(New Memory)
I look at how adorable he was. We had just found a old photo album of Jared's family. And Jared was so cute. He still always had a smile. But this time he had little cubby baby cheeks to go along with it. It made me wish that Jared and I could have a baby. As did many things. Like how good he is with Jamie. Being like the Father he needs.
I saw his brothers. They looked a lot like Jared. All smiling and happy.
I saw his Father. How he looks what Jared might look in 20-30 years. I saw him fishing with all the boys. Him helping a very little Jared get a fishing hood out of his hand while Jared sobbed. Them all eating sandwiches on a row boat. I also saw how Jared took a longer time to look at these pictures.
There were a few pictures of his mom and him. They all were from his very early days of life. His mom had gotten sick a month or two after Jared was born. She had gotten some kind of infection. It had something to do with the way he was born. She had a c section and the scar healed wrong. I know it's hard for him. Seeing her. Thinking that if he hadn't been so big or was a different way. She may have lived. I think it's also one of the reasons why he doesn't want kids. Cause he could possible loose me like that.
"My dad always told me that my mom used to say that she wouldn't have changed anything. She said she won't have given me up. Even if it meant she would live." I looked at his face. He was still smiling. But it was different. It was pained. It killed me to see him like this. "Sacrifices Mothers make." He gave a small sad chuckle.
I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say. So I took the photo album out of his hands and flipped to the very beginning. His parents wedding pictures. I carefully took one out of the plastic. It was a close up of there faces in profile. As they gazed into each others eyes. Once I had the picture safely out I handed the album back to Jared who looked too warn out to protest. Stood up and walked over to the bin of empty picture frames. I found a plain black one and opened the back. I slid the photo in and closed it. I brushed off the glass and set it on top of our dresser.
Jared slowly set the album on the bed and stood up to walk over to me. He looked at what I had done and pulled me into his arms. "I love you." I told him. "I love you too baby." He hugged me tighter and whispered, almost to himself "They would have too."
(End.)