping around the campfire. Sephiroth had given up trying to force Kris off his leg since she had fallen asleep clinging onto it. Chaos tossing and turning in his sleep spraying water every time he splashed back down, and Mona was still clinging onto the Chocobo Egg.

If only she had noticed it was cracking open…

The next morning, Mona was the first to wake up and see two bird feet in front of her. She immediately looked up and…

"WOOKIE-WOO!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

TBC…

"Author's Commentary"

Shadow: Well! What happens next?

Imperfection07: Can't tell you.

Shadow: PLEASE? I'll give you pocky! (Holds up a box of pocky)

Imperfection07: (glares)Forget it!

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