I posted this a few days ago but I wound up deleting it because I wasn't happy with it at all and I wasn't even entirely sure if it was necessary or not. But I have reworked it a little and added a bit more to the end and have decided to post it for everyone who is interested in reading. I still don't know if I'm completely happy and satisfied with it but I couldn't let it go.
…
Beth had never been the sort have dreams of her wedding since she was a little girl. She had general ideas as to what she might maybe want if the day ever came where she did get married but nothing went past the broadest of plans.
There were apple trees on the farm, a small clump of them in the back of the house, and Beth always imagined maybe getting married standing underneath them if she didn't get married in a church. She knew Daryl would get married in the church if it was what she wanted but she didn't want to make him because Daryl wasn't a church kind of guy even if he went with her sometimes on Sundays. And she knew she didn't want one of those puffy white dresses but rather something simple; something she could possibly wear more than once in her life. And she knew she definitely wanted flowers in her hair instead of wearing a veil.
But that was all she knew.
She supposed a part of her had never thought that she would get married. Who on earth would want to marry her? With her still fragile health and all of her issues stretching out for miles, who would want to willingly tie themselves to her for the rest of their lives? Deep down, she never thought she was anything special enough to have anyone in her life who would want her.
But she met Daryl Dixon and they fell in love and he actually asked her to marry him. And honestly, she didn't care about the wedding and how it turned out. She was more excited for the actual marriage and being Daryl's wife. Beth Dixon. She smiled to herself sometimes when she said that to herself. Mrs. Beth Dixon. And she felt like she was a silly schoolgirl, writing her crush's name all over her notebooks except this was true. This was really happening. She and Daryl were getting married and she didn't need some huge ceremony to make that happen.
She and Daryl went over to Merle and Annie's every Thursday after work for dinner and Beth wondered if Annie was perhaps more excited for the wedding than she was. Beth was, of course, excited to be getting married to Daryl but Annie was downright ecstatic about the whole thing.
The Thursday a couple of weeks after Daryl and Beth had told them, they went over to their house and the instant Beth stepped inside, Annie was there, holding bridal magazines in her arms and eagerly telling Beth about all of the great stuff she found.
"Oh…" Beth did her best to be polite as Annie showed her possible tuxedos for the groomsmen to wear on page twenty-six.
"I ain't wearin' no damn monkey suit," Merle frowned.
"And do you know what your colors are going to be?" Annie asked. "You can have them wear ties and boutonnieres to match the colors," she explained, turning to another page in the magazine. "Now, if you're getting married in the fall, I know, I know. Orange is so cliché and expected but I think this faded orange is so beautiful."
Beth looked to Daryl then, her call for help desperate in her eyes, but Daryl just smirked a little and give a shrug. Beth narrowed her eyes at him then and he almost chuckled, his eyes moving to the can of beer Merle was handing to him.
"Actually, Annie…" Beth interrupted as gently as possible. "Daryl and I aren't going to have a wedding like… this," she swept her hand over the magazines.
Annie gasped then as if saying such a thing was horrifying to her. "What do you mean? What are you going to do instead?"
"Well, we haven't really talked about it," Beth said as she looked to Daryl again, his eyes settled on her, and she looked back to Annie. "Just something on my daddy's farm. Small, simple. Probably within the next couple of weeks."
"What?" Annie gasped again.
Merle broke into a grin at that. "Woman was plannin' on livin' vicariously through you, Beth," he explained.
Beth gave Annie a small smile, hoping that Annie wouldn't be too upset about the decision but a wedding like this was definitely not something she or Daryl wanted. She could hardly imagine Daryl standing in a tuxedo and just thinking about it actually almost made her want to giggle. She wondered if he would even wear a suit.
Merle and Annie had met through the prison pen-pal program and had exchanged letters for nearly a year before Annie finally gathered enough courage to visit him face-to-face. And just a few hours after his release, the two went to the courthouse and got married. Annie never got her big wedding and Annie was definitely the sort who had dreamt of having a big wedding since she was a little girl.
