Chapter 9. Chapter 9. You know it's been a while since I last updated this. How long has it been since this hiatus? Two, three years of writer's block? Most likely. Since NO ONE has offered to HELP ME. The hiatus has gone by a lot longer than I have anticipated. I almost gave up on it until seeing another review. It wasn't much but it wasn't a lot either. But it made a difference, so I ended up going back to this. I've been busy with my other crossfic, "Yotsuba no Basuke". If you like Kuroko no Basuke and Yotsuba&! You'll love the adorably, funny crossfic. That's on hiatus, too, since I've been studying for finals. I'll try to at least update one of the two when I get the chance. College life is nuts. :P

~Gintoki's POV~

"So, that means he's...!" I managed to intercept Shinpachi's response with mine.

"He's a country, just like me..." I watched the disapproving look on Arthur's face. The way his brows wrinkled sadly made me feel sorry for him.

"So what do we know about this guy? Should we hate him or do we kill him?"

"Gin-san, I'm pretty sure those options are exactly the same thing." Shinpachi said to me, but I ignored him like I usually did in these situations. Why listen to old four-eyes here?

"Well," Arthur began. He rubbed his neck and averted his eyes as if he was almost hesitating, trying hard not to think too much about it. But he felt uncomfortable. The way he shifted in his seat to the fiddling he was doing with the envelope. I could have sworn there was sweat coming from his brow. "He's my brother, as I've already pointed out. We happen to fight a lot. Among the rest of my brothers, he's the one I'm not exactly in good terms with..."

I could have sworn he was gonna go on a tangent and give us a little sob story about how much he cared about his brother and that he didn't want to start fights with him, but wanted the best for him or something like that like the others who came before him. But, then I got this:

"He's an idiot with red hair and his breath reeks of cigarettes and he's an obnoxious drunk with nothing better to do than pick up women left and right and he must not have a hobby because he happens to have lots of fun picking fun at me along with the rest of my brothers while I'm the one helping his country and here he is vying for independence when he can't even put down a fucking cigarette butt. As if I didn't have enough to deal with, he's here, too. Back home, it's like I'm babysitting him making sure he doesn't cause any trouble in a bar somewhere nearby. It's really bothersome taking him home when he likes to put his weight on me. Even while drunk, he's doing all these things on purpose!"

Not the best response I was expecting, but it was a given. It wasn't the first time we've had problems like this. I would have to say, Arthur's no different compared to what we've taken care of. But, at the same time, I don't think I've ever had a country ask for my help before. He can't be an Amanto, either. I wonder what our country would look like as a human... an Amanto would be too much. I'd kick him in the balls for letting in these weird alien dudes walk all over the place. Not that I care. They're not my problem.

"He does sound pretty irresponsible doing things like that and then asking for something when he knows he shouldn't have." Shinpachi said.

"Sounds like a dick move." I put in.

"Tell me about it," Arthur replied. "Try sleeping tonight knowing that he's wandering the streets. Not to mention the fact that he knows where I live."

"We can always move you, Artie, I'm sure Shinpachi wouldn't mind you staying with him and Sis for a few days."

"Yeah," Shinpachi agreed but then made a face and looked at Kagura. "Wait, what?! Don't go making ideas without asking me, especially if it's my house!"

"So you don't want him staying at your place?" I asked Shinpachi a bit forcefully.

"I should be asking you that, Gin-san, you're the one with a job here."

"Correction: It's our job. And it's our job to protect the customer." I explained to him. "That's what the writing above my desk says."

"Mind your sugar levels." I heard Arthur read from his seat. "Splendid, just what does that have to do with your clients?"

"To make sure they don't overindulge."

"In what?"

"I-It just helps to have a little pep talk, okay?"

"Okay," Arthur chuckled. "So does that mean I'm staying here tonight or am I going somewhere else?"

"Well, I don't think it's a good idea to stay here if you don't want to bump into him again."

"Unless you wanna cuddle with Gin-chan, I'm sure he wouldn't mind either." Kagura suggested.

"Hell no!" I said immediately and it seems like both Arthur and I said it in unison. Somehow, I doubt staying here will work out either way. Then, I remembered something. "Oi... Arthur, when you mentioned your brothers... Just how many do you have counting your older brother?"

"Four." He said, "I can barely stand one. There's Scotland, Northern Ireland, Ireland and Wales."

"I didn't know you were part fish." I said. "Don't whales live in the ocean? Does that mean you're like a merman or something?"

"You git! That's 'whales'. And they happen to be mammals, mind you!"