Annie looked to Beth now and gave a soft sigh. "Of course," she said with a slight nod. "I can't imagine either of these Dixon men in tuxedos anyway."
Beth smiled a bit wider at the thought, too. "I have been thinking though. If it's alright with you two, I was hoping to have Hank involved in the ceremony in some way. Maybe our ring bearer? You can have him wear a little suit, if you want."
Annie gasped then and the brightness returned to her face. "Yes!" She then swooped baby Hank up into her arms as he slobbered all over the head of his Brontosaurus dinosaur toy. "Merle, his first suit! Oh, he is going to be the cutest baby ever in a wedding! I think children's options are in this magazine."
She grabbed another magazine from the pile and was off again, this time, talking to Merle about all of the possibilities for baby Hank to wear and Merle's lips quickly turned down into a frown and his brow furrowed as he listened to her, arguing that no son of his was going to be dressed like some damn dandy.
Beth leaned into Daryl then. "Did you want to wear a tuxedo?" She asked him softly.
And Daryl just smirked a little before dropping his arm around her shoulders and taking a sip from his beer can.
…
Some days, Beth didn't even think about the wedding. She wasn't stressed or worried. It was almost as if marrying Daryl was one of those things that was going to happen and not that much thought or planning had to be put into it.
She had talked with her daddy about getting married underneath the apple trees and of course, Hershel had been more than happy about that, and he had volunteered speaking with Father Gabriel from their church to see about leading the ceremony. And in Beth's mind, she supposed that those were the two biggest things. Everything else could be seen to without stressing herself out over it and she didn't think any of it would take her that long at all.
And Daryl didn't seem to be thinking about the wedding at all. He worked at the garage and worked at home and went hunted and read and went about life as if nothing was different. And with Daryl clearly not stressing himself over anything, Beth didn't see why she had to.
She sat on the bed at the end of the day, writing in her journal, taking note of everything she had eaten. It wasn't something she necessarily liked doing but something she definitely had to do. She wrote down everything she had eaten that day and her current weight – if she knew it – though she and Daryl didn't keep a scale anywhere in the trailer.
She lifted her head when Daryl came into the room and she gave him a small smile.
"I eat too many Hershey bars," she informed him and he smiled a little at that as he began to take off his clothes, getting himself ready for bed.
"Prob'ly could eat more of 'em," he replied.
She finished writing and set the journal down on the nightstand and scooted over so Daryl could slip in between the covers. The room was small and the double bed was pushed against the wall, Beth's spot being the one against the wall.
"Gotcha somethin'," he said as he sat up beside her and she noticed his fingers were closed around something, fisting something in his palm.
And when he opened it and let her see what he had, she couldn't help but gasp, her hands flying to her mouth. She stared at it for a moment, as if she wasn't entirely sure that she was actually seeing it, and then she lifted her eyes to him. He was staring at her and she knew him well enough to know that he was feeling nervous about this whole thing.
He glanced down to the small diamond ring in his palm and gave his shoulders a shrug. He lifted his eyes back to her. "Just thought it was somethin' you should have," he said almost in a mumble.
"It's beautiful," she told him in a soft voice and the way his shoulders almost immediately relaxed with her words, she knew he had been worried about that.
She gave him a soft smile and without another word, she held out her left hand. His own lips twitched a little and he took the ring, guiding it onto her third finger.
"Lil' loose," he noted as he was able to spin the band around. "Don't want you to lose it," he said as he still stared down at the ring rather than her.
Beth looked down to it, too, and felt her stomach flip in the way that it always did whenever Daryl did something like this; something completely sweet and unexpected – which he did more than people probably would have thought.
"I love it," she whispered and they lifted their eyes at the same time, looking at each other and she gave him the same soft smile.
"'m sorry it's not bigger," he mumbled, starting to look embarrassed but Beth cut that off right then and there and swooped in, pressing her lips to his.
"It's perfect," she whispered to him. "Thank you. You didn't have to get me this though, Daryl."
He shrugged his shoulders. "Jus' wanted you to have somethin'. Let people know this is official," he said.
She lifted her left hand to his cheek then and pressed her lips to his because she was overcome with such a sense of emotion, she didn't trust herself to speak right then, knowing that all of that emotion would spill out and she didn't want it to. Daryl had just given her an engagement ring and they were getting married and even if her tears were going to be the happiest tears that had ever fallen, they were still tears and tears had no business being anywhere near their home right now.
…
He wore a suit. He knew Beth didn't ask him to because she never would have expected it. But he had Rick help him and he went to the store to get himself a suit because he was only going to be getting married once in his life and he didn't want to look like a fucking slob when Beth probably made herself up to look like an angel.
There wasn't a whole lot of planning. Neither of them wanted it that way. He knew that if Beth had come up to him and told him that she wanted the kind of wedding that Annie had taken upon herself to start planning for them, he knew he would have agreed to it. He wouldn't have felt comfortable and he would have been worrying about the money the whole time but there wasn't too much he wouldn't do for Beth and he guessed everyone probably already knew that.
But Beth was just like him and didn't want anything like that. She just wanted him – for some reason he still didn't get but he had taught himself not to wonder about it anymore. He just went along with it and told himself her feelings weren't going to change towards him.
They planned for the ceremony on her pop's farm, underneath some apple trees, with a few of their friends invited. Maggie and Glenn. Shawn. Rosita. Merle and Annie and Hank. Rick and Lori with Carl and Judith. Dale, Axel and his wife, Martinez and his wife and Zach. And Carol and Sophia. Just people there who they liked.
Hank could barely walk yet so Merle carried him to stand beside Daryl and Daryl actually caught himself smiling as Hank kept slapping his hands on Merle's cheeks.
But then Beth started walking towards him in her white dress with her arm through her dad's and a bouquet of wildflowers in her hand and when their eyes locked, she burst into such a bright smile, he felt like it almost knocked him over. And then she was standing in front of him, her smile still in place, and she almost giggled.
"You're wearing a suit," she then told him as if he hadn't been aware of it himself.
He smirked a little. "Figured it was a good day to dress up," he said and she did giggle then, which made him smile a bit bigger.
Father Gabriel had begun but neither Daryl or Beth seemed to be listening to him as they continued looking at one another. He knew she wasn't getting a wedding dress for the day. She had said it more than once. It was her wedding, yes, but she wanted to get a dress she could more than once. It was a bit fancier than her other dresses she wore every other day – lace and with some beading. Daryl didn't know the first thing about clothes. He just knew she was the prettiest girl he had ever seen. Always had been. And now, they were in the middle her becoming his wife.
Her hair was worn down that day and there was a wreath of flowers in her hair and Daryl looked at her, convinced she was actually glowing. He wanted to tell her how pretty she looked that day but every word he could possibly say was lumped in his throat and he couldn't even hear anything around him as he looked at her.
But then Father Gabriel said his name and he realized that it was time to speak. He glanced to the man before back to Beth and he noticed that there was the slightest hint of nervousness in her eyes now; as if she thought he wasn't really going to marry her; as if she was waiting for him to change his mind and walk away right now.
He wondered if, after they were both wearing wedding rings, they would stop bracing themselves on the edge like this, always waiting for the other to just walk out.
"I do," he said loud and clear enough for Beth to hear, staring nowhere but in her eyes, and when she smiled, he smiled, too.
…
The reception, like the ceremony, was simple. Just a backyard barbecue with music playing from Shawn's stereo and a cake that Carol had baked for them. Just simple and easy and Daryl – his suit jacket long gone and his sleeves rolled to his elbows – kept looking down to the ring on his finger and then to Beth as she talked and smiled and laughed with the other people there. He had a few "Holy shit" moments throughout the rest of the evening.