"What's a mammal?" Kagura wondered in confusion. "But what's the difference between 'Wales' and 'whales', anyway?"

"I don't think this is going anywhere." Arthur gave in with a sigh and looked at the rest of us. "Seriously, what are we going to do?"

"Shinpachi~!" Kagura piped up.

"I-ugh..." Shinpachi sighed, it seemed he didn't have a choice in the matter. "So you guys really don't want to cuddle, do you?" I think he was teasing at that time, or was he just being a jerk? I couldn't tell. He was usually the straight man so everything is almost the same. "...I guess my sis wouldn't mind if you stayed over, I mean you met her already so I don't think you'd have any problem with her. But, her cooking skills are a different story."

A completely different story! Oh man, her cooking! I almost forgot about that. Should we just warn Arthur, or wait till he sees for himself? Her cooking is life-changing and I am absolutely terrified. Come to think of it, I would rather take sharing my bed with Arthur compared to that. It might dent my pride as a man having another man in bed with me, but it's not like I'm bending any rules. So don't get the wrong idea here. On the other hand, it would be awkward lying next to Arthur when you're trying to sleep at night. Well, he doesn't snore so that's one good point. Also, he's a guy. Unless I was into men (which I'm not), I don't think I would mind at all.

"What could possibly be wrong with her culinary skills? Surely, you jest." It seems Arthur didn't believe me when I said Otae's cooking sucked. Looks like he's just going to have to wait and see for himself.

~Both POVs~

Arthur couldn't really understand why Gintoki and Shinpachi were so against Otae's cooking. She was a decent woman, what could be so bad about it? Since Kagura had suggested this, they all happened to head over to Shinpachi's house in no time at all. Although, he felt a bit paranoid since reading his brother's letter... He wondered if everyone else was here? He wasn't really sure if this was some kind of practical joke. Because if it was, it's a well-played one. Whatever the case may be... He was afraid of the outcome. But somehow... He felt safe around these three. Arthur might not have been here long enough but he felt He could rely on them.

Everyone just seems so at home here, probably because they've been here countless times before. Shinpachi was playing some sort of hand-held game. Music was resonating from the game as he played, concentration bore his face as he pushed each button. There was an audience in the background with the voice of a young girl cheering as he progressed. Arthur wasn't sure what kind of game he was playing, but he looked as if he were having lots of fun while Kagura on the other hand, was enjoying some rice crackers that Otae had left on the table. He glanced over at Gintoki, he happened to be comfortable from where he was. He was laying down on the floor, not really doing much of anything.

He yawned and scratched his head. Just how on earth does he keep his hair like that? It's like a mop from the looks of it, a silver mop. Arthur thought. It took him a while but he spaced out. When he came to, Gintoki was looking right at him.

"What?" Heasked him. He didn't catch what he said the first time, but it was a good thing he asked again otherwise.

"Is there something on my face?"

"Oh, no. I was just thinking about something." The Brit replied. He was still a bit worried about Scotland finding him here. What business does he have here? Could he be the only one who could help me get back home? Let's not get too ahead of ourselves here, for all we know he could be the bad guy for Pete's sake!

"It's not my face you're thinking about is it?" Gintoki was smirking. Arthur wasn't sure what this guy's orientation was besides the fact that he has a crush on the weather girl but it seems he likes to tease him a lot, which left room for some questions. I'm not really sure if I'm just the only one that's uncomfortable here or if Gintoki's just completely gay for me. I can't blame him, though, hell I'm much more good-looking than that France.

"Here we are!" Otae said as she walked into the room with a tray of food for each of us. "Sorry for the wait."

"Hey, Big Sis! Need any help?" Kagura asked as she got up and moved the rice crackers away from the table.

"Oh! I forgot the rice in the kitchen. Would you get it Kagura-chan?"

"Okay." Kagura replied as she went off to the kitchen.

"Save some for all of us, okay?" Otae shouted to Kagura as she left. "I hope you don't mind, it's a bit overcooked." She said as she looked over at at Arthur with a shameless smile and a slight blush. Apparently, she was feeling a bit shy showing off her cooking skills to Arthur. He wasn't from Edo so she was a bit worried about the results.

Overcooked!? Shinpachi and Gintoki shouted in their heads. That's waaaaay beyond overcooked.

That's burnt to a crisp! Gintoki finished. He looked over at Shinpachi and the two whispers amongst themselves.

"Gin-san, what do we do? Do we stop him?"

"I think it's too late for him now, he didn't believe us when we said she was bad at this!"

Kagura returned with a huge bucket of rice and set it down as she sat next to Otae and the woman had given each of them an entire bowl of rice and waited for them to start picking out what they wanted, it seems she had made enough for all of them. "Come on, don't be shy. There's enough to go around."