Holy shit, he was married.
Holy shit, he was a husband.
Holy. Shit. He had a wife.
And not just any wife. He had Beth. He had had her for a year now but now, she was his wife and they were forever tied to one another now. Nothing was going to break that; break them. The way Daryl saw it, they had already been through enough shit to last them a lifetime and none of that had torn them apart. Daryl knew it had taken him a while to figure it out but now, he knew it was because they loved each other.
As corny and stupid as that sometimes sounded in his head, he knew that it was that. Love. Beth loved him no matter what and he loved her. Ninety pounds or nine hundred pounds. He wouldn't stop. Just as when Beth's fingers and lips brushed along all of the scars that marred his body – scars she had been the only one to ever see – he knew that she would never run away from what she saw or the man he was.
"Here," Rick approached him, handing him a bottle of beer with one for himself, and they stood side by side, drinking and looking over the party. "You doing alright?"
Daryl looked at him then. "Yeah," he answered but he knew it came out as more like a question because why would Rick ask him that? "You think I ain't?" He asked.
Rick shrugged and smiled a little. "Standing off by yourself instead of with Beth. Was just making sure," he answered.
Daryl took a sip of beer and his eyes found Beth again, now whispering and laughing with Rosita over something and Hank was in Beth's arms. "I'm a'right," Daryl said, still watching her, and as if she could feel his eyes, Beth turned her head then and her eyes immediately fell into his and she smiled the instant she saw him.
He gave her his own small smile and she then turned her head, returning to her conversation with Rosita, Hank now trying to pull the flowers off her head and Beth seamlessly and gently moved his hands down while never missing a beat in her conversation. She laughed then at whatever Rosita was saying and it was probably something dirty or sexual because he could see Beth's blush from across the yard.
Daryl looked back to Rick. "How's things goin' with Lori?" He asked though as Rick's best friend, Daryl knew more about the Grimes' marriage than he probably wanted to ever know.
Rick shrugged. "Could be better," was all he said even though they both knew that they were pretty much only staying together at this point for the kids.
Daryl was never going to mention to him that Rosita had a crush on him. It wouldn't matter. It looked like Rick wasn't going to be divorcing Lori anytime soon and it wasn't as if Rosita was the sort to make a move on a still married man. She may have been a flirt but Daryl had gotten to know her and he knew she wasn't that kind of girl. He wondered if Rick ever noticed the way she smiled at him though.
Instead, Daryl just nodded. "Thanks for comin' today," he said.
Rick smiled at him. "Of course, man." He slapped a hand on his back. "I couldn't be happier for you and Beth." He looked to Beth for a second before looking back to him. "So, what are you two gonna do now?" He asked.
Daryl took a sip of his beer and shook his head slightly. "Go home. Go to work tomorrow," he said because he didn't know what else they would do. They were married but nothing was really different in their lives. They were together and lived together and already had a life together.
They just had to keep going with that life.
…
Dale gave them the next couple of days off, telling them that even if they weren't going on a honeymoon, they were still newlyweds and should enjoy that time. And Daryl was always glad to be living in the middle of the woods, away from people, because Beth could get as loud as she wanted and the night of their wedding, she definitely seemed determined to break her previous noise record.
And afterwards, as they laid there, sweaty and panting and trying to catch their breaths, Daryl couldn't help but feel a little proud of himself for the way he had gotten her to scream. That whole male pride thing. Beth rested her head on his chest and Daryl sifted his fingers through her hair, his eyes caught sight of the ring now around his finger and he stared at it for a moment before he broke out into a small smile. As if Beth could feel it on his face, she lifted her head and looked up at him, smiling faintly when she saw his smile.
"What?" She wondered.
He shook his head. "Nothin'," he answered. "Jus' was a good day today."
She laughed softly at that and scooted herself up a bit so she could press a light kiss to his cheek. "The best day," she murmured against his skin.
They both fell quiet. Crickets chirped and an owl hooted somewhere outside. The rest of the world was blanketed with the silence that came with nighttime.
Daryl listened as Beth slowly began to drift off to sleep and his fingers continued combing through her hair. Despite the business of the day – and the business of their night – he didn't feel tired. He felt like his mind was racing a mile a minute and he couldn't get it to stop long enough for him to fall asleep, too.
He was thinking of Rick's question again.
"So, what are you two gonna do now?"
And Daryl thought he had had the answer just hours earlier but now, lying there, feeling Beth's warm breath exhaling across his chest as she slept peacefully, he realized that he had absolutely no idea what to do. He didn't know the first thing about being a husband; how to have a wife or be married.
How had Merle figured it out? Merle had been more fucked up than him but he had a wife and a baby and a job and house and Merle was doing pretty well for himself by anyone's standards. Daryl had the house – trailer but that was a technicality – the job and now, he had the wife and he had no idea what the fuck to do now.
…
The day after their wedding was like any other day. It was Sunday and Beth pulled herself from the bed to take a shower and to get herself ready to go to service and Daryl laid there, watching as she came back into the bedroom, a towel wrapped around her body and another rubbing through her hair.
"Wan' me to come with you?" He asked.
She smiled at him from over her shoulder before looking at herself in the mirror and picking up her comb on the dresser. "You can if you like. It's up to you."
Daryl laid there for another moment and listened as she began humming a song to herself. He usually went hunting on Sundays, spending hours on end out in the woods but at the moment, he and Beth didn't need any meat. The refrigerator was crammed to the brim with leftovers from their wedding barbecue and Daryl loved to hunt but he only did so when the food was needed. And he loved being out in the woods by himself but he felt this need to stick with Beth today because he was a husband now and isn't that what husbands and wives did? They stuck together?
When he pulled himself out of bed with a grunt and walked past her for the bathroom, he could see the corners of her mouth upturned in a small smile.
…
She knew it wasn't his favorite thing to do. The pews were too hard and the church was too hot and Father Gabriel talked too much. But she was happy he had come with her that morning – even if she could feel his embarrassment from beside her when Father Gabriel congratulated the newly wedded couple after his sermon and the others in the congregation echoed the sentiment.
After service, Daryl stood beside her as people came up to them to congratulate them and give well wishes and Beth smiled and thanked them and answered questions about the ceremony that some had. A few asked if she and Daryl would start on a family right away and though those questions made the back of her neck pricked, she managed to just keep smiling and say that she and Daryl wanted it to be just them for a while.
She would look up at Daryl occasionally and she knew he was uncomfortable with so much attention on him but he didn't leave her side and she slid her hand into his, twining their fingers together.
"What now?" He asked as they finally headed towards their truck.
"Brunch at daddy's," she said as it was the Sunday tradition. "You don't have to come though, Daryl. You can go to the woods. I know you would much rather be in the woods right now," she said as she smiled up at him and he frowned down at her.
"You don't wan' me comin'?" He asked and there was something about his expression that made her purse her lips together.
He looked so confused and adorable and she felt laughter bubbling up in her because something was going on in his head but she couldn't figure out what.
"Of course you can come. If you want," she said and she stepped into him, slipping her arms around his waist. "But on Sundays, I go to my daddy's and you go to the woods. It's what we always do and I don't know why we would do it differently."
Daryl stared down at her, his eyes intent as if studying her, and his brow was furrowed as he was clearly thinking about what she said.
"A'right," he finally said with a nod but still seemed unsure. "If that's what you say."
She smiled. "It is. We're married now but we don't have to spend every second together. I think even we would get sick of each other if we did."
It looked like he wanted to smile at that. "Maybe I'll go with you this one time. Help with cleanin' up from yesterday. Thank your pops for everythin' he did for us."
Beth smiled wider because she really wouldn't have minded either way what he did but she was very glad that he had decided to come with her.
…
Thank you very much for reading and please review!