Gintoki and Shinpachi were paralyzed, staring at the huge plate of... whatever it was that Otae had cooked up. Even now, they still weren't sure of what they were looking at. "Oi, Shinpachi.. Is it me or has your sister's cooking... got even worse?"

"That's beyond me, Gin-san. I think she killed someone and left the meat to deep fry and probably forgot about it."

"What the hell are you telling me, that your sister is Han***** Le****?!"

"Who the hell is that?! And why on earth was that censored?"

"Beats me, ask the writer! She's been out of commission on this fic for two years!"

"Shhh! No one was supposed to know that!"

"They know now!"

"What on earth are you idiots whispering about over there?" Arthur grumbled and shook his head. "If you two won't help yourselves, I'll take some." He said as he grabbed his chopsticks, although, he didn't use chopsticks as often as Japan and America did, so he had a bit of trouble but managed to at least get a piece of Otae's "creation". He was wondering what it was due to the odd appearance and the texture.

It was nice knowing you, Arthur. Gintoki said to himself as he watched Arthur devour what could be a person...or an animal...or a hybrid experiment gone wrong and Otae was the one to kill it, feeding them whatever was left of it that had been burnt to a complete crisp.

Arthur took a bite and paused a bit to savor the taste, it was a bit crunchy and it was spicy and a bit salty but at the same time it tasted a bit bland. He wasn't sure what it was but somehow it was every flavor except sweetness. He could have sworn something else was dumped into the mix but he couldn't make out the taste. "Otae... What is this exactly?"

It's death! And you just got a taste of it! Gintoki and Shinpachi were screaming at the top of their lungs in their thoughts, worried if Arthur had managed to survive that terrible ordeal. They were surprised he hadn't fainted yet. He's got balls of steel, I'll give him that. Gintoki couldn't help but praise him.

"It's an omelet." Otae replied with a smile. "Do you like it?"

"Well, can I be honest?"

Is he really going to say it!? Shinpachi was shaking with anticipation but at the same time scared for Arthur's safety. He just might get them all kicked out.

Does he understand now?! Gintoki was expecting it as well. Oh, God, please tell me he understands?!

"Is there something wrong with it?" Otae was a bit shocked but she wasn't angry, probably not yet from where Gintoki and Shinpachi were standing.

"Well, it is rather spicy and awfully salty..." Arthur explained. "It was a bit bland, too."

Oh no... Shinpachi was shaking with anticipation, scared that Arthur could get them all killed.

Here comes the hurt.

"But, with a bit more flavor it would be a lot better." Arthur said, "I actually liked it."

He's lost his mind! Gintoki and Shinpachi both shouted in their thoughts, they were not expecting Arthur to say something like that.

"I don't understand why you two don't like it very much. There's nothing wrong with it." Arthur said. "Here, have some." He said as he got closer to the silver-haired perm.

"Wh-What are you doing?!" Gintoki demanded, backing away as the Brit got closer each time. "Arthur, stop!" He was dodging Arthur's attempts at feeding him with every chance he got.

"Gintoki, please, just take a bite!"

"Why the hell are you feeding me?!" Gintoki snapped. "I'm a full-grown man, I don't need help eating!"

"I'm trying to prove you wrong!"

"I believe you! Now, stop! AAAHH!" Gintoki got up and ran, Arthur chasing after him.

"Hmm... Shin-chan, do you like my cooking?" Otae asked, looking to her little brother for reassurance.

"Uhm... Well..."

"Have a bite, then." She said, poking it at his cheek with a pair of chopsticks in her hand.

"S-Sis!"

Kagura was sitting at the table, eating the rest of the rice while everyone else was busy trying to feed each other. From where she was sitting, everyone looked like chickens with their heads cut off. She watched as Arthur and Gintoki were running around the place while Otae was bugging Shinpachi to take a bite. There was no way four-eyes could fake it. She ate the rest of the rice before moving on to finishing the rice crackers, keeping herself entertained while watching the scene right in front of her.

"This is a lot better than TV."

I'm actually done with finals right now. I'm on break. I managed to get this far into the story, let's see what I can do. XD The last few chapters sucked. But anyway, any other ideas to add to the fic or the next chapter, be my guest! (I'm dead serious, if you have any don't be scared to share them. This wasn't exactly the best piece of work I've done by far.)

Note: Censored name is Hannibal Lecter, for those of you who are curious about the name. I just wanted to censor it for funsies. XD

I need to start putting in more references because that's what Gintama is known for